When Is Using a Fork and Spoon Absolutely Necessary?

Just gonna echo what these other ladies said.
No worries. It'll happen when he's ready.
He'll get to that age where he wants to mimic anything and everything that he sees Daddy and Mommy do :-)
Right now, think about the wonderful and very necessary developmental thing that he's doing -- Tactile Development!
K. H,
M. to Catherine (4yrs) and Samuel (13mos)
wife to Chris (much older)

Just keep encouraging him to use his fork. I worked in child care centers for 16 yrs. and it takes time for children to get used to using toddler utensils. I noticed kids would get frustrated with the forks when they couldn't "stab" their food and eventually they would just pick it up with their fingers. They learn to handle utensils better when they get a little older. Don't worry, he'll get it.

Hello Cecilia. My name is R.. I am a stay at home mom and have a 6 year old daughter and a son that just turned 2 in January. My son didn't like silverware either at that age. He loved to use his hands. And if I tried to feed him myself, he pitched a fit. I knew it was because he was learning to be independant so what I did is take his clothes off at dinner time and let him use his hands. If we went out to eat I tried to give him things that wouldn't make him to dirty. But I always put a spoon or fork in front of him with his meal even if he didn't want to use it. That way he got used to it and watched us use it too. Eventually he started picking it up. Just recently, when I sit him down with food at that table, he will go get his own silverware out of the drawer. He now uses it very good. So I wouldn't worry about your baby not getting it. He will soon enough. Sometimes we have to remember that we can lead a horse to water but we can't make it drink. And that is so true with children. They will do things when they are ready to do it. Good luck. I hope everything turns out well for you.
R.

When are fork and spoon necessary?

When he wants to start dating!

Hahah. I apologize for the joke answer, but my son is the same age as yours and he's exactly the same way. My goals are the following, and in order of importance: 1) to get him not to throw food on the floor, 2) to actually eat something. I seldom win on either of those. :P

If i were you i wouldnt really worry right now!! My son is 17 1/2 months old, and he just now wanted to start useing a fork and spoon (like last week), some kiddos are interested earlier and some are not!! Dont worry, just give it to him and if he uses it he will and if not then no worries. Just remember he may play with them and that is fine that is how he will learn, (not sure if you already do this but if not), then sit him at the table with yall while yall eat and let him imitate you guys with the fork and spoon thing!! Hope this helps ya!!

By the time he's ready for college! Seriously, he will learn all the tricks of getting food on his fork and spoon, but right now, his fine motor skills aren't ready for the task. When I was a new mom about 38 years ago, the big thing was early potty training - but my pediatrician told me that as long as I wasn't packing diapers in his back-pack for kindergarten, I shouldn't stress.

Right now, his feeling of independence is more important - and if he's willing to try new foods that's a bonus. It's more important that he has a pleasant time at the table for meals. Nothing turns a child into a picky eater faster than to be stressed while he's eating.

Hi Cecilia,

I am a 32 yr. old mother of four boys - the youngest is 15 months. My advice is -- don't worry about it. I mean, you are obviously teaching him good manners, so unless you are in a situation which requires excellent manners - like a five star restaurant, he's ok. And at 15 mths, being able to put the spoon in his mouth (with food still on it) is really advanced. Mine knows the basics of how to hold and use a spoon, but it is so much easier for him to toss it - generally on the floor - and use his fingers. Its also more fun. Besides, there will always be finger foods. Especially in the next several years. So, sit back, enjoy the chicken nuggets and hot dogs and gold fish crackers and anything else that those fingers can grab. Which of course, is anything he can reach. :)

H.

Your little fellow is doing fine! There is never any need to rush children into new habits, and since he enjoys eating, using his hands is the most natural for him. You said you have introduced the toddler fork & spoon and he didn't object to it as long as you put the food on it. Perhaps it still feels a bit strange to him, but time will take care of that.

Sounds like everything is going great...just relax & have it a happy time with him at mealtime.
My best to you, M. T. (mother of 3 & grandmother of 1)

Don't stress about it. Just keep modeling using the spoon and fork and talking about it while doing so. When he is ready...and physically able, he will start using utinsils. My daughter is 21 months and uses silverware very well, but sometimes will use her fingers so get smaller pieces of food that she can't get.

I think you are great for giving your child feeding utensils at 15 months. He is just beginning. He'll get the hang of it. He's going to enjoy texture of everything from here to (possibly) age 3.

Relax as a teacher and mother of three I can tell you we tend to rush our children too much. It's very important to allow the child to establish his eye and hand coordination at his own rate. Boys don't use their fine muscles of the hand as soon as girls do.

your son is only 15 months old? You have NOTHING to worry about,, just yet. Usually around the age of 24-28 months they start wanting to do the things they see you doing.. so give him a little more time, but keep the encouragment up.. he will catch on... and to be direct in answering your question,, it is absolutely necessary by the time he starts school.

