What's Wrong with Me? - Hialeah,FL

In Houston there is a Dianetics Center- you will find out why you went back, and how to change or leave.
There is a reason, and handling that will help you. I am alive today because of them. I know this works.
What more data. send me a message.
best, k

You wanna fix what is wrong with you? Get rid of him.

C.,

Have you considered what is WRONG with your husband?

What kind of person are you? Are you a nice woman, good mother, and have tried to be a good wife? You left and came back 4 times. Did you do that because he convinced you that you are "nothing" without him?

Are you afraid of this man? Are you able to get to family or friends where he can't find you? If not try this place:

Women's Shelter Of Hope Inc
150 E 1 Avenue
Hialeah, FL - 33010
###-###-####

You may not be physically abused, but your husband is doing a number on your head. Set yourself and your children FREE. Please let us hear from you.

Blessings....

Sweetie -you need to Take back your life! He's probably not going to change but you can. You are responsible for your own happiness not him. Why dont you talk to your family? If they are good people reconnect with them! Why dont you have friends to talk to? Go to the park and chat with other moms dont let anything stop you. Would you like to go to Church, my church is like an extended family they care about me and my whole family. Take some time to work on you, make your self stronger and happier, THEN start looking at your marriage. Of course it's scary being alone with four children that alone would make you want to go back to him, it doesnt mean anything is wrong with you and he is the father of your children. But make your self the strong happy independent woman your children can look up to and respect. Do it for them. First work on you and your happiness then start to figure out if you want to work on making your marriage better. Then see if he can love a woman like that or if he cant handle it and will have to go find someone weak and timid, someone he can intimidate and keep quietly at home. Dont be that woman. He's not worth losing your self.

Something is wrong with HIM.
Not you.
Know this difference.

You need to get away from him.
For good.

He is a toxic jerk.

Do not let your kids, continue to see him devalue you. That is not good for kids. YOU are their Mom. A child should grow up, knowing that a WOMAN is valued and that their Mom is, valued.

You would not want them to grow up, getting a man like that for themselves, would you?
So think about that.
He is harming, the kids, TOO.
He is a harmful role-model for them.

God loves you, C.. You need to love you too.

You are insecure and don't believe you can get any better. You say he does everything for the kids but apparently not. If he did, he would help you take care of them. he has no right to talk to you that way and you let him. Only YOU can take care of YOU and respect YOU. You have to earn and command the respect and if you don't, this jerk won't do it. Each time you leave you take a step up the ladder. Sometimes it takes awhile but in the end we women usually smarten up. It is up to you how long it takes you to leave, how much disrespect you think you 'deserve'. I dated a jerk once for SIX years. wow, what a waste of my time I could have been with someone that treated me nice. He is abusing you mentally and emotionally. Tell him to "shut up" and you will see him in court for child support!

There is nothing wrong with you. Sounds to me like he's very controlling and is doing whatever he can to make u feel guilty if u left him. Like "I do this for u" or "I earn money for u"... Well that's BS!!! Think about what he doesn't do for u... Does he tell u you're beautiful, or a great mom/wife...? That he can't live w/out u? That's what u deserve, and if he's not making u feel like the amazing woman that u are, then he doesn't deserve to be with u. He's got u "trained" to think that u couldn't do it on your own, but it sounds like you do all the kid duties on your own... There is a lot of assistance for single moms. U just have to believe u can do it. Don't let him determine yours and your kids happiness. U deserve more than how he's treating you... {{{hugs}}}

I know you might not want to listen to what I'm about to say, but if you do, you could possibly save your marriage. If you really want help with any issue, I mean if you really want help with it. You could do so by going to the Bible. Not just asking church and family members. But by going straight to the Bible yourself. Genesis 2:22-24:
And God proceeded to build the rib that he had taken from the man into a woman and to bring her to the man.

23 Then the man said:
“This is at last bone of my bones
And flesh of my flesh.
This one will be called Woman,
Because from man this one was taken.”

