Judging a Person by the Type of Car They Drive = Just Curious

Updated on January 11, 2011
L.D. asks from Newport Beach, CA
78 answers

Just out of curiosity do you judge a person by the kind of car they drive? I live in an affluent neighborhood and most of the ladies drive BMW, Jaguar, Mercedes, Lexus, Escalades, etc.

I’m the only Mom who drives a truck around here. It’s a black Ford F150, 2006 and I love it.
It’s a 4-door with a huge roomy back seat and I keep it very clean (on the outside anyway HAHA) Never fails though that a woman/Mom just HAS to comment on it. This past weekend I was in the long line at the grocery store. I was with my kids and the Mom behind me had her kids. We started chatting about how busy they keep us and it’s awesome how they always keep us guessing. She complimented me on my hair and asked who my hairdresser was and even asked where I bought my “fabulous jeans”…. She was just really super nice until….

As I’m putting my groceries away, she walked out at that time, saw my truck and said “That must be hard driving that thing! Is your car in the shop?” Me= No this is mine. She said “Are you kidding me. I figured it was your husband’s!!” rolled her eyes and kept walking away as if now I have a deadly disease. Actually it’s not hard for me to drive at all! I’m pretty slender but I’m also 5’8”.

Honestly this kind of stuff has happens to me several times.

It’s really started to bother me to the point that I told my husband I want a new car. Sniff sniff (LOL) Our truck is paid off so that wouldn’t make any sense of course. I’m a very down to earth type of person and I am just all around friendly to everyone regardless of what a person drives. I know people around here can be stuck up but turning your nose up at me because of my car??

It’s disappointing to say the least. I chose this neighborhood because of the award winning schools and the circle of friends/neighbors I have are like me, down to earth and always friendly.

What is your take on this?? Are these women stereotyping me? What do you think of a woman driving a big truck?

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So What Happened?

AWWWW thank you ladies! You're all so awesome!

I'm happy to hear from those that commented on what you think of a woman driving a truck! It made me feel better knowing that you see her as strong, independent & "HOT"! LOL

Also I appreciate you sharing your stories. I'm not going to let it bother me when someone judges me on my material possessions!

I love my truck and I'm going to keep it!!

Thanks again!!!

Featured Answers

B.S.

answers from Saginaw on

I think anyone who judges somebody by the type of car they drive, how they look or any other material way......are not worthy of being friends with.

Let the comment go....and keep driving the truck you love!

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

You write "I chose this neighborhood because of the award winning schools and the circle of friends/neighbors I have are like me, down to earth and always friendly." Well the schools might be award winning but I don't think the neighbors are like you at all!
I think you're spending a lot of time worrying about what others think and honestly--who cares WHAT anyone drives?
I've driven a Mustang, a Grand Prix, a Sable, an Explorer, and a Cadillac Seville and I don't think I've ever had a friend comment on my vehicle! Nor would I care if they did. I think I'd like an F-150......hmmmmmmm.....

6 moms found this helpful

P.L.

answers from Chicago on

I would actually enjoy the shock factor..I by second hand and always get compliments on my cloths, always tell them is second hand...
I so don't care what people think of me, drive that car....don't care what they think or if they walk away.
I do love down to earth people so much more.They are a lot of rich and famous people who love their trucks....
And you never know what is going on in these people's live, who knows, maybe they drive a fancy car, but the husband is cheating all the time and what not.They need that car to make them feel better...:)

5 moms found this helpful

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A.R.

answers from Dallas on

Move to TX, everyone here drives trucks :)

11 moms found this helpful
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S.O.

answers from San Antonio on

People who judge you by your car (or truck) or your clothes, etc.... are just like the high school girls you went to school with. Shallow and self-centered.

9 moms found this helpful
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P.O.

answers from Harrisburg on

It is cool!...Shows your tough, rough and can handle the open road, shows a woman of power. I guess the neighborhood you are in have prissy women and that's not lady like. But I also think it's natural to judge someone by the car they drive. It shows status, financial and otherwise, it puts you in a certain class and they judge it based on personality. It is funny though, I've seen a large person and expect them to drive a big car/truck, then come to find out they drive a miata (lol) or some other miniature car, then my first guess is how do they fit into it, they think they are young, they seem to be flashy, etc etc., or I would see a young kid who drives a mercedes and wonder how did they afford that, who is paying, must be a spoiled rich kid. So yeah, I could see where that mother judged you in that neighborhood as not being ladylike because women are not supposed to show power or being in control of men (appearance that is)...Personally I think it's cool to be a tiny person and step into a large truck and just drive...and to step down and look cute and lady like makes it even better..lol..I would not change the truck...but I guess if you want to not have them cause you stress, you do as the romans do.

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

People who judge you by your car are crappy people, not to put it nicely. Seriously, the woman who was nice till she saw your truck is like the prissy mean girl in high school. Who needs that. If you have a circle of friends, stick with them. Some people are superficial and phony.

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T.N.

answers from Albany on

A Girl And Her Truck Is a Beautiful Thang!! :)

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M.K.

answers from Kansas City on

Are they sterotyping you? YES!!!

My dad, years ago, walked into Monkey Wards with 5000.00 cash in pocket to buy jewelry for my mom for Christmas. He was wearing overalls as that is what he is most comfy in. The lady behind the counter ignored him and helped some guy in a suit. The manager came over and asked if my dad had been helped. He said no and the manager asked the lady to help him. She rolled her eyes and got fired on the spot.

