Ive tried all types of way to get my 22 mnth old to stop breastfeeding. she eats 3 times a day and is fine if we are out of the house but as soon as we get home she attacks me.
btw. crying it out is not an option, it didnt work!
well I finally got her weaned probably 3 or 4 days after her 2nd b-day. my trick was to tell her that my breast was hurting and she understands the concept of pain and left me alone ever since!
It will work she is old enough to know if she keeps on crying that you are going to give in. Try and distract her to do something else, play with a toy, read her a story....etc. GOOD LUCK!
Crying it out is always harder on the moms heart It will work if you stick it out. If she is 22 months old and you are the adult Be the adult if you want to stop breast feeding then you stop and she will follow your lead and what you want. At this age it is not about what they want. Do you give in to everything she wants if you do then you are going to have major problem later on. This is just a control & attention thing at this point. She is the boss and you are following her. If she is eating solids and drinking from a cup then she is getting her needs met, then she does not need to be breastfed. You may need to do some playtime or other activities when she wants the breast but that is what she is looking for is the one on one, start a mommy time of activities that just you and her do at those feeding times think about it when she is at the breast she has your full attention you can't do anything else at those times but sit that is what she is enjoying so replace the breast with something else that just the two of you do.
hi, i agree it is an emotional need, not a nutritional one right now, i just stopped nursing my 20 month old and ( i nursed my 1st for 23 months) and basically the only advice i have is do it one nursing at a time. For me, I had to change everything about that nursing, where i sat, how i held her, watch your words even. i gave extra physical attention other times to give her that skin to skin that she felt so comforted by (i.e. hugs, back rubbing). It is a difficult thing to do especially if the baby isn't ready. My daughter was easier than my son, poor guy had to be pryed off of me :). It does help it your hubby can take over some of the big nursing times. I always felt better (not perfect but better) knowing my child was crying in the loving arms of his/her father. They also created a stronger bond based on that next step. Good Luck, if you want to talk more I would love to help any way I can. ____@____.com
p.s. i am in streamwood and need a playmate for my 20 month old daughter, if you are interested, let me know.
p.p.s. mu huband just reminded me of the most valuable tool, both my kids were told at around 15/16 months that 'the milk was sleeping', at night..... i know is sounds silly, but it works. In the morning the milk was awake until i was ready to cut out the morning nursing. they are so smart, be sure to talk to her about it. 'right now the milk is busy/sleeping/all gone/will be back later' i am not saying to lie to her, just explain it in terms she can understand.
Hi there Kim~
This may sound terible, but my son was 3 years old when he stopped nursing. At this time he only did it at night (bed time) and to sooth himself if he got hurt. He pretty much used me for a pacifier. I kept telling him that my milk was going bad, cause he was getting too big for mommy milk. Well, he would taste it and say it tasted fine. He drank fine from a cup etc. Then I decided to put lemon juice on my nipples. Then when he would want to nurse, I would tell him that my milk was no good anymore.
He would taste it and then with the lemon juice on it did not taste good. We did that a few nights and eventually he did not want to nurse anymore. He did like to cuddle and feel skin. I believe that was his security.
Good luck.
J.
I had this too. Slowly wean each feed one at a time, by a minute at a time.Start with the shortest feeding an every day, cut it by a minute. When your down the the last minute, occupy thier time with something else connecting like finger play, reading or singing and rocking and offer sippy cup/bottle of milk while you do it.Once that feed is weaned, then start witht eh next one. Or replace the feeding with a sippy cup of water/milk of you want to do the crash course.
You are a full-time stay at home mom. Your daughter assumingly spends a lot of time with you. I am appalled (sp?) by the responses you received and completely disagree. Please do some research before listening to mothers who probably (forgive me ladies if I am wrong) did not nurse for much longer than a year, if that. Babies and toddlers are obviously capable of surviving without the breast and will supplement with solids etc when their mommy is not around. However....remember that nursing is NOT all about the nutrients only, it is a developmental and emotional relationship which they go through. Your daughter does NOT sound ready developmentally and emotionally to wean. Again, I do not see the dynamics but from what you describe you really should listen to her cues. Kids know when they are ready to become autonomous and she is clearly not. You may not choose the self-weaning (although that is actually based on research the healthiest way to go) method but it sounds like she needs a while longer to bond and stay close to you at your breast. Just know, you are doing a fabulous thing and it is increadibly admirable. You should be very proud of yourself and know that you are doing a magnificient thing for your child. Good luck with your choices and WAY TO GO!!!