My son is 2.5 years and still doesn't do the best... he'll start but we end up feeding him at the end (I think he gets bored) I don't think there is an age they must start using it. My daughter was the same as my son and is 4 and eats just fine by herself now (obviously). They are both bright and capable, but there is no need to rush. Kids sometimes need a little push, but most things they will do when they are ready. Our society is so driven by who can do what at what age as if it is some reflection on how smart they are. The truth is, it is up to you and your son. I think rushing things like this could make eating time a chore rather than a joy. (i.e.- more time telling them to eat and making you both miserable instead of feeding him and enjoying it.) Hope that helps.

love, mom of 3

I guess my question to you is what are you going to do to keep him from using his hands? At some point, he isn't going to let you put the food on it any more and he is going to use his hands to put the food on it and then eat it and as his motor skills develop he will get the hang of it. If you are serving him a meal that you would use a fork or spoon at or both...give him the same utensils (minus a knife of course :) -though Pampered Chef used to make a kid's knife and my kids really liked trying to use them).

It is so hard to age mark when a child is going to do something. They all reach their independent points at different ages and while at 2 one child may be able to manage a spoon perfectly another child may not have the desire to waste time with silverware and shovel it in with their little fingers!

When I was a new mommy, 13 years ago, I had an older pedi that when I asked when my son would do this or that, he assured me that as long as he had it down by kindergarten everything would be fine. I laugh at that even more now because I didn't have internet to look up milestone charts. There is such a stress on moms now for their children to perform on certain levels and with the internet you aren't just worried what the your child can or doesn't do vs the neighbor child anymore.

Enjoy your child, encourage your child, and everything will be fine! Good luck!

I have 4 boys, (26,23,21,19)
How ever he can be fed at this time is no worry. as long as it's getting mostly in him and not on the rest of the surroundings... but I would say let him practice his coordination skills as long as he needs to. by the time he's 3-4 he should be able to use utinsels. finger food is finger food. honestly I think your doing okay, let him practice and celebrate his accomplishment and he'll get the hang of it.

Cecilia,
Hi, like most of the responses that you have received, I agree with the fact that toddlers like to eat with thier hands. I have twins that are 21 months and although we give them a fork or a spoon they usually end up eating with thier hands. My two older children were the same so just give him a little time and he will get the hang of it. Best of luck!
J.

I don't think you need to worry about him not using his hands any time soon. If he does, it isn't a developmental problem. It just gets the food in faster and sometimes those babies are hungry and really enjoy their food. I have a son who is 2yrs 5 months and he still uses his hands when he gets in a rush. He uses his fork and spoon for a little while then just gives up, and uses his hands. He even uses his hands for peas, corn and rice. I got a little worried too, but his pediatrician said not to worry, he was fine.
~C.~mommy of Colby 8, Carys 3, and Cadyn 2

I wouldn't worry at this point. My son didn't use a fork until 1.5. My daughter started a little early, but usually will pick the food up and put it on her fork.

When was the last time you ate a taco or a french fry? If you are like most people you used your hands! Please don't worry if your son does, too! Always have the fork and/or spoon available for him but don't fret if he doesn't always use them. My 2 y/o sometimes eats food that you normally wouldn't eat with a fork and spoon with them just because he loves using them. Sounds like your boy is just fine where he needs to be so don't worry about it, life is too short to worry about this!

My 3 year old son still uses his hands a lot to eat. He does very well with a spoon and is getting the hang of a fork, a regular fork, not a toddler fork. Toddler forks are so dull that it is really difficult to get food to stay on the prongs. Using utensils is definitely a fine motor skill so have patience with your son and don't scold him for any mess he might make with them, unless he intentionally throws food. I think that it is great that you are introducing the utensils, just don't set your expectations too high because it does take time for any child to master using them.

I have an almost 2 yr old girl. Toddlers love to eat with their hands. We hand her forks and spoons and she will use them and enjoys it, but after a while she'll throw it on the floor and go for the fingers. I really don't care as long as she is happy and feeding herself. They generaly want to be just like us. I am sure if you don't force the issue, he'll get better and better at it on his own.

At his age, he is still busy exploring his food and the fork and spoon just get in the way. Sounds like thigns are going along well, as he does use them some of the time, even if you are helping. It's all part of the journey and there are no absiolutes, but trust that with you alongside, he will start using a fork and spoon when you are both ready. Some foods are very tricky to get with either spoon or fork (think how those peas run around the plate!) and sometimes you just have to put your hand out to help. Enjoy!