Walking to School and Back from School. - Bellevue,NE

I think that is about normal. I have a daughter in 2nd grade and she gets so mad at me for walking or driving her to school everyday. I am just so nervous. I would explain the thing about stranger danger and if it would make you feel better drop him at his friends to walk and pick him up at his friends. I would also consider getting him one of those kid cell phones that only call you and the police so if anything does happen he will be prepared. Good luck to you and let me know how it goes.

I've heard that even a girl with a black belt will be able to defend herself from any rapist unless the man has a gun. I'm definately going to get my kids in martial arts as soon as their old enough!

I agree with your concern. Unfortunately, far too many kids/teens have disappeared "just a few blocks from home." There are a number of unsolved child deaths in the Omaha area right now! We live in a very nice, upscale suburban area and can literally see my daughter's school from our back yard. Additionally, we have two County Sheriff's in our neighborhood. They are the ones who have convinced me NOT to let my daughter walk or ride her bike 2 blocks to her school. Our solution has been for me to ride/bike with her, then return home prior to heading to work. I've had to change my work schedule to do this, but nothing is more important than my child's safety and well being. Be certain to check familywatchdog.com and inform your children of any offenders living in your area. Drive them by the offender's home/work AND show them a photo so they know who to avoid. Also, you can order an excellent video on the website that teaches kids how to react/avoid potentially dangerous situations. Maintain your close watch and protect our children - there are plenty other safe opportunities for independance!

Your son, as well as any child who is 10 thru 18 feels that they are 'big enough' to do what Actual ADULTS do.

The reality is, that children are so 'smart' because they learn to MIMIC adults' walk and talk, and they pick up everything they see on television.

A person DOESN'T mature as a human being until they become RESPONSIBLE. That means doing the right thing, and the "smart" thing any time they are faced with a choice.

Some people NEVER mature mentally, even though they may mature physically in their early teens. (!)

If you don't trust this world to leave your child alone, then have him or her walk with a friend, or drop him or her at a friend's house and pick him or her up when it's time to go get them.

Parents have to get to know their children's friends' parents too.

And as a precaution... there are walkie-talkies that are affordable, and you only have to pay for them ONCE. Not like a cell phone.

Keep in contact with your child, and the more you get to know their habits, the better you will feel about them when they you are not with them.

My daughter is only 2yrs. old, so I may not be in the best position to give advice.

Are the blocks that he is alone, private residential streets in a safe neighborhood? If so, then I would suggest that he call you when they arrive at the friend's house, call again when he's leaving (if he stays there to hang-out for awhile before heading home) and call once he gets home.

If the streets are major streets or commercial streets or if they are in an unsafe or questionable neighborhood then I don't think I would personally let him do it. I would try to arrange with the friends parent to allow him to stay & have them do their homework together until you can pick him up.

Hi B.,

I'm sure that you have talked to your son about "stranger Danger". One thing is ...everybody is a stranger. One thing that you might want to do is set up a pass word. This way if somebody tries to use... the mother is in trouble and we need you to come with me or any other excuse. If that person does not have the family pass word then that would be reason enough to teach your child to run fast and contact the closest adult. I have 2 children myself. One is 8 and 12. I leave before my 8 year old gets on the bus. She is only home for 10-15 minutes alone and walks to the bus stop by herself. We live in an apartment complex and the bus stop is a park across the parking lot. You would think this would make me feel safe. But, we have alot of adult males that like to gather there after 3rd shift gets over. We have contacted the police and nothing gets done. They are not breaking the law. I have given my children "the pass word" and they know never to leave with anybody (I don't care if they know the person or not unless we have given them the pass word. Nobody but our family knows it. It's our little secret.
Good Luck!
H. B.

The first thing I would do is search for local predators in the website NeighborhoodWatchdog.com to see who in your neighborhood has been listed as a sexual offender and make your son aware of who these people are. I used to walk home alone from school but that was in the late 70s early 80s!! When it is my time to have my babygirl go to school she will absolutely not go alone no matter what she says.

If I were you I would suggest that he take some classes like Tae Kwon Do or Karate. Not only are they great for self esteem but he would learn so essential self defense and manipulation techniques that would help so he would be able to get away an run more successfully. I have to say my parents did it for me ang it was well worth the money.

B.~
Don't feel bad at all about not letting your son walk to/from school. I think it is our job as a parent to protect our children in everyway possible. My oldest is four and I don't know how I am going to leave her at school next year. Scares me to death! I think the best thing to do is pray that God will take care of our children and just to know that what ever happens-it is his plan. Good luck and God bless.~C.

My oldest son is 10 and I wouldn't let him walk for the same reasons. There is a difference between being overprotective and just being protective. You can never be too careful, especially these days. Maybe you should just explain to him that you feel more comfortable taking him to school until he's maybe 13. That would give you some time to slowly ween him onto more independent things.

