Unsure as to Whether 3 1/2 Year Old Should Have Tonsils and Adenoids Removed

Updated on April 18, 2007
H.M. asks from Aylett, VA
20 answers

My 3 1/2 year old daughter has had sleep issues since she was around 18 months old. She snores, breathes through her mouth a lot during the night, tosses and turns, and wakes up frequently whining and will not put herself back to sleep (note: she'll get up for water or to potty and put herself back to sleep fine, it's only the other times when she doesn't need anything that she cries for us). After lots of suggestions from the pediatrician and other Moms as to what the problem might be (nightmares, too hot or too cold, inability to soothe herself back to sleep) she was referred to an ENT for possible sleep apnea. We went to the appointment today and after a brief discussion and even briefer exam (he looked in her mouth, ears, and nose), the ENT suggested that she have her tonsils and adenoids removed. He said that her tonsils were not enlarged and looked fine, but because she breathes normally through her nose during the day and not through her mouth, it was unlikely that removing the adenoids alone would be helpful. He did no x-rays or anything, and it seemed like such a big decision to be made so quickly, but since I'm not a doctor and he's a specialist, I don't know if I should question his diagnosis.

My main questions are, have any of you had your child's tonsils and adenoids removed around that age and for that reason? How scary and complicated was it (I'm worried about anesthesia and pain following the surgery)? How did your child recover? And, did it cure the sleep issues?

Thank you for your help!

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So What Happened?

Thank you SO MUCH to all of you who wrote me. I did choose to have a second opinion on my daughter, and the doctor agreed that she did, in fact, need to have her tonsils and adenoids removed for sleep apnea and snoring. The surgery is scheduled for April 20th, and although I am terrified of her having the procedure, I feel at peace with the decision. My husband also read your responses and benefited from them as well. We both truly appreciate the help!

More Answers

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P.

answers from Spartanburg on

I was just talking about this today - not about my baby, but about me. I had my t & a out at 6, 25 years ago when technology was not as good, and I remember it being a little scary before they put me under, but I got to eat ice cream afterwards. I remember waking up from the surgery with blood coming out of my mouth, but I don't think that happens anymore. No real pain, that I remember, though.
As a child I snored, moved around in bed and got a lot of colds. My mom said it was night and day. She'd have to come check on me because she couldn't hear me snore anymore. I was much perkier since I slept better.
The surgery is a piece of cake now, and I know it's a bit frightening to do stuff like that to your kids, but it may be the best thing in the long run.
I would probably get another ENT, though. Dr's are very busy, but he should have enough time or care to do a more thorough exam.

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F.B.

answers from Charlottesville on

I can't tell you whether you need this surgery or not, if you at all feel uncomfortable with the Dr.'s advice, get a second opinion. With that being said, my son had his adenoids out at 17 months and they actually didn't know if they were enlarged until they got in there. He had symptoms suggesting that. They can't really x-ray or doing anything like that to tell. I was scared, but trusted my ENT. He had a minor complication with his breathing and had to be intabated. He woke up extremely upset, they gave him so morphine, he fell asleep woke up a couple of hours later in my arms and was playing at home by that night. This was his 2nd operation, the first one he didn't have any complications when they went in his ears and he woke up fine and I took him home 30' after he woke up with no problems following at all. This complications was mostly caused, we think by his asthma. If you and your dr. think this surgery will help, then I honestly can tell you I don't think there is any reason not to. But be sure you trust the ENT, find another one your comfortable with, this is your child!! Hope this helps.

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B.P.

answers from Charlotte on

Dear H.,

If you're not comfortable, don't do it. Get a second opinion or look for some other causes of the problem.

Having surgery seems to me like a drastic step to take for a child that isn't sleeping well. The way you described your office visit would have me questioning the validity of the doctor's diagnosis as well. Just because he's a "specialist" doesn't mean you shouldn't question him. He may have the title, but that doesn't necessarily make him good at what he does. It just doesn't sound like he did a very thorough examination, and I would definitely get a second opinion before putting my child through surgery. Although all the responses you received indicate that the children did fairly well with the surgery, it's still surgery and there are significant risks with such a thing. Also, the tonsils and adenoids are lymphoid tissues, which is the bodies primary site of immunological activity against disease. If you take them out, that first response to disease becomes the job of the lymph nodes in the neck, but that's not supposed to be their job so they can become really compromised and lead to other problems for a person.

