What Is Your Elementary Age Kids' Bedtime?

My kids are 12 and 9. They are showered and in their rooms at 8pm, every single night, even SUMMERS. They dont have to go to sleep, but they must stay in there and not bug us...lol! They don't have tv's but they can listen to music, read, color, play with toys, play their instruments, etc. We have been doing this for YEARS and it works great. Most nights, they are asleep by 8:30, rarely are they still up past 9. They get up on their own around 6:30. I have never had to wake them up, they always get up on their own. I think it helps to stay on the same schedule, that way everyone knows what to expect and things go smoothly. Good luck.

The goal is 8:30, but truthfully thats the time we start getting ready for bed. They are actually down by 9. It's more because we are busy than anything else. I'd love to put them down earlier! But time wont allow.

Most nights we start bedtime around 7 for my 1st grader, so she'll be asleep by 7:30. She gets up around 6 or 6:30 each morning. Some nights she doesn't go to bed until 8 or rarely 8:30. We have the same bedtime all week b/c my daughter really needs the sleep. I know several of her friends go to bed around 8.

I think it varies greatly by child. Both of my kids need lots of sleep. So do I, but my husband runs on fumes. Many of my kids' friends do fine on less sleep.

My youngest is 8, and he goes to bed at 7:00 most school nights. He wakes up on his own at about 6:00am. That works well for us since I teach, and have to leave for school by 6:30. I like to see him before I leave. Occassionally he stays up until 8:00 on school nights, but if it does that too often he gets grumpy. On the weekends he can stay up until 8:00, but he can rest during the day or go to bed early the next night if needed.

My teenager needs lots of sleep, too. Bedtime is 9:30 for him on school nights, but no set time on weekends. He's very good at regulating himself. When he gets tired, he goes to sleep.

The experts say 10 hours, but reality is many kids don't get that much sleep if they participate in sports or have alot of homework.

I have friends with kids in upper elementary (4th -6th grade)who only get 8 hours or less of sleep because their kids don't get to bed until 9 or later if they are in athletics or they have too much homework. They go to private school, so I don't know if this makes a difference.

My kids get 10, but like Riley, we homeschool too.

My (9yo) son has almost always gotten between 10 & 12 hours, although, since we homeschool... it's on a slightly different timeframe than most people.

CURRENTLY... he's on steroids that give him insomnia. He's not able to get to sleep until 11pm-1am (better than it was! It used to be MUCH later, oy). He then gets up between 10am & noon.

HISTORICALLY ...
... spring and fall 9pm, up at 730am
... summer 10pm, up at 830am
... winter 6pm, up at 5am ((we're a snow sport family))

_____

When "My friends get to blah blah blah" (WHATEVER it is, and there will be a lot, since families are different and have different needs)... I always use that as an opportunity to talk about differences. There are LOTS of reasons why some kids go to bed later (some still nap, others get up later, some are on meds... just for a few examples), and some kids go to bed earlier. Whether it's bedtimes or birthday parties or vacations or custody... whatever comes up... I have my son think about different reasons why what THEY DO IS BEST FOR THEM, and what we do is best for us. I usually start him off with a few examples. I also usually bring up things that could CHANGE 'what's best for us'.

YOU decide what time they go to bed. Not your kid.
Kids will always try and get away with it and want to go to bed later.

How old is your child?
Kids, yes, they need at least, 10 hours per night. But in conjunction with everyday life, and homework and what not, that is not always possible. And yes, kids need to get up at 6:30am, the next day, for school. Mine too.

My kids are 5 and 9 years old. They BOTH... go to bed, BY 8:30. 8:00pm ideally. We start to wind them down, from 7:30.
They do not battle about it.
When I KNOW they are overtired or more tired on some days, I tell them... and then that night we get them ready for bed, earlier.
WE gauge that. Not them.
I explain to them though... in a matter of fact way. And they don't battle about it. I tell them their "symptoms" of being over-tired, and how it just makes them fussy/cranky and they get bags under their eyes. And they get it. They don't battle about bed.

My son for example, who is 5... is very tired today. Thus, I explained that to him, and explained that tonight he is going to bed earlier. He needs it. And I tell him "you know yourself, you are tired. Its not a bad thing to say... so you need more rest." And that's that. He understands. And he goes to bed.
I do that with my daughter too, when she is especially tired on some days. I can tell that about them.