My 9 yr old son walks to school sometimes too.
It was very hard at first, and still is sometimes, but we as parents have to give our children little bits of freedom in order to make them more responsible. My son is in karate and boy scouts, and both have given us many tools in teaching them not only self defense, but gives them a chance to talk about what to expect,and do in a tough situation. The more prepared they are, the more likely they are to feel confident. Also, in order to prepare myself for this, I had him take a walky talky with him for the first few times he walked to a friends house. It helped him and me feel a little safer.
Also, you could do some research on sex offenders that may live on the path he takes to school. That way, you are both educated on where they live, and what they look like.
I know this is such a scarey time we live in, but we have to raise our children to be smart. The more we "coddle" them, the less likely they are to deal well with bad situations. Just talk to your kids regularly about what they would do in certain situations, and you will be able to tell bases on their answers if they are aware enough to walk a lone.
Good luck, and i hope this helps a little.

B.,

Don't feel bad, my son is only 7mos old and I am ALREADY worried about this situation! I am often told not to worry about it YET...but I can't help but wonder if it's this "bad" now...what will it be like when HE's 10?? I feel your fear and would love to know how to not worry about this, too.

Sorry I don't have any glowing advice, I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone! :)

The best way to protect your kids is to teach them how to protect themselves, because you can't possibly be there all the time. Karate is good for kids for so many reasons, and this is one of them. There are classes at some schools specifically for this. They teach the kids how to fight off the attacker, run away, and get help. Here is a link to an article:
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2005/02/21/earlyshow/contr...

Here is a link to contact radKIDS, the non-profit that does the classes. http://www.radkids.org/locator/ne.html

Take your son to one, or get with the other moms and get one in your city :)

Goodluck!!
J.

Dont trust anyone B.. This world we live in has to many bad people that are waiting for your child. You will only have your children once, don't worry about taking and picking them up. One day your child will appreciate what you have done for him. Let him know that it is your job to make sure he gets to school safe. He'll understand. He has time with his friends. No worries...

you can also google sex offender registries and it will pull up a site that all you have to do is fill in your state and county and it will pull up the sex offenders in your area. This site is also a free site.

Hi there...First of all, give yourself a little more credit.....You raised him and he is going to be fine. You don''t want to instill your anxiety on him. Do some role play. There is a video by the Bernstein Bears it is"All about Strangers" and it had some neat scenerios in it, (wasn't all animated).I have a 16 year old and we rented videos like it when she was the same age. we practiced with the blow dryer (pretending it was the phone) calling 911 when she was younger. Go to blockbuster and ask what they have....It will help all of your lil ones! G. G.

I only have a 17 month-old, so I may be way off base, but here goes...Do you feel like you live in a safe area? (a small town in Idaho vs. downtown LA) They have those cell phones for kids that you can program for them to call certain numbers--those also have a panic button on them. Are you comfortable that your son knows what do if he is approached by a stranger? Maybe you could try driving him shorter and shorter distances every day...

Knowledge is power! Start with "The Safe Side" video from John Walsh and Julie Clark. Excellent video! Funny, not at all scary. Gives situations to empower kids. I loaned this video to my other friends with kids.. Needless to say they watch it over and over and I still havn't gotten it back!

You could also enroll him in a self defense class that teaches kids how to prevent an abduction.

For you there is a website: http://www.nvsexoffenders.gov/ which has the offenders in this area listed. Lists their home addresses and the blocks they work on! You can look them up by name (teacher, coach,etc.) or zip code. Even has pictures!

But remember, most kids are hurt by someone they already know. Teach your kids not to keep secrets from you and if anyone bothers them to let you know right away. Hope this helps!

M.

I understand and relate to your fears. My kids are 10 and 8, and they want to walk to school together. I tried to tell myself that they are smart kids and they would never put themselves in a situation that could get them in trouble, then I checked the sex-offender website and found out that there are so many right in my zipcode that I am convinced now they are NOT ready to walk themselves. We live in a very nice neighborhood, and I was shocked to see how many creeps there are living so close! I, for one, agree with the response that one person sent about waiting until they are 13 to let them walk themselves. Although I do not consider myself an overprotective mom,I think that the world is much different from the days when we were allowed to roam the neighborhoods unsupervised until dark every night. Oh, how I miss those days!

I wonder if you could have a "walking group" with other moms and kids in your neighborhood and take turns walking a big group of kids to school together. That way there's an adult present, and there's safety in numbers, but maybe you son wouldn't feel like you're smothering him.
BTW, I don't know many 10 year olds, but I definitely wouldn't let one watch my kids, so I have a hard time seeing them as responsible enough to know what to do in a crisis situation. Maybe in a year or two?

Your son is right. Im sure he runs further in football. Just remember to give him the reminder about strangers and let him go. If your so worried about him then follow him home but stay a couple of blocks back that way you can watch him without him knowing. He is just wanting his indepenence. I hope this has helped. Hang in there.