When Do Kids Stop Taking Naps?

Updated on January 15, 2010
J.S. asks from Auburn, WA
20 answers

Alyssa turned 3 in November. She generally wakes up around 8am, and naps from 1-3pm. Her bedtime is 9:00 - 9:30. During naps, she falls asleep within about 3 minutes of laying down. When it comes to bedtime, sometimes it's a struggle, but even if it's not, she often lays awake until 11:00pm or later.

When do kids stop taking naps? Do they phase it out on their own? Should I move her nap time earlier then hope bedtime is easier? Any advise? :-) Thanks!!

~J.

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A.H.

answers from Portland on

Sounds about like what my son did when he needed to stop napping. If he'd nap, he's be awake until 11pm or later. I stopped his nap, he took a couple of days to adjust, then it was much better. He started going to sleep at 8:30 again.. He was 2.5 years old.

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D.T.

answers from Portland on

I'd start with shortening her nap time. On occassion you can see how she does when she doesn't get a nap, but I wouldn't give it up altogether. It will take some transition.

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H.G.

answers from Portland on

Don't take away the nap just shorten it. I would start by cutting your nap time in half from 2 hours to 1. Don't do it for a day or so do it for a week maybe two & see if this helps. If it helps and it is still not enough cut the nap down to 30 minutes for a couple of weeks. If this is still not enough to help her get to sleep right away at night, then cut her nap to 20 minutes. That is the shortest nap she should take before giving them up. Remember if you let her nap too late in the day she still won't sleep very well at night no mater how short the nap. Every kid is different. Remember you can schedule her day so you have the max happy time with simple small changes in her schedule. I would cut the nap time down & make her bed time earlier. Most kids about three years old can sleep 11-13 hours in a row and should get around that much sleep every day. If you do decide to get rid of the nap make sure bed time is earlier because she will be cranky at bedtime.

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B.H.

answers from Seattle on

My 6 year old quit napping about 4, still took quiet time until this year. I knew it was time for the nap to go when he would want to be up late than me. Even though he was a bit cranky at first, he went to bed about 730.
My 2 year old still naps, 2-3 hours daily and sleeps 12 hours at tnight.

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J.W.

answers from Portland on

That's exactly why I've stopped letting my 2 yr old nap. And she hasn't regularly for at least 5-6 months. If she gets any sort of nap, she's up until at least 10-10:30. Otherwise, she's asleep by 8:30 at the latest.

We had a few days of cranky afternoons while getting her off napping completely, but once that was over she was fine.

Good luck, hope you figure out something that works for you!

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A.G.

answers from Portland on

Hi J., I don't have much help since my daughter is the opposite. My daughters name is Alyssa and she just turned 3 in November too!! How funny is that.... My daughter won't take naps, but she is also in preschool two days a week during her normal "quiet time" but sleeps like a pro. So hope it all works out for you and you can get some other great mommy advice.

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T.J.

answers from Seattle on

I think it really depends on the child. My 3.5 year old almost never takes a nap, and she hasn't for over a year. My 2.5 year old always takes a nap, and I don't foresee him quitting anytime soon.

I would suggest moving her naptime to the morning (this is achieved easiest by waking her up just a little bit earlier in the morning) instead of the afternoon. Good luck!

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M.S.

answers from Portland on

I'm in the same boat here. I have found that my son skips naps just fine, so on day that I want him to go to bed easily, I skip his nap. When he does have a nap, we put him down between 11 and 12. My son gets up at 7 though. I recommend you put her down at noon.

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M.T.

answers from Honolulu on

Mine stopped about 2 and 1/2, then started going to daycare and they made her take one there and she did just fine. We moved and she is now 3 and 1/2 and she is home with me all day and will not go to sleep for anything. I cam make her go lay down for quiet time but the only time she will go to sleep is if we are in the car driving. She will bounce around at home to keep herself awake. Why she doesn't want to go to sleep I don't know unless she thinks that she will miss something.

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L.C.

answers from Seattle on

If she isn't sleeping at night...wake her up from her nap gradually earlier each week until she is broken of the habit of napping. Some kids/parents enjoy a later bed time if it means they have a bit of peace in the afternoon during a nap. I personally loved that 2 of my 3 kids weren't big nappers because they always went to bed early.

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T.P.

answers from Portland on

I will preface this by saying our wake up and naptime are the same as yours (8am and 1:30-3:30pm).

