When to Leave a Child Overnight?

I have let my 16 yr old stay in the house overnight when I was at work. I allowed her to have one friend over with her in case of an emergency and they were not allowed to go anywhere that night. She is very responsible and it went fine...

It's time! Leave him home alone after reviewing the house rules and giving him people close by to call if anything happens (neighbors/friends). In two years he should be moving out on his own, he needs to experience the responsibility starting now.

First, I like the idea of finishing the booze in the house first! ;) But I also think he's fine as long as there is someone for him to go to and check in with. Have fun and happy anniversary!!

I'd let him stay home, but have a family friend check on him.

Every child is different. You know your child best. If HE is OK with staying home alone, I would let him. Let neighbors and nearby friends know you'll be out of town so they can help him, if needed, while you're away. AND, they can also keep an eye out for any activity you don't want happening while you're gone (i.e.teen parties!). Another option is for him to stay at your home during the daytime hours (which helps with pets) and then go to a friend's house in the evening, or just before bedtime, to sleep. We did this ALOT with our teenager daughter & it worked great! It required her coming home first thing in the AM to feed & let our dog out, but she liked being at home during the day. Her friend's parents were very willing to drive her home (before she got driver's license) and we reciprocated frequently with having their daughters stay at our house when they were out of town. Happy Anniversary!

C.,
I have both hands for you! Every child is different and I'm not sure how well you know your son, but I was 16 only 10 years ago. My parents wouldn't have left me home alone for 3 days for a reason. Yes he may be 16 but so much could happen and could he handle it or what if he gets in trouble what if he gets so excited with the freedom??? So many different things! The most my parents did was 1 night alone anything more than that, I had a aunt or uncle stay or I'd have to find somewhere adult supervised I could stay(friend's house etc.). But honestly, if you truly believe he can handle it and you have a great relationship with him and you sit down and talk with him about trust and responsibility and putting the ball in his court, in a way encourage him to want to please you, I think you'd be just fine. With that though, don't call every hour on the hour to see how things are going, otherwise he won't believe that you truly do trust him! Good luck.

I would let him stay home, but let him know clearly what your expectations are (no going out after a certain time and NO friends over) and I would also let him know that people will be checking in on him - and then do that. I was also "very responsible" and I would grab at those situations to have my boyfriend over - or even to get just other girlfriends over. We would never be up to 'parent approved' activities. But no one checked in on me either. Do you have anyone (preferably family, like aunts/uncles or grandparents) that can stop by unscheduled to see how he is doing?

I think at 16, your son is responsible enough for you to be gone for a night. Just make sure you give him a number to call you in case an issue arrives and let him know who else is available for minor issues.

Angie

When I was in high school, my father sometimes traveled for business and stayed overnight. He hired someone who would stay at the house with me--always--when he was out of town.

Personally, I think even a high school student who is mature and doesn't mind the idea should have some overnight supervision.

It is probably ok to leave your son ovnight if he is responsible. However, I would have a family member, neighbor or trusted friend check in with him and drive by to be sure everything is ok. Even responsible kids can get into trouble, especially if their friends know the parents are gone. We left our kids 16, and 17 home one time and disaster struck when a huge party was held at our house. I won't go into details but we never left again without having someone checking the house and checking in with the kids.

At 16 he should be able to spend the night alone but I would ask a neighbor to keep an eye on him and give them your cell/phone number just in case. If he is as responsible as you indicate you should be okay. Do you trust him enough to have one of his friends stay with him? If they are good kids you might come home to a messy house but it would give you the night you want and give him the opportunity to show you how responsible he can be. It is a scary the first time you do it but you will only find out by trying.

You say your son is responsible. If so and he can be trusted I say go for it. Do you have a close neighbor that can also keep an eye on things? If so I'd ask them and let your son know that they will be keeping an eye on things too and if he needs anything he can go to them. I live in a small town and that seemed to work for us. Just make sure he knows the rules ie: no parties, no girls over (should you let him have 1 friend over) etc.
Have a happy anniversary.

I think that age 16 is old enough to stay by oneself. If it would make you and your husband feel better about the situation, ask a neighbor or relative to call your son to see how things are going. When I was a freshman in high school (I am 34 now), my parents went on a cruise for a week, leaving me home alone with my 17y/o sister and 9 y/o brother during the school yr. We did have neighbors/relatives we could contact in emergencies or if there was anything we needed. Also, give your son the name and number of the hotel you will be staying at or if you have a cell phone, he knows that he can call if anything comes up. Enjoy your night away and relax.

About me: I am a 34 y/o SAHM to 3 kids, 6 y/o son, 3 y/o son and 19 mo daughter. Married to a wonderful man for almost 10 yrs

I'm pretty liberal and think it might be ok for him to stay by himself. My husband says absolutely not! For emergency reasons, a 16 yr old doesn't have the maturity to know what to do in certain situations.
If you decide to leave him, ask a neighbour or family member to go over and check on him or have someone call periodically.

Otherwise, could he not feed the animals, sleep at a friends place and then rteturn early the next morning?

It is your anniversary and you don't want to be worrying about him either!

Hope you find a solution!

I think 16 is fine for sure. Maybe have a neighbor or friend come check on him tho to make sure he isn't having a party... that would be my only concern. :) Happy Anniversary!

I think 16 is plenty old enough.

Hello C.,

Your son is definitely old enough to stay at home by himself as long as you trust him and you know he is responsible. I mean, at 17 1/2 you're able to enlist into the Army, so at 16 I believe they can stay home by themselves.... My parents used to leave me to stay at home at 16 overnight. Hope this helps.

Legally, there are only some guidelines about children's age and when they are ok to stay at home. This mostly applies to latchkey kids or those kids in the early teens.

Personally, when I was 16, I was left home alone overnight with my younger brother. I also babysat overnight to care for other children. I had a part-time job and my own car.

You know your son best, if his friends are trustworthy and he has some form of mobility (a car, a neighbor with a car, a family member with a car) in case of emergency... then his age should be fine.

It's really maturity and safety that should guide when an older teenager stays at home and as his parent, you either trust him or you do not. If you trust him, then give him the chance to show you his maturity and ability to handle responsibility. If you are concerned that it wouldn't be safe for him, then, how would that impact your trip if you did leave him alone against your better judgement?

Also, do you have friendly neighbors? When our neighbor's boy was 17 his parents left him home alone. They asked us to keep a watch out to see if any other cars showed up or if things seemed rowdy over there. We were fine to keep an eye on the house and make sure he wasn't having a massive party over there.

Not sure this helps, but good luck to you!