My daughter, who is 3 1/2, has similar issues to what you described. She has never been able to breathe out of her nose, especially at night. She snores. She wakes up in the night and can't put herself back to sleep without coming to my room (but she has no problem if she gets up to potty). She also was having recurring ear infections. I took her to an allergist and found out she is highly allergic to dust mites and cats (we have 2). I have put dust mite covers on all the bedding, am obsessive with cleaning her room, clean the cats, have a spray to neutralize the dander in the house, and she takes an allergy med once a day. I have also severly limited her dairy intake because dairy can increase the mucous production, and her body was having a hard time dealing with all the mucous and getting it to drain properly. Since taking the steps to deal with the allergy, she's doing so much better, even though we still have the cats. I would look into some other causes of the problem before deciding on surgery.

It's a hard decision. Good luck with it.

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S.G.

answers from Savannah on

Oh, What a scary decision to have to make!!! I haven't had to personally but a friend of mine had a similiar problem with their son. He was about 2 1/2 and had his adnoieds removed due to sleep apena. I think they did his tonsils too but I'm not positive. He recovered quickly and was running around like a normal kid within a few days. Has your daughter had a lot of strep throat or anything like that so far? If she has then that could be the reason why he wants to do the tonsils too. When I was in middle school one winter every other week I kept coming down with strep and a few times of tonsilits. My Dr said that it takes a toll on the tonsils being inflamed like that and he suggested I have mine removed but I never did. Never really had a problem either after that.

Just make sure the next time you have an appointment with the ENT, you express your concerns about anything and make sure he fully explains stuff to you that you understand the what and whys about it. It's scary enough when we as adults have to go through surgery but when it is our little one, well, that's a whole different scary!!

HUGS to both of you and keep us posted!!

S.

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J.L.

answers from Charlotte on

good luck on the surgery , another advise make sure you bring a pullup or change of panties for her. after she wakes up she will not be able to control herself. my daughter just turn 3yrs old when her's was removed it was only 10 min and the surgery was over. it is just the recovery time that was hard. make sure you have another adult to drive you back home you will need to sit with her in the car. I will pray for her and let me know how it went for you and her.

J.

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J.Q.

answers from Roanoke on

Hi H.!
Like you, I too was very hesitant about having my son's tonsils and adenoids removed. I put it off for about a year and a half hoping that my son who was 4 at the time would "grow out of it". He wasn't the average child who kept ear infections and a sore throat but his tonsils at times were so large that they were blocking his airway...which made him snore, etc. In hindsight...it was the best decision. He was small and somehwat malnourished, due to being unable to swallow. I didn't realize this at the time. I am so thankful now that I had them removed. They are truly for some children a significant source of infection and in most children are malfunctioning. The rationalization for removing both at the same time is so that if removing the adenoids or tonsils, whichever, doesn't work...they won't have to go back again to have the other removed. Since the surgery, he sleeps better, eats better, is growing and is happier. Good Luck!

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C.F.

answers from Norfolk on

Hello H.,

My daughter is about to be 4 yrs. old and her adenoids were removed and tubes placed in her ears when she was two years old. It was the best thing we could have done. All the sleep problems, breathing, snoring, etc. you tslked about we experienced and more. Her tonsils were not remove, but she did fine with the surgery and there were no complications. In and out the same day. Hope this helps.

C.

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L.B.

answers from Atlanta on

H.,

My daughter was four when she had her tonsils and adenoids removed. They removed her's because of the sleep issues also. I soooo recommend it. She did fine with the surgery and was very happy to eat popsicles and jello for a few days (just nothing red!). They gave her pain meds, but she only took it for the first day and maybe once the second day. Children are sooo resilient. Taking out the adenoids also help with her allergies, which she no longer has. She has slept fine ever since.