I'll never forget that day. I was young and didn't fully understand what was going on but when I realized a couple of years later, it really burned me up! For that reason alone, I never judge by things like that. Cars. clothes, accessories. I really try to make those judgments on personality and character.

I am a big truck girl. My hubby met me driving a full size, long bed metallic purple and silver Dodge Ram. I was 21 years old and in the military, as was he. Things have changed a lot in the last 10 years. We both got out. I stay at home with our three kids. We live in an affluent neighborhood and he makes six figures. He wears long sleeve tshirts, shorts and a baseball cap year round. Slicky pants if he has to. He wears suits to the office and he'll be damed if he's wearing anything he deems as uncomfortable just because the neighbors look down on us for it (and some of them do.). I have two pairs of jeans. We drive paid off cars. We don't flaunt the little bit of money we have left after paying for our earlier 'put us in serious debt' mistakes. As such, we seem to be the pahrhyia of the neigborhood, but that's okay!

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V.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

O.K. don't judge me but I also drive a Ford F-150, black but mine is a 2003!! LOL!! I've never really noticed if anyone gives me strange looks because of it but I see women around my city (not far from you!) driving trucks. Sure it's not so common and like your neighborhood most women drive nice luxury cars. My closest friends/neighbors drive luxury cars and they couldn't give a hoot that I drive a truck! Although I do get a great laugh, and so do they, watching them try to climb up into the seat!

IMO I feel sorry for those that judge based on the type of vehicle you drive or for any other reason.

You drive your truck with pride girl!!!

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L.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi L.,
I live in Orange County, too. Born and raised here. I'm what you'd consider a "down to Earth" type of person, too. I drive a 2000 Toyota Sienna or a 1996 Lexus. I'm the type that went on a backpacking trip in Costa Rica with my husband and camped on the sand. Then we stayed in a luxury resort at the end of the trip ;) ... I really couldn't care less what people think of me if they are judging me by my older, paid-off vehicles. Personally, I think people sniffing about your truck, as they drive off in their leased Mercedes, aren't worth another thought. You would consider buying a different vehicle just so the Newport faux-elites won't turn their rhinoplasty-enhanced noses up at you? I learned long ago not to worry what people like that think of me or my material possessions.

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A.S.

answers from Denver on

As long as you like what you drive, who cares what anyone else thinks???? (Unless you're a realtor:))

I have an Audi, but it was the cheapest station wagon on the market in the used range. I spent 15K on Craigslist, see previous post, and the Subaru wagons, for similar miles were 22-23K. Even VW's were 17-18K. So, yes, it's an Audi, but it's got lots of miles now and it was CHEAP!

And just like you don't like being judged for driving a truck. I **hate** it when people assume I have money growing on trees in my backyard just because it's a "luxury" car.

As far as what I think of women buying trucks, it's damn practical, and I love practical :)

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A.C.

answers from Dallas on

That is absolutely bizarre. I wouldn't want to be friends with someone who would discount me (or anyone else!) because of the car I drive. We live in a nice area too, and my car is not expensive, but it is paid for and I take care of it, it's clean, etc. We may not have the cool car of the moment, but it runs good, I think it's cute, and I'm not in debt or stress like some of my neighbors are!
I used to drive an F150 and they are good trucks! I had a great job as an inspector in industrial construction, making a lot of money, and the truck was not only nice, but I didn't have to worry about getting stuck or hurting it on rough terrain that I had to drive over, and I could easily carry containers of concrete samples or whatever I needed in the back without worrying about ruining the interior of a car. It was also fun. I liked being high up off the road (high for me, I'm 5'2"). It was perfect for me. I would view someone in Newport Beach as being (possibly) easily approachable, fun, and a bit independent, and in your setting, not afraid to be noticed--all good things. I would not think badly of a stranger in a BMW just from what car they drive (it's a lovely car) but I wouldn't think anything at all of their vehicle. It's the car that blends in and doesn't want to stand out, in that community. You'd notice it more in a setting where that car wasn't the norm.

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L.G.

answers from Austin on

I live in Texas and the summers here are brutal.......I'd rather drive a Hyundai with air-conditioning than a Jaguar or Mercedes without it. ;)

Its not about the vehicle, its about the person driving. She sounds shallow and obnoxious. Let it go, its her loss.

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C.S.

answers from Jacksonville on

If you love your truck ,don't be as shallow and materialistic as these other women in your neighborhood. The Vehicle does not a woman make, They can drive their Mercedes' , Rolls' and Benz' , they aren't any better than you are, so who cares if they are that shallow. If you enjoy driving it, keep it ! If they want to turn their noses up at you for what you drive, thier loss , not yours, who wants friends like that anyway ? DRIVING A BIG TRUCK JUST MEANS YOU'RE STRONG AND INDEPENDANT ! I would imagine these women probably don't know that much about that kind of independance, they rely on their hubbies for everything,...... and it doesn't say much about them to criticize others for what they drive , reminds me of the movie'Stepford Wives' lol. Ignore them and be who you really are ! C. S.

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K.I.

answers from Seattle on

Who cares! I mean really! I dont think about it one way or another!

What a silly thing to worry/think about.

