2 Year Old Nocturnal Wanderer

Updated on April 25, 2008
A.D. asks from Keller, TX
37 answers

My son has been in a big boy bed for 4 months now and has recently been getting up in the middle of the night. He usually takes the time to collect his critters and usually struggles to open the door with his hands full so a lot of the time we do hear him. Yet sometimes we don't hear him until he's in our room handing us his stuffed animals. (We still use a monitor because our HVAC system is right outside our bedroom door.) My biggest concern is he's going to fall down the stairs (16 of them straight down to ceramic tile). We always do the right back to bed thing and barely say anything to him other than "back to bed" or "don't get up when it's dark outside, please call for us if you need something" And last night - this was the kicker- he told me there was a monster in his room - he's 2! Any suggestions to keep him from getting up other than putting him back in a crib?

2 moms found this helpful

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

Thanks everyone for your input on the monster thing and the wandering. I was thinking he was a little young for monsters but I guess not! He has 3 stuffed animals he sleeps with that he carts around with him when tired and sometimes they're scared too. I'll try the monster spray and a song! As far as the gate, I really hate the idea of putting one at his door, we've put one up on the stairs but sometimes our dog tries to knock it down because he thinks he needs a drink in the middle of the night. Solved that issue by putting a bowl of water in our bathroom, (we'll see how long it takes him to realize it's ok to drink out of that at night.) Thanks again!

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.F.

answers from Dallas on

That sounds dangerous! My sister put a baby gate at my nephews bedroom door to stop the wandering, because they too had stairs.....they even make gates now that you can open like a doorway (childproof). I don't think I could sleep without him being safe, you poor thing....good luck.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.H.

answers from Dallas on

I have a friend who locked her twin daughters in their room at night so they would not wander in the night when they were toddlers. The girls are now eight years old and STILL terrifed of shut doors and being left in a room alone.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.D.

answers from Dallas on

I would also suggest the child proof door knobs. I actually put the knob on my door, so my son would be forced back to his own room, but as you have stairs i would suggest you put it on the inside of his door instead. A gate for the stairs would also be a good one.

Was he sleeping through the night before the big boy bed?

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.W.

answers from Dallas on

With my daughter we also sang Veggie tales...God is bigger than the...etc.But what worked the best was making up a story about why the monsters couldn't be in her room.

All the kids monsters aren't allowed to get out of their beds at night just like her.
And all the mommy and daddy monsters couldn't be in her room either because they were in their monster house sleeping and making sure that their monster kids were in their beds.
We would make up stories about what kind of pajamas they were wearing...or what kind of food the kid monsters liked best...of course it was Peanut Butter and Toe Jam sandwiches...My daughter was two also. My advice would be to just have fun with the situation...soon it will be just a wonderful memory like mine is.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.T.

answers from Dallas on

Purchase a gate either for the stairs (which is what i would do to begin with) or purchase a gate for his bedroom door. So if he gets up he can play in his room safely.

If it were me...I would put a gate up at his door, the top of the stairs AND the bottom of the stairs.

I am an over paranoid mom and worry that my daughter will fall down the stairs.

We live in a one level home and in a few months my DD will be moving to a toddler bed herself. We plan on putting a gate at her door.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.C.

answers from Dallas on

We had the same problem... We had to buy those door knob spinners. I think they are made by Safety First and they are made of white plastic. They just fit over the door knob - and, keep them from getting in doors or out of their room. We tried this and it worked great! Our son learned to knock on the door or call for us... then, we would just go up to his room instead of him coming down. It was a lot safer than chancing him falling down the stairs in the night. Hope this helps! Good luck! :)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

G.S.

answers from Dallas on

I hate stairs so much that I am putting up my house for sale because I can't stand it. My boys (ages 5 and 3) believe in monsters. We sing the Veggietales song "God is Bigger than the Buggie Man, bigger than Godzilla, or the monsters on tv... and He is watching out for you and me." They love it.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.C.

answers from Dallas on

Boys have such an imagination, even at 2 yrs!! My son is almost 3 now. He has been doing that for so long! I just remind him that we are in the next room and God is taking care of him. Most of the time it works. Most of the time, "I'm scared" is just an excuse.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.L.

