Weaning from Bottle - Cleveland, TX

A 17 month old IS a baby. However, the bottle will be harder to take away the longer you wait. It really should be gone by now. I'd hold and cuddle her at bedtime and sing her a song and then put her in bed and if she cries for her bottle tell her no. If you have to, give her a sippy cup instead, but cut out the bottle from nap times for three days to a week and then cut it out from night time as well.

When I was weaning a baby in daycare he cried terribly for it at naptime but he had to learn to sleep without it.

S.

Treating her like a baby will only hurt her. Your husband needs to realize that she is no longer a baby, and that she needs to grow up. You will end up with a spoiled rotten little brat that will not listen to anyone.
I have seen so many kids with parents that feel as your husband does. "This is my last baby, so I will keep them a baby as long as I want to." WRONG!!! That kid is going to grow up whether he wants her to or not.
I'm sorry about being so blunt, but this is something I feel very strongly about. Your husband us doing your daughter more harm than good. She needs to be taken off the bottle. Play & simple.
Good luck

This was the exact story with my youngest sister (who is much younger than me) my dad kept giving her bottles. The longer you wait, the harder it will be. She was still having a bottle at night time when she was 3!

We got rid of bottles cold turkey when my daugther was 12 months. We just switched to sippy cups, she still had her binki (we got rid of that a few months after) and she was just fine. Just explain (in her words) that bottles are for little babies and we don't use them anymore. And then dont' give them to her. Its as simple as that. Its not like she can get up and make one herself.

Others may think that is too harsh. Perhaps you can skip it at nap for a while, and do nighttime or vise versa. What happens when you start potty training and she is taking a drink to bed? That doesn't work!

Good luck!

I know it must be hard when the last baby is on the verge of no longer being a baby, but it is psychologically unhealthy to try to keep a child at a certain developmental stage for selfish reasons. Personally, I would just take the bottle away. It will be difficult all around for a few nights, but I experienced the same with sleep times. The first night was terrible, but by night 4 it was not an issue. You have to be more stubborn than the child!

ONE bottle of WATER at night shouldn't do any harm. Your husband seems to have a sweet bond with your children. I wouldn't do anything to take that away from him right now. I personally think that once a child is old enough to walk around, he/she shouldn't be walking around with a bottle or pacifier. But, that's just me. I know other cultures that even breastfeed their children until 3 or 4 years old. Ugh! I couldn't do that. If you were giving her a bottle all of the time, I think you would be hurting her developmentally. If you were giving her something other than water at bedtime after already brushing her teeth, then I think you could be hurting her physically. But, you're not. So, let him have a few more times with her that he seems to need, especially if it is your last. That's my thought.

I think your husband just enjoys the time he gets to spend with her. Suggest to him that they sit and read books together at bedtime; it will stimulate her language and cognitive abilities and give them bonding time.

As for the bottle, meet halfway. Pediatricians generally agree that bottles should be taken away at a year. There are sippy cups made by Gerber that have a soft rubber spout. Have him put the milk or water in that and offer it to her at the same time/place as the bottle (we heated the milk in the cup like we had with the bottle when we did our switch). Tell him not to make a big deal about it, just give it to her and tell her it is a big-girl cup that she gets now. Maybe make a big deal about buying it (when dad is not around) and have her look forward to using it that night. Let her pick the color. Good luck to you all!

If she doesn't take a pacifier to help soothe her during her sleeping and downtimes, then I say leave her on the bottle until 2 or 3. My little girl just got off the bottle onto a cup at 3 yrs old because she didn't take a pacifier and it was just her comfort during nap and bedtime. It's ok, there is no set rule and i don't see the hurry. It's not like she will go to kindergarden with a bottle in her mouth. ha. Water is good though because if she falls asleep on juice or milk, it might hurt her teeth....if you disagree though and really want her on a cup, try having her pick out her favorite cup with maybe a cartoon character on it. My little girl loves the Car movie and we found her some cars cups - never had a bottle since..it's been 3 weeks now with no bottle..yay;-) I do let take her cup to bed though and have a drink before nap and bedtime...and she has a blanket too. You may need to find a blanket or favorite stuffed toy, etc to help take the place of her bottle if you are determined to take it away from her too...good luck!! Mother of 3 yr old girl and 1 yr old boy.

At 17 months it really is past time for him to be off the bottle.
I am a mother of a 2 year, 4 month old boy.
We found that it was not very difficult at all to convert him off of the bottle.
What you should do when you get ready to put her down for a nap or to go to bed. Initially, until your confidence is built up, prepare a bottle and prepare a sippee cup with milk. Do not let her see the bottle. Wrap it up in a towel or something and leave it outside the baby's room. Do take the sippee cup in with you. You need to start saying to your daughter 'You're a big girl now. Big girls use the big girl cup.' Tell her this all through the day when you give her the sippee cup to drink anything. As a mom of 5 you already know how amazing it is that kids will respond to the simplest of things. Remember that the whole concept of what you are doing with the milk whether it is delivered from your breast, a bottle or a sippee cup is to coat their tummies to a level where they feel full. Once that is achieved they will go on to sleep with little or no effort. Just cradle her in the same position you do a bottle and let her suck on the sippee cup. Give her lots of eye contact and encouragement and she'll gradually start to accept it and expect it every time.
As for advice on your hubby, I am experiencing something similar with my husband in trying to get our son potty trained.
He is our only child and he does not want to force him to use the potty if he is not ready. Well, he of course is showing all of the signs, pulling down his pants, saying 'Potty', etc.
But, when I encountered an issue such as this, I just offer to let him put the child down to bed. Here is the bottle/sippee cup. I have some clothes to fold and a few dirty bottles to organize, it's funny, but my husband's whole demeanor changes and he is suddenly very supportive of my position ;)