Don't let it bother you.

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C.F.

answers from Boston on

Chicks who drive Trucks are HOT :-) those snobby mama's arent worth your time! If it gets to from Point A to Point B - who the heck cares??

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S.G.

answers from Oklahoma City on

i love seeing a woman in a truck, she was just being snooty...maybe it's the complete opposite of what you think, maybe she got rude because she can't afford one and is jealous...i think a woman who looks good and drives a full size truck can be hot :) but that's just my opinion

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C.K.

answers from Chicago on

F150 is cool. I am a pregnant but would drive a truck for sure. More options
It sucks gas, but you can do so much more with it. Fun adventures, vs you are limited with a Mercedes, BMW, etc

It is personal preference, if you like it, own it! Be proud of what you have and understand everyone has different likes and dislikes.

But in general your car does not define a person, it is your actions in life on a daily basis that defines a person.

I have owned, mistubishi, porche, Toyota, Dodge Ram (w/ Hemi) a vehicle is a means of transportation.

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M.L.

answers from Colorado Springs on

I wonder what your neighbors would think of me. I drive a 1997 Dodge minivan with very high mileage and little visual appeal. They might not want me in the area!

I've only driven a big truck once in my life, and since then I've admired anyone who can do it. I was scared to death trying to drive that thing! I probably could have become comfortable with it in time, but it wasn't my truck. Maybe this woman was just astounded - not polite, certainly, but not intending to hurt you.

Don't worry about people who aren't worth worrying about. Be friendly and helpful to everyone (even the snobs) and if some folks have a problem with your vehicle, let it be THEIR problem, not yours. Be thankful your neighborhood also has women who judge folks by their characters rather than their cars.

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K.D.

answers from Dallas on

Some people are way too concerned with what other people think, that woman was probably jealous that shes not brave enough to drive a truck in a neighborhood like that. SHEESH big deal!

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J.B.

answers from Atlanta on

If your circle of friends and neighbors are down to earth and friendly, I wouldn't worry about it. Since I wasn't there and didn't hear her tone, I really don't know, but I think you may be a bit sensitive regarding your interaction with this woman at the grocery store. To me, it just sounds like, "OH -I assumed it was your husband's!" -So what? No biggie. Evidently the people you feel are judging you aren't your close friends (neither do the need to be). I wouldn't worry about it. Drive what you want!

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B.

answers from Augusta on

I'd love a truck but right now we need the inside area for the pets when we travel.
They bought their cars b/c of some kind of status symbol , you bought yours because it was practical. I would ignore them.
I agree with the PP that said driving a truck means you're strong and independent. I've never seen the purpose of driving a " luxury car".

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R.D.

answers from Kansas City on

Yes, they are stereotyping, and you shouldn't pay them any attention! You have friends outside the neighborhood, so don't worry about them or their opinions. Who do you think they will want to buddy up to when they need something moved?

I used to own a 2002 Ford F-150 4X4 Supercab Lariat in Dark Highlander Green with tan leather seats and a Rhino liner - and loved it! It had automatic everything - sun/moon roof, windows, pedal adjustments, back window slide, powered heated seats (with lumbar support), power locks and driver side keypad - you name it! The only thing missing was an automatic start button! :) If anyone shunned me, I never noticed. I am sure people thought it looked like a "man's" truck, but I didn't care. It was mine and I was happy with it.

If it were me (now), I would trade it in for a smaller car that would also be fully paid for, but not because of the comments and looks - I would be looking for better gas mileage! That's the one thing I do not miss about by big, beautiful truck - the gasoline bill. In this economy, I can find many more worthy things to spend my money on.

What it boils down to is this: DO WHAT YOU WANT!! :)
(Sorry this post is so long just to say that!)

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

The only time I ever judge someone by their car is when it's a SUV that will never leave the blacktop. Hummers in particular.

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P.R.

answers from Cleveland on

I think people gravitate towards people who are like them because it's often easier to be friends with someone you have a lot in common with. So if you were driving the truck and just completely different than all the other moms, it likely would be hard to make friends. Everyone should still be nice to you of course but they may not go out of their way to become friends. But if otherwise, you have a lot in common with these mothers (ie: she likes your haircut, jeans etc) and the fact that you drive a truck is an issue, that's ridiculous. But end of day, you do have to decide if your truck is worth if it it's going to make it harder for you to make friends... You mention having a good circle so if you do, then who cares? But if you really want or need to make more friends, maybe switch cars but also accept the women who will now be friendlier probably aren't going to be true friends in the long term.

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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

Well...I don't think it is necessarily the truck. It goes both ways. I drive one of the 'other' cars you mention, and people automatically think I'm a snob (which is funny because I wear t-shirts and shorts to work, rarely wear make-up, and have a simple hairstyle!).

If people want to judge you because of your car then that's their business even if it is pathetic. But...you have the option of letting their comments get to you so it is up to you as to how you react.

Edited - and as you can see with the other posts here...those who drive so-called luxury vehicles get the business too. Just like it isn't okay to stereotype a woman who drives a truck, it also isn't okay to stereotype those who drive a luxury vehicle as prissy or snooty. Ladies, it's the same thing!

