Toys - Chicago, IL

I would ask that you donate them to a womens/childrens shelter...they are in desperate need in these times. If you need the names of good ones, please let me know!

A lot of the moms have great ideas and here's my variation. Get a box and find a place out of the way where you can 'hide' it. Fill it with about half the toys, select the ones he won't miss right away (do this while he's napping or otherwise distracted). Put them in the box and hid them for a week or two. Then you can slowly reintroduce a couple of those while taking out some of those left out. It's a good way to recycle them with him and he'll find new appreciation for them. Especially with the economy the way it is you may not be able to afford just giving toys away and possibly buying new ones this was a great trick that we used up til my kids were ten or so.

I am glad you have a resolution but, I have to agree with other posters. Never get rid of a childs things without giving them closure. It does deeply hurt when something- even if it seems insignificant to you - is suddenly missing. I have seen my children wonder through the house and couldnt tell me why. Now, I didnt get rid of their item, they just didn't tell me they were looking for it when i put it up. When I would get it for them, they would take breaths of relief. Children need respect and security like we do.

It could be that your son is just as overwhelmed by the mess as you are.

First you should do a sort, TRASH, KEEP, Donate or Sell. You and your son should do this together or if he wants to keep it all, then you need to do it without him.

Afterwards, get some bins and label them with words or pictures of what toys should go in the bins. Set some rules. #1 Put away the toy you are playing with before you get another one. Example: No getting out the cars while the legos are all over the floor. #2 Set aside some time before bed to pick up. That way, he'll wake to a clean room and you won't be stepping on toys and hurting yourself.

Good luck and let us know what happens.

I know you've gotten a lot of reponses so I may be late on this, but I was tired of picking up everything, too and having a mess all the time. I have a four year old son who likes to just dump things and play. I have gotten a lot of toys from garage sales and he has a lot he has gotten from multiple sets of grandparents for holidays. He had a lot and didn't even play with a lot of the things. I separated most of his toys into about 8 or so different colored Rubbermaid storage containers. I keep them in the basement and I get a new one out each day. Ex: he has a lot of puzzles so I put one or two in each bin with other toys and this way he sees them only every so often and is more excited to play with them. He is now old enough to pick up himself so every night he picks up the toys and puts them in the container and when he goes to bed I put it back downstairs and get a new one. Then he has a new batch of toys to play with the next day. He actually plays with them because he hasn't seen them for awhile and isn't overwhelmed with too much in the room. It has worked very well for us. Of course, there are still the bigger toys that we leave out, and he can always play with those, but he has done really well with this way. Best of luck!

The trick is to go through his toys when he is not home. Weed through and take out the things that he no longer plays with and put them in a box. You can contact the purple hearts or the vietnam vets. They usually do a monthly pick up of things you want to get rid of and all you have to do is leave the box outside your door. Unless you have another child to save toys for, if you put them in the garage they will be forgotten and take up space. You will eventually end up getting rid of them anyway.

Dear T.,

I feel your pain. I run a daycare so it is really hard for me to get rid of the toys. We will do our annual spring cleaning next month. I send the kids to grandmas and then I go through and get rid of the broken toys. I will then pack at least one box of toys that I know the kids don't play with. I also get rid of some of my things like a shirt that I never wear or a kitchen applicance that I never use. Then I have my kids go and pick out 3 toys to get rid of and if they do this I take them out for ice cream as a reward, then we go to the local catholic charities and donate the stuff for little kids who don't have any toys and the moms that don't have mom things. I know that a lot of churches use this stuff also I would talk to your local shelters, like homeless and housing places. We even donated some old books to the dr.s. I think red cross takes donatations for fire victims. I think because my kids see that I give some of my stuff away to that they feel it is ok, that I am not just taking their stuff away. good luck
B.