I don't know if it's the same for your daughter, but my 27m old has a window of time (we call it the sweet spot) where she will go down for bedtime easily. Through trial and error we have found that if we wait too long to put her down it takes her MUCH longer to settle down. It's like she gets over-tired and hyper. This is the same for naps and bedtime. I need to have her in bed by 1:30 (nap) or 8:30 (bed) or it can get ugly.

For a while we were getting down for naps closer to 2-2:30 and she had several days where she didn't nap at all. Once I got back to putting her down by 1:30 she got right back on schedule and is napping fine now. On nights when she's gone to bed around 9pm she sometimes is still awake until after 10, even though we know she is exhausted. But, when we have her in bed and lights out by no later than 8:15 she tends to settle down quite quickly most of the time. Even on the odd nights when it still takes her a while to settle down, at least we have started the process at 8pm instead of after 9 so she is asleep by 9 instead of after 10. I know it sounds counter-intuitive but she goes to sleep better (for nighttime AND naps) if I get her down BEFORE she shows big signs of tiredness. If I wait until she is yawning, eye rubbing and acting tired, it's too late.

So, to sum up my rambling post: I think you are putting her to bed too late after she's gotten over stimulated and hyper. I figure my daughter can't tell time yet so if it's after dark and I say it's bedtime, she'll go along with it not knowing if it's 8 or 9. As long as she has her usual nighttime routine, it won't matter to her.

Edited to add that I'm surprized I'm the only one to suggest an earlier bedtime!

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M.C.

answers from Bellingham on

Hi my little girl just recently stopped taking naps everyday. She is a little over three. It has always been a major battle to get her in bed at night, but when she was napping it would be 1030 or 1100 before I could get her down and this is starting at 900 or 930.

She is a little harder to deal with during the day now because she is tired and if she is just horrible, I make her take like a thirty min nap. It is just enough to keep her going without me staying up forever to get her to bed.

She has been getting into bed around 830-900 now. I still battle her but it is alot shorter now LOL.

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M.M.

answers from Anchorage on

My daughter was 3 in October. She was napping about 1.5 - 2 hrs. in the afternoon and sleeping about 9 - 10 hrs. at night most of her 2nd year. We usually had her down by 9 but she would often talk to herself until 10 or 10:30. She would wake up about 7. She started skipping naps some last summer but would be a complete crank in the evening. On her own about Thanksgiving she started sleeping in until 9 and then it was easy to skip the nap and she began to consistently sleep 12 - 13 hrs. at night.
Like everyone else said I think this varies widely by child. You could try skipping the nap and see how she does. I think it's also a decision for you on which time you need the break more; afternoon nap or an early evening. I tried keeping up with a quiet time for her to play in her room but she would often fall asleep (usually at the end of it!) When we first started missing naps last summer she would do fine until about 4 and 4-6 was the hardest time (and the most inconvenient to have a cranky child with dinner prep and all). During the worst of the transition I let her watch some TV during that time. It let her relax and zone out but she wouldn't fall asleep. If I read to her she would just curl up and zonk out in my lap. Good luck. I've also noticed that it comes and goes so your daughter may do fine without a nap for a few weeks or month and then revert. As soon as you think you have a schedule figured out it changes again! I think the thing to remember during the nap transition period is flexibility! :-)

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T.K.

answers from Seattle on

Jesse,
I wanted to respond to you b/c I jsut went thru my son giving up naps. He is now 3-1/2 but he stopped wanting to nap right after his 3 yr. Bday. It was so frustrating b/c I thought most kids napped until age 4 or so and of course I wanted him to be well rested and it gave me a much needed break too. (I have a 1-1/2 yr. old as well)
So I decided to try not napping him and putting him to bed early. His normal wake up time is around 6:30 a.m. Without a nap, he was exhausted by the evening time , so I put him to bed at 6:30p.m. I know it seems so early, but he slept a full 12 hrs and still does. It's actually really nice to have an early bedtime because it gives my husband and I some great time together before we go to bed. From my experience, if I put my kids down too late, they wake up earlier!
You could try not napping Alyssa for one day an putting her to bed around 8p.m. and see what happens. Maybe she will take a few naps a week instead of every day.
good luck!

