Why Will He Not Sleep?

At about 16 months or so, babies will fall into a nice schedule. That's when they take two long naps. One in morning and one in afternoon.just be patient.

This is kind of serious. He needs the sleep so that his brain can develop. You need to enlist your pediatrician's help.

I vaguely remember those days, as I was living in a fog myself. I was always trying to make our son sleep in his crib until one of my friends said, "The best place for baby to sleep is wherever baby WILL SLEEP." Our oldest often napped in the swing. Our youngest liked the bouncy seat and his car seat. We utilized those quite a bit until they grew out of them. By that time they were both doing a much better job of sleeping in their own bed.

At night, I started letting our oldest sleep with us. I would often put him in his own bed at the beginning of the night. When he woke up for the first feeding, I would nurse him lying down and then go back to sleep myself. The next time I woke at night was usually the next time he needed to eat. Once I started doing that, I got so much more sleep!

I think if you can find ways that he can sleep without you needed to hold him (swing, bouncy seat, carseat, whatever), you will get a little more sleep yourself. And the more he sleeps, the more he will sleep. He's probably sleep deprived, so getting him some more sleep right now will help him get to sleep more easily.

Hang in there! Because this really won't last forever.

If he's fussy or crying when he wakes, just be sure to get a big burp before you lay him down - especially if he's breastfeeding before he drifts off. That can unsettle a baby enough to wake him.

I would definitely take him in and ask the pediatrician. 20 minutes of sleep is a tiny cat nap - he should be sleeping for a few hours at a time at this stage in the game (at least).

Are you producing enough milk? Is he well fed? How's his weight gain?

Does he take a soother? Have you tried a swing or bouncy seat? The bouncy seat is what saved me. I got a vibrating one with bubbles (like an aquarium) and it soothed my babies to sleep and kept them asleep during the day at nap time. I didn't always lay them down in a crib during the day - they would nod off in the chair and I'd let them have a good rest.

As for bottles (if that's what you're trying to do) changing up nipples (I went with the one that was shaped most like me) and trying different milk temperatures (mine had to have it quite warm) can really make a difference. I'd have someone else offer the bottle to start.

I have had a daycare in my home for 13 years. If you have ruled out the need to burp, etc. You need to let him fuss a little. We all sleep in REM cycles, more and less asleep. If a child falls asleep while being held then wakes up a little and realizes that they are no longer being snuggled they are going to protest. Every child needs to learn to soothe themselves. 4 months is young, so I wouldn't let him fuss too long, but give him a chance to figure it out. They are MUCH smarter than most people give them credit for. Has he discovered his thumb yet? Make sure it is available and not covered by a sleeve.

Good Luck

Will he sleep longer if your holding him? If he only sleeps for 10 to 20 minutes even when you are holding him, you need to take him to the doctor.

I'm sure you've heard this from other responders too - but please talk to your pediatrician. My son was a crappy sleeper - still is - but he was sleeping in 2 hour stretches. He simply kept the 2 hour schedule up for 10 months straight! 10-20 minutes of sleep sounds horribly abnormal. And I feel for everyone involved. Once you've ruled out colic, indigestion, sleeping preferences ( bouncies / vibrating beds, noice machines, etc ) - you really need to ask a pediatrician.

Hi congrats on your bundle of joy! I agree...you should ask your pediatrician for guidance. He really should be exhausted after 3 hours af being awake to sleep way longer then 10-20 minutes! You have got to be wiped out yourself!! Also try a pacifier if he doesn't have one that always worked for my kids! I would go to doc asap! Good luck!!

Do you have a baby swing or a vibrating bouncy chair?
Our son use to love napping in those.
Talk to your pediatrician about it - maybe it's a reflux issue.
Use a baby carrier to carry him around during the day and a nice walk in the stroller in the fresh air can really help tire them out.
You and your husband can take turns watching the baby while the other gets a few hours sleep or you can have a relative or baby sitter do it while you catch a nap.
You have to have a strategy where you can get some sleep for yourself.
My mom tells me I was a colicky baby and screamed my head off round the clock for the first 6 months of my life and then it just stopped.
Hang in there!