My daughter and son turned 4 and 2, respectively, in September (the 10th and 7th. Our school district's kindergarten cutoff is September 30. While my daughter is in pre-k and doing fine, and I plan on sending my son to pre-k when he's 3 and 4, I am wondering if I should hold them back and start them when they are 5-almost 6, rather than 4-almost 5. Sending them when they are still 4 sounds too young. While they are developmentally and emotionally on track so far, I am not sure how their later school years will turn out (being smaller kids--they are lower percentile; starting college at 17; getting driver's license last, etc...) My brother's birthday is August 25, and he was very small; my parents sent him "on time" and he was picked on all through his school years. The general concensus around my area is to wait. Do you agree or disagree?
What are other school cutoffs, and what decisions have you made regarding the cutoff and your child? Has anyone waited and regretted? Thank you!
I am a teacher and I have only ever heard parents regret sending them. I have never had a parent regret waiting. My older students generally do MUCH better!
The cutoff in our district is September 1st. My youngest daughter's birthday is in October. I'm glad we had to wait. She's one of the oldest kids in class, but it's been nothing but an advantage both socially and academically. She's ahead of her peers in reading and comprehension, but on the same level in math. This might change as she gets older (she's in 2nd grade now), but there are advanced classes available when she gets into 3rd and above.
i agree to wait. That way he'll be even more ready to deal with school and his peers. Our cut off date is September 1.
wait, wait, wait.
mine are late aug and late sept bdays w/an Oct 1 cutoff. the oldest was a no-brainer to wait because he's 25th percentile height (and lower on weight) and wasn't quite ready socially, although more than ready academically. the younger was a tougher call because she's more like 75th percentile height, would've done ok socially and was way beyond academically.
We waited and I have not regretted waiting at all (1st and 3rd grade this year) even though the youngest was reading 3rd grade level or higher going into kindergarten. her social skills and confidence level is so much higher from having waited - it will carry through her whole life.
there is so much they are going to be exposed to that you're going to say, "really, I have to deal with this already?!!!" seriously, my son had an incident with two girls passing notes with threats attached over "loving" him. huh, 8 and 9 years old? this was 5th/6th grade behavior when I was a kid. and I've had more than one teacher tell me it'll only get worse (look at the stats on drugs, alcohol, etc in middle school) Or - think about having to explain a lock down drill to a 4 year old? Because that drill should happen in the first 6 weeks of school. "mommy, why can't the police officer see me or hear me when he looks in the window?" (my son's class had a couple kids who weren't in the right place because the police helping w/the drill could see them and they had a discussion about it.)
like another poster said, I didn't talk to a single person who regretted waiting but for those that sent "on time" or sent early, at least 1/2 regretted it. They only get to be little kids for such a short time, why make it even shorter?
whatever your decision though, be comfortable w/it and don't feel like you need to defend it - you know your kids and your family's situation best and your gut will tell you the right thing to do!
It depends upon the child, you will know if they are ready when the time comes. I sent my son to kindergarten at age 4 with a birthday on November 24. He is small for his age, but he was socially and academically ready. I think he would have become a discipline problem had we waited. So, I have no regrets, but you should follow your gut, get the impression of your child's preschool teachers, and talk to your child.
Good luck,
C.
The cut off here is Sept 1. My son was born on Sept 19. I tried to get him in this year, but since his birthday was more than 2 weeks past the cut off they said no. Now, I am actually glad, I see him in his pre-k class, and think this extra year will do him some good.
I had no choice because my daughter misses the cut-off by two weeks. She is in pre-K and turned 5 on October 7th. While it is fine with me that she will be one of the oldest in her class, it also means that she won't be in school for a full day until she is almost 7 (she will turn 7 right after entering 1st grade). Next year she will be in kindergarten which is not even 3 full hours a day and she will be 6. To me, 6 seems old to be spending so much time at home with mom and two small siblings and as she is bright, energetic and social, I fear that I won't be able to provide her the stimulation she needs and craves at home. (We don't have the budget to do any kiddie classes like gymnastics, art, etc.). So I guess, short term it will be hard for her and for me and long term it will be fine and maybe for the best.
Mine aren't quite as young - Son's bday in June, daughters bday in July. They will both be 17 when they graduate. Depends on the kids. Will they be bored with another year of preK. Kindergarten ain't what it used to be! Both my kids learned to pretty much completely read in K. Mine, however are also tall for their age. I know they are on the young side for their grades, but they do well. My son is in 3rd grade and will go completly thru the year only being 8. My daughter is in 1st and will finish the year still being 6. There are kids in their grades that are almost a year older than them. The both do very well socially and academically. I say what it out and see what is best for each individual child. IMO I would rather my child repeat K than PreK though. They learn SO much more in K!!
I sent by daughter early. She was completely ready both socially and academically. So far no regrets (she's a hs freshman). I was a little odd at a few of the b-day parties when she went to a classmates party who was turning 8 and she had just turned 6. There was some difficulty in 1st grade with learning to read, but now she's the top in her class. I will admit I do have concerns about her starting college at 17.
I've been struggling with this for awhile. Here the cutof is September 1st (most states are September 1st, some are even earlier) and my son's birthday is September 11. My husband and I were both one of the younger ones in our classes and liked it - the only time it was really an issue was when everyone started driving. Had either of us waited another year we would have gone stir crazy. As it was we were skipping grades.
As for my son, I did push him into pre-K early so that he was turning 4 during it. He is now in private K at age 5 - I still couldn't decide, so I was buying another year. If I want him to contine on the "early" track, he'll have to go to private 1st grade next year and then public school afterwards. Although he is doing wonderfully in the small, private Kindergarten and is on track academically (pretty much right in the middle), socially, emotionally I am now seeing the benefit to putting him in public K next year year. There are a lot of people that red shirt Kindergarteners, now so he would have been more than a year younger than some of his peers. Also, as one of the older ones it will help his confidance and leadership ability.
I just had to make that decision last year. My daughters bday is the end of July and our cut off is Sept 1. I decided to hold her back and couldnt be happier with the decision. She was ready socially and academically to go at 5. I was always the youngest one in my class and hated it. I was always a B/C student, but really think I could have been that A student had I been given another year. My thought for my daughter was if I sent her "early" I might regret it. If I hold her back I have nothing to regret, other that she might be a little older than some of her classmates.
Think about having to hold your child back later on in life when friendships have already been established. It is easier to hold them back now then later.