answers from Dallas on

Don't know about the wandering, since if he can probably climb baby gates at that age, but as for the monster part: perhaps giving him a small flashlight would help, or a spray bottle full of water so he can spray for monsters. Or spray your "monster-repellent" together before he goes to bed. They may be imaginary to you, but at this age, they are completely real to him! There's a good Veggie Tales video, if you're into that, with a song called "God is Bigger Than The Boogeyman." Lyrics include:" God is bigger than the boogeyman. He's bigger than Godzilla or the monsters on TV...and he'll take care of me." It's called "Where is God When I'm Scared?"

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.K.

answers from Dallas on

We also were concerned about our son falling down the stairs, so we put a child proof lock on the door when he was litte...I know it is a fire hazard, but we felt he needed that for his own safety. We have a gate at the top of the stairs, but sometimes my husband forgets to lock the gate. Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.P.

answers from Dallas on

My daugter is 6, and she still does this. She'll get up in the middle of the night, run down the hallway, and come into our room (no stairs in our house). Sometimes she'll say something, but sometimes she is asleep. I have no advice-- just letting you know that it gets less frequent but may continue for years to come!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.A.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter was 2 when she started getting out of bed, coming down stairs to get in bed with us. She turned 4 this month and still does it 3-5 times a week. Sometimes it's 5am or after and I don't mind that so much...it's when it's between 1-4 that bothers me. I will take her back to bed 'if' I hear her...she usually climbs in on Daddy's side. I think because she knows he just lets her snuggle in. He does that because if he takes her back to bed, he's up for 1-2 hours and is shot for the next day! Sometimes she's sleeps in her own bed 2-4 nights in a row and we are sooo excited! But then she's back in our bed.

The stairs use to bother us too but they don't anymore. I think she's more stable on them than we are at night! :)

I think it's a phase with some kids...I wouldn't worry about it. I will be really enforcing the going back to bed thing starting in the fall as she'll begin Kindergarten the following year. Daddy will have to deal with it!

For the monster...before bed go through his room with him and point out that there are no monsters in the room. I always tell my daughter that angels are watching over her and keep away the monsters. We only talk happy thoughts before bed, along with prayers.

Hope this helps in some way.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.T.

answers from Dallas on

We had the same problem with our 18 month old. We had to put him in a bed very young, since he kept climbing out of his crib. You need to keep putting your child back in his bed. It will take awhile, but eventually, he'll learn. As so far as the stairs, you really need to put up a safety gate.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.S.

answers from Dallas on

Put chain locks at the top of all your outer doors - they sometimes figure out deadbolts faster than you'd like. Other ideas : A sturdy gate or door installed at the top of the stairs. A motion detector on his door.

My daughter just turned 3. For now she is still in the crib at night. Plus we have a safety net that zips over the crib. But we'll soon be testing out a toddler bed. Frankly , Im scared.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.M.

answers from Dallas on

You can try putting one of those child safety door knob things on the inside of his door so he can't get out. When mine were little I also used to put the baby gate at the top of the stairs to make sure they didn't take a tumble if they got out of bed at night.

I think you are doing the right thing, just add some more safety precautions.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.E.

answers from Dallas on

We haven't had any young'uns in the house for sometime, but I never liked the idea of locking a child in a room.
Friends of our have a "dutch door" on their 2 year old twin girls' bedroom. That way, the girls are safely shut into their room, but can still see out and hear what's going on in the house during the day. I don't know WHAT bearing that would have on you nightly visits, if any, just a two cents worth. =)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.S.

answers from Dallas on

My son started climbing out of his crib & wandering at 18 months. We put a hardware mounted gate (not pressure mounted!) at the top of the stairs so it couldn't be pushed down. He figured out how to open the door knobs (even with the white covers!) just after turning 2, so we put a window alarm on his door that goes off if the door is opened. We left it open until we went to bed, then closed the door to engage the alarm. If he opened the door, the alarm went off so we knew he was out roaming. He figured out pretty quickly that he had to stay in his room to keep the alarm quiet, but still sets it off occasionally when he's had nightmare and comes to us for comfort.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.C.

