Too Old for American Girl Doll?

Let her have fun with them as long as she wants to. Unlike lots of 12 year olds, she is acting her age and not trying to act 17. Be glad!

Well, you're asking a lady who believed in santa until I was 12, played with dolls much later then that, and had an imaginary friend until 9-10. Iseem to manage in life fine. I think she will, too.

She's too old when she loses interest in them.
Twelve is a transitional age - not a little kid anymore, but not an adult, or even a teeanger yet.

I have not yet read any of other answers.
Saying this to you with concern for your daughter.

Please, just let your daughter be. Let her enjoy these last precious moments of her childhood without fear or condemnation from her own mother.

No girl has ever suffered any damage from loving her dolls at age 12.

Lighten up, mama. Are you sure this is about concern for your daughter, or is it some issue with dad and his "new fiancee' ?"

Just had to bring that up because I'd hate to see your daughter have to give up something she loves because of an issue that isn't about her.

Let her be. She'll know when she's ready to let go. Don't force it on her.

Sincerely,

J. F.

No, she's not too old for them. My 12 year old still loves her AG doll. She doesn't carry the doll around in public unless there's a special event that plans for bringing a favorite doll (like a tea party or "bring a doll and best friend to a movie" event). She brings it to sleepovers. She and each of her sisters all have one, and they play with them together. It's such sweet bonding time. Sometimes all they do is brush the hair together and chat.

I'll be honest... I'm 38 and wish someone would give ME an AG doll. I still get special edition Barbies as gifts and I love it. I still have several porcelain dolls and Boyd's bears that are musical. You're really never too old.

Your daughter probably finds comfort in her doll. It's a lovey. It's a friend. Why discourage her from it?

EDIT: I just wanted to also add that my eldest daughter was moved this past year to write about the issue her AG doll is all about. She has the Julie doll from 1974. The issue is about Women's Rights and Title 9. She did an entire term paper about Title 9 and did exceptionally well on it, and is very passionate about women's rights and young women's rights. She follows the plights of young girls and young women all over the world because she was so inspired.

My daughter is 12 and still likes her AG dolls too. She likes to change their outfits, etc. And she loves to look through the catalog and make lists of what she wants. She doesn't carry them around though (but never really did). I think it is fine. She has some other friends that are still into theirs too (and plenty who are not). Some of her peers are crazy boy-crazy already and act in ways that I would not want my daughter acting just yet (acting much older than they are, etc.). I say keep them young as long as you can b/c you can never go back. BTW, the AG books are really intended for girls ages 9-12 and if you look at the catalog, the matching outfits they sell for girl and doll are large enough for 12-year olds for sure. I think the fact that many girls younger than that have these expensive dolls says something about wanting our little ones to grow up faster too--which is somewhat pervasive in our society these days IMO.

Edited to add: One of my friends works at the local AG store and she was just telling me yesterday how many of the girls are our girls' age and even older. We are looking forward to an outing to the store sometime soon! And I have always love what the AG dolls and their stories represent: strong, courageous, intelligent and creative girls. All things I would love for my daughter to emulate.

I still had my Barbie dolls at 12. I loved them!
12 would be a perfect age to teach her how to make things for her American Girl dolls. She can learn to sew or knit or crochet for instance.
I had the Barbie townhome set up and my mom taught me how to sew. They had bed linens and pillows and curtains and carpets, the whole nine yards. My mom and I both made clothes for them.
American Girl dolls weren't around when I was that age. Had they been I am betting odds I would still have been playing with them. Those dolls are aimed at an older child. Recommended age doesn't even start until 8.

I don't think she's doing anything wrong. Let her be! She's enjoying her life and her childhood. She has plenty of time to be a "boring adult that can't do anything fun anymore".

When I've been in their store, I see lots of girls who look 12 or older...

Why would you want to pull her away from her childhood? Why don't you want her to enjoy what she naturally enjoys? My daughter is 11 and I am so glad she still loves her dolls and toys. In fact, we just got an American Girl store and she's planning on celebrating her birthday there with her three best friends (all of whom also have AG dolls). So many of her friends have moved on to texting and boys and competing with each other over looks. I am not at all looking forward to that change. She still loves my little pony and barbie and littlest pet shop. She is still sweet and innocent and enjoys her toys. My son will turn 9 next week and he can't wait to grow up - his desire to be older causes more problems than any dolls she has. She has found a few friends who share her interests and her best friends accept her for who she is. I think it's a mistake for you to draw those artificial boundaries like that.

No way. It is refreshing to hear a 12 year old still likes them. Let her be!

It's adorable, leave her alone. And sadly, she will probably lose interest in them completely in a year, and replace that interest with boys.

Mom, you will lose your baby soon enough -- don't rush it.

If your daughter were past the doll stage, she wouldn't be playing with them, no matter how many things she was given. Let her go ahead and enjoy her dolls. She isn't being "kept back" in some way. One day your girl will find she is too busy, and then she will pack her dolls up and keep them (they have been good friends, after all) or give them away.

I remember a last love of one of my dolls at 12. I was in 6th grade (middle school) . Putting her in her crib at night. My very best friend had moved far way that fall.. after living 2 houses down from me since we were 5..

But by about that New Years. I was done. So 12.5 yrs old.. Something just clicked. I was done.

Just let her be.. I am not sure of your relationship with your ex, but you may give them a heads up, that this may end pretty soon. If not a good relationship, just let it be. Not a big deal in the long run..

In the fall will she be in middle school or staying in a elementary school?
Her fist school dance is usually in 6th grade if she is in middle school.. That gives you all an idea of where she will be emotionally.