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K.B.

answers from Tulsa on

Hi. I live in THE upper income neighborhood because we needed a wheelchair accessible house and this is where we could build. Here many drive trucks and suvs and vans. The doctor with the BMW560 whose lawyer wife drives a Mercedes are the exception. When she dinged his car, the fight spilled outside and neighbors had to intervene. It was the most ridiculous thing.

Here no one would notice and many might ask you to use your truck on occasion or if you could pick something up for them. The only people I know of concerned with cars, who make comments about others, are the couple I mentioned. They are the worst neighbors who have to be written up to keep their yard mowed, but they talk about people. They are very insecure, telling all of us how much they paid for their house and car. People frankly think they have issues and avoid them. I am serious. No neighbors invite them out more than once.

I know here they might overlook the truck, but they would judge you for other reasons. Being nice to everyone is especially repulsive to the meanies here. :0)

59 ANSWERS...WOW!

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E.M.

answers from Johnstown on

KEEP THE TRUCK!!!! I can't tell you the number of times I have depressed myself when I think of the truck we had, but ended up selling (a '96 F250 extended cab long bed--HUGE, but LOVED IT!!!!!). The '06 is the newest body style and is very classy. I personally would rather see a woman driving a pickup than a teeny tiny lil sportscar just because it looks good. Atleast I know a woman with a truck is willing to haul her kids to and from sports practice without worrying about what their uniforms and gear will do to the inside of the car.

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E.G.

answers from Atlanta on

Well, you know the old adage .... big trucks mean big feet. Big feet mean ..... uhm, wait, nevermind!

To the horse's butt at the grocery store, if you see her again, ask her this: "OMG, who did your eyes? You did just do them, right? Didn't you? OMG, I am SOOOO sorry. I saw the swelling, and, I, uh, I thought ..... OMG, I am SO sorry!"

Cheers!

E.

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T.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I say let your car be your friend filter. Those people who judge you because of your truck aren't worth knowing in the first place. So keep the car if it's paid off because not one of those materialistic divas is going to pay the car payment for you when you invest in a car you don't need. I lived in a snotty neighborhood with a less than favorable car myself for years. It was also paid off. I never "upgraded" or changed my way of living to suit anyone else. YES, I am human, at times I was a little embarrassed, but I kept telling myself what I would tell my kids if they were in a similar situation: If everyone else jumps off a cliff..would you? Just be you and you will attract the "right" people. Your car is is a snob repellent..lol which is a good thing. Good luck!

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J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

I am a woman who was raised driving trucks. Thats how my dad taught me to drive, and we lived on a farm where no BMW or Mercedes would last. If I saw you I would think "cool truck" (I like fords). In fact my boyfriend and I even talked about getting one in the future. I can drive his friends truck, better then he can. I am more comfortable in big vehicles then small ones. My aunt would tell you the same thing, she's had a truck forever.
I have had people stereotype me and make comments (when I wold drive my dads truck as a teen) and I would just respond with..."my car is bigger then yours....don't try to cut me off on the road." It usualy shut them up.
Enjoy your truck, ignore the ignorant people. =)

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A.S.

answers from Boca Raton on

I don't care what people think of my completely paid-for, never-had-a-loan minivan.

And I live in one of the snootiest areas of the country . . .

DON'T LAUGH - IT'S PAID FOR! :P

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K.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

*I* think you sound like a fantastic person and the truck thing, well....that just makes you "Da Bomb" in my book! :-)

Pay no mind to those women, girl....they're just jealous!

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B.B.

answers from New York on

I do judge a bit, but in the opposite way I think. When I see people driving BMWs and Mercades I am like...really, is that necessary!

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A.H.

answers from San Francisco on

Sometimes other women are trying to see if they can shake your confidence. If you love your truck own it: say it loud and proud! It just might be the way to get past this situation.

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J.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

You go girl!!! I miss my truck!! Sounds like they may be being petty. Don't let go of your truck if you love it! That is what is important.

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N.B.

answers from San Diego on

I sometimes fall into that trap, and then I realize that most of those people probably are in credit debt. I have a paid off CRV and every month I stick that "car payment" in my daughters college fund. Most of the parents at my daughter's private school drive the BMW's, so I can totally relate. :)

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T.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

I didn't read all the answers, but since you live in Newps, take up surfing, and then you'll really have a great reason to be driving that truck :) You need it for the boards, LOL!
Seriously, I WISH I had a truck, it would be so nice just to throw everything in the back when we are on the way to soccer, baseball, hockey, etc.
I DO surf and teach surfing, and we have to deal with racks on the cars instead, since we don't have a truck :(

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J.B.

answers from Houston on

Oh my, what would then think of me!!! I drive 2001 Honda Odyssey Minivan!!! I would be kicked to the curb for sure:) But hey, we live debt free and bought a van for cash to accommodate our growing family:) To me your truck sounds really nice!! I think driving a paid for vehicle that you actually love and is relatively new is so smart and hey smart is sexy in my book!!! Go girl:)

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K.K.

answers from San Diego on

Hello, I live in east San Diego county. There are all kinds of people here. Some own ranches, some live in family neighborhoods. The school where my grandsons' have attended as well as their middle school and high school are full of all kinds of vehicles. I have found that there are some people who are so insecure that they will try to act like they are better than other people. There are a lot of trucks out here. There are also BIG SUVs. There are also compact vehicles. I try to not let the ones with the attitude ruin my days. Their insecurities are just that, theirs.
You shouldn't be judged by the vehicle you drive, the clothes you wear, the house you live in. It should matter how you live your life. If you go through life doing good and being kind, then you are richer than anyone who would judge you by your truck.
Good luck with your precious family.
K. K.