answers from Dallas on

I wouldn't go backwards with a crib, plus he would probably end up getting hurt climbing out of the crib. If you are worried about the stairs, we have a gate at the top and bottom of our stairs for our 2 year old, b/c we were worried about the same thing. I hope this helps! Good luck!! :)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.H.

answers from Amarillo on

Put some (critters) in bed with him when you put him in for the night.If he wakes he will see that his pal is there with him. Get a night light, explain to him there isn't any such thing as a "monster" but that if he just happens to get scared to call you. Make sure he hasn't saw any (scary tv shows), and maybe put a gate up at the top of the stairs after he has went to bed.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.M.

answers from Dallas on

On the subject of monsters, it is terribly common for a 2-year-old to be concerned about the monsters. I think at one point each of mine have been worried about monster or boogey-men. My now 4-year-old DD was particularly scared. She absolutely refused to fall asleep in her room. Loved her big girl bed. Loved her room. But would not fall asleep. I found out that her older sister was not so happy about sharing a room. She told her that there was a monster under the bed that would come out and eat her when she fell asleep. It took us about 2 years to get the littlest one to fall asleep in her own bed. One thing that we did was get "monster" spray. I had a bottle of some scented spray that she could spray around her room to repel the monsters. That along with a lot of encouragement helped.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.K.

answers from Oklahoma City on

A.
I have one of those myself. Thus I bought a child gate for the bathroom door, the living room and the back door. It does not keep him in his bed but it does keep him safe from harming himself. He ultimately ends up on myside of the bed. And together back down the hall to bed. They make child gates in all sizes, and they serve mutiple purposes. Good luck.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.B.

answers from Dallas on

I just went through this with my two year old son. I use a door knob guard. Because his door knob won't latch into the doo hickie in the frame (I am a single mom and don't know how to fix it), I put the door knob guard on my door. He was wanting to bring all his animals and get in bed with me. I tried everything to keep him in bed and out of my room. I tried for three months to be exact. Then I tried the door knob guard. At first he would stand outside my door and cry - maybe for a minute, but then he went back to his bed. This went on about two nights. Every now and then I still hear him get up, but he sees my door closed and knows he can't get in and without crying I hear him go back to bed. So, you could try putting a door knob guard on his door or try a baby gate. I got lots of suggestions on Mamsource for that. My child would climb over that, so it wasn't an option for me. I didn't think he would ever break this habit, but he did. Hang in there!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.T.

answers from Dallas on

Hello A., I'm a Nanny of a 2 yr old who does the same thing but him he's still in a crib. What his parents have done is put the lock on his door outside. the lock has been reversed and we lock the dooor when he goes to sleep. He climbs out of his crib and comes down the stairs just like your son. Sometimes I tell him that I will lock the door if he gets out of his bed again. He still does it but at least he stays in his room if he happens to get out of his bed. Try that and see if that works.

Hope this helps a bit.
Bea Taylor

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.E.

answers from Dallas on

That seems a little young to be put in a big bed especially if he's been in it for 4 months. We didn't put my daughter in her big bed until she was 3 years old. She is almost 5 and still gets up every once in a while. I don't have an upstairs but if he is getting up in the middle of the night you sleep on an upper floor you need to childproof your stairway. You didn't say you had one but there are gates you can buy to put at the top of your stairs to keep little ones from falling down them. They are made for just that purpose. Other than any advice for keeping him in bed, I would say get used to it because it happens and it may be that he's still a little young to understand. Hope this helps.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.H.

answers from Dallas on

my youngest did this to. Try to put a baby gate at the stairs for safety. My son just stopped after a while. Does he sleep in PJs? We figured out that he was getting cold at night so now we always make sure he is in something.
His imagination is growing leaps and bounds. Just show him what he thinks are monsters. And maybe put a really dim night light in there after he as fallen asleep.
good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.D.