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M.D.

answers from Seattle on

I have four kids, and they were all different about giving up their naps. One took them until she started kindergarten, another gave them up before she was three. I wouldn't move it to the morning. Try shortening it first, waking her up about ten minutes earlier every few days until it's more like an hour and 15 mins. See if that is enough to give her some rest but not keep her up later. Do you have a good bedtime routine where she has plenty of time to wind down in the evening? My husband has always gotten home fairly late ( 6:45 or so), so if I tried to put my kids down earlier than 8:30, they were usually too worked up from having daddy time. Also, don't let her eat too close to bedtime. If she's still giving you trouble at bedtime, I agree with trying to go without. Some kids just don't require as much sleep. But even with mine that gave it up at 2 1/2, I still had her take a quiet time where she was required to stay in her room for an hour on her bed. She could play quietly with toys, look at books, listen to music. They still need a little down time even if they don't sleep. Good luck!

L.U.

answers from Seattle on

J. - Can your child survive the day without a nap? That's what I had to finally look at. My first son stopped taking a nap when he was 5! I know, that seems forever, but he needed it. My second son stopped napping right about the time he turned 2! What a difference children are. I think it just depends on the child. It may be nice to take naps away and push her bedtime up a bit, having her go to bed around 7:30 or 8pm. See how she does.
Good Luck, L.

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K.M.

answers from Seattle on

All kids are different, so keep in mind that what one does, the other may not. My kids were very different about their sleep needs - ds needed more sleep and took naps until he was about 3.5yrs. Dd gave up regular naps when she was just over 2yrs.

There are a few routes you can follow...you can wean the maps slowly (a VERY good route, IMO); you can take it away all at once (spooky, but she may be ready), or you can leave it alone and continue to be frustrated.

Has she gone without her naps? If so, does she seem that she should have had one? It's a real disappointment to the parent when that guaranteed time goes away, but the 2 hours of napong during the day is turning into 2 hours of sheer frustration at night. As another mom suggested, I would shorten her naps to about one hour for a couple of weeks. If she's still fussing at night, then you may have to dump the naps except for those occasional exciting days where she's really tuckered out.

The deal you make with her then is quiet time. Ideally while your younger one is sleeping. Good luck!

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M.D.

answers from Portland on

Hi J.,

You might want to leave your little girl's nap schedule alone and just work on getting her to bed earlier (like by 8PM). It sounds almost like she is overtired when you put her down at night, which would cause her to stay awake for a long time (I know because I've had a lot of fun on the sleep front with my son). It is REALLY hard to get an overtired child to go to sleep (counter-intuitive, but unfortunately that's the way these little bundles work). I'd also look at whether or not she's getting sick, or whether or not she's going through some developmental milestones. Sickness and brain development have always impacted sleep with our son. Try to hang on to the nap as long as you can - you both need that time!!!

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D.W.

answers from Indianapolis on

We have the exact same problem with our 3 year old son. He's a few months older. We can't keep him awake at nap time, but bedtime is a HUGE struggle.

We have him in day care, so he is forced to have nap/quiet time. He always sleeps at least 1.5-2 hours while the teachers tend to other things. We usually try to limit his nap on the weekends, but we're not doing well with that.

We have a neighbor whose son is almost 4 and hasn't taken naps in almost a year. He's also really cranky and difficult to be around sometimes. I'm guessing 4 is probably pushing it on the naps. We'll likely be trying to limit them as our bedtimes are completely inconsistent and get later and later all the time.

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A.D.

answers from Portland on

I'm with Tracy P, who suggests an earlier bedtime.

With kids and sleeping, consistency and making sure they aren't sleep deprived is best.

Right now, my daughter wakes at 8:30am (like clockwork! I swear I could use her as an alarm). I have found that it works best to put her down to sleep at 1pm. She sleeps for 2hours. Then she goes to bed at 8pm.

If I mess with this at all, she doesn't go down well for her nap, and she doesn't go down well for night. She'll still wake at the same time in the morning, tho, which means she gets less sleep, and which means she gets off even more.

Try waking her in the morning at the same time everyday. Try putting her down for her nap and at night at the same time everyday.

OH! Another thing I've noticed: Now that my daughter is older and can walk/run, if my daughter doesn't get outside and isn't as active or doesn't interact with other kids enough, she doesn't get rid of her pent-up energy and doesn't go down as well because she's bored/not tired. I've found that making sure she spends lots of time playing with other kids or playing at a park/etc helps a lot.

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