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A.D.

answers from Charlotte on

My son had his adenoids removed this past December, it was great. He will be 4 on April 11, and did wonderful. I wondered the same thing when we went to the ENT, he glanced and said the adenoid had to go. That's all I said??? It was an out patient thing, he did cry a little when I first went back but he stopped after 10 minutes. They let us go as soon as he took some juice, which showed he could swallow. He came home and slept for about three hrs then hopped out of bed and said "I am hungry", he has been unstopable since!! They do say there could be a little bleeding, which he didn't have. My husband and I have noticed a great change in our child since the surgery, the ENT Dr said his adenoid was one big mass. Something his ENT Dr pointed out was he only does surgery during the week, not after Wednesdays for the fact he doesn't want the weekend to interfere with any arising problems, end result the parent having to contact the on call Dr and then waiting or having to go to the ER. I would have never thought of that, it's a good point, the Drs office will be open if a need should arise! Good Luck!

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J.C.

answers from Asheville on

H.,
Where are you located? My daughter who is now 6 yrs old, had her tonsils and adnoids removed for the same reasons when she was 4 years old. She adjusted well and was out of commission for about 4 days...kids bounce back well! She too had sleep apnea and would stop breathing for seconds at a time. Scary thought. We used Dr. Wallenborn at WNC Ear, nose and throat in Asheville, NC. He is wonderful with children and has also placed tubes in her ears and for her sister.
Since her surgery, it is like night and day! She has more restful sleep periods and has not had any other problems since.
J. :)

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S.L.

answers from Spartanburg on

My little girl is having her tonsils and adenoids removed next week along with having tubes put in her ears. She just turned three last month. She snores and breathes through her mouth every night. Her tonsils stay swollen due to many allergies. The dr. suggested surgery after about 2 min. after hearing her symptoms. Like you, I was very surprised that he wanted to do it so quickly. He wanted me to walk out and set up an appointment right then! I put it off for a year, but her hearing is suffering. I'm very scared. I don't want to put my little girl through that, but I believe it is the best thing for her. I just hope that I can keep it together while she's around the morning of her surgery.

X-rays won't tell you anything. Just telling the Dr. that she snores will cause him to want to take the adenoids out. With him being so young, the problems will only get worse as he gets older. It sounds like she already has sleep apnea. This can lead to large list of problems later down the line. If it will make you feel better, get a second opinion from another dr. in another practice. My opinion: I believe you will hear the same thing.

Good luck and let us know how things go.

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S.R.

answers from Charlottesville on

Hello, I went through this with both of my boys and they were 6 1/2 and the other was 2 1/2. It was the best thing I could have ever done. And mind you they did both at the same time. Right after surgery my 6 year old throw up a few times but the baby was very good he just sit in my lap and rocked in the chair. They had lots of ice cream and tv for a few days and back to normal. The reason they wanted to do the surgery was because they both snored really bad. It is scarey I won't lie when they take your babies away from you and you know they are putting them to sleep, but they are not gone very long at all and it well be much better in the long run.

Good luck and I pray all goes well.

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R.C.

answers from Raleigh on

My son had his adenoids removed at the age of 2 1/2. The doctor said his tonsils were large, but that they couldn't remove them until he was 4, which he is now. The surgery went great and he had no pain afterwards. Actually he was his normal self about three hours after we got home, BUT I do have to warn you. Of course, not all kids will react the same, but my son had a terrible time coming out of the anesthesia, which they told us that was a possiblity. He was so angry that he didn't even want me to hold him. He even pulled out his IV he was so out of it. It literally broke my heart, but that is the only thing that went wrong so I wouldn't worry too much. Good luck! Everything will be fine. P.S. My son still breaths from his mouth and still snores so I don't know how much good it did. Maybe once the tonsils come out things will get better.

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C.A.

answers from Columbia on

Hi H. -

My son was about four when he had his tonsils and adenoids removed and I wish we had done it sooner (He's 5 1/2 now). His tonsils were so large he had a difficult time swallowing. As a matter of fact he developed a really bad gag reflex so that even now he will throw up very easily. He also turned into a very picky eater since there wasn't much he could eat so again, even now, I'm struggling with that. His face was white and looked drawn. He would also snore and have fitful sleep. What a difference there was as soon as his tonsils and adenoids were out!