answers from Dallas on

Don't let him watch scary cartoons. He's 2 so Monster INC could be scary.......My son was terrified of the care bears, because of the Evil looking charaters. I'd also be consistant. Keep telling him to go to bed, if you don't you are just helping the problem. If need be, get a night light to go out in the hallway. That way he would have the light as a reminder you are right there. This is something that has always worked for me, no matter the situation, I prayed over my children when they are going to bed. That has always made my children feel safe and secure. Praying for the Angels of God to stand before my home and protect us in any given situation. God has never failed to ease my childrens fears
good luck
T.

p.s. Though the monster spray may sound good, and work for many parents...why encourage the child that there is a monster in his room....Now the child will believe he needs to spray his room to get rid of a monster that was never there. Why give him that idea? Why not tell the truth, there is no monster in your room.....other wise you lie to him.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.A.

answers from Dallas on

We have had a baby gate at the entrance of our son's room since he started sleeping in a big boy bed. He went through a phase where he was getting up in the middle of the night or just refusing to go to sleep when we put him down at night. Just make sure his room is completely child-proofed. This way you'll know he is safe and he'll eventually realize there's no point in getting up and start falling back asleep on his own.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.K.

answers from Abilene on

First and foremost, get a gate for those stairs!! Have you tried a babygate at his door, so that if he does get up, he can play quietly in his room?
As for the monster issue, do not tell him there is no such thing, get a spray bottle, set at the finest mist, filled with water and labeled "Monster's Be Gone" you can hunt for them together and tell them it is time for them to go home, and gently spray the room, wait a few minutes and go re-check, be sure to thank the monsters for being good listeners! With monstrs used as puppets on almost everything we watch now, he may not be afraid, just wanting you to see what he sees. Hope this helps!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.H.

answers from Dallas on

I'd definatley gate the door and the hall before the stairs. You can double the hall so that it's too tall for him to climb over. If you gate his door to his room, you can get a taller size and sill leave about 2 inches from the floor. Get one that permanently hooks to the door frame so that he can't just push it down. This is strictly for saftey, since you have the monitor, he can call you if he needs you. As for monsters, I tolf my kids that monsters were not allowed in my house and they knew if they ever were caught in my house they'd get a good washing out. My kids still needed a little something extra, so I got them a new stuffed animal that was the "monster's monster" or the "monster eater". My kids would grab that stuffed animal when they got scared because it had that special title. I also sometimes put soft pleasant music on when putting them back to bed.

Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.R.

answers from Dallas on

We did a gate at the doorway to our son's room and it worked for a while until he figured he could crawl over it! I would do the gate at the top of the stairs as well as maybe halfway down. If he did get through the gate at the top of the stairs he would not tumble all the way down. Our middle daughter is our Phantom Potty girl. She just gets up and wanders (sleep walking) and pees wherever she feels like it! Most of the time we catch her.

As far as monsters go, we do a go away monsters song and pretend to make them all go away to their beds since it's his bed time. They can come back in the daylight and play when we can see them!

Good luck

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.G.

answers from Amarillo on

My only advice is you have to get a safety gate for the top of the stairs! Don't chance him falling down them. It will give you some piece of mind if he gets up to wander.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.P.

answers from Dallas on

I just had to mention... my 9 year old step-daughter had a problem of getting out of bed & waking us up on the weekends we had her. When I got onto her about it, she gave me the "monster in my room" excuse. SHE'S NINE YEARS OLD! The best one was when she told me she couldn't control her legs. It just ticked me off when she said that, but after the fact, I thought about what a shock it would've been to her if I'd said "What? You can't control your legs? Well, get in the car. We're going to the hospital so they can perform a brain scan and take your blood and give you shots to see why you're walking around at night beyond your control." Maybe that would've scared some sense into her. Anyway, I just had to share that story. Best of luck to you!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.O.

answers from Dallas on

Hi A. -

Not much new advice here, but I did want to add my two cents. Definitely get a gate for the top of the stairs. We have a wonderful gate that swings like a door and even has a motion sensor light that lights up the walkway/stairs in the dark. You can leave the gate open or shut, depending on when you need it.

As for the monsters.... we have simply told our daughter since she was very little that monsters are our friends and we like them.... She loves Sesame Street and we remind her about Cookie Monster, Telly Monster, Elmo Monster and Zoe Monster. We tell her that there are no such thing as mean monsters... They are all nice!

