My son is a great sleeper when we are at home. Goes down each night without a problem, unless he is sick. But when we travel to visit our parents, he refuses to sleep in his pack n play at whichever house we are staying at. He will cry and cry and cry - we try to let him work it out on his own, but he just keeps crying. When we go into try to soothe him, he acts as if he is scared to death and practically jumps out of the pack n play to get to us. We have had to resort to one of us going to bed the same time he does and letting him fall asleep in the bed with us, then transferring him to his own bed once he's asleep, or letting him fall asleep in our laps in the living room. After that he's good - even if he wakes up in the night, he'll go back to sleep on his own. Does anyone have any suggestions? It makes it very hard for us to visit with anyone because one is always on "sleep duty".
Well... My husband got to test out the ideas this past weekend! Thank you everyone for all your great ideas and suggestions. They (my husband and his parents)ended up moving the pack n play up into the office just off the living room. He could still see everyone and hear them, so he went down alot easier. We are going to try the same thing the next time we visit my parents. Hopefully it works! Thanks again to everyone!
We either rent a crib or borrow one from a local civic association when we stay at my parents house. My son hates the pack & play, too. I can't say I blame him. .
Hi S.,
Does he get a chance to play in the pack-n-play in the room where he is being expected to sleep? Or, does he see the room and pack-n-play for the first time when you put him to bed? Maybe you could have him "help" you get the room set-up when you first arrive, then while you do a "few" things in the room, you could let him play with some toys while he is in the pack-n-play. Then after he's in it for five or more minutes. Tell him you'll be right back and go get something, like his water or milk or a blanket. Make sure not to be gone for more than a minute. Then when the room is done, you get him and take him into the living part of the house where everyone is. You want to get him to understand that even though you're not in the room, you're still there.
Additionally, if the only time he uses the pack-n-play is at the "Grandparents," he probably isn't familiar with it. I would bring it out occassionaly at home and make it a "treat" to be able to get inside and play in it. Such as setting it out and putting some of his favorite toys in it. Then you wait until he asks to get inside and play WHILE remaining in the room. Then after he's in it for five minutes or so, you exit the room for a few minutes. Then come right back. Get him to understand that you are still there, he just can't see you.
Hope this helps and works.
I don't really have any advice for you, but I so know what you're going thru. I hated traveling with my son because he would not sleep anywhere. At naptime and bedtime I would have to lay with him until he fell asleep. Sometimes that took a really long time! He will get over it, but he's just one of those kids that has a hard time adjusting to new places. I would say don't let him lay and cry. That will make it worse. When he acts likes he's terrified, he probably is. He's in a strange place and you've left the room. He's worried you left him there. So I would continue to lay with him until he falls asleep, just alternate who lays with him, and he'll grow out of it. Probably within a few months. Once they hit 3, a lot of things like that start to go away and they act much more grown up. You will be surprised in how much he changes in the next 6 months.
Could you put the Play n Pack somewhere in the room where he can see you or your husband-then when your child falls asleep,move him into his own room? Also, how long do you let him cry when alone in room? If not long enough he might know he just has to cry for so long until someone comes to the rescue. Lastly, it is possible that he really feels insecure and afraid to be alone in room when not at home in VERY familiar territory...some toddlers are more sensitive than others. You will most likely need to test the waters in these different areas,then go with your gut feeling on how to handle it.
It sounds like your being a great parent. Your son has a real need for that reassurance in different places, and you are meeting that need. Remember it doesn't last forever.
We found that it's helpful if take our kids to the room they are going to sleep in and have them stay there with us while we set up the pack-n-play/sleeping bag. Then tell them that this is their room, this is where they are going to sleep, etc, and it gives them a chance to see it during the day and kind of get familiar with the surroundings so they won't be as scared as if we just took them in the room at bedtime.
Everyone of our 5 did the same thing. We never found anything that worked so we just continued to do exactly what your doing. Let me know if you find something that works! I'll have Grandchildren in the near future!
Does he have a special toy or blanket he sleeps with at home? If so, bring it along (you probably already do that). Also, if he has music that he listens to at bedtime, or special books that you read to him, bring those too. I would try to recreate your home environment as much as possible. I bet that it isn't the pack'n'play that he hates, just the change in environnment. A change in routine is difficult for a toddler!
We traveled a lot with our first one. We did the extra padding. I actually found just a waterproof sheet did the same trick without being a suffocation hazard. Also, I left the pack n play set up at home and occasionally let him take a nap in it. I put it in different rooms so he was used to the view being different. Also, although he didn't use one at home, a nightlight worked wonders. There was a stage, I don't remember what age, where he still screamed almost the entire first night. After that, he was just fine. He learned to love the Pack n Play. It was harder for the baby to use that then to use the crib.
