2 Healthy Children and 1St Time Miscarriage

Hello A.,

I am so sorry for your loss. I know how much this hurts, in my case, not knowing if it was something I did to cause the miscarriage or not. I have to believe that my baby was sick and Jesus spared his/her life from pain. Prior to having my miscarriage, I have three healthy babies, ranging in ages from 10 yrs to 21 months old. Last year, I found out I was pregnant carried my baby for about 12 or 13 weeks, just through that period of time of having morning sickness & then started to feel normal again. Then I miscarried.

My husband and I have to believe everything happens for a reason, even though we may not understand at the time. About 2 to 3 weeks prior to when my due date would have been, I had an appendicitis. I wonder if that would have had anything to do with my situation. Shortly after my surgery, I found out that I was pregnant, only 2 months to go! Just pray about it and I am sure you too will be blessed again with another little miracle.

Take Care,

J. W

so sorry to hear about your lost.....i just went through the SAME EXACT thing last year.....i had a missed miscarriage and didnt know i lost the til i went in for my first ultra sound...i had actually lost the baby four weeks prior to that appointment.....but i too right before i found out i was preggo was working out hard and heavy...taking step classes and running on the eliptical....then after i found out i was pregnant i continued as the doctors suggested....and a part of me thinks that the exercising contributed to it..because with my first 2 i didnt routinely exercise and they were perfectly healthy.....but the miscarriage was hard on us...expecially because my oldest kept asking about his baby brother/sister....but we didnt have the heart to tell him what happened.... so we just explained to him that i dont have a baby in my tummy anymore that god decided he wasnt quite ready to give her/him up just yet....and he seemed to except that.

I just wanted to let you know that I will keep you in my prayers. Just trust in the Lord, He will bring you and your family through this trying time. God bless.

we tried 5 years beforeI got pregnant. At about 4 weeks I missed carried. Well about 4 months later I was pregnant again that babyboy is now Capt in the USAF. 5 years later a girl who is graduating Friday from FAU's honors college, math and physics. Both were premies well they are posties now. They have made me forget about my lost one.I was too busy with them to have worry time. When I asked why Ilost the first one, I was told some times the plcenta doesn't make properly. Exercise is okay ask your OBGYN what happened. I had a DNC and was told you have a better chance getting pregnant after a DNCGet off the one you lost and give more attention to your other two. They need you!!!

First of all the majority of women experience a miscarriage in their life. it has nothing to do with working out. Working out is good for your body and for your pregnancy. I can name numerous friends and family members I know who have all had miscarriages (some more then one) and never worked out. A friend of mine took 3 years to get pregnant with her 2nd and had numerous miscariages. You need to not stress out and try again. Stress is one factor that can cause a miscarriage. You children are still so young, maybe your body just hasn't fully recovered from the last birth yet. Getting pregnant in the 1st 2 mths is not that common so wait awhile and see how things go. If you have more miscarriages or can't get pregnant after a year then worry and see someone. Normally miscarriages are good in a way they happen when the fetus isn't healthy enough to survive or has serious problems. With my second pregnancy I had mono at the beginning with high fevers. Both of my OBGYN's said they were surprised I never miscarried. They said most people who have that miscarry and that the baby must be strong and health to have survived the high fevers. I am in my third pregnancy and never had any problems with my last pregnancies and deliveries. This one has been totally different. I had high liver counts, almost hospitalized, swelling and discomfort all of the time. All pregnancies are different you can have 5 great pregnancy and be on bed rest for the 6th. You never know, so don't take stuff for granted. Being pregnant and having a heathly child are truly blessings. Good luck

I've had 3 miscarriages and I know I have read in one of those pregnancy books that 1/3 of pregnancies end in a miscarriage. It's harder than people think to get pregnant. It has to be timed just right. It distressing to have a miscarriage so just give it time and work your way into understanding that God planned it that way. Talk with your pastor/priest and your husband.