And, to keep her in her room and SAFE at night, we have a child SAFETY knob lock on her room. We have them on the front and back doors, too. When she was very little (2) we simply shut the door at night. She has a monitor in her room and if she needed us, she just called for us from her bed, or got up and knocked on her door and we went to her immediately. She was never scared, because she knew that we would always come right away when she needed us. (When she was potty training, she had a special potty right in her room to use during the night if she wanted to....)

Now that she's older and fully potty trained, we leave her door open and just make sure that the stair gate is closed. (She can manuver the stairs just fine, now, but we don't want her to be able to go downstairs and wander around, if she is ever up when we are sleeping.)

The door lock works PERFECTLY for getting her to stay in her bed at night, even when we don't close the door. How? We tell her that as long as she stays in bed, the door gets to stay open like a big girl. When she starts doing the, "I need a drink of water.... I need to go potty.... I forgot to kiss you (which she didn't)..." string of excuses to get up, we simply tell her that she can choose to stay in her bed like a big girl, or we will have to close her door until she goes to sleep. (We always open it after she is asleep).

Our daughter would never stay in her toddler bed after she started crawling out of her crib, so this was the safest option for her. As for everyone who says it is cruel to "LOCK" your child in their room... It is alot crueler to leave your little one in an unsafe situation. What if your son woke up and wandered down the stairs and fell or got into something dangerous while you were fast asleep?

Our daughter is happy and well-adjusted and has learned that as long as she is a big girl and only gets up to go to the bathroom or get a drink of water that her door will always be open. It may only take a few days of the door being shut for your son to learn that he must stay in his bed if he wants his door to stay open or it may take longer, but whichever, it is important for his safety. Alot of times, our daughter wants her door to be closed anyway....

Good luck and best wishes!

K.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.P.

answers from Dallas on

Well...my mom would say to put a hook type lock at the top of his door to keep him from exiting his room. This is not wise because of fire etc. Give him some monster spray (spray bottle with water in it) and have him spray his room and sleep with it beside the bed. I don't really have any suggestions, but I would consider placing a child safety gate at the top of the stairs (so he does not tumble down the stairs) or at the entrance of his bed room to keep him from leaving his room. Also make sure he has a night light. Helps combat those monsters.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.W.

answers from Dallas on

I agree with Trish that you need a gate on his room and at least at the top of the stairs.

I had a friend who gated her daughter's room and told her that it was up to the daughter when the gate was removed. When she stopped getting up and wandering around the house.

I've heard of the "monster spray" idea before, except to use some Lavender spray..or some scent that will relax him.

I love the idea of Veggietales "God is Bigger than the Boogie man"...it's a great video!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.B.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter recently started talking about monsters under her bed, she will be 3 this week. I asked her what monster and she told me the snakes were under the bed. I had no idea what she was talking about. i have a huge fear of snakes and we did just go to the zoo and I told her mommy couldn't go to the reptile house, when asked why "mommy doesn't like snakes". So anyways, I got a spray bottle and added "magic" (just pretended to add these things) water, lemon juice, and some other things from the closet to the bottle. When she asked why there wasn't anything in there I told her that is was special monster juice and only the monsters could feel it. I showed her how to spray under her bed and anywhere else there is monsters ( she took care of the ones in her sisters crib as well) and told her the monsters don't like to be wet and they will leave if she sprays them. She keeps the bottle by her bed and sprays when she gets scared. (( I know I should just tell her there are no monsters but really when the two yr old is determined to believe "no" just doesn't work) I don't have any monsters in my house and she sleeps just fine now. As far as the stairs I agree with everyone else. Use a baby gate.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.W.

answers from Dallas on

Hey, A.! First things first. Put a gate at the top of the stairs! When my five children were young, they would often come to us in the nighttime, and we never just sent them back to bed. Two-year-olds have NO concept between what's real and what isn't, so his concern over the monster in his room seems trite, to him it is very real. I'm a firm believer in allowing kids to come to my room. If they wake up in the middle of the night and need you, that's when they need you. What else has changed in your world? Perhaps he has a genuine reason for the wakefulness. Bear with him. This, too, shall pass.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions

Related Searches