My daughter is 16 and she went to the doc and the doc said my daughter's bmi is 89 and weights 157. My daughter is like 5" 5'. My daughter is not motivated by much and winter is coming. What can I do to get her motivated to drop some pounds and get healthier? My daughter thinks if you don't like me then don't look at me. She does not care what other people think of her. That's good and bad. I think it's good because she is confident in her body, but bad because she doesn't care.
Thanks!!
EDIT: We really don't have junk food at my house. I was thinking what 16 year old wants to do anything unless you're in sports and she really could care less about that. I plan on talking to her and seeing what she has to say. I didn't think about using the Wii. We have one and she can use that after she gets done with her homework.
The more you push the more she will rebell. She is 16 afterall lol. Is she involved with the family? Only carry healthy items in the house. Are you two close enough you could get her to go to an aeroibcs class with you? I do the wii at home the health one. Its funner.
Her BMI is in the 89th Percentile. Actual BMI would be around 26. This puts her in the overweight category but not obese. I would not make this about her weight at all. I would just make it about having a healthy lifestyle and you need to make this a family lifestyle...not targeting her. Lifestyle and healthy habits are what is important.
I am very active. I have 3 kids, 2 of which are active by choice and skinny by nature, the other does not like sports at all and has a different body type. The last couple of years I have just made it mandatory that everyone gets a certain amount of physical activity. It doesn't have to be strenuous but must be at least 30 minutes 4 -5 times a week and does not include PE at school (because I know from experience there are ways to avoid activity in a large class like that). The past few months my youngest has been riding his bike when I run and going to the gym with me to do weights. Other times it has been walking the dog, swimming. As long as he gets his time in somehow and is eating reasonably I leave the rest alone.
You cannot motivate any one to do anything. You can provide a good example, you can offer healthy meals and keep junk out of your house, you can be active and encourage her to join you or join a sport. For something so personal, you are a support person only.
My kids and their friends love the "Just Dance" "Dance Dance Revolution" and so on. You can get them for the XBox as well as Wii, etc... They burn energy like crazy!! :) Also, on the Wii, you can get Wii Sports it has tennis, etc.. It motivates like crazy and it's hecka fun!.... She can have friends over and make it even more fun. There are so many interactive games out there. I saw a news story about a year ago where a school was having indoor dance competitions (on the Wii) because they didn't have the facilities for outdoor gym/p.e. classes. Do not get Wii Fit - it inaccurately (in mine and many others' opinion) says that you're overweight and obese when the person clearly is not.
Anyway, this is a fun and tricky way to get kids to get moving without calling it exercise. :)
I'm not much taller than your daughter and even my BMI isn't 89 and I weigh a hundred pounds more (I'm 5'9" & 254lbs with a 37.5 BMI). I think the doctor did not measure her right at all. Plus she still has some years before she is fully grown and her metabolism changes to reflect that.
At her age, you need to be careful how you address the issue. The focus needs to be on healthy and not how she looks or weighs. Her diet needs to focus on putting healthy food in and don't police the amounts of it. She just needs to keep active and exercise in ways that are fun and encourage fitness without focus on losing weight. Doing it together can be fun and won't seem like you think she's fat or ugly in any way.
Eating disorders suck which is part of my problem now. I had people calling me fat in high school which lead to anorexia and then bulimia when people noticed how little I was eating. I managed to get things better when I was pregnant with my son as I wanted to focus on giving him a healthy mom during and after my son was born. I was doing great for years until my son's mental health got really bad and I was pregnant with my daughter. I could barely keep down anything and was on bedrest. The really healthy meals I used to cook got were pushed aside for convenience. Then I got into eating when I was stressed especially junk comfort foods from there since I couldn't do anything on bedrest and my weight from constantly throwing up was a big concern.
Once the baby was born in the NICU and my husband and my son had different major mental issues bubble up at the same time and I just gave up on caring that the food was mostly junk or not having enough time to focus on myself. It wasn't until this past year I could and had to focus on myself again. By then I realized I had gained an extra 50lbs since my daughter was born and hadn't lost any of the baby weight. Now I'm struggling to lose the weight in a healthy manner, not relapse into my anorexic or bulimic tendencies, and still love myself extra pounds and all. Once you have food issues and an eating disorder everything is so much harder.
