When to Have a Sleep Over

T.,
I was just reading in a magazine about someone that their little one wanted a sleepover, but was a bit too young. They ended up having a morning pajama party. All the parents brought the kids over in the morning...still in their pj's and had breakfast and games and all that stuff. I think they made a day of it. And they didn't have to deal with any little ones getting scared and wanting to go home in the middle of the night;)

I actually let my daughter have one when she was 4. The girl she had over had been in her class the year before and then this year and they had a quite a few play dates and I was comfortable with the parents and the little girl. They both were good and had a great time! :)

Regarding sleep overs: I am the mother of 9-year-old twin daughters (birthday 2-15). Regarding a slumber party, my girls had their first last August and I had 9 little girls here (ages 7 & 8) and it turned out fabulous. I wouldn't have had one any sooner age-wise, because (in my opinion,and other moms that I spoke with about it) it would have been too soon. Younger children have a tendency to want "their" parents late night, which means a phone call home to come and pick their little one up. Also, sleep patterns have developed better, in that the older ages "like" their sleep and tend to go to sleep at a half-way descent hour. We set our "lights out" at midnight and not one of the little girls had a problem with it. They woke up early, rested and happy.

Since your daughter is only going to be 5, I would start out with having just 1 friend spend the night and see how it goes. It also depends on if your child, or the child you have stay over, has any prior experience spending the night away from home, which also makes a huge difference.

My daughter had her first sleepover when she was 5. We gave her a party first, and then after 4 or 5 of her cousins were asked to sleepover. She will have her first sleepover where school friends will be invited this year (for her 10th birthday).

Every situation is different, and it depends not on your daughter, but the type of relationship you have with the parents of children that will be asked to sleepover.

I agree with the others it depends on the children. Think about who her friends are and their maturity level. I did my DD's at age 7 and 10. It was wild, but they had fun and it is only one night! I suggest a Friday night, then they have the rest of the week-end to recuperate.

Have Fun :)

I think it all depends on the child. I have 5 yr old triplets and would not think twice about letting them have a sleepover or go to a sleepover. I also agree with Cathy to make it a small amount of girls and be ready if any of them get homesick and want to go home. My daughter does that ocassionally. but a call home to me or daddy always solves the problem.

I think it's appropriate to send out invites at least 1 month in advance so that parents can clear their schedules. Put an RSVP with "regrets only".

I found it depended a lot on the child. My youngest thought it was the most fun you could have while breathing, and started routine sleepovers at about 3 1/2. My elder daughter didn't do anything of the kind until she was closer to 12 -- just wasn't interested.

We didn't do 'pajama parties' though -- it wasn't a party, it was just someone staying at our house for the night. Keeping it routine and low-key meant that for the most part, most of the kids got as much sleep here (and at the other family's home) as they would have had alone.

Protracted periods of insufficient sleep are very hard on growing bodies, so we took sleep very seriously here. Still do, in fact.

I think that at 5 if she wants a pj party it would be fine. I would limit her to one or two people so it is easier to get them to sleep and for your own sanity. Be prepared however for the children you invite to get homesick and quite possibly want to go home.

It depends how comfortable you feel with the parents and the child or children. My dd is 4.5 and had her first sleepover was when she turned 4. The other girl was her age and are great friends. I am also really close with her parents. We never had any problmes and they have done this numerous times and not just 1 night sometimes 2 nights.

It depends on the kids you want to invite. My son's friend will stay at our house no problem but my son doesn't want to stay at his house. He said it is too scary. If you do try it be prepared for one or more to say they want their mom or dad and want to go home at 2am :) :)

Why don't you try just making it a pajama party, and not a sleep over. have the kids come in PJs, you can have breakfast food for dinner, stay up "late", and then when the party is over, they can go home. I am sure that most parents would rather pick their kids up at 9pm and happy, than at midnight and crying.

Your daughter is too young for a traditional sleepover. My suggestion is: Have a mom & daughter sleepover with 1-3 close friends or relatives. If your daughter has a good friend whose mom feels sure she can handle it, you can try having her over but be prepared to have to send for her parents in the middle of the night. It's not your daughter that will be the problem if she's in her own home with you - it's the other child. Or, if she has a friend or relative 2 or 3 years older, perhaps she could sleep at your house. My grown daughters do sleepovers with both moms and young children occasionally and have a blast. Most kids aren't ready for a sleepover without their moms until about 2nd or 3rd grade. I have 4 grown daughters, 17 grandkids, and have taught girls at my church for 15 years. At church, we never allowed girls to come to sleepovers without an adult with them until they were at least 2nd grade. Good luck!~ G. B.

The other parents will basically let you know. You can invite 5 year olds over to sleep, but don't be surprised if many of them can't. If I knew the family well, I would have no problem letting my child stay the night. If I didn't know the family well, then I wouldn't be comfortable letting my child stay.
S.