My daughter started having trouble too, but she is two. We just went ahead and had her adenoids removed in January and she is doing much better (she was having a second set of ear tubes put in at the same time). If I could have had her tonsils out at the same time I would have, but our ENT said they don't like doing tonsils on kids under three unless absolutely necessary.

My son recovered very quickly and didn't have much pain (the pain medicine took care of that for a day, and after that it wasn't needed). He did very well with the anesthesia.

My daughter, on the other hand, did not do well with the anesthesia. She was very combative after coming out. When I got back to post-op she was crying and when I went to sit and rock her she didn't want to have anything to do with that. She even pulled out her IV. However, once we got into the van and got home she was like a totally different person - back to her normal self. She, too, only seemed to need the pain medicine for a day.

I'm glad we had this done for the both of them (although in my son's case I wish it would have been sooner) and would do it again in a heartbeat.

Take care.

C.

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T.T.

answers from Norfolk on

My son had his adenoids and tubes done when he was about 17 months. He could never breath through his nose, it was like he had a cold 24/7. We had the surgery (trust the doctor, they know what they're doing), and I was so happy we did, it was hardest on us then the baby! And he was up and playing that evening after surgery. Good luck with it, if you're not sure, get a second opinion. But trust me on this, sleep apnea is something you don't want to mess with, I had a close friend pass away with that, it was horrible, because if had the surgery done, he would still be with us, and he was 37! Please, for your daughters sake, do it!
God Bless!

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J.J.

answers from Norfolk on

I would get a second opinion. If the tonsils are not enlarged then why would that be causing the sleep issues? Sleep apnea is when they actually stop breathing for a few seconds, have you watched her sleep to see if she does this? My son had his adnoids and tonsils removed when he was 4 but it was because he was chronically sick all the time with strep, once they were out he never had strep again and he is 17 now! The worst part was the pain, he neck was very swollen and you could tell it hurt alot, they come out of the anestheia kind of confused and crying, but the usually let you hold them right away and it wears off quickly.. and ohh.. bad, bad breath for a few days after! LOL... Good luck in what ever you decide!

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J.C.

answers from Greenville on

This is a huge decision for you to make. I would suggest getting a second opinion. I will tell you as a radiographer (not radiologist) that tonsils do not show up on xrays so that would not have given the Dr. any more information. I would though suggest getting a second opinion since you don't feel like he really did a whole lot of investigation into your child's problem.

Some doctors will do more than others to confirm a diagnosis and tonsils are taken out all the time, so I am sure it tends to be a catch all diagnosis. For a 3 1/2 year old child I would definately get a second opinion before I commit to any form or surgery.

If she had chronic infections I would be more likely to remove them without seeing another Dr. but since your Dr. hasn't really given any proof that they are the cause. The way you say it, it sounds like it was, a well, Im not sure why she wakes up but lets remove her tonsila and adenoids just in case. In that case I would wait for a second opinion. Surgery is a big decision no matter what kind it is and should never be taken lightly.

I wish you good luck and your daugheter a good nights sleep!

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D.S.

answers from Columbia on

Hi H.,

My son was 2 years old when we had his tonils and adenoids removed. He had severe ear infections to the point of seizures caused from very high fevers. After that scare, the choice was easy for us. The surgery went fine, and he went home the same day. The only thing that was a little scary was after the surgery, I was not there immediately and he was scaried. But as soon as they took me to him, I took him out of the bed and held him in the reclining chair and he slept until he was released. He was fine a few days later. It was the best thing we ever did. He is now 14 and may have been sick 3 times since the surgery and that is counting the flu and food poisoning.

Good Luck.

D. S.

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S.N.

answers from Wilmington on

If I were you, I'd get a second opinion...just in case
S.

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A.C.

answers from Charlotte on

Hi H.!
The very best advice that I could give you if you are unsure of the diagnosing dr. recommendation, would be to get a second opinion! I myself have had my tonsils and adenoids removed and it did a world of wonders! Good luck! I hope all goes well!

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