I like the suggestions that Angie L. gave you. All those things worked for me with my two girls. In addition, the thing that worked the most for us was bringing a little music box with us that we always put them down with at home. The music brought familiarity to the new place. It worked every time, even when we were in a totally new place (which was often), and even camping! I love the pack and play. Sometimes I'd drape blankets around the outside so they couldn't see out and become distracted. Keep trying...you persistance will pay off and you'll be happy your kids can travel well.
We have had a couple kids in the family (nieces) do this. One thing they found is that the cushion is harder then the crib. Put a blanket under the sheet when you make it.
Also, make sure there is a night light in the room. Even if he doesn't normally have one at home, it will be a comfort to him not to be in the dark in a strange place.
Also, when you leave home, tell him know when you pack the pack and play "ok its time to pack your bed, lets get it!" Then get it out, let him help put his blankie with it, put is stuffed animal with it, whatever he wants to take from his crib. (which isn't much so won't add much to pack right?") He may feel better if he is part of making it his own, it will be more familiar. My son has always gotten to take "blankie and snuggle bear" when we sleep anywhere that isn't home. Then when you get where you are goin let him "help you" set it up. Put it up, then let him put the blankie in, put the stuffed animal in it.
It sort of sounds like you put him in his own room. We usually (by necessity) have the pack'nplay in the same room with us, put our baby down at his usual bedtime, then sneak in when we're ready for bed. We take him with us to get settled into the room earlier in the day, letting him explore and get comfortable in there.
And when we lived with my inlaws for a month while we closed on our first house, our almost 1-year old would go to sleep at his regular bedtime in a pack n play, but always woke up at midnight, even though he was in the same room with us. I just put him in bed with us for the rest of the night. Even after a whole month of this "bad habit," it only took one night in our new house to get him used to sleeping alone again. Would you all be able to sleep together a few nights?
S.,
It may just be that your son is uncomfortable where he is going to sleep because it is not his usual rutine. My son had a hard time sleep at other peoples houses, but we found that when we put the pack and play in the bedroom we were staying in, and did all the usual bedtime rituals when we were away from home, he would still go to bed just fine. We stay at my parents house a lot and decided to help him maintain his routine, we could keep things for him there. for example, he has a favorite stuffed animal and blanket at their house, his own toothbrush, a special bed (a squishy mattress on the floor next to our bed), and a night light. Maybe try doing a routine with him and let him fall asleep on the bed byhimself rather then the pack and play!
Hope this helps
J.
This sounds so familiar! Going to see family took on a whole new meaning of not sleeping. Our pack 'n play worked pretty well until we had to take the bassinet top part off b/c our little guy was getting too big and mobile. Bending over into it is a whole other story -- they are not ergonomic for parents who are up all night! So luckily this year, my parents purchased a real crib for their house and it's made a world of difference. I don't know if that's a possibility for you but I'd recommend it. Soft music may help too? A favorite toy? We did put another blanket under the mattress pad and sheet to make it softer and more inviting. That seemed to help somewhat. Good luck to you.
Hello S., I recommend the book, "The No Cry Sleep Solution," by Elizabeth Pantley. She has a book for babies and one for toddlers and they are both in the Jefferson County library system. These books give lots and lots of ideas and is respectful of different parental styles.
Personally, since the day they were born, our children have always wanted my husband or me to attend to them when they need us at bedtime or during the night. We know they will be teenagers in the not so distant future, so we welcome the nurturing we get to give now.
Trust yourself and your child. You will find your way. ~T.
bring a comfort item from home for him that he sleeps with every night. Also, have him get comfortable with his pack and play... maybe have him sleep in it for a few night before going. Make sure to introduce him well to the room you'll (he'll) sleep in (open all the closets to check for monster etc). Good luck... i know traveling with kids is so hard!
My son did this at 10 mos when we went on vacation. Make sure he has all that he loves from home (within reason). A favorite stuffed animal, blankie, music box and try to mimic home as much as possible. I have to say a few times I laid down on the bed with my son while on vacation and got him to fall asleep and then put him in the pack and play. The pack and play is really kind of intimidating as it isn't like a crib and not really too comfy. I put a blankie on the bottom that was squishy to add comfort and made sure he had his music box from home and that helped a bunch. There is always an adjustment with travelling as kids love routine and structure and when it isn't the same as home it can be scary. Just keep the same bedtimes, nightly rituals and keep reassuring him.