I'm having DeJa-VU! I just went through this with my daughter. She has toys in her room, the living room, splling into the spare bedroom! Completely out of control. Here's what I did...I took every single toy, puzzle, barbie clothes everything and put it in the living room. I first sorted...TRASH, SELL/DONATE and KEEP! Then I took the sell/donate to good will and trashed the trash. (She wasn't home of course when I did this!) Then I sorted the keep into catagories. Went and bought cheap containers that have the lids that stay attached (they like fold out and hand at the sides) small ones and organized it all and they stack on one set of shelves that are in her room and then I bought one of those $40 kids toy bin things that we put in her closet. All books go in the top and any other misc went in the remaining bins. No more toys in the living room, no more toys in the spare bedroom and her room is organized. Then we made a rule that she only gets one bin out at a time. Before she is allowed to get out soemthing new she has to put away the first bin and put it in its place. She hasn't missed any of the stuff I got rid of...just shows they really don't know what they even have! IT's great! and of course now I am very careful about buying new stuff.

I agree wit the soring ideas from other moms. If you can get your son involved with it, it would be great to show him you can give your toys to other kids who don't have toys, but if you can't then like they said do it when he is not home. After you have done the initial sorting and cleaning up, if his room is a mess have HIM help you clean the room. Giving him a task at a time until it is clean. It may take a while at first, but it can be done. I have a 2 and 3 year old and we got into the habit of cleaning their room each night before bed. We would go in and I'd have one child put the "foam blocks" in one container, the other one put the legos in the container they go in, etc.. The impotant thing is to have him help you do it. He is at an age where once clutter is gone he should be able to clean it on his own. As far as saving some toys, that is up to you and how much space you have. We live in a small 2 bedroom apartment with not much storage space, so I don't have the space to store alot of toys. I have a couple stored that they will grow into, or to pull out every now and then, but not many. If it is simply something they don't play with I give it away.

Go to www.flylady.com and find the link for the house fairy. It is a good site to motivate kids. I don't use the program regularly, and haven't brought a thing. but we have played the housefairy. There is a video that you can watch free, that has the house fairy (santaclauses sister) talking to the kids. My kids don't believe in it, but we play somtimes, and if their room is clean they may occasionally find a piece of candy with a note from the house fairy.

Also make sure that there is a specific place for things so he knows where everything goes. Otherwise it can be very overwhelming for a kid.

Hi,
You may want to sign up for a yahoo group called Freecycle.
www.freecylcle.org I believe is the link to get started.
People give away (and ask for) stuff on that message board that others do not need anymore. The idea behind it is to share things that otherwise would end up in the landfill.
You may also try to sell your used toys at OnceUponAChild.

Just get rid of some of the toys. Obviously they aren't all needed. Leave the ones that your child really likes and donate the rest to some homeless kids.

If your son asks where a certain toy is just say you're not really sure. It won't be a lie!

Get a good, organized system so that he can put things away himself, and so it's obvious where they go. IKEA has some great options. I think the line we use is TROFAST. There are different options for shelves and sizes of bins. Make a list of toys you need to store, and figure out how much room you'd need for them, then go to IKEA with your son, and let him be involved in the process by allowing him to chose the colors of the bins or something like that.
Good luck!

You can go online to www.housefairy.org The idea is that a "fairy" comes to visit your sons room while he is gone or sleeping and leaves a treat if his room is clean. It is ingenious. check it out, then he will willingly get rid of some of his toys and he will help with the clean up of existing toys.

Everyone - Please DO NOT take away toys without your kids' input and participation. Not only is it important for them to learn how to sort and get rid of stuff so that they know how to do it when older, but I still resent that occasionally my dad would go on a cleaning spree and get rid of our toys and stuffed animals. I'm in my forties and I still remember how bad it felt when something I loved was thrown away or given away. I have involved my kids in sorting and donating their belongings since they were little (they're now 9 and 12) and they don't react negatively at all when it's time to get rid of stuff. They can mostly do it on their own now.

Every birthday and Christmas we sit down with our daughter and separate her toys into two piles...her favorites and the ones she doesn't play with that often. Out of the less played with toys we have her choose the same amount to give away that she received for Christmas or birthday. We have been doing this since she was born (obviously, we were doing the sorting back then). It keeps her toy limit down and it teaches her that giving is just as nice as receiving...especially when we take her to the donation center with us. She has learned about children who don't have toys and how wonderful they feel by receiving hers.