I remember when I had my 3rd one, my grandfather tried to blame it on my husband because he "let me" move heavy boxes. It's just not true. A girl I work with did karate up to her 7th month! I've heard of others running up till their 8th month.

Don't give up hope and don't give up the gym for this one instance. You are right that this was a child, but God does things for reasons we don't comprehend.

Who knows why some people that want children so much -- can't? I know it's easier said than done, but take your time.

Sorry to hear about that.
I will pray you have no more problems.

-- In my own personal experience, I was told I had a "blighted ovum," meaning I had gotten pregnant with a day old egg, and the pregnancy was there... but it didn't develop any further. So, when I began to bleed, I was hospitalized and they performed a D&C. It didn't take long for me to get pregnant again... oh about three months.

As for the gym, if you tend to work out heavily, it may make your periods light. So, just don't over-do it. As for your daughter, I remember telling my two boys after they got a little older, about the loss of their sister, Carey Ann, due to an umbilical cord twisting. I told them she was in heaven, but they seemed quite concerned... still... so I reassured them she was in heaven with God, and that I was okay. Your own daughter may be concerned about her mommy, as well. A little reassurance and prayer with her, should help to ease her mind.

As for YOU, mom... no matter "what" time of a pregnancy you lose a baby, it hurts. Only time, and words of sweet comfort and healing from others when sharing your story will help.

I hope my own story is a little helpful for you.

God bless you!! ...and yours.

A.,

It is very painful and sad to loose a baby. I remember having some spotting with my first pregnancy and my husband and I went to the dr. that morning who suggested we return that afternoon for an early ultrasound. My husband whet off to work and I rested at home. When he came home to get me and go to the apointment I knew that I was having a miscarriage. He could tell from the look on my face, no words were spoken we both just broke down and cried. We were so blown away; we never dreamed that we would loose the baby and had already told our friends and family that I was expecting. I think I was about 14-16 wks. The doc still did the ultrasound and confirmed that in fact there was no egg sack and which ment the baby was not growing at the normal rate or that I was having a miscarriage. I had this woman tell me that she had a miscarriage before she had her first baby but three months later she was pregnant again and now has two beautiful grown children. I didn't want to hear that and I felt she was being a little heartless and insenstive; however, within three months I was pregnant and now have a beautiful 4y.o. Then I got pregnant again and was about the same point in my pregnancy and I began spotting. I just knew I was having another miscarriage. I went to the ER to confirm and they made me sit around for 8hrs. because they mixed up my labs with another person. The tests were inconclusive but by the end of 8 hours I could tell them that I was having a miscarriage. They sent me home and told me to come back if I was bleading heavely. That was the kiss of death because three hours later I was passing so much blood that each time I stood up I had to change my pad. That one night in the hospital was misreable! Three months later I was pregnant with my now 10 month old. She is great and both my girls are healthy and thriving. I was working out, hight impact/intensity with the second misscariage but I also worked out throughout the entire pregnancy following the miscarriage. I tried to find a reason. I wanted it to be that my blood type is Rh- when the baby's was Rh+ but I was assured over and over again by several medical professionals that had no impact on the miscarriage. I thought maybe I was working out and caused the miscarriage as well. Now I don't feel that is true. What I do believe is that both of thoes pregnancy's were not viable therefore my body did the natural thing and expelled them. Had I continued to carry them I may have had two unhealthy children who had severe disabilities that would burden them all thier life. For that reason, and the fact that I have two exceptionaly beautiful girls, I don't morn the loss of thoes pregnancies. I am sure you are learning that many many women experience misscariages and that it happens more than we know. The miracle of life is just that a miracle. It is amazing what our bodies do for us and what we take for granted. I hope for you that your story will end with joy and hapiness abundant.

My sincerest condolances,
D.

