I'm just wondering what other's opinions are. At about what age is it ok for you to let your child go outside and play without direct supervision? At what age is it ok for them to play a few doors down with strict rules about not going near the street etc. and popping your head out the door every few minutes to check on them?
We live in a townhouse complex so our neighbors are really close. I've never seen any parent outside with their children past the age of 4.They just let their children roam the complex. If my daughter is with older children that I know real well I will let her roam the complex with the older kids and I pop my head out the door and check on her every few minutes. Otherwise she is limited to the front porch or backyard. I want to give my daughter independance and everything and I also don't want to be a worry wart parent. I've had two and three year olds wonder over to my patio and I don't see the parents anywhere in sight so my neighbors are very carefree careless type of people.
I guess I'm in the minority but it'll be few years before my 5 yr old goes out alone anywhere but my back yard (or to a friends house when I take her there and pick her up). We have a nice subdivision with a lot of kids but I just don't see any reason to take chances with my girl (or my boy, who's 3) Maybe my kids will suffer with an overprotective mom bc I'm a juvenile prosecutor - it makes me a little more careful bc I know what kids (as young as 10 and younger, as well as adults) are doing out there.
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L.S.
answers from
St. Cloud
on
B....I say do what feels right to you and stick to it...there are no RULES...keep your child safe...thats it.
I see alot of kids running wild and it scares me for them and I often wonder what the parents are thinking...or maybe they aren't. I know a lady who's very young kids go out while she is sleeping during the day...she is now facing social services because her child is unattended...I don't thinks it is going to matter why it appears that your child is unattended...someone will think you aren't taking care of them...same as you think of your neighbors...just do what ever it takes to keep your babies safe...good luck and God bless
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J.
answers from
Minneapolis
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I would say it depends on 2 things- your child's personality/temperment, and your neighborhood. I live in a brand new development- only about 1/2 the lots have homes on them. It's just us and a new family across the street for 4 lots down, and a park on the other side. I let my almost 4 yr old daughter cross the street (I watch from the window) to play with her friend (who happens to be 3 months younger- how great is that!). I know all my neighbors, we have no traffic, and I have a pretty well-behaved child. I let the kids play in the back yard without me, but I have the sliding glass door open and I can hear and see them on the swings. It sounds like your neighbors may not be as trustworthy, though. Another thought: I used to be a licensed daycare provider in Washington County, and the rule for supervision was that children in Kindergarten and older could play outside without the provider being outside.
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A.H.
answers from
Minneapolis
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I myself live in a townhouse complex and I see the same things you do with the young kids running the streets and absolutly NO parents in sight! My son is almost 6 now and I do allow him to go outside to play with friends by himself as long as I know his friends are good kids, and he has strict boundries. When his friends are not available to play he is allowed to go out by himself but he has to stay right in the front yard where I can always see him from our livingroom window. The choices you make on your daughter should be based on how well she follows your rules and how comfortable you are with the other people in your neighborhood!!!
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J.S.
answers from
Minneapolis
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I just want to comment. I am a single mother and I live in a very small town and a close neighboorhood. I see kids from age 4 and up running around without parents. I do not agree with that. I have a 4 1/2 year old and a 6 1/2 year old and they do not leave my yard without me. At times, I will let them ride to a neighbors house, but only if I will be right behind them to make sure they got there. I just go with the saying "you can never be too careful."
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L.K.
answers from
La Crosse
on
Hi B.. I myself am a mother of a 5 yr old Bryana!!! You don't see that spelling too often do you :) I also have a 2 yr old son. In my case, I never let B go out without me because my 2 yr old is always going with her and he is not ready for unsupervised play or wandering. If I were a single mom of a 5 yr old like you I would still feel the same only because my daughter is WAY TO friendly. She will talk to anyone. I try telling her about stranger danger and that a stranger is ANYONE that mommy or daddy is not talking to. I may be over protective, but I use their play time as a time for me to get some of my outdoor work done....gardening, weeding, leaf and stick pick up. There is always something for me to do outside while they play. I say, better safe that sorry...it isn't like when we were kids....
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S.F.
answers from
Minneapolis
on
Hi B.. I have a 4 1/2 year old who I let play in the back yard or on the front porch but we have a strict rule... If she leaves our yard, she is in for the day and she has yet to break it. Of course she usually is outside w/a friend.
We are very fortunate that we live on a nice quite street w/a ton of kids and I feel comfortable with this. I do, however, check on her CONSTANTLY. I say go with your guts. Do what feels right to you.
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S.P.
answers from
St. Cloud
on
I live in an apartment complex that has 16 apartments. Across the parking lot is another complex identical to the one I live in. My kids are 6 and 8, and I let them play outside with the other kids, and I check up on them often. We have lived here for a year, and there is often kids (my girls' age) playing outside, and there is almost always at least one parent, if not a few of us that are outside. There is also a little park across the parking lot. I will allow my kids to go play at the little park, but they have to ask permission first and I check on them there too. Other than that, they are not allowed on the parking lot at all. They also must stay in the front of my building at all times. They have been wonderful at following my rules.
It didn't start out this way when we first moved here though. My husband and I had to get comfortable with the neighborhood and my kids had to earn my trust. We started out first with one of us having to be outside. Then we progressed to only in front of our big picture window, and so on.
I think it really depends on where you live, how your children behave, and how you feel. If you are not comfortable with it, don't do it.
There is a gas station less than a block from our apartment. I will not let my girls walk there without us. Other parents will send their kids once in awhile. It just all depends on what you are comfortable with, I think.
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J.R.
answers from
Minneapolis
on
I think it just depends on where you live. I live in the country on 5 acres and we have horses, cows and lots of fencing all around us. I have told my husband before that even with the fencing they probably won't play outside alone until they are 10 years old. I just don't think you can be too careful. Not only are there people but dogs and we have big bull snakes out here in Big Lake. We'll probably be fencing off the sides of our yard that aren't fenced here shortly and then it'll be a lot easier to let them out.
To be honest with you, if I were in a townhouse I would allow my child to play in the play area right behind or in front of the house, if I could watch out the window but not allow her anywhere else. You never know who your neighbors are and anyone could invite her in and then it's too late. Even older kids can't always be trusted around the little ones. I may be paranoid but at least my kids will be as safe as I can make them.
J.