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M.C.

answers from Detroit on

Yep, they are stereotyping you...too bad for them. They are shallow and cannot think outside the box. Personally, I'd rather drive a truck than a fancy car--here in the metro Detroit area you run the risk of getting carjacked if you drive a fancy car. I'll stick with my Jeep, thank you:)

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T.C.

answers from Chicago on

Yes, they are stereotyping! Don't let it bother you. One cannot judge someone based on their car...I have known people in debt up to their ears who drive very expensive cars....I know someone who bought a used luxury car when he really cannot afford one. Some people are so insecure about themselves that they think they need to show other people how much they have...or pretend to have. We have an 11 1/2 yr. old car in great condition, it's been paid off for years & years!!! It has 175,000 miles. I'm proud my husband is fine driving it when we could really afford something much, much nicer. It says something about you that you drive an awesome truck (hubbie used to have a big pick up truck, I loved it) & don't try to impress your neighbors with something like a Lexus. These women know they have insecurity issues & know you are confident & strong...that's why they may make comments. My neighborhood is like yours...bmw, lexus, mercedes, jaguar...I just wonder what people think about our older car, but I really don't care! Good for you!

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N.H.

answers from Peoria on

Ya know what...I got nothing but compliments on my Chevy Work Truck (full size, basic truck) but BOY I LUVED LUVED LUVED my truck! Strangers wud come up to me & tell me how beautiful my truck was & how awesome it was that a girl, at the time before kids was slender 'good looking gal', was driving a big ole truck like that so ya know what, they're prob just jealous that you have sucha handy vehicle. Don't think nothing of it. Just be yourself & if yourself isn't good enuf for them, strangers even, then they don't need to be talking to you. You have a vehicle that's awesome, VERY practical & useable for most any job & you love it so phooey on them. So what if they have fancy cars...can they haul things w/it...not really. I'd like to see THEM hauling a 7' Christmas tree in their car...they may be calling YOU to haul it for them, who knows but I wudn't worry abt their opinions. You don't hafta answer to them. ;) From one truck gal to another, IMO, you got the better of the two.

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T.C.

answers from Colorado Springs on

I think it is shallow to judge someone based on anything material. Seriously? I love my car. It suits our lifestyle and needs. I drive a 15 passenger van. :) Honestly, if anyone cares about what I drive I would be flabergasted. Why would anyone care what I drive? I'm not making them drive it. And, I guess I'm secure enough in what I believe in and how we live that it is a joke to me if someone thinks they are somehow better or something because of my vehicle. Just determine that you live how you live, and it is not open for debate with others. And, be positive when others comment on it. Express how much you love driving it, etc. If you seem to waffle, it gives them more power over you. Yuck.

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M.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

My gut reaction is - would you want these women as friends anyway?? I hope not.

Before becoming a stay a home Mom, I worked in the auto business. Most recently for Mercedes. Most of these people could not afford what they were driving. Who cares! Drive what makes the most sense for your family! Don't waste your energy on these Mom's - so not worth it!

A little background on me. My husband would buy me whatever I want. BMW, Mercedes, Audi - you name it. Too pretentious for me, plus I LOVE my mini-van. Lately, I can tell he wants a truck (wants it to to tow/haul stuff). I've already told him - buy whatever you want. I don't care and thankfully - my friends don't either.

You'll find happiness hanging around people who don't care about what kind of car you drive or what kind of jeans you are wearing... there is more to life. :-)

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A.H.

answers from San Diego on

I would quit letting it bother you. If you love your truck and it's paid for, why replace it? If you want a new car, for you, then no problem. But if you want a new car because of some snooty women, then I say there's a problem. Those women have the problem. Besides what makes them so special? They all drive the same cars. At least you're original. Who cares what they think anyway? I think they're just jealous that they can't drive an awsome truck like yours. We'll be getting one soon and I can't wait!

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G.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

OK!!! Too funny... First, I will do exactly what I "clicked in" to do, tell you a story about my childhood, (then I'll tell you the punchline!)
When I was a little girl my family moved into a wonderful area, full of affluent families. I changed schools in second grade and all of the clicky little rich kids were mean to me. They excluded me from becoming to close with them and even the boys, whom I seemed to get along with better, eventually turned me away. I went to school there for two years then entered private school where the kids were richer, treated me MORE poorly and the education was excellent...
I went back to high school with all of those kids that I went to second - fourth with and they were much better. Some girls were still the same but the guys let me in on a little secret. Back in those early days the girls (and I quote) wouldn't let them hang around me because I was "too pretty". GREAT!!! My childhood was lonely because of THAT (something that meant little to me, then and now)!
Punchline? Well, since I'm 40, those little b**ches are your neighbors! The schools were in Corona Del Mar and if your over in the Newport Harbor district, you've got it even worse! I couldn't see that you were in Newport until I "clicked in" through the email onto the website.
Drive the truck and stay cool! They're just jealous and they'll never be your friends unless you become as worthless and shallow as them, which may be challenging for you because it sounds like you may have riches that they do not possess...a richness of character!!!
I was a beautiful place to be a child and I would never suggest that you leave but teach your children well, about people and money. Money cannot buy class and poise and grace...that is evident, so it should be easy to show them examples. Money can buy some awesome drugs and alcohol, which is why 85% of those people I went to school with got out of control and are now and forever "recovering".
My mother and father taught me that ugly behavior of all kinds is what makes a person truly ugly and undesirable. A very valuable lesson!

