Toddler Who Won't Sleep in Toddler Bed

Updated on May 07, 2008
A.P. asks from Minooka, IL
11 answers

My daughter is 25 months old and recently moved to a toddler bed. When sleeping in her crib, she went to sleep fine. Occasionally would wake up early or during the night, but overall was a great sleeper. She still takes one nap a day, and she sleeps with her door shut (as she has since she was a newborn). When she first moved to the toddler bed, she did well. Lately, she will cry if I put her in her bed for naps and spend her naptime on the floor by the door (she has not learned how to open the door yet). At bedtime, I will have to sit with her until she falls asleep or rock her to sleep. The past few mornings, she has wanted to start her day around 4:30 am. Her normal bedtime is between 8-8:30. I try to put her back to sleep, but as soon as I leave she is screaming. She is VERY strong-willed. Any help would be appreciated.

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K.H.

answers from Chicago on

I am going through the same exact thing right now. My son is 23 months and won't sleep in his toddler bed. He was perfect in his crib. I have been really concerned about this because I can't open the bedroom door because he is sleeping right in front of it. We have not completely solved the problem, but he's much better now. We do the same routine every night. He takes his bath, gets a snack, brushes his teeth, and picks out 2 books to read. The whole time I keep talking about what we are going to do next because it is almost bedtime. He says good night to everyone (he has two older sisters that I make "pretend" that they are going to bed too. He tucks them in). Then we read his books. I don't make him lay down in his bed yet, but he cannot get out of his bed. The last story I always read is 'Good Night Moon'. Then I tell him that Mommy has to go to Mommy's Bed and Cayden has to stay in Cayden's bed. We leave the door open now and watch him in the video monitor. The first couple of nights, he cried and tried to get out of bed, but everytime we saw him start to get out, we would say, " Stay in Bed". After 4 nights of this, he now plays in his bed, calling for me, but not crying. He got up in the middle of the night because he fell out of bed, and as soon as I got into his room, he climbed back up in his bed and went back to sleep. Oh, I forgot.... at naptime I would bribe him. I would tell him that if he stayed in his bed and took a good nap, he could have a popscicle when he woke up. This worked really well and as soon as he woke up, I would give him his popscicle.
I hope this helps you. Consistency is the key!! Don't give up!!

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J.S.

answers from Chicago on

I look forward to your responses because I have the exact same situation. My strong willed 3 year old refuses to sleep in her toddler bed. Although she knows how to open the door now so its a non-stop battle till she gets so tired she falls asleep whereever she is. If you try to put her in bed she just gets up more upset and tired and throws bigger fits.

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M.M.

answers from Chicago on

I have heard of so many different methods for this and I am so nervous...the day is coming when we will have to make the swtich too. I know this sounds silly, but start recording the Super Nanny...she is GREAT with the bedtime thing and quite a few episodes deal with that very issue. It always seems like there is a power play for a few nights, but then things settle down and the kids realize that this is what they need to do. She's pretty amazing. Good luck!!!!

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K.C.

answers from Chicago on

Hi A.,

I am also looking forward to seeing the responses! My son (2 1/2) started climbing out of his crib on a regular basis. We converted the crib to a toddler bed and life had not been the same since. He will not nap and is up way past bedtime. He is very crabby as a result. I tried a baby gate on his door but he climbs right over that. The screaming/crying is also keeping up my 5 year old so now I have 2 crabby and over tired boys on my hands. Of course my very strong willed son will nap in a bed at daycare and doesn’t giver her any trouble?!

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B.P.

answers from Chicago on

Is it possible that she has an ear infection or something like that? I know of many toddlers and babies that change their sleeping habits when they're not feeling well. I'm thinking this just because she started off okay, but then wasn't okay later.
Is there something that is 'scaring' her about the bed? Maybe she's nervous if there is no bar, she might feel she's going to roll out of bed, or maybe there's a 'monster under the bed' or something like that.
I would try to make her bed as exciting as possible to sleep in. When my daughter changed to her big bed, we let her pick out the sheets and blankets that she wanted to sleep with, we bought her new jammies that she got to pick out at the store and we let her pick out a couple stuffed animals to have an 'in-bed slumber party' with. She loved it!
Maybe she's starting a new phaze, and feels she doesn't need a nap anymore. If she's just being stubborn, I would just let her cry it out. Or maybe her schedule is shifting. Try pushing her nap-time off by 30-45 minutes to be sure that she's tired when you put her down for her nap. Maybe she'll fall right to sleep. Stay strong and Good luck!!!!!

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K.B.

answers from Chicago on

My son had trouble with the toddler bed for awhile too. He got it for his second birthday, and almost every night for a few months (or more), he would fall asleep by the door. My husband and I decided to let him do this since he seemed to fall asleep okay that way, and we would just move him to his bed when we went up for the night. He was sound asleep at that point, typically, and he then slept fine in his bed until morning.