Tip: start the bedtime routine/winding down for it, AHEAD of time. PRIOR to the actual bed time. I do this, 1 hour before my kids actual bed time. Then they don't get to bed late. Or later.

An overtired kid... gets more fussy and cranky and can't function at school the next day. I see this myself, everyday. I work part-time at my kids' school. I KNOW when the kids are just tired and did not get enough sleep. They stare into space, don't concentrate well, don't listen well and are tired and droopy. I even ask them "did you sleep late last night?" and they say "yah, I'm tired."
Tell your Husband that. Teachers... KNOW what kids do not get enough sleep. It shows up, in school. The next day.
AND... lack of sleep just compounds and dominoes into the next day.
For my kids, it takes them 1-2 days, just to catch up on their sleep.
And if kids have a habit of sleeping late on weekends, then come Monday... they are TIRED. And cannot make up for their lack of sleep already. Because, now it is another weekday, Monday. And then the vicious cycle of lack of sleep... just continues.

My kids are 6 1/2 and 8. They go to bed no later than 8pm and usually get up between 6:30 and 7:30... If I can get them in bed some nights at 7:30 I do it, especially toward the end of the week.

I agree with the experts--kids need sleep. My boys are 6, 4, and 1. They all go to bed between 7:30-8.

wow...I feel like a mean mom! My 5 and 7 year old go to bed at 7:30 and wake up at 7. They don't always fall asleep right away but they wind down. They are always tired by the end of the night and half the time fall asleep on longer car rides, running around after school! They know they have an earlier bed time than some but I tell them every kid andfamily is different

Ideally, you need to put them to bed early enough that they get enough sleep and wake up on their own in time to get ready for school. For us, that means 8:00. Since that hardly ever happens, I usually wake up our son and he sleeps in (a little bit) on the weekends.

It's really about how much sleep your daughter needs!

Our daughter always needed more sleep than the norm so I couldn't go by what others did. Whatever time it took for our daughter to wake up on her own, determined the time she went to bed. We just had to try a half hour earlier every night until we found the right time. If she had to be woken up in the morning, it was not going to go well, but if she woke on her own, everyone was happy that morning! In high school, she had to go to bed at 9pm! She would be horrified if any of her friends found out, so we just made it a rule that we took no phone calls after 9pm. Her friends just thought we were too strict. So what - her cell phone was turned off and our daughter got her sleep. She was able to handle the crazy schedule of those years very well because she was well-rested. Of course there were times when she didn't get to bed on time because of "life," but those were the exceptions and we just dealt with those days when they happened.

My 5th grader was going to bed at 9:30 when she was in 4th grade. She got up around 6:45 in the mornings.

This year we are "homeschooling" so she and her brother go to bed much later (10:30-11:00pm), but they also don't get up until 8:00 or later, usually. My 5th grader is an early riser (from my husband's genetics I suppose, lol) and sometimes is up around 7:00 or 7:30 without an alarm or someone waking her.
I agree that 8:00 pm is rather early at her age. Some kids need more sleep than average. Some need less than average. Have you tried letting bedtime slide back to 8:45 or 9:00 just to see how/if it affected her? Like you said: "elementary kids need an AVERAGE of 10 hours of sleep"... some don't need the full 10. My son does and always has (he is a teen now and in 8th grade). My daughter rarely does.

one of the nicest things about homeschooling was that the boys could pretty much set their own bedtimes.
:)
contrary to what 'everyone' says, you don't have to get up early every day to 'learn' how to do it. my all-over-the-map sleepers are both fine with holding down full-time work and college.
of course, that doesn't work for traditional school schedules. but it's very nice not to have that particular battle to fight.
as for how much, at least 8 hours, and 10-12 when they were teenagers.
khairete
S.

I agree with Gidget: different kids need different amounts of sleep. You should aim for a standard of "about" 10 hours, but it may be a little more or less. Just like adults: I sleep 6 hours, but could probably benefit more from 7. A friend of mine is a bit crazy with the sleep thing in my opinion, and thinks she "needs" a minimum of 10 hours. That hurts my head to even try to process; half the day is gone!
My son is 5. He goes to bed at 8:30, gets up on his own at 6:30, but also takes a nap most of the time. He always has some quiet time during the day. Sometimes that turns into a nap, sometimes it turns into him playing with his hotwheels or bear. He needs his quiet time / nap still because he's very active in the day, does kung fu, awanas, horseback riding lessons, etc. It's ok because he's not in kindergarten until next year. I figure if we need to do a little adjusting (making quiet time a little shorter or later), or going to bed just a little earlier, that's ok. He wouldn't need to get up until 7 for school once it starts next August. There's not really a standard of staying up later just because it's a weekend in our house. It may happen occasionally but it's not the norm.

