Hello to all! So here goes, I have two children from my first marriage, my daughter is 13 and my son is 10. I am getting married this August to a man who is wonderful to my children, I am very blessed. We have been together 7 yrs, and we have a 1.5 year old son together. My question is, I would like my children to give me away at the wedding, and I am not sure what is the correct way to do this or if this even something I should do. Should all three of them walk me down the aisle or just the older two? They will all also be part of the ceremony, the older two are jr. bridesmaid/groomsmen, and the youngest will be the ring bearer. I plan on talking to my pastor about this as well, but just wanted to get some ideas from all of you! Thanks in advanced! :)
Thank you all so much for all of the help, it gives me a lot of ideas to think about! I think it will be special no matter what we do! The most important thing is to me is that we have my kids blessings- and I know we do! :) Thanks again!
Do it however you want to! I think it's good to get them ALL involved, it helps consecrate the blended family.
I've seen this done a lot for 2nd weddings. You can have the older ones walk you down the aisle or just stand up for you (which you say they're doing anyway as jr. attendants). Since the youngest is the ring bearer -that's all he needs to do. It's really up to you as to how you want to do it!
There is no correct or incorrect way. It is however you and your fiance want it to be. That said, I wouldn't count on the youngest to 'perform' as expected. Toddlers are notorious for freezing at wedding ceremonies, breaking into tears and otherwise disrupting the proceedings. Have a back up plan for ring bearer. Congratulations.
I had two sons before I married a wonderful man, and we had a lovely wedding.
I don't think it's appropriate for your children to give you away, because they are not giving you away! Unless your two children are leaving with their father and you are starting a new life with your baby and new husband! Walk alone or have someone else give you away.
There are other ways to incorporate them into the ceremony. My toddler was the ring bearer, my 7 yr old was a groomsman. My husband turned to each of them after saying his vows to me and said vows to each of them. My older son welled up with tears and almost hugged him (but was too conscious of the solemnity and all the faces around) and my toddler was sitting with the guests chowing down on M&Ms! It was all very sweet.
You could have them each say a prayer, sing a song, offer a benediction, quote a verse or poem, give a flower or you give them a gift--there are lots of ways to incorporate them, but I just think they should walk the aisle before you, not to give away.
JMHO!
Good luck!!
Who says weddings have to be traditional. This is the 2000s anything goes. I say if that is what you want go for it. Make it your own and do what makes you and your family happy. I think it is a wonderful idea and I'm sure the children will love it as well.
Congrats!!! :)
Its your wedding and I think you should do whats important to you.
have daughter, walk behind you and hold/help you with your train throughout your ceremony, and let your son escort you, something else you can do is let your dd help you get ready, and help you throughout the ceremony...helping with train, putting the flower's in your hair, helping you put your shoes on, zipping your dress, etc, my dd did all this (put my tiara and veil in my hair) it meant the world to both of us and my dh saw my crooked tiara (6yr old did) and adjusted it which was even more special....(symboled him gladly helping me fix her mistakes----which he does wonderfully)
they are not "giving you away" I would see that more as a symbol of their acceptance of your new husband and SUPPORTING you to be with him. You walking down with them is a symbol of independence from you
or have 1 walk you half way and the other, the rest...but i think the first thought would be pretty (jmo)
congrats and do what's special to you and your new family, make it YOURS
CONGRATS!! We're getting married in June, and I wanted to include my daughters in the ceremony. Because we're not having bridesmaids and groomsmen, I'm going to have one daughter hold my bouquet and the other daughter hold the rings. The baby will (hopefully) be sitting quietly with a family member. It was important to us to include the girls because in a sense, my fiance is dedicating himself to them too. Best wishes!!
My baby sister just got married this past August, she has played a HUGE role in my son's life and a special tribute was made to my son during the ceremony (he has many complex needs), well my son, my mom and my dad walked my sister down the aisle, I was a bridesmaid and my twin daughters were flower girls.
For my wedding back in '02, my son was 3 and he was my ring bearer. The most important thing to remember is that it is you and your soon to be husband's day, don't worry what other people will think, it is about your new families memory.
I think you all need to sit down and decide together how each member of your family should be involved in the wedding. Obviously, the youngest wouldn't really have an opinion, but your older two definitely are old enough to be involved in the decision. Everyone is being united on this day! I really like the idea of the unity sand! What an beautiful symbol of the union! Congrats to you and best of luck!
Very cute! Since the older two know what's going on and can enjoy the memory of walking you down the isle I would do that! The baby as a ring bearer is perfect at his age. Best wishes.
I'd have your older two walk you down the aisle and have the little O. be the best man!
Yeah, I don't really like the idea of the kids 'giving you away' it should be more about you are all uniting as a family together and having them 'give you away' may be confusing for them. Walking you down the isle is a great idea and having some part of the ceremony be about all of you would be nice too. Just my thoughts.
You can 'give yourself away'. Instead of having the kids walk you down the aisle do a unity sand ceremony with the kids. Each child and you and your new hubby get a different colored sand and alternately pour the different colors into a jar. This shows the family now joined and can never be separated. I am sure you can find examples online, check youtube.
The tradition of a father giving his daughter to the groom is that he is transfering his headship and authority over her to her new husband. Your children do not have the authority or place to be giving you away. They are not actually leaving the equation, but rather are uniting together in the marriage. I think that having them have the other roles you mentioned are perfectly fine. I would not have them give you away because that would indicate that they are no longer part of the unit that will be your new family. I assume your pastor will tell you all of this, but maybe not. :)
you dont mention your father; is he no longer living or something?
i guess i would say when the pastor asks "who gives this woman to this man" or what not, your children could all say "we do" or something
talk to the kids and see what they say about it. kids sometimes have the best ideas.
im sure you'll figure it out. it would be cute to have your son give you away; and your daughter as the maid of honor (is your maid of honor married? than she can be matron of honor instead? your daughter could be young maid of honor? something like that?)
