Toddler Hairbrushing Drama

I remember fighting with my mom when brushing my hair because it always was bad. Every night I had my mom brush it and braid it before I went to bed, it helped for the most part.

I use a lot of good adult conditioner (the kids stuff just doesn't work) on my girls and use a pick and/or my fingers while they are in the shower/bath while the conditioner is still on them to comb through it. We play a game of who can get the silkiest smoothest hair. If you let them play for a while in the tub/shower with the conditioner in their hair, it will eventually loosen up the knots so it doesn't hurt. I have to do this to my own hair so I know what they are going through (without the playing for me!) Also with my 2 year old who is crazy sensitive about the hair brushing, I will give her the brush let her brush her own hair and then I'll sneak in a few fixes and she doesn't even know that I'm doing it while she is.

My daughter used to hate when I brushed her hair at that age. She's 13 now. I used a lot of spray detangler but, beyond that, I have no other advise...just sympathy. We recently bought a dog....our dog HATES when I brush her hair. I'm starting to take this personally!!! Good luck!

Oh, how I feel your pain! I have a 3-1/2 year old daughter and she has tons of tangles. The only thing that I find that helps is a brush I bought at Sally's that is not a detangling brush, but it's very soft brush. The name of it is Phillips Military extra soft bristles (#896075). It wasn't that expensive either. I use that to comb her hair after her bath, but in the morning I use a detangling comb that I got at Target because the brush doesn't quite cut it for trying to style her hair. I think it's made by either Goody or Conair. She still screams when I comb her hair, but I start with using the Sally brush and then go to style it with the detangling comb and it helps to lessen the pain ~ somewhat. I hope this helps you!

I'm not sure how much help this will be. I have an almost five year old. She is not thrilled about having her hair combed, but she will let me do it. Some days she'll argue, but I try to explain to her that if I don't comb her hair today, it will be much harder to comb tomorrow. She's also felt how that feels. Also, I comb her hair immediately after her bath because the water seems to loosen the tangles a bit. On days she doesn't have a bath, I use a spray bottle with water. She actually has fun with the spray bottle so it may be something to try. It's hard with 4 yr olds though because you cannot really reason with them. My daughter is just now starting to understand that we comb it to keep it healthy.

T.,

you have some really good advice so far.

Both my girls had very long hair... by the time my first daughter was 2, it was so long, we could tuck in the waist of her pants! I suggest braids if you can... or tying it up some other way when she'll be outside playing - the slightest amount of wind can wreak havoc on the hair in the way of knots, especially if her hair is fine.

My other tip is, brush her hair BEFORE it gets wet... it makes it so much easier to brush after a shower/bath... sometimes even using conditioner won't get all the tangles.

If i forget to do this, I will use a product called Keratin Mist from CHI (it's a salon product) - a few sprays - literally - and my tangles practically come apart by themselves. It is more expensive than 'No More Tangles' but it goes a LONG way. My hair is down to my waist, my husbands is pretty close to that and both my older kids have hair to the middle of their backs.

remember to brush from the bottom up, and hold the hair you are brushing so it doesn't hurt her scalp. Then... when she's all done... lay on the lavish compliments about how good she did, how beautiful she looks, etc.

Good luck!

~J.

What about buying her a doll with hair that she can brush and you can encourage her to do that while you do her hair? Or maybe she can brush YOUR hair (or Dad's) while the other parent does hers?

Just ideas - and reading that makes me glad I have boys! Lol. I had long hair when I was little (past my butt) and I know there were some battles with it. I hated it. I now have VERY short hair.

My 4 yr old argues about getting her hair brushed too. Something that kind of helped is my Mom got her a 'magic brush', she got it from Fuller Brush - it's kid sized and has natural bristles that are soft. 'Grandma' presented it to her in a pretty bag with a bow. Anyway, that is the ONLY brush she will tolerate.

Also, when I let her do it herself and we have a race - I brush my hair at the same time and we see who gets done first, she likes that (that works for getting dressed and jackets on too). But then of course there is the 'battle' over getting tangles that she missed. Now that she likes computer games I let her sit at the computer while I brush her hair, that way she is distracted somewhat. I also noticed it goes easier if I don't put it off 'til last minute - like if we're getting ready to go somewhere I try to get her hair done first, and take my time and that seems to de-stress the whole thing a bit.

I skip the night time hair brushing - if she's clean and her teeth are brushed, we're ahead of the game!

Hope