Definitely not too old!
My daughter enjoyed hers until she was 15 and had no time to play.

My daughter just turned 12 and she let go of her AG dolls on her own. I still love them, but this year she said she was done collecting.

She still plays with them, she does their hair, makes them stuff and dresses them, but she is done collecting.

Sadly I'm sure she'll be done playing with them altogether within a year.

Let your daughter let go of them on her own. My daughter is homeschooled so when she let them go, it wasn't because of peer pressure or anything. She was just ready to ask for more grown-up things for her birthday.

My guess is your daughter will be done within 6 months to a year on her own!

When I was 12 about half the girls still played with dolls and the other half had moved on. It is a transitional age. I remember when I was 12 my best friend wanted a Cabbage Patch Kid for Christmas and I wanted make-up. By the time we were 13 or 14 all of the girls were done with their dolls.

I don't think she's too old to play with the dolls or to love the dolls. I do think she's kind of old to be taking them everywhere she goes though. They are as much as a collector's item as they are a toy, so I'm sure there are plenty of grown women out there with AG dolls.

Kids grow up too fast these days. If she's still enjoying playing with dolls and isn't embarrassed by it, what's the harm? If her friends have them too, I really don't see why you're concerned about it at all.

I think you need to let it go. I don't see any problem with it whatsoever. And if her dad wants to buy her stuff for it, let him. You're not sharing finances anymore, so as long as he's up to date with any money he owes to you, let him do what he wants with the rest.

These are not "baby dolls." I hope you are not thinking of them that way. The historically based dolls are rooted in good historic fiction and the "just like me" dolls are designed to reflect girls' own appearances (if they want).

Twelve is not at all too old. We have been to two of the AG stores on trips, and now have one in our area just down the road, and whenever we've been in these stores, most of the girls we see are at least 9 and many are much older! I have seen girls who clearly were at least 12 to 14 years old, going around with friends the same age, each girl with an AG doll. For older girls, there can be a lot of interest in the clothes and accessories, furniture for the dolls, etc. And these dolls are considered collectibles by some adults, too.

Is this really about the doll, or about some larger concern you have that your daughter isn't "acting her age," or about a deeper conflict with her father over how to raise her?

There is no reason to rush a kid away from these dolls. You seem concerned that she "takes them out everywhere we go" -- could it be that it's a little embarrassing to you as an adult to have her seen with a doll, or that you fear others will judge you a bit for "letting her play with dolls at her age" or that they will judge her as being immature? .

Believe me, it's great that she and especially her friends still have the dolls and are interested in them. Expect the interest to wax and wane over time. My daughter is also 12 and has two AG dolls, and though she does not carry them with her (unless we are going to an AG place) she does enjoy trying new outfits on them and posing them in her room.

Her dad has the right idea! Don't let your sweet girl get in the middle of something between you and her dad. Just let your daughter enjoy the dolls.

If she still likes playing with the dolls and is still into them, I don't see that being a big problem. She may end up giving them up eventually on her own, before she turns 13. However, I think her father is mistaken if he thinks her playing with dolls is somehow going to protect her from the wrong types of influences. Kids do grow up too fast these days but that doesn't mean she isn't eventually going to be tempted by what is out there and start hanging out with a different crowd, and her playing with dolls are 12 doesn't mean these things cannot happen at 14. What he ought to be doing is having conversations with her about boys and resisting pressure from them and being true to herself. You can have the same conversations with her, about the changes she may start going through physically and emotionally, and what your expectations are for her behavior. Talking with her on a regular basis and maintaining open communication and a positive relationship will help her more than playing or not playing with dolls.

If she likes them, she's not too old for them. And at 12 years old, that's her determination, not yours. Frankly, to me it sounds more like you are jealous or don't agree with the amount of AG doll accessories that your ex buys your daughter, sorry.

How nice!
No way is 12 too old.

I was told I was too old for that (I was 13) and I'm still bitter @ those people.
It's refreshing she's not a kid who just sits with an iphone and wastes away. She is using her imagination!

Oh my goodness, M. - you don't know how lucky you are - I totally agree with her father - he is on target with your daughter.

I agree with everyone else. Let her enjoy the last year or so of her childhood. She will give them up when she's ready. She's not embarrassed about taking them places, nor are (apparently) your ex and his fiance. Are you embarrassed by it? Like others, I triggered off your comment about your ex and her fiance buying things for her, and agree that at least a tiny part of this might be your anxiety about them buying her things.

You will have so many other things to deal with as she enters her teen years, and many arguments to come. It's probably best not to make something as innocent as this be one of them!

When we are at the AG store, it appears to me that most of the girls are in the 11-12 age range, so that does seem like the sweet spot for these.

I don't think 12 is too old at all. I played with barbies until i was 12 or 13. My daughters birthday is in August and she will be 11 and she is getting her first one. I know she will be over the moon, all her friends have them and she has wanted one for a while now.
I have to agree with Leigh and think this is more about the relationship with the ex.
Many blessings to you and good luck

I'd be fine with her playing with them. Why do you want her to grow up too fast? Would you rather her have her nose stuck to a phone all day texting like most tweens/teens? Not me. I HATE seeing kids whether boys or girls with a phone or iPod in their face all day.

It's not a big deal as she'll tire of them before too long, and they'll be relegated to a shelf before you know it.

My DD will be 14 in August. I cannot tell you how I miss the innocence of her AG days. It wasn't that long ago, but yet it seems worlds away from her life now. Let her be. You will blink and the dolls will be gone.

I don't think I'd stop her from playing with them but I wouldn't let her take them places but that's because we have a rule about no toys go with us to the store. It can stay in the car but it does not go in.