10Mo with a New Attitude, Sleeping Schedule, and Eating Habits- What to Do?

I have to say that he sounds completely normal to me. Many of the things he is going through would start happening at this age irregardless of whether or not his daycare positioning had changed. I'm sure the 2 year old is influencing him to some degree, but he was with her before so it's not that drastic.

What is dramatically changing at this age is his communication level. Vanae was right, he realizes now that those around him are communicating and he wants to also. I've worked in the 1-2 year old room in my church nursery for 3 years now and I know how frustrating it can be when the parents don't teach their child any communication and that's from the adult side, I can only imagine how frustrating it is for the child. I would do Baby Sign and Speaking Hand in Hand. It's what we practice in the nursery and it's quite effective. Some children don't really grasp talking until the age of 2 or older, but they can do some of the simple signs to get their point across, which is way better than pointing and grunting! Please, Thank You, Cracker/Snack, Drink, all of these are incredibly helpful.

I would also highly encourage that if you want a well-mannered child to start it now, when they are first learning, and don't wait. If you speak to them with Please and Thank You they will also learn to say it themselves. Once they grasp it you can lightly encourage it (you can't have more crackers until you say please... ). It may sound harsh, but they won't starve to death and quickly get the point that it's required.

Finally I agree with getting him on a regular eating habit. He should have 3 meals and 2-3 snacks during the day, plus fitting in an occassional bottle. If he's started not wanting his bottle you might start transitioning him over to a sippy cup or even braving a regular cup. More and more they are saying sippy's are bad for their teeth so you make that brave call for your own household :)

I'm sorry your sweet little boy is gone for now, but eventually he'll be back. I went through the same thing with my son, who is almost 5 now, and while not all the sweetness is back (they are boys after all), he's still a very affectionate nice little man.

It sounds like your son is learning from his environment...namely the one in which he spends most of his time. If he had a structured routine, he probably wouldn't behave out of character. Talk to his caregiver about maintaining his schedule for eating and sleeping. Is he doing any activities during the daytime to exercise his mind and little body to enhance the need for a nap? If he's sleeping whenever he wants to, he's not going to be on a "regular" nap schedule. If his behavior works in that environment (gets him what he needs), why wouldn't it work at home? I think his schedule is disrupted. If you don't do anything until he learns to speak in words, you'll really have a problem. He's already communicating to you. Communicate in return by your actions.

Very normal! :)
Tania was right: your little guy is finally understanding that you all communicate, so why can't you understand him? It is a very frustrating time for him because of this and the only way he can "voice" his frustration is by crying/"whining". So with this I would say, teach him some baby sign language! It helps immensely- and you'll find such joy when you see your son sign for water or a bottle or food. :)
He's probably going through a growth spurt- keep on feeding him! Grazing isn't too bad for kids- the healthiest thing for us is small meals throughout the day, and same for them. :)
Congrats on the wonderful little boy. Check out a book from the library on baby sign- you both will LOVE being able to communicate!

OMG, I'm going through almost the same thing with my 11 month old. I think the easy going personality that we fell in love with is gone forever, as she now has an opinion on everything and complains a LOT. Not exactly "throwing fits" but fake crying when we take away the remote control or cell phone. She's no longer exactly calm. And she never cried, either. What a blessing (while it lasted)! I'm mourning the loss of our sweet sunshine personality.

He'll get used to napping in a different spot. Hang in there.

Mine quit gaining weight rapidly too, so I wouldn't worry about the weight gain. But I do recommend you shape his eating schedule with 3 meals where he sits down with others and 2 or 3 snacks. He needs to know that he does get a snack between meals, so be consistent, or he'll get cranky and grab food no matter what time.

he's had a lot of changes in the past few weeks, he's spending time with a 2y.o.!! Of course, you're going to notice changes!

That said, there are some things you can work on: he should be eating regularly-timed meals. Do not allow him to develop the habit of munching on whatever he wants, whenever he wants it. That's how you create a spoiled child.

As a daycare provider, one of my pet peeves are parents who allow their children to eat from the parents' plates, without enforcing the rule of sitting down to eat a meal.....the kids just graze from Mom/Dad's plates. The flip of this ....is when the child is at my house....it is not allowed, the child has to sit down at the table, & eat only from their own plate. This is not only "my rule", but also mandatory for all facilities/schools/etc. So my ?? would be: why not teach your child proper table manners from the very beginning? !!

With your son at 10 months, he is quite capable of maintaining a schedule of: breakfast, morning snack, lunch, afternoon snack, dinner, & a bedtime snack if needed. By instituting a schedule such as this, you will be able to wean him from the bottle much easier! Simply substitute a cup at those meal times....& keep those snacktimes healthy.

As for the whining/freakouts: he's with a 2 y.o. How does she behave, how does your sis handle it? Your son is at the beginning of communication skills.....make sure what he's exposed to does not create problems!

AND, I am not a fan of signing....take that same amount of time & teach your child to talk! You're going to have to do it anyway.....so why not start right off the bat? I "talk" my way thru each & every day with the children. It's easy, it's simple, & it's going to have to happen anyway! What would you prefer: an 18 month old who can easily communicate his thoughts with everyone.....or a 18 month old who's still signing & only you & those closest to you can decipher his needs? Simply "say" each word, make it noninvasive....& he'll pick up the vocabulary! I do this with everything: diaper changes, dressing, playing w/ toys....every single thing we do is "said"....the child tries to repeat the word....& we move on. That's how you end up with children with astounding vocabs!

Now for naps: at 10 months, he should be taking a nap in the AM & afternoon. He may also require another nap around dinnertime....but every child is different on that. My kids never needed that last nap after about 5-6 months.

Soooo, what's his schedule at your sister's? She needs to set this in place & not deviate from the schedule. The 2.y.o. in her care will only require the afternoon nap, which should be coordinated with your son's. In my daycare, I have a 5 month old, an 18 month old, & 2 other girls who are between almost 3 & at 3 y.o. The 5 month old takes a morning nap, & then sleeps again when the other 3 children go down. I love this schedule!

It seems to me what's missing or what needs to be in place is an agreed-upon schedule, "like" parenting skills, & your sister taking charge of all in her care. This then will reflect back into your home. & at home, you need to take charge of your son....get him on a feeding schedule & teach him beginning words. By the 1st year, children are able to say a handful of words & are able to grasp the meaning of a whole bucketful of others!

i would say it is something to do with his day care

Hi Jen,
First, you baby sounds *so* normal with the new behaviors (more crying / demanding, etc). Both my boys went suddenly from sweeties to, "hey, mama, i know what i want, why don't you understand me???" Now is a good time to begin Baby-sign training.

Second, both my boys were on feeding scheduled from when they were a week old, so, in my opinion, you 10 mo old is not too young for an eating/snack schedule. He's probably going through a growth-spurt (which could take place is a baby's *brain* just as much as you might see in their body-size), so keep plenty of healthy food coming: but you won't hurt him by scheduling it out so he doesn't become a "grazer."

Good luck!
t