All my 3 kids were taking off the bottle on their 1 yr B-day. I started giving them milk in the zippy cups and they had no other choice. I threw all the bottles away and I had no choice myself, cause believe me, I wanted to give in. Just put the cup where she can reach and see it and tell her that their are no more bottles and she has to drink from the cup or Nothing!! Believe me, it works. They will cry and have a fit but just keep enforcing and telling her that she better drink from the cup because thats all she's having. Or you can also put Chile on the nipple and give it to her and she won't want it anymore. Then tell her again about the cup! My kids were off the bottle, pacifier, and pampers at 1y.o b-day!! Lend me your baby for 1 week and she will be off EVERYTHING!LOL.

Start using a sippy instead of bottle. Your child will resist at first (cry) but after a few days will give in. At least this is what my daughter did. Get your husband to help too so you don't have to bare all the stress.

Good luck.

Sharon - listen to what you are saying here - basically is it okay to give her what she is asking for and needs? Of course it is okay - she will be more trusting and secure of you and your husband! Stop comparissons and look at where your daughter is in her own development and needs. She can have a bottle or sippy cut until she is 3 yrs. old if she needs. Who really cares? Why take away something that is helping her? Do you see this perspective? That old "spoiling the child" parenting mode is O U T!!! It is out because it is not true. Help your child and she will build trust not a lack of, not resentment, not frustration, not stress. She will be the better for more love and care - not the worse. That old way of thinking is just so rediculous when you really consider all it is saying. I agree with your hubby. Not that she's the youngest but that she just still needs - in this area. Listen to that and just let her do what she needs to do.

Alli

My daughter was 2 before she weaned herself from the bottle. I did the same thing and gave her water for her naps and at night. One day I told her that when she thought she was a big girl and ready to give up having a bottle to just go ahead and throw the bottles away. Well, she obviously thought about it as the next day she came and told me she was a big girl and threw them all away and never looked back! I did the same thing with potty training. I let her control when she was ready. Not her age or pressure from other folks.

Good luck!
J.

No Sharon, it won't hurt her to stay on the bottle at all.
The only things you need to note are:
"Is her constant bottle feeding taking away her appetite for solid food?"
and:
If you need to potty train her, the first step is to take away the bottle so that she urinates less or your task will become impossible. You may only want to train her at two so she still has time to hold onto her bottle.
The time will present itself when she is ready to toss the bottle (literally) by suggesting she throws it into the bin. At this age, she will be unwilling to do so that's my guess.

I am 42 and can still remember giving up my bottle when I was a baby. It was a big deal for me being now a big girl and I was the oldest with two sisters right behind me who got to keep theirs.

It was a ceremonial "throw your bottle in the river" and I waved Bye Bye to it. It was a family event.

It is strange how I can remember that.

It is bad for their teeth in the long run. Orthodontic work is not cheap. Tell her that the new baby fairy is going to come and pick up all her bottles and pacifiers. Explain to her that there are new babies born everyday and that those babies need her bottles and pacifiers. Make it about her helping those other babies and give her a special bag to put them all in. Take her picture with the bag. Of course this is to be done over the course of a couple of weeks. Pick a date on the calendar and show it to her. Write on the date that the Fairy is making a pick up. Prepare her and everyday show her the calendar. Make sure Dad gets on your page. You could be more creative by writing her a little note and dust glitter around the spot. Maybe buy her something for a toddler, not a baby. Leave it with the note and glitter. It would make a great scrapbook page as well. This method worked for my friend's daughter. She never asked for them again.

I don't think it is going to scar her for life if she continues to take the bottle, but she is at an age where she theoretically should be off the bottle completely. I think the longer you wait, the harder it is going to be to break the habit, so it seems as though you are just making it harder for yourselves and her in the long run. It sounds like your husband may need to ask himself why he is so adamant about her keeping up the habit. Our job, as parents, is to help our kids become all that they can be and to encourage them to develop and grow on nature's time-table. To implement your own time-table on when your baby should or should not grow up almost seems kind of selfish, IMHO.

Hi Sharon,
You really dont need our advice your husband does ask him what the other kids are going to tease about .Just through out the bottles and replace them withh no leak sippy cups and if hubby gets upset make him an appointment with a counsler.you dont have a problem but the is going to if you let this contuinue,sorry hubby .Mom knows best .
L. TX