My daughter never needed that much sleep. When she was a baby if she napped she;d be up to midnight. She has never gone to bed before 9p. OUr neighbor's kid goes at 9p evey day. Each kid is different. I would go by her cues and what she needs

I have always let my kids stay up as last as they want so long as they pop out of bed the next morning. Worked great with the older two, the younger two not so much. So since they won't get up it has been moved up to the point where it is 8 to 8:30.

I don't get the argument that their friends stay up later than them because it is totally within their control. You want to stay up later you better be more organized in the morning.

During the school year bedtime is 8:30 and they get up at 7:00. Anything less than that and my oldest (10) is moody. My youngest (8) could easily do 8:30 - 6:30, but to make my life easier they have the same bedtime/wake time. Oldest is a night owl, can't do an earlier bed time/wake time. Youngest is a morning person, could easily go to bed at 8 and get up at 5:30 - 6, but I work mornings and that's MY time, lol.

Mine are in bed at 8:30, asleep by 9, and up at 7am They are 11,6, and 4

My son is in kindergarten. Bedtime is 8:00, we get him up at 7:00. I don't think he goes to sleep for an hour or two on many nights, but there's little I can do about that.
Oh, there will be a day when they put themselves to bed, when they are teenagers. Trouble is you'll have to drag them out of it!

8:30 every night except weekends which is 9. The time change has my daughter messed up to where she is getting up at 6/6:30 but she does well in school and is not overly tired so I suppose for her she is getting what she needs. Typically the children do not need to get up until 7:30.

I really think it depends upon the child. I've often wondered if WHEN they were born has anything to do with it. Example, my son was born at 1:56 a.m. He has ALWAYS been a late nighter. Even when he was a toddler, he would never go to bed before 11:00 p.m. Now he is 7 and he goes to sleep at 9:30 p.m. and gets up at 6:30 a.m. This schedule works really well for him. He lays down between 8:30 p.m. and 8:45 p.m. to relax and watches t.v. until 9:30 p.m. Then it's lights out and he goes right to sleep. I don't have any trouble waking him up in the morning. He gets up and watches cartoons for 30 minutes, then eats his breakfast and gets ready for school. I think many people believe you have to go with the "standard" bed time, but I disagree. I think you need to base it on your child's individual needs.

my son is 7 almost 8 in the second grade, he goes to bed at 8:30 and gets up at 7am sharp. And yes he does sometimes put himself to sleep and we stick to that bedtime, he struggles on Fridays to stay up till 10pm...downside he is up every Saturday before 8am!

My grandkids get between 9 and 10 hours. They're 8 and 11 and are in bed by 9. Their bedtime was 8 until they were 8. The 11yo doesn't have to go to sleep right away. They 11yo can have a low light on and read until ready to sleep.

My ten year old son starts flossing, brushing his teeth and rinsing with a flouride rinse around 8 oclock. Bedtime is at 8:30 and he gets up at 6:00am. On the weekends, bedtime is around 10 or 11pm.

8:00 is a good bed time.

Bedtime 8:30p but they really don't go to sleep till about 9p and wake up at 7:45am M-T-W and 8:15am on TH (Stupid Late Start) so my 8 & 6 y/o sons get about 10.5-11.5 hours..give or take a bit.

I must confess I do allow them to stay up uber late on Fri & Sat night...they are good sleepers and it is just SO exciting to get to stay up to 10:30p or 11:00p!!

I feel they get enough sleep all the way around!

Our 6 yo first grader goes to bed at 8 p.m. sharp and wakes at 6:15 a.m.

i think 9 is a good bed time . try it out see if it works.

My son is 9, he goes to bed at about 9.30, my daughter is 4, she goes the same time - we get up at 6.30.
My kids have never needed much sleep unfortunately!

My friends son is 7, he goes to be around 8:30... My other friends son is 6 and goes to be at 8:30... Both get up at 6:30.... My son is 5.5 and goes to bed at 7:30ish (he gets up on his own by 6:30)

Our daughter in K, 7:30-8 and up at 7:30, so roughly 12 hrs.
Son in 6th grade, 8:30-9 and up at 6:30, so roughly 9 hrs.