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

I Drove a Red Dodge Ram for years.. We still have it and I LOVE it. I am a short overweight woman and I loved being up high and able to see over everyone else.. Of course living in Texas.. women and trucks, just go together..

Also as a PTA pres.. In charge of carnivals, Auctions and all sorts of things.. I did not have to ask for help, We would load up my truck and go...

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W.K.

answers from Washington DC on

I used to drive my husband's F-150 supercrew in San Diego and got lots of stares [I'm a 4'11" Asian girl], and I always assumed they were amused in a positive way. If not, oh well. My favorite features were the seats that could raise and the gas pedal that could move closer to me. Great truck. Saved me and my unborn baby's life... RIP big green monster truck.

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J.L.

answers from Anchorage on

LOL You should drive through there grass n leave big ol' tire marks... and then ask them can your car do that?! LOL No don't do that but it sure would be funny!! People prolly do stereotype because of the car they drive!! You shouldn't let it bug you! If they want you rollin in sumthin that they think is nicer than they can buy you one until then it's sexy to see a chick driving a truck!

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C.R.

answers from Dallas on

Why are you letting this bother you? If these women are judging you by the type of vehicle you drive then they aren't worth getting upset over. Be proud of driving a big, paid off truck. Don't let these snobs get you down!

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C.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

To begin with, of course people judge you by superficial things like the car you drive. People (including yourself) size people up by the way they are dressed, the way they act, the way they talk, and the things they own. For some reason, we seem to put a lot of importance on the things people own. (eye roll) The difference is what you do with that information once you assess it.
I think big trucks are awesome. I love big trucks. The bigger, the better. I think women look cool driving big trucks. Unfortunately, a lot of people (like my mother) think it makes you look like "white trash." What-ever!! Your vehicle doesn't make you a complete person, or ruin the person you are. If your truck is paid for, you like it, and it suits your families needs, these other superficial ladies can pound sand. :) Don't give in to peer pressure to purchase an expensive car that you don't need just because people eyeball you funny in a grocery store parking lot. Those people aren't the kind of people you want as friends anyway. :)

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T.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

You should see all the high end cars people drive in my kids' school but you better believe that a significant number of those Mercedes, BMW, Escalade, and Range Rover moms don't write a single check for school fundraising. My take is that any joe shmoe can drive a Mercedes, today. It wasn't like that 20 yrs ago. Go ahead, girl! Be yourself! Who cares what grocery store mom thought of you after spying your truck. It's just too bad that you told her who your hairdresser was and where you bought your jeans! Dumb Beetch!

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S.O.

answers from San Diego on

I say "Who Cares What they think"? If the other people in your neighborhood have a problem with you and what you drive...that's their problem.

And just because they have all the nice things...you don't know the real story. They could be horrible people. They could be up to their eyes in debt and can't get out of it. Just like they shouldn't judge you by what you drive...it doesn't mean that because they drive a nice car that they have it all together either.

I lived in a very affluent neighborhood before. Nice people, but not really all that friendly. I now live in a very old section of an affluent area and LOVE IT! Our neighbors are great...and we actually talk to each other on a regular basis and our kids play together all the time. We watch out for everyone's houses and kids. Call each other if things seem out of the ordinary. Bring over meals if someone is sick. Offer to babysit each others kids, etc. And my friends who live in more affluent neighborhoods always ask me why I choose to live in such a "poor" neighborhood. My answer always is because
1- I am happy with where we are.
2- We have awesome neighbors
3- best school district in the county
4- convenient to all amenities
and 5- I am happy with where we are!

And then I stick this into the conversation. They think that only poor people live in our neighborhood. I say, just because the houses aren't brand new and are a little run down, doesn't mean the people living there are poor. My hubby and I have our Masters Degree and I know my hubby makes almost double what her hubby makes. My friend across the street is a SAHM with a PhD in Biochemistry and her hubby is a corporate attorney. Our next door neighbor is a CPA and her hubby is in Marketing. Pretty much everyone on our half of the block has their education and has a job making decent money.

There are just some people who only look on the outside and material things. I try my best not to be one of those people. I really don't care what others outside of my immediate circle say about what I do, what I wear, etc.

So I say drive your beloved truck and drive it with pride. Plus you know that "those Moms" kids probably think you are the cool Mom driving the cool truck around town and probably tell their Moms so. So those Moms are probably just jealous of you.

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E.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

I know it happens, but I would get a license plate frame or sticker made that says something like. "don't be jealous because you can't handle this vehicle -its just my style" or "I drive a truck and love it - if you can't handle it go hide behind your brand name vehicle" or "This is not my husband's truck, its mine and I love the ride" or "judge me by my truck, I dare you" ~ there are so many things you can say if you feel the need to get it our. However you deal with it, good luck, I hope there are some realistic folks in your area who won't judge you by their perception of what you should drive!!