I"m so sorry this happened to you. I lost my first the same way. Only I went to the OB and took the test and it was positive only to have the identical situation the following day. Everything I have read says that if you are already on a fitness program then you should be fine to continue it untill it becomes uncomfortable (ie, don't start one when you get preggo). I contributed my loss to trying to soon after birth control. See, I ran out of pills about 2 weeks before I got married, then about a month after was when I realized I was preggo, then it all went downhill. If you just quit the pill, that may be what happened to you too. So we tried again, and she was perfect. Of course I had breakthrough bleeding with both of my kids and since my first experience, freaked out. Mourn the loss of your baby, but don't give up. I don't know if you're religious, but someone told me when I was going through this that sometimes God needs a beautiful flower for his bouquet.

A.,

I am very sorry to read about your miscarriage. I know about the timing, I found out I was pregnant and miscarried that night.

I believe we should feel our feeling and let our children see them and learn it is okay to express felling appropriately.
The best way I have found to do this is to just sit with the feeling. Pray and meditate and feel and feel some more. It takes about an hour or so and I am ready to get up and move on. Nap time may be a good time to try this. If there is more stuff coming up I do the same thing until it feeling are gone for good.

This is a great loss and needs to be grieved.

B. L

Do NOT, I repeat do NOT, blame yourself. Its mother nature. Yes, this happened to me in a different way. And I felt like it was because I took hot baths, or used a heating pad or did anything. I felt like I could have caused it. But moral of the story it happened and happened for a reason. You never know GOD works in mysterious ways. I took me about 4 months to get over my situation and I thought I would never get pregnant. But when I finally cleared my mind and accepted it. I got pregnant again!! I am not a big religious person but this website helped me get through it, by seeing how many women this really happens too. Good Luck and let me know if you need anyone to talk to. http://beehive.thisisplymouth.co.uk , in the website you have to search miscarriages. and it will take you to the prayer book.

Sounds like what I experienced about a year ago. We were trying and I suspected I was pregnant and the test was positive. We were ecstatic. The next day at work I bled a little but then more and more. My husband and I were so heartbroken. My OB said I had chemical pregnancy. He assured me I did nothing wrong. 4 mons later I was pregnant again and I have a very healthy 3 mon old baby boy. I have a 9 yr old daughter and I'm 38 yrs old.
It took me about a week to get over the shock and sadness. It still does bother me that even though I was only 27 days along, it was still a life. I guess it just wasn't meant to be. Maybe the egg was old? I'll never know. I'll say a prayer for you.
~G.

I have not experienced this kind of loss, but I did a lot of worrying about what ifs during my two pregnancies. One thing I came to understand was that no matter what I did or did not do during my pregnancies, God was able to give me a healthy baby if that was what He wanted for me. If it was NOT what He wanted for me, nothing I could do (treatments, surgeries, multivitamins, whatever) could change that either. We do not know the mind of God, only what He has chosen to reveal to us (which many times is far less than what we want to know), but I do know that if God had intended for you to carry your baby to term, you would have. Working out at the gym could never change what God had planned for you! For whatever reason, that you may never know, God gave this to you to endure. You did not CAUSE this. God is much bigger than anything you could do. Please try to be at peace about causing this, because you did not. I will pray for you as you struggle to deal with the loss.

Oh, I'm so sorry! We are also trying to get pg, so I can imagine how upset you must be.
But studies have shown that about 1/3 of ALL pgs end in miscarriage (with two healthy ones prior you are actually right on par).
Most of the really early miscarriages (before 6 weeks) are due to the embryo not developing right (empty sack or chromosomal defect)-- our bodies recognize this and then miscarry. With the accuracy of early pg tests now, so many more women are realizing this, but it's really quite normal and our bodies doing what they should.
So keep trying, exercise, eat healthy, and don't worry. I'm sure you will be pg again soon! Good luck!

