When Do You Start Wanting a Second Child??

I had to laugh when I read "how many of you were still feeling exhausted after 4 months?" I'm still feeling exhausted after 46 months!!! Give yourself a break, Mama. The postpartum period lasts 12 months and you are deep, deep in the throws of it.

Raising children is NOT easy. And I agree with you...I thought the first 9 months (with the first child) were the toughest and most tedious. But hang in there...I started to feel a bit more like myself around 5 months. And it got better and better each month after that. Then, when your child is 9 or 10 months old and sleeping for 12 hours in a row, you will begin getting the sleep you need and will feel like a renewed woman.

Best wishes!

PS...Most OBs recommend waiting for 12 months after a c-section to start another pregnancy, to give the uterus the necessary time to heal. I'll tell you the same thing I have told my close friends: Having 2 children very close together was brutal. It's much better now...but I always tell my friends to put a minimum 2 years between their children. The greatest lesson I learned by having a second child was just how easy I actually had it when I had only one. :)

I've been told it can take up to two years to recover from a c-section, scars to heal and all. When my daughter turned two, we were able to get pregnant on the first try. But I agree with your friend, wait until after a year, be sure to be taking your prenatals now and other recommended supplements. Pregnancy is stressful on the body, so you want it to recover as much as you can so you can have more energy later in life too!

good luck!
J. W. MPH
Maternal and Child Health Educator
National Pregnancy Health Examiner
http://www.examiner.com/x-29454-Pregnancy-Health-Examiner
Chicago Family Health Examiner
http://www.examiner.com/x-7158-Chicago-Family-Health-Exam...

I had my son in April of 2007. We didn't start trying for another baby until a month before he turned 2. He is an INTENSE, FULL OF ENERGY (wonderful!!) little boy. I needed that time with him, because at times he felt like 2 kids! I just got pg, so my next child will be born a few weeks before he starts preschool. That seems great to me- because I will have time alone with my next child. MY son has also been in early intervention since he was about 15 months old. That has been very time consuming. I'd say at least wait a year. Your heart will tell you when you are ready...but I'm going to be 30 when this next one is born, so I can't really say what to do if you are 35. Sorry!

Well, for me it has been 15 years and I am still tired lol! My boys are only 13 months apart. It was very hard having two little ones so close together, but looking back I would not have had it any other way. It was a lot like having twins, and now they are extremely close. I think it really depends on when you feel ready. Some people like them close together, and others wait years. Just remember, no matter how you do it, it will never ever be easy but it will be worth it!!! Maybe instead of planning by the calendar, just plan by your heart. You will tell yourself when you are ready. If you look at any child's development, there is always something going on and always a reason not to have the second baby, so you have to stop thinking and start feeling to know when it feels right.

I got pgt. when my first one was 8 month old, by accident.
I was in shock,my first one was really not an easy baby...
When I had my daughter, I thought I could never do that, 2 little ones....
But after having another one 10 years later, I see the difference.
My now 5 year old, is like having an only child, versus my two older children always had each other to play with.
But yes it was hard and I was always tired and burned out.
But I thought it was also hard having my last one at age 38.
I think it gets easier, when they are starting school....
it will get better,hang in there...

I swore off having more children in the year or so after having my first. You see, he was a colicky mess for the first 14 weeks of his life and it mentally/emotionally jarred me to the point where I did not think I could ever go through such an experience again! All I could think of was "I went through 9 months for this?!? For my child to literally scream 14-18 hours a day?!? No way I'm doing this again!" Naturally, after the colic wore off and we started respecting his sleep schedules and things started to fall into place, life got significantly easier. However, it wasn't until he was nearly 2 before we decided to start trying again. For what it is worth, I'm almost 36 so I'm in the same 'age boat' as you.

I'm due in two weeks and, quite honestly, I'm getting a little anxious. While I am certain that everything will (eventually) be fine, just thinking about going back to fragmented sleep and 'starting all over again' is truly, truly scary. Sometimes my husband and I jokingly ask ourselves: "What were we thinking?" because things are so good and so perfect with our nearly 3 year old now.

Although it took a long time, for us the lingering colic shock eventually wore off, our son just became so enjoyable and confidence in our parenting skills grew. We've come such a long way from those early days where, yes, we were sleep-deprived and it was tricky balancing our career and relational lives BUT...we lived through it once to tell about it and if that is as bad as it is going to get, we know we're capable of doing it just one more time. However, with this pregnancy I am DONE (and very happy to be done, too!).