My kids bedtime is 8pm on school nights, as they are up at 7am (ages 9,8,8 and 5), giving them a good 11 hours. Weekends and vacations its more like 9-9:30 but they can also sleep in if they choose. Extra special days, such as July 4th (fireworks here don't kick off til 9:15) when they have the chance of being up til midnight, a nap is mandated as they have NEVER slept past 8am and they tend to get grouchy without at least 9-10 hours of shuteye.

Ultimately, do what works best for your kids, regardless of their protests. Some kids do fine with 8 hours, while others need 12. Find out what they need, and adjust accordingly. It also sounds like you may need to have a family meeting to discuss the "why" to both the kids and the hubby.

My 8 yr old is in bed by 8pm up at 6:15am and the baby(2yrs) is in bed between 7:30-8pm up at 6:30am, but she naps during the day too. Any later than that and they are beasts the next day.

My 5th grader goes to bed between 8:30 and 9 and my 2nd grader goes to bed between 8 and 8:30. I am a stickler for bedtime.

My daughter is in 1st grade and goes to sleep at 10pm and wakes up at 7:30am for school. So she gets about 9 1/2 hours of sleep. If I put her to bed any early she is up in the middle of the night. She gets up well in the mornings and is never cranky. Whatever works for your child and this time works for my baby.

for 8yo: 8:30...but by the time she goes to sleep....9:00

My daughter is 5.5 and goes to bed around 9 (sometimes a little before and sometimes a little after). The weekends is around 10. She gets up for school around 7:15 and is out of bed by 7:30. She is fine as long as she gets 9 to 10 hours of sleep.

My girls are 6 and 7 and go to bed at 8:30 pm on school nights. I wake them up between 6:45-7:00 am. On the weekends, they can stay up until 9:30 or 10 pm, if they want to. My 7 year old always wakes up early-even on the weekends, no matter what time she goes to sleep. I need lots of sleep also. My 7 year old is an early bird and my 6 year old is a night owl-total opposites!! My 7 year old usually goes right to sleep, but my 6 year old has a hard time falling asleep.

my 9 year old is in bed between 8:30-9 every school night, with the exception of an occasional night where he might have a late baseball game. I strictly enforce the bedtime because he is up daily by 6:15 to have time to eat breakfast, get ready and get on the bus for school (School starts at 7:30am). He is also ADHD, so getting enough rest is imperative to his attentiveness in class.

Kids go to bed at 9pm. They don't have any that go to bed much earlier than that, I can't think of anyone that goes to bed before 8:30 actually.

Several of her friends have 10pm bedtimes and get up at 7.

My son just turned 9. He goes "to bed" at about 9 and is "asleep" by 9:30. Some nights are later. He's up by about 7:30-7:45 in the a.m.

My son usually goes to bed between 8:30 and 9:00pm. 9:30pm-10:00pm on sat/sun. He is up by 7am for school, and most weekends. He's 8.

8pm it will go up to 8:30 around 5th grade depending on if it is earned or not, then 9 in middle school - grades/attitude permitting and 9:30 in highschool and Jr/Sr year will be based on curfew vs bed time.

My kids are ready for bed between 7:30-8pm. They can play quietly in their rooms until ready to fall asleep. My kindergartner usually is asleep between 8-8:30. My 2nd grader usually falls asleep around 9. They get between 9-10 hours of sleep a night.

Mine are 1, 7, 8, and 9, they went to bed at 9 before school now that they are in school they go to bed at 8, get up at 7 we have a wind down time between 730 and bed time. my boys dont act like they need much sleep but buddy I can tell when they dont have enough.

My 6 yo old daughter is in first grade, and she has an 8pm bedtime, and she is up between 6:30-7am.

all of mine go to bed from 7:30-7:30......they are 7, 6, 4

During the school week my daughter, age 6, is in bed by 8:15 pm, gets to read until 9 pm, goes to sleep about 9:30 pm, and is up at 7:15 am.
On Fridays she gets to stay up until 9 pm but then she gets to read in bed until she falls asleep or 11 pm- which ever comes first (she always falls asleep first). Saturday nights is movie with Daddy so it's in bed at 9 pm and then they watch 1 movie together and then it's lights out.