Hi A.,
I am so sorry for your loss. My situation is the exact opposite of yours, I had a miscarriage with my first pregnancy and then had 2 beautiful baby girls after. You really can not blame yourself, I'm sure the exercising had nothing at all to do with it. Miscarriages are SO COMMON, that is why OB's don't usually schedule to see you until you have missed 2 periods. I know that is not a comfort but it is true, it is nature's way of saying something just wasn't right with that one. My OB told me once my body had a normal period on it's own it was safe to start trying again and that is what we did. Let yourself grieve, it is a loss regardless of how far along you were. Keep your spirits up and smother your 2 babies with all the love you can :) They are true blessings! Good luck!

Dear A.,
Let me say how very sorry I am for you. I know how youe feel. I was about 5 wks when I miscarried our first baby. I have since had three beautiful children.
We had to wait 6 weeks to try again. I got pregnant immediately with our son.
My prayers are with you and your husband. Don't let anyone tell you that just because you have two children you should not be sad, because they are wrong. You still lost one and it is very sad and hard. It does not matter that you were only 4 and a half weeks it is still sad and hard.
The best thing I heard wqas from a woman who had no children, but was very Godly in her words. She said something like- You are a mom because you have a baby waiting to meet you in heaven. I was still sad, but it really helped in the later.
God bless!
If you ever need to talk just write me ____@____.com

That happened to me also and I was about 2 1/2 - 3 weeks pregnant with our 1st baby. If I had not tested so early and had it confirmed by my Dr., I would have just thought I started my period. Working out is good for you and should not cause a miscarriage. I go to jazzercise and do not believe it had anything to do with a miscarriage. If for some reason you are unsure about working out I would talk to your Dr. about this. I will say that I was already working out prior to getting pregnant. I have heard that when you are pregnant is not the time to try to start a workout routine that you were not previously doing. If you have been working out and your body is accustomed to the activity you should be fine. I did however take it down a notch to low impact when I got pregnant the 2nd time. I think it is better to watch your impact as far as jumping & hopping. Most exercises can be taken down to a low impact and still getting a great workout. My 2nd pregnancy went wonderfully and I have a beautiful 16 month old. I do not know your faith, but I do believe there is a reason this happens. I believe God is in control of our lives as much as we like to think we are and I believe the children we have are angels from Heaven. We do not have to understand why and we humanly can not and that is where your faith steps in. Faith will get you through but it is always OK to remember your little one that was unborn and grieve. That baby had a soul if not a body yet and that soul will greet you in heaven.

I'm sorry for your loss. 25% of pregnancies end in miscarriage. The number is probably higher but some pregnancies end before the woman even knows that she is pregnant. Most miscarriages occur because the embryo fails to develop properly. This is often a chance occurence and the next pregnancy will usually be fine. There is not much you can do to cause a miscarriage. Sex, exercise, doing too much, etc. do not cause miscarriages. If this were the case we would not have survived as a species.

Having had two healthy children you will most likely have a healthy pregnancy next time. Since your miscarriage was so early it was probably due to the embryo not developing properly. This is called a chemical pregnancy and here is a link about it: http://www.babyhopes.com/articles/chemical-pregnancy.html

I have had two miscarriages. One at 9 1/2 weeks, then I went on to have my son. Then I had another at 10 1/2 weeks, which was tested and found to be due to chromosomal issues. I am now 12 1/2 weeks pregnant and things are fine so far. Your chances of having another successful pregnancy are very high. Also, there is some debate as to whether you have to wait to try again. Some say it's okay to try as soon as you ovulate. You can research this on the internet. I wish you the best.

A.; I have misscarried that early aswell and your right to grieve. There's nothing wrong with that. Don't stay in that place too long though. There's so much more that you have to be thankful for right before you. Also, don't blame yourself. All things will work out for you in the end. Just have hope and encourage yourself daily to push on.

I have been thru this (at 9&1/2 weeks) found out during a sonogram. It does hurt so much - I will pray for your healing. You have to know that God made our bodies to be amazing and that sometimes you have been thru this and have never known it. This is hurtful, painful and upsetting. You shouldn't like you are not allowed to feel bad cuz you already have kids...this is normal to feel a lose..morn as you should and give the pain to God and know that your Father above will help you and your tiny angel.
btw your workouts didn't make this happen.
send me a private message if you have any questions about my situation or you can ask for my number and I'd be glad to talk with you.
Take care and God Bless
A.