I understand your point about winter coming. Last year, my whole family signed up for a 4 week ski lesson/skiing program. For 4 weeks in a row we spent the entire day skiing. My kidsl oved it so much they didn't want to stop to eat. It changed our whole winter because we were outside, getting some sun and fresh air. I don't know if there is anything like that near you, but some kind of outdoor sport that is kid/teen friendly would be ideal. I've heard that our little ski hill is the big junior high hangout on Friday nights. We're not at that age yet, but I can think of worse places for the kids to go. The trick with outside activity in the winter is to dress appropriately. No one likes to be cold or wet. Maybe ice skating? What do her friends like to do? Good luck.
Why not try to do something that both of you can do? I know most 16 year olds don't want to hang out with mom, but if it's something both of you can do, then it's easier to motivate her since both of you will have to do it. Say join a gym, where both of you can take classes. My mom and I work out at least once a week together and even though we are much older, 36 and 58, it's fun to have someone to go with. Zumba classes are fun for everyone, check if there's anything like that. Good luck!
One thing that I read that helped kids was that they have a small serving of each food and then wait 20 minutes to have more. During that 20 minutes they do something physically active (even if just going up and down the stairs a few times). If they are still hungry after that amount of time, then they have more.
Also to increase fruits/veggies they tried a new one each week and then voted on if it was good or needed to be prepared in a different way.
You could also start a new thing of going on walks with her to talk about her day and what's going on with her. It will serve two purposes, strengthening your relationship and getting her moving.
She's 16. There's not a whole lot you can do about it now.
As a woman who has been overweight since I was 9, please do not be pushy about this. Love who for exactly who she is. She will change it if she wants to. Your job is to love/support her. I know you mean well, but she's practically an adult, and if she doesn't want to change, she won't.
Um, her BMI is not 89. I didn't figure out what it is, but it is definitely not 89. Even the morbidly obese have BMI's in their 30s.
Why not just encourage your daughter to get more activity and eat a bit more nutritiously without doing anything too drastic? It's great that she's confident in herself. You just want to make sure she's healthy. Do you have a dog? If so, add walking the dog at least 30 minutes a day to her chores (one, two or three walks...however she wants to divide it). Check your weekly grocery purchases and reduce or eliminate sweets and junk food coming into the house.
i would say the best thing you can do is to be a good role model for her. if you're doing that it's easier to encourage her to work out and eat better too. i was always large as a child and gained a lot of weight at puberty, college, and beyond...but i always remembered my mom watching what she ate, and exercising all the time. so now i do too. it took a long time though. i do wish my mom had talked more about it - had fewer snacks in the house involving processed carbs, and more fresh fruits and veggies (crackers are my downfall!) now i snack on celery, carrots, and broccoli, maybe a boiled egg or apple or banana. it all starts with mom, unfortunately. lol.
When I was 15, I went to my first Jazzercise Class and loved it. I stayed with it for several years until I had some foot injuries that made jumping around no longer fun.. What about Zumba, that is another fun class I have taken.. Does she like music? in those classes, I have found that there are all kinds of shapes and sizes.. if you find a good instructor, the class can be so much fun.. I also used to LOVE rollerskating. now, I know nowadays, it's harder to find a rink, but if you do happen to have one where you live, that can be fun and friends can join in..
good luck
Does she like to dance? Dancing is an excellent form of exercise. Encourage her to put on some music and dance.
Also teach her portion control and to eat smaller meals, more often. Rather than 3 big meals per day, maybe 5 smaller ones. Also, only eat until you are satisfied, not full. If you eat until you are full, you are stretching your stomach out and it takes more to fill it up the next time. If you stop when you're satisfied, no stomach stretching and it take less for you to feel satisfied.
BTW, I'm glad your daughter says she doesn't care what others think, but most 16 year olds do. Do you think she's just saying she doesn't care because she's afraid she may not be able to lose the weight? I think she needs a lot of encouragement and support.