My 7-year old stepdaughter has responded well to the House Fairy!

http://www.housefairy.org/

You don't have to sign up for the service to get the House Fairy to come, but since it was such a neat idea I wanted to support her.

The House Fairy comes once a week unannounced. If the room is clean she leaves a surprise. If it's messy she leaves fairy dust.

My stepdaughter cleaned her room right away and has kept it clean since! We barely have to remind her (although sometimes she asks for help and we need to help her) and I shop the dollar bins at Target for the surprises. The House Fairy leaves stickers, pencils, hair bands etc. She LOVES it!

We went through her massive amount of toys and she just needed help getting rid of them (for the House Fairy). She left them in a big bag by the door and the House Fairy took them away and left her a surprise. The House Fairy will take the toys to children who don't have toys (I dropped them off at Goodwill).

I also am signed up for The Flylady (www.flylady.net) and she helps me with my routines and decluttering.

I think your little boy will love the House Fairy! He's just the right age. He may need help initially getting his room decluttered but something about the magic of a fairy just gets the kids motivated! I don't understand it, and I'm not going to argue with it!

First, if you want to give things away, take them out when your son isn't around. Hide them and if he doesn't ask for them in a week, give them away accept if it is a toy or game that can be used at a later time or age. Wait a few months at least and reintroduce it and it will seem new again.

As for storage, if you can get some kind of bin system or boxes with lids. Take a picture of the toys that go into each box. He is old enough to help you sort his toys and you should make sure to have him clean things up each time he is done. If he is free-playing in his room. Tell him at a certain time you will come in and you will help him clean up.

Good Luck

I bought my daughter two big toy chests. I told her ALL toys must fit in these chests. If they don't fit, they have to go. So she sorted them out and kept what could fit in the chests. Then I showed her a big green garbage bag and told her that when she goes to bed whatever is not in the chests goes in the bag and gets donated. Also, when she got new toys, they had to fit in the chests so she had to make room. Worked pretty well.

Hi T.,
We live in a small house with 3 kids so I can understand the messy room look. What I finally did was take care of the problem myself when the kids were at Grandma's house. I went through all the toys and sorted everything. Broken and missing peices got thrown out,the catch all toy box got donated and everything got divided into bins with lids that could stack either under the bed or in the bottom of the closet. I now do this every six months.
Good Luck!

I have this problem with my kids. It seems the room is never clean. I have bought bins for everything and they broke them or "repurposed" them. We are currently sorting as others have suggested. But one thing I have done in the past and will be doing again is stashing some away. You get a bin to divide the toys. half the toys get put away and the other half he keeps. Then every 3 months or 6 months, you go through them again. Then switch the toys you just sorted and replace with those that were in storage. This way you can see what he is no longer interested in and the toys replaced are like new to him. This also makes it a little easier to get rid of toys that he has outgrown. For my kids, favorites always stay-like my son's Legos and Knex, and my daughters' favorite stuffed animals.

First, make him pick them up. Each day before bedtime, stand there and direct him as to what toy to pick up until he picks them all up. If he can walk, he can pick up toys. At six he is more than capable of picking up his toys. You tell him what to pick up and where to put it and after awhile he will learn where everything goes. It's his room and he needs to clean it.

Two, if you think he has too many...especially toys that he's too old for then take one out when he's not looking and put it in a bag to donate to charity. Maybe you could even talk to him about donating toys to charity for kids that don't have nice toys. It might be a good civics lesson for him to give to charity. Call AmVets, the American Cancer Society and so forth until you find someone to pick them up...or find the nearest Salvation Army drop off.

Honestly, at six your son needs to do some chores...you might even consider an allowance at this point. You could use the allowance to teach him about saving for things he wants, saving for the future, and giving to charity or tithing at church.

My mother gave all of us allowance...my aunt thought it was ridiculous and just bought her boys what they needed. She figured birthday money was enough to teach them about money. My mother's kids are very responsible with money and my aunts boys are totally irresponsible, drowning in debt.

I'm a big advocate of chores and allowance starting at a very early age.