24 That is why a man will leave his father and his mother and he must stick to his wife and they must become one flesh. 25 And both of them continued to be naked, the man and his wife, and yet they did not become ashamed.
If you have a husbeand who doing supporting you financially, he's doing something right.
What I'm trying to say it is not unusually or wrong for him to want to spend time for you, maybe you guys as a family could do this more often. Families are much too broken up nowadays.
The first step you took was to ask what's wrong with me, which shows that you are trying to fix this marriage.
God designed marriage to bring a couple deep-seated joy and contentment. He intended for a man to “rejoice with [his] wife” and for a woman to love her husband and to feel that her husband loves her as he does his own body. (Proverbs 5:18; Ephesians 5:28) To create that sort of bond, a couple must learn to trust each other. Equally important, they need to develop a lifelong friendship. When a man and woman earn each other’s trust and work at becoming the best of friends, their commitment to the marriage will grow. They will form a bond the Bible describes as being so close that it is as if the two people were “one flesh.”—Matthew 19:5.

I would figure that the reason why he doesn't like you going out by yourself is because he doesn't want you yo cheat on him. He simply doesn't trust you. So what you guys really have is a trust issue. And a weak relationship. So let him build up a relationship with you and love you and his kids. He's not beating you, saying nasty things or endangering you or your children. The family unit is the closest bond you'll ever share and it only comes once in a life time. And be invovled with a greater work that of instilling God and your children, especially your girls. If things don't work out let me know. But then too we all have things to keep working on. Remember that. Keep working on getting your kids to learn why drugs are bad and sex before marriage can lead to HIV and a host of sadnesses and illnesses that are sometimes incurrable. So, get the focus off of yourself, off your husband and put it on God and your kids. Take out your Bible and read with your kids every day and by yourself. These problems are very common in society today but remember these words. Jerimiah 10:23 :I well know, O Lord , that to earthling man his way does not belong. It does not belong to man who is walking even to direct his step. 2 Tim 3:16,17 All Scripture is inspired of God and beneficial for teaching, for reproving, for setting things straight, for disciplining in righteousness, 17 that the man of God may be fully competent, completely equipped for every good work.

My heart goes out to you. It seems to me he wants to totally control your world, like a total control freak. That does not make him a bad man, just a difficult one. Like you can have no outside thoughts or influences. You somehow must become C. again. Find something that you did or were interested in before a family and try to rekindle that interest. Do not let him scare you about the car. When he is going off about being careful just smile look at him and happily say (yes you can fake it) "okay I will'. The more you let it get to you the more control you are giving him. You are a competent woman you can drive! It is just he is trying to keep you scared. Look you can't do anything about the other drivers but you can obey the laws and be careful. That is all you can do. That time in the car is yours. Making you own decisions. And just to catch him off guard you should do the laundry. If he asks tell him it is you job, I would love not to have do it. But it is a way he controls you. Take it away. Good Luck to you. Let us know how you are doing. From one Super Mom to another. There is no tougher job!

If he's such a big jerk, I do not understand why you had 4 kids with a jerk. I don't understand why people do this! And, why are you not talking to your parents? You can't blame him for not picking up the phone and calling them. The next time you pick up the phone to talk to his parents, why don't you dial your own parents number?!

You've put up with this foolishness for so long that its going to be hard for you to put your foot down and for him to accept you putting your foot down. If you dont want to leave (for good), and you want to stay with your husband then some things are going to have to change. If you want to go somewhere by yourself then go. Dont let his nagging about the car crashing get to you...get dressed, get the keys and walk out of the door. Tune him out and get to steppin'! He is doing and saying these things so he can control you and get you to do what he wants. I think this should be your first bid for freedom (mentally and physically). Plan a day for yourself. Go to the movies or go to the flea market. Since you havent spoken to your parents in a while, invite your mom to go with you. After you plan, follow thru with your plan. I know you can do this!

You either need to stand up to him or get out.
Only you can figure out which one you want to do.
If you want to stay - get some backbone and stand up for yourself.
If you want to get out -- get out and stay out.
While he is at work today, call your mother. Ask for advice and help.
When he comes home tonight, get in the car and go somewhere - even if it's around the block. It doesn't matter what he says, just do it.
Baby steps or giant steps --- your choice.
LBC