Hope you figure it out! Good luck!

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M.H.

answers from Springfield on

My now 13 year old did this when he switched at 2. We would find him asleep under his bed, in his closet...We finally figured out he was missing the security of the bars around him. Try getting one of those princess netting things that hang from the ceiling, or put up some curtains that will hang down on the sides like a little tent.

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S.E.

answers from Chicago on

My son stopped taking naps right before he was 2 years old. Best thing because never a problem at night sleeping. He still sleeps 10 hours if he can get it in. So you may want to try stopping the naps.
Second when he moved to a toddler bed he would surround himself if all his stuffed animals. He said it made him feel like the sides of his crib. May try that. Or do you have the side rail on the toddler bed? If not that may be something that will help her fell more secure.

Good Luck

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

My almost 3-year old boy started sleeping in a twin bed at 24 months, a month before his new brother was born so I wanted to free up the crib. He slept great in his crib also, so I wasn't sure how the transition would go. We'd talked about the big boy bed and tried to make it an exciting experience, but when I finally decided it was time to make the switch we had to say "no going back" or it would confuse him! So, the first night was SO HARD. He SCREAMED louder than I'd ever heard him, and this was after a nice calm bedtime routine, story, etc. As soon as I would leave, he would run out of the room. At first I thought I'd try to do the Super Nanny method of just putting him back and eventually he'd stop running out, but after 8 times in a row with no rest it was just making me angry and I knew that wasn't a good thing. Then, I put up up a pressure gate, but he just knocked that right over (and fell on top of it, crying..). So it was time for plan C. I closed the door and held it closed (someone else I knew reversed the doorknob so you could lock it from the outside- just another option), and waited out the screams. It was so hard, but it was seriously just 4-6 minutes of him trying to pull the door open and screaming/crying (I timed it) and then he calmed down, and climed back into bed. He whimpered a few more minutes, but an hour or so later I checked on him and he'd climed into bed, laid on his pillow, pulled up the sheet, and was fast asleep! He'd also turned on his Cars lamp on the lampstand, and that probably helped him. To this day he sleeps with the closet light on and a nightlight, something he never did in a crib. So maybe there just needs to be some changes, and things to keep her comforted at first, but you have to be consistent.
Also, that next morning he woke up really really early (like 5 am) and I said, "No, it's not time to get up yet" (he was super whiney too) and put him back in bed and did the door holding thing again for just a couple minutes, and he went back to sleep. They need to see that bedtime/naptime means staying in bed, or the consequence is closing the door to keep them in there. It sounds mean to do this, but isn't it meaner to deprive them of clear expectations and consequences, and a good nap and good nights' sleep? Think of the long term- a short time of crying and testing you will produce days, weeks, and hopefully years of good sleep for you all!
This may not work for everyone, but it sure worked for us. My son sleeps 8pm to 7am these days, and takes a 1-2 hour nap.
I wish you the best. Tough love! :)

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L.G.

answers from Chicago on

We just moved my son (25 months) to a toddler bed a few weeks ago. We hyped the "big boy bed" for a couple of weeks prior to the switch and made sure he was in the room with us when we took the crib apart and put his new bed in there so he could watch the transition taking place. I also had him pick out the bedding himself so he would be excited about his new sheets. He was really excited about his new bed all the way up until bed time. Then after several times getting out of the bed and running around and I had to tell him he needed to stay in the bed, he just sat there sobbing the saddest way and saying "Not my bed, not my bed" over and over. I almost started sobbing myself. But I told him he was a big boy now and big boys sleep in beds just like Mommy and Daddy sleep in a bed. He cried a little longer and then laid down and went to sleep. The next night was a little easier, and the night after that he went straight to his bed.

I do stay in the room with him while he falls asleep, so that helps him feel comfortable. I also put a gate up on the door so that if he wakes up at night he won't wander around and hurt himself. Overall, I think we have been lucky. I was really worried about the transition and it went pretty well. Good luck to you!

L.

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L.E.

answers from Chicago on

Honestly, it may be more a sleep phase she's going thru rather than her toddler bed being an issue. My girls go thru those moments. My three year old is going thru one of those stages now. She's always done fantastic, she's been in a full sized bed for over a year now and she's going thru a big stalling/cling to us kind of stage when it comes to naps/bedtime. We stay consistant and she's starting to settle again. We also made a little list of all the things she stalls with, so we go thru that w/ her at bedtime...beat her to the punch in a way. We check her closet (to make sure MonstersInc isn't in there), we get her water, we turn on her music and her fan, we give kisses and hugs and make sure her blankets are nice and perfect. Then she feels settled and usually she only comes out of her room once, if at all, if we do that with her. Otherwise, she comes out of her room over and over, with one of these complaints for each trip down the stairs.

Just try to be consistant, loving but firm, and she'll eventually get the idea.

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