I tried this and it worked for me. I exclusively fed on one side for two weeks; drying out the other one. Then I moved to the other breast and had a sippy cup of milk. She was frustrated that there was nothing coming out, within a day or so she decided the sippy cup was much better. It took three weeks total. She was 20 months and only nursed at night.
I hear your pain LOL, my son is a lot older (31 months) and we just stopped and it was very hard. I had tried to stop at certain times 15,18,24 months and it didn't helpe and
i thought it really was not hurting him, but then it kinda got irratating when I knew full well that he could drink out of a cup. My advice is to just do it slow
Since it seems as if you are asking for help on how to stop breastfeeding, I'll try to offer advice that assists you with that. Every family is different; some choose to breastfeed for a shorter period of time while others go longer. It doesn't matter which way you go as only you know your family and your child best. And, nearly every child who has given up the breast (be it at 3, 6, 9, 12, 18, 24, or more months) has managed to become resilient, pleasant children, so don't beat yourself up over her dissatisfaction at this point. She'll be fine!
From your post, it sounds like you're ready to be done, and many people have given you good ideas on how to help her stop while still attending to her emotional needs (in my opinion, at 22 months this is less about nutrition and more about security). I'd definitely find ways to alternately soothe her or divert her attention from the breast (daddy, an object or toy).
No matter your decision, you should remain consistent. If you're going to stop, stop. Don't keep waffling back and forth because it may only cause her confusion (hey wait a minute - yesterday you didn't let me have it and today you will? - goody! we're not done!). You don't have to use crying it out if you don't feel comfortable with it, but as you've learned, you have a very strong-willed almost-2 year old and it might take a bit of persistence before she gives it up completely. Just be patient and consistent.
Good luck to you! If you are truly ready to stop, commit to it and provide another source of soothing for your child.
It looks like you have a decision to make - let it end or let it continue. It's a personal choice to breastfeed, so commenting on that is irrelevant. Do what you think is best, but be consistent with your choice. If you are done...you're done. End it cold turkey so it is no longer an option for her.
If you are ready for it to end, then it looks like you're going to have to make a big commitment to ending the nursing. Since she "is fine if we are out of the house", she certainly knows she is capable of feeding herself in other ways.
Have you tried another item, toy, or object as a 'soother' to take the place of your breast? How about having dad step in more (since he doesn't have the breasts)? If she starts up on the 'gimme the breast' thing, have you tried distracting her with another toy or activity?
It sounds like you're ready to stop and she isn't. If you are ready and committed, then YOU need to be the one to put an end to it. As you've discovered, she's not going to be happy, but the more you continue to give in to her, the more she will wear you down...not just on the breastfeeding, but likely other things later on in life.
Be strong! If you're ready to do this and you WANT to do this - then be patient and consistent! Good luck to you.
If you want to stop you may need to go more slowly and not make a control issue out of it (on your child's end). If she has other things that comfort her, although nothing is a soothing as the breast, that will help ease the transition. Is there something going on that's causing her to need a little more TLC? Perhaps you could wait another month or so and it will be easier. Give some time to get past all the previous crying. Hang in there and good luck!
PS. The weaning will not benefit her at all so it sounds like she's pretty smart!
My little one stopped on her own right before she turned 2 1/2 yrs old. I got comments from family members (those who have never nursed or pretended to but mostly used formula) about how crazy it was for her to still nurse at night.
When she felt good and ready, she felt good and ready and that was that. I have to say it was a perfect time for baby and mom and never was it forced. So hang in there. If she doesn't even think about it when you're out, it will be sooner than later. My daughter did the same thing right around the time she apparently was weaning herself. You are doing not only a wonderfully healthy thing but also bonding in the most amazing way. ENJOY it while you still are!