Hi A.,

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I lost twins at the very beginning of my pregnancy also. I don't think it could have hurt any worse and my husband was a wreck.

I really don't think working out is a problem. You need to be healthy to carry a child and working out will help. Just don't go overboard. The workout schedule you have now is not too much. Working out will also improve your mindset as the endorphins get pumping.

Along with the working out, get on a good absorbable multivitamin for the pregnancy you are anticipating and make sure you are already on folic acid. Omegas are good for the eye and nuerological development also. Stay away from extra strong chemicals like fertilizers and paints and supplies. I know sometimes it's unavoidable but you need to make that effort since your husband is exposed on a regular basis.

A., I had no idea how many women had miscarriages until I had one myself. People came out of the woodwork to tell me how sorry they were for my loss and what they had been through. And you do have my prayers!

God bless!

M.

The miscarriage had absolutely nothing to do with going to the gym. Don't give up on that, even while pregnant...you will have a healthier pregnancy & easier delivery because of it. I was doing a "bootcamp" cardio class when I became pregant, and continued until I was 12 weeks, then switched to an aquatics class until the end. It's horrible that you had the miscarriage, and I really feel for you...but it had nothing to do with anything you did or didn't do. Sometimes it's just not a viable pregnancy & your body knows that better than you do. You're in my thoughts!

My prayers and my heart go out to you. I, too, suffered early miscarriages and it does hurt. Since you asked for prayer I feel comfortable saying that it wasn't your fault because you were / are going to the gym. For whatever reason God felt that it wasn't the right time for you. Give it time, give it His time. And while you're waiting talk to your husband about how you feel. You may not feel like you can show your grief to your other children but your husband probably feels that way about you too. He's hurting, too, right now. The grieving together will help both of you through this time. Also, remember that you are still dealing with rapidly changing hormones... Again my prayers and heart are with you.

Sometimes the body knows something is not right. I believe when it's that early it could be what is called a blighted ovum...just was not going to progress. Don't stop exercising as from what i've been told it really has no bearing on it and keeping yourself healthy is most important. Just slow it a little if you will. A loss, is a loss, and God bless you in this journey. There is nothing wrong with grieving. Just keeping working on your health and wellbeing.

A.,
I am sorry for your loss. It is hard to loose a baby, no matter the size. Mourn your loss, lick your wounds and try again in a few months. Exercise is good for your, it did not cause your loss.

In Sympathy,
S.

You aren't alone. I'm sorry it had to happen to you, but it isn't your fault. I also had an early miscarriage - 5 weeks. And I know it doesn't matter that it was so early, it does hurt terribly. My ob said to wait also, but I just couldn't. And I got pg about 2 1/2 weeks after I miscarried - although I didn't know about it for 5 more weeks. I kept waiting for my period to start and it didn't so I went back to my OB and she tested me again and it came back very positive and she said it was a different pregnancy - I thought maybe I just hadn't lost the first pg. Anyway, I hear a lot of stories about women who get pregnant almost right away after a miscarriage. You could just trust that what is going to happen will, and let nature take its course. I think that if your body wasn't ready to get pg, you won't. If it is ready, you will. And if you are truly worried about exercising, just use the treadmill and weights at the gym. Don't run or do aerobics. You could cycle. Best of luck to you. It will get easier as time goes by.
Jen

I'm sorry for what you are going through. It sounds to me as though you had what is called a "chemical pregnancy" I had the same thing before becoming pregnant with my daughter. You did nothing wrong. Miscarriage is natures way of purging something that is not right. When this happened to us, I felt sad too. The following month we were pregnant again, and I carried to term with our daughter. Keep your chin up! Keep trying and rest assure that you are doing everything right.