Is My Child Ready for a Pet?

There are few things more irresistible than kittens, puppies and bunnies. Except maybe for the looks on your child’s face when he or she begs you for a pet of their very own. But it’s not as cut-and-dry as just saying “yes” or “no.” There are emotional factors that you have to consider with both decisions. Carol Dawidowicz, MFT from Positive Change Counseling Center adds her expertise to this complex topic.


1. Is your child mature enough to be conscientious? If your child is easily distracted and plays with his toys for a few minutes before abandoning them in favor of something new and more exciting or leaves his dinner plates on the table and runs off to play video games, these are both signs of immaturity. If, however, your child is helpful around the house and in keeping his room relatively clean, then chances are, he’ll be responsible with a pet.


2. Does your child show respect for animals? Does your son wrestle with the neighbor’s dog and pull on its ears or tail? Does your daughter understand that she can’t always prod at a kitten or a puppy just because she’s in the mood to play? Making sure your kids understand that pets are living beings, not toys, is crucial to their development and for the respect and responsibility they’ll eventually have for a pet.


3. How energetic is your child? Dogs are more energetic than cats and also need more outdoor activity than their feline counterparts. Cats love to play, but it’s more contained (such as with a laser pointer or a scratching post) and doesn’t need as much outdoor time. Other caged pets, such as birds, hamsters, lizards, and turtles, are self-contained and are ideal for less energetic kids.


4. Does your child truly want a pet because he loves the idea of it, or does he want one because he’s seen them on TV or because his best friend has one? Before you agree to bring a pet home, have this talk with your child. You don’t have to grill him, just dig a little bit to find out his reasons for wanting a pet.


5. Is your child mature enough to understand everything that accompanies pet ownership, including the eventual death of a beloved pet? Dawidowicz explains, “Losing a pet is often the first time that a child experiences death. It can be [both] traumatic and painful for the child, but it can provide an opportunity for learning and growth. Parents can support a healthy grief response by encouraging children to share their feelings and by helping them to create a goodbye ritual. “


Making sure the entire family is ready to take on a four-legged, feathered or hard-shelled family member has to involve everyone in the family; and as long as everyone is ready for the responsibility, it’s a green light to head to a breeder or animal rescue. Dawidowicz adds, “A pet can be beneficial for a child’s well-being. Anxious children often feel calmer in the presence of their animal. Pets also provide a sense of unconditional companionship. This can be valuable if a child is dealing with peer issues or major life changes such as moving.”



Shelley Moench-Kelly, MBA, is a New England-based writer and editor whose freelance clients include Google, L’Oreal Paris and TheWeek.com.