Photo by: Cameron Cassan

Some Days, Parenting is... Hard

Photo by: Cameron Cassan

Some days, parenting is… hard

That was my exhausted thought as I drove my daughter home from swim team one night last week.

The whole day had been a battle.

I can’t even remember as I write this what the issues were, but it just seemed like everything was a challenge that day.

Maybe it was because we had a busy schedule and I was being impatient.

Or maybe it was because she’s almost eleven and she’s becoming more independent.

Whatever the reason, I was frustrated.

She was mad.

And it was one of those days.

So there we were, driving along, on the heels of an argument, and I was done.

I sighed.

She sighed.

I could almost hear her arms crossing in the back seat.

We were both quiet.

And in that silence, as we drove down the freeway, the sun setting in the distance, a thought came to me.

“You know what?” I said.

“What?” she answered, sulking.

“I just realized, even when we have our differences, you and I are still more the same than we are different.”

She didn’t say anything.

“And I think the fact that we disagree sometimes might be good.”

“Why?” Her voice softened.

(Was that the sound of her arms uncrossing?)

“Because I see your determination. You’ve got a strong will, and you can do a lot of great things with that in life.”

“Hmm,” was all she said.

We drove along, maybe another five minutes or so, and then…

“Mommy?”

“What?”

“I love you.”

It took me by surprise.

I smiled in the darkness.

“I love you too.”

“Thank you for taking me to swim tonight.”

I got a lump in my throat.

“You’re welcome.”

And that one moment—that glimmer of sweetness in between the day’s bickering—reminded me that even though some days, parenting is hard,

in the end,

it’s still good.

Genny lives in California with her husband and two kids, where she balances writing with motherhood and loves both. You can find her writing regularly at her blog and can read more about her books and articles at GennyHeikka.com. Follow her on twitter @GennyHeikka.

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65 Comments

Thank you for writing this posting. It has encouraged me to understand that I am not alone thinking that parenting is in fact hard but at the end with perseverance, it will all be worth it. Thank you!

That brought tears to my eyes. I have had those kind of days too. I love being a parent, but it is harder than I imagined. Some days I wonder if I was truly cut out to be a good parent, then I remember I have God on my side and with him, I can do anything.

WOW - its times like that that make us realize that being a parent is SOOOOO worth it!
great job turning around the situation, its a good reminder for all of us to hit the situation from another angle.

Wow!.... Thanks! There are days when I truly need to hear (read) stories like these.....
Parenting is hard... but in the end it's still good. I am a single parent raising 3 children (8,7,and 3), while working full time. I, like most Moms, wear many hats: chef, taxi driver, maid, cheerleader, military sargeant,....etc, etc etc,
Balancing it all (or at least trying to) is a daily challenge...

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I and my eldest daughter always have different opinion when we talk about youngsters. She's 21 years. We always end up quarelling about the issues and unsolved and we will be quite for about few hours. When we have other matter to discuss & come to talk again, everybody seems forgotten about the quarelling that we have came across like sweeping it under the carpet.

I always loved those moments - when you are caught off guard by the sweetness. A speaker at pre-school mother's group said, "Keep in mind, you are not raising a child - you are raising an adult. Think about the traits that will help them succeed and encourage those." I tried to keep that in mind, when my kids were arguing with me - are they standing up for what they believe - are they making sound arguments, etc...

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fantastic! loved how you diffused a tough situation and turned it around. I've got to try and remember to do things like that more often during tough days at home. Thanks!

Thank you for sharing this moment, because it absolutely encapsulates the frustrations and ultimate joy of parenting! As a mother to busy 15, 11 and 3 year old daughters, I completely empathize with those moments.

Great reminder. Life has a lot of hard times but also a lot of great times. I have two teenage daughters and it seems that the hard times outweight the good. But they are sure sweet when they appear.

Good Mommy. I'll bet yours was one and your daughter will be as well. The planet thanks you :)

Thanks for the touching story. I shed a tear because I can relate. A mom working with 2 young boys it is tough. When there is a break throgh with a kid it gives you more energy to keep going. Thanks for the inspiration and awaking.

I am a firm believer in 2 wrongs don't make a right! Just handle a situation with kindness and the result will always be in your favour! What a wonderful example this one is. God bless you guys Angela Richards Bay SA

Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment, everyone!

Well that brought a lump to my throat. I love those moments. At the end of the day that love thing will always creep right in for a feel good moment.

I'm in agreement that parenting is really hard but let's try to remember that when life hands us a lemon we should just add some sugar and make lemonade, savor the bitter taste to enjoy to sweet.

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