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S.R.

answers from McAllen on

I drive a 2000 malibu, my husband has asked me to replace it for several years, but I really like the car, and I don't want to give it up (for sentimental reasons, maybe) I like in a nice townhouse complex and you can see everything from recent BMWs & mercedes to really old ones or work vans like my husbands.
I think people will judge other based on anything, because its always easi to look at others' problems than our own, but does that mean you have to change, everyone will always be stereotyped one way or another, you have no idea how many people have thought that I am my son's babysitter, only because hes white and blond like his dad and I look latino (ironically he is from Mexico jajajajaja) but still, if you chose your truck because you like it, that's cool, i say keep it, until you no longer love it!!!

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L.L.

answers from Topeka on

I have an 11 yr old car Olds Intrigue 4 door it is paid off hate to think about buying a new car..My hubby has a huge truck I get to drive every now & then well when I want to or need to but HATE to i'm short & driving it I feels like i'm going to run someone over.But when I do get in it guy's look they do,I was asked if that were mine a few times well it is in away..

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

.

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D.G.

answers from Jacksonville on

Lol just be yourself, don't worry about that woman or any other woman for that matter. I've always wanted big vechicals ( chevy avalanche, ford excursion) even as a teenager. I'm only 5'6 125lbs my mom and dad where both like you don't need that big of a vehical you one little person blah blah blah :) Be youself, if you live in a nice neighborhood and drive a nice big pickup truck so what, do you. At least you and your husband aren't "keeping with the Jones' ". Good luck and keep that truck ;)

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C.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

I drive a dirty mini van. so, i am lamer. my husband has a truck and I hate driving it. it's bumby, and hard to park. but, who cares what you drive?

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D.S.

answers from Houston on

I drive a big truck and laugh at the people who act like that. really want to trip them out jack it up put a 4' lift and everyone will tell you that is not a womans truck:) woman power. us rednecks dont care if other women think we should drive a car. I feel empowered in a truck and hate cars.

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S.E.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi There,
I know you already got a lot of answers but here are my two cents - best vehicle - paid off (whatever it is). Say a silent thank you whenever you meet these people. She did you a favor by not wanting to be your "friend" because of what you drive. People who make things like that more important than the relationship or the person are never your true friends and only succeed in bringing drama into your life. You are setting a great example for your kids by teaching them about the riches that money can't buy. Whoo hoo for you!

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L.M.

answers from Boston on

Love it! I drove a 1993 with 200+ miles which had been paid off for years. It was super reliable and my friends and co-workers all gave me a hard time about it. It was paid off and how silly to buy a new car and have to make payments. My goal was to be in the Toyota commercial until one day I was in an accident totaling my dear car. I was so upset. I now drive a new SUV (have two babies now) and make payments monthly (ugh). My husband drives an old Buick which we bought a couple years ago. Our neighbors all have fancy cars not to mention every gadget. If we all try to keep up with the Jones' (many can't afford the things they have) the economy will continue to be a mess. Drive what you want and be confident doing it. I wish I still had my Corolla :)

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J.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

Where do you live in Newport Beach? i never want to go there. What is wrong with a girl who drives a truck? Have you ever seen the bumper sticker "silly boys, trucks are for girls". Shame on those women who are judging you for your choice in automobile. I used to drive a 2003 Expedition now its my husbands, I now have a 2004 Freestar van, and i love it. It's easy for me to say don't pay any attention to what they say or think, but just know that they are a sad sorry excuse to act that way. I have a 15 yr. old daughter who is moderatly Autistic, lets see what they have to say about that.

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A.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

My sisters and Mom drive big trucks. When asked why by their friends they tell them "nothing is sexier than all that power at your fingertips". They call all the sports cars "Barbie cars" and point out that with kids it's easier to haul all their sports equipment and junk around.

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M.C.

answers from Honolulu on

I think I have more of a tendency to "reverse stereotype" regarding cars. I drive a honda odyssey van, which is just a generic family car. I bought it used and it is getting old (2004) so it will probably fall more into the category of your truck. But anyway, whenever I see a BMW, Mercedes, etc (and there are lots of them because our kids go to an expensive private school that we can barely afford) I always think "there must be a snob with a boob job picking up her kids!" It really isn't fair of me, I guess, because if you have plenty of money, I guess you have a right to get whatever car makes you happy, and just because you have money doesn't make you a snob, right? I really should probably be more open minded. Just drive your car and be proud of who you are. That is the most important thing!

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M.R.

answers from Phoenix on

I sooo knew that when I read the question, it was coming from Southern California....I have lived all over the country, including other countries....We lived right there on Brain Hill at UCI, my eldest daughter attended Corona del Mar HS - I am sooooo glad to be away from that materialistic centered universe....that one lady in particular at the grocery store was as shallow as they come. Really, that's the depth of her conversation as to what kind of car you drive? Tells you A LOT about her priorities. Remember that contentment is the greatest form of wealth....I grew up with the mantra if it gets your from point a to point b, and it's paid for, it's all you need.

You sound like one cool, authentic gal to drive a truck. I drove a VW Vanagon pop up camper when I met my husband many moons ago and I still wish I had it. He's promising to buy me another when the kids are gone.

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D.B.

answers from San Antonio on

So happy you've chosen to keep the truck. I don't know what some people think when they see a woman driving a truck, but I can just about garantee they're idiots.

We have 2 cars now. A Toyota Corolla and a BIG 15 passenger van. We have 5 kids and when we bought it, they were all at home and we homeschooled. So I always had a load full of kids going to all kinds of places. You would not believe the reaction I got from some people about that van. Course, in the homeschool community we were a part of it was a typical car, In fact, if you were looking for a home school function, all you had to do was look for a parking lot full of vans, mostly 15 passenger ones, LOL. But mostly they asked if it were hard to drive, which surprisingly it isn't. It's a very plain van, all white, so it was often confused for a day care van, LOL.

But if I could, I'd have a truck like yours. I like that feeling of safety and being higher than most people, LOL. Not higher in social standings, but literally higher. Sometimes I feel very closed in being so far down, know what I mean?

You keep proudly driving that truck and let the Desperate Housewives get a grip.

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C.T.

answers from Los Angeles on

I drive an F350 Deisel... I am a horse gal... so a definite neccessity to drive a truck! Have you seen the prices of trucks these days? My brother used to always say if you could would you rather drive a fully loaded truck or a porche? No brainer for me... the truck of course! In college a guy friend used to tease that girls drive trucks so they don't have to worry about trivial little things like curbs! Heck why not... Trucks these days are built to ride/ drive much smoother and more comfortable = more luxury plus can handle those curbs, haul just about anything you would need, pack the kids in, and SAFE if someone hits you. Why would you want a mercedes? Not me! :)

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J.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

I think the real question is "Why do you care what these women think". Do you honestly want that sort of person for a friend? I drive pick up, live in an extremely affluent neighborhood and have never heard, nor felt a peep. Both you, and them, should get over it.

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J.L.

answers from San Diego on

L., you know what? I would not buy a new car unless you really need one, and I would proudly drive your truck. this woman (Not that I'm judging) does not sound like someone I would want to spend my time with. I would tell people who commit, I like trucks! J.

Updated

L., you know what? I would not buy a new car unless you really need one, and I would proudly drive your truck. this woman (Not that I'm judging) does not sound like someone I would want to spend my time with. I would tell people who commit, I like trucks! J.

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T.S.

answers from San Diego on

If these women are going to judge you because you drive a truck then all the money and nice cars they have didn't buy them an inch of class. I'm sorry that you've gotten this treatment, but at least it has revealed to you how superficial these moms are and you probably don't want them as friends anyway...

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E.Y.

answers from Santa Fe on

Hi, I had to laugh when I read your post because my husband has a F250, extended cab, that I drove when my car broke down. I am 5'-1". I got A LOT of comments also. I enjoyed driving his truck and it didn't bother me but it certainly did seem to bother others. I don't think there is anything wrong with a woman driving a truck and I say don't let it bother you. What really matters is if you enjoy driving it or not.

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A.W.

answers from Kalamazoo on

I drive a F150 that my kids can barely climb into. My hubby drives a nice new black VW Routon minivan. NEITHER of us care if we are sterotyped. This is what works for our family. Hubby drives ALOT for work and needs a safe, spacious and fuel economy car. I work at our home office and don't drive everyday, so I drive the truck to take the kids to practive, get groceries etc. If I go somewhere on the weekends, I often take his van. When he goes hunting, he takes my truck. No biggie!

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L.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

I grew up in an aflluent area, and as far as I recall, no one really judged anyone based on the car they drove. Many of my neighbors had the whole Midwestern "waste not, want not" mentality so it wasn't an issue. In fact, my aunt and uncle, who are extremely wealthy, drove an old Suburban around even though they had several cars, including a Porsche 911 turbo in their garage and just basically have a lot of money. I think those women must just be very superficial.

LOL, I think the whole car thing is a California thing. Back home, many had nice cars (my dad even had a Bentley and a Rolls Royce when his restaurant was doing well) but you don't drive them around all the time. Cars were an issue of practicality, horsepower, towing capacity, etc because you had snow and many had kids to tow around. Here people seem to drive giant SUV's, Escalades, etc for no apparent reason. Then again, I work and live in fairly affluent areas in Cali now, and get many compliments on my Scion, which is a FUNctional vehicle.

PS. I think your truck sounds nice:)

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A.S.

answers from Davenport on

Well, I live in farm country so seeing women in trucks is par for the course. You need a truck to haul seed, feed, to tow things, etc. I know that some people see women driving a truck and think 'I wonder why she needs a truck...what could she be hauling around?'

Personally, I love our truck. It is a 1981 Ford F-150 (older than I am). That being said, I don't drive it to the grocery store. I have a much more fuel efficient, family friendly car for that. The truck is used for truck things, the car for car things.

I agree with the previous poster, it sounds like she just thought the truck was your husband's (which isn't a stretch given that most truck drivers are male) and was surprised to find it wasn't. I doubt she really cares one way or another what a stranger with whom she shared a line in the grocery store drives. Just because one expresses surprise over something doesn't mean they are judging. But, hey, you were there not I so if you feel offended, so be it.

⊱.✿.

answers from Spokane on

I saw this link you attached to another post about SAHM's......had to check it out. CRACKS.ME.UP.
I am from Eastern WA ~ can you guess how many women/moms drive big trucks and SUV's in our area?! A LOT!
I drive a full size SUV and sometimes I even drive my husbands 3/4 ton diesel GASP!?!? :)
Love that you drive a truck and you don't let pettiness get to you!

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