Photo by: Ian Buchanan

Memories of my Father

by Tiaras and Tantrums
Photo by: Ian Buchanan

My father was perhaps the hardest working person I have ever met (besides my twin brothers). Because of his (extreme) work ethic, I rarely saw him as a child. At the dinner table each night where we were not allowed to speak one single word or we were dismissed from the dinner table. On Sunday mornings at church as he would give me and my brothers the evil eye if we moved a muscle.

Each and every Sunday we all(me and my little brothers and father) would load up into the cab of my father’s pickup truck and drive to my grandmother’s house (my father’s mother). Every single Sunday. It was a joy, an absolute treat to go. She lived on this huge farm with geese, pigs, cows, chickens, horses and a huge barn.This barn was a delight to explore for new baby kittens… even though my grandmother drowned each and everyone that we found.

I had a mini-bike and my brothers had three-wheelers and we shared a snowmobile for the winter months. We rode horses, collected eggs, climbed the windmill, we explored the deserted train tracks. And we worked as well. In the garden harvesting every vegetable you could think of. We chopped wood, loaded wood, stacked wood and we swept wood chips. I also helped butcher chickens (my brothers were excused from this disgusting chore). I could chop off a chicken’s head, pluck it clean, cut it up perfectly and feed the feet to the cats… I don’t think I could do it today though.

After play time or work time there was always snack time. My grandmother was very German and one had to rest and eat after playing or working. She had the best little snack time ever; to this day I can taste her perfectly plump blackberries with fresh cream, her delicious cheeses and meats and her water that was pumped from the well.

My father would sit at one end of the table and my grandmother at the other. Each would drink, eat and chat. My brothers and I would devour whatever food was in sight and beg for ice cream.

These are the memories of my father… these are the rare times that I saw him as a child.

My father became ill and was diagnosed with a rare blood disease when I was a 15 and quickly deteriorated. We no longer went to my grandmother’s on Sundays. He no longer went to church with us on Sundays. In fact, he was rarely in any shape to do or see anyone.

My father died two months after I graduated from high school. I had already moved away by that time. I was (and still am) sad that I never got to say goodbye to him. But I do know that he has been watching out for me all these years.

My father was very proud of me for graduating high school. I remember chatting with him once when my boyfriend was over at our house and we were discussing college. He was very sick at by this time. My father told me to leave and never come back and to stay away and do whatever it took to be successful. He told me to travel and suggested that I apply to be an airline attendant (I wish I would have listened to him on this one). This was a rare conversation that my father ever had with me and I will cherish it forever. That is my favorite memory of my father.

I stayed away and I did succeed and I love to travel.

What is your favorite memory of your father?

Sassy Redheaded, Tiara wearing, No Tantrums Allowed, Marshmallow Momma to 3 gorgeous children whom I love to the ends of the earth and more.I am just a woman who is a little bit girlie, a little bit naughty and completely divine. Living the splendid life!

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47 Comments

My favorite memory of my father is our father-daughter dance at my wedding. I'm really not much of a ball room dancer, but my father made me feel like a princess that afternoon. There's a picture that proves it by the serenely happy look on my face. He was a great dancer. I also remember one time as a child when we got each other laughing so hard that we just couldn't stop - every time one of us slowed down the other took off giggling all over again...

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How lovely that you manage to find a positive in what began as such a sad story. Often it does seem our parents forget to be sweet and tender because they are so very busy being parents, partners, employees, etc. and only when we become parents do we fully understand.
I am the product of parents that are the gold standard of parents.I was well loved and have known it every moment of my existance...

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Good post. I'm glad I happened upon it. Today's the 1st anniversary of my dad's death ... 1 year ago today, as I sat w/my son at a 30th birthday party for him, along w/his dad & his dad's S.O., & I & a friend, I received the call that said Dad had died. Suddenly, though he had been ill off & on.

In days leading up to today--when we will again have a birthday dinner for my son, who'll always remember his grandfather died on his 30th birthday--I've been mulling all this over...

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What a touching story! Thanks for sharing:)

I am lucky enought to have many, many good memories of my father:). I am the youngest and the only girl. I was his princess. My father passed away August, 2008. My most fond memory of him was a gift he gave me that summer. He was in and out of hospitals and nursing homes all summer. The gift he gave me was the honor of taking care of him that summer...

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This is a beautiful article! My most favorite memory of my dad is him telling me how to handle things in life. He was a man with alot of wisdom. I miss him alot sometimes.

Have a great day everyone!

My memories of my dad were far different...dinner was a lively time at which we were encouraged to talk, The joke in our family was that my younger sister never had to ask questions, because I asked them all, including those about sex. My dad would look over at my mom, shrug his shoulders and say "Ok, you take this one." and she would, to the best of her ability. We still laugh about it now that she is 85 and I am 51...

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Nice to have good memories of your father, but I wish I hadn't read the part about your grandmother drowning all the kittens. How absolutely horrible! I believe I would have quit looking for them if I knew their fate.
I am sure your father would have been very proud of you for all you have accomplished.
All the best...

Wonderful recap.
I was very lucky in that I had my father in my life very long. He passed away Dec 26, 2008 and I miss him every day. He provided a security blanket and comfort and love to me that I can not even begin to convene in words. Love is such a blessing when you recieve and it is totally conditional!

That was a beautiful story! I could just imagine how wonderful it is to have such rich memories! I also lost my father soon after high school, before I was married. He had a heart attack and I also was far away from him and often wish I could have said goodbye. But I see evidence everyday that he is watching out for me - as your father does for you...

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Actually and unfortunately I do not have any good memories of my birth father but I had the most wonderful step-father who, even though I was already an adult in my early thirties when he married my mother, accepted me as his daughter and I called him "Dad". He loved me. He often told me of his rather long list of the ways that he admired me...

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I absolutely loved this, I can definitely relate since I also lost my father a month after graduating high school.. I also did not get the chance to say goodbye...

Love you daddy always will......

My dad would go out and mow the lawn in the summer, then come in all sweaty and pick my up in his arms and rub his sweaty face on mine. He would dance with me on his feet...he would snap or whistle when he wanted our attention...he was not a man of many words, but I always knew he loved me, and he gave me an exquisite picture of a heavenly Father's love. He's been gone several years and I miss him every day.

My Father was the most caring and giving person I've ever met !!! He was so caring and lovable ... I miss him sooooo dearly , He was my HERO ... He had alzheimers and suffered a stroke , I lost him when he was 81 , 5 year ago . I had him for 29 years of life , I learned so much from him , what an honor to had him as my Father !!! We bud heads in many times but he was always there to listen to me !!

The memories of my father was a good story. I can identify with having a great and hard working dad. My dad taught me values and how to live, love and respect myself. As a female, I understand and value that teachings from him. Sometimes, as women we forget to take care of ourselves. By nature we are caregivers and put others first;however, we have to remember to value, live, love and respect ourselves...

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