16M Won't Wear Shoes

Updated on July 22, 2009
K.R. asks from Weedsport, NY
10 answers

My daughter will not let me put shoes on her. When I try to she shakes her foot and cries hysterically. I have put them on for minutes and she won't walk she just cries. Has anyone out there had this kind of trouble? Also how did you get it accomplished?

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L.T.

answers from New York on

I made putting on shoes a game. I let him play with them when there was no expectation for putting them on. I would put my shoes or Dad's shoes next to them and talk about how we all wear shoes. I just didn't make it a big deal and eventually he started trying to put them on himself or let me put them on him for a little while. He did love his Robeez shoes so it was only harder sole shoes that I had a hard time with or anything new. He still resists new shoes but letting him play with them still works.
Hope this helps.

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D.S.

answers from New York on

I would take her for a professional fit it could be possible she needs a wide with and her current shoes are uncomfortable. Have you tried sandals or crocs most kids love them for the comfort.

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K.P.

answers from New York on

Does she do this with socks too? If so, then maybe try open-top sandals so that the bottoms of her feet are covered, but her feet aren't restricted. If socks don't bother her, try soft shoes like pediped. They have some structure, but aren't rigid.

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L.L.

answers from New York on

Maybe they are very uncomfortable for her. Could they be too small or too narrow? Perhaps try a different brand or get her professionally fitted.

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L.G.

answers from New York on

I second the suggestions to get a professional fitting. I'd also try a softer shoe like a robeeze or bobux - they don't need super heavy rigid shoes at this age.

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P.K.

answers from New York on

As she gets older and realizes she cannot go to the park etc. she might reconsider. Until then, maybe try something that is a bit bigger on her feet. Have you
had her foot measured by an old fashioned shoe store
man (not a teenager). We have someone in Carmel, NY
who is amazing with children. He has been there for
40 something years. In the meantime, just keep trying.
Try sneakers, sandals, or how about Robeez. I know it is
frustrating but eventually she will put shoes on. Good
luck.

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L.D.

answers from Albany on

Have you taken her to Strideright or someplace where they have a real shoe professional to measure her feet and make sure she is wearing the correct shoe? Perhaps the size doesn't feel right or she needs a wide/narrow or perhaps there is something about her arch that needs a special insert in any shoe. These are just some ideas. I've never heard of a child crying over having a shoe on for no reason though so my first thought would be to rule everything out.

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T.W.

answers from New York on

Hi K.,
What about sneakers that have Barney, Big Bird, or even the ones that light up. My kids never wore shoes in the summer unless we went out somewhere that requires them. I did however start them in shoes as soon as they started standing and walking. If this doesn't work I would talk to your pediatrician to make sure she doesn't have an orthopedic problem which I doubt but it will cover all bases. I don't know about you but I'm with your daughter, I don't want to wear shoes in the summer, unfortunately I have to at work.
T.

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M.B.

answers from Rochester on

K.,
I have been reading - soft shoes are better. They get better traction. Or no shoes at all. I get razzed by friends but I would rather have him comfortable on his feet than bruises from falling all over. he's already gotten in trouble with sneakers that have an inflexible sole, and he tripped down3 stairs. He doesn't have any problems with stairs.

Good luck,
M.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.B.

answers from New York on

Hi K.,

Some kids just don't like clothes or shoes, but they grow out of that in time. I would suggest letting her go barefoot as much as you can (no need to pick that fight if it's not NECESSARY to have shoes). However, when she does need to be in shoes, stay calm. It can be incredibly frustrating to have her fight you like this, but once she figures out that she can push your buttons with these tantrums, she's only likely to do it more.

Getting a good fitting is a great idea and also let her pick out her very own shoes ... the brightly colored or sparkly "jelly" sandals might work because they have flexible soles, let the foot breathe and come in such kid-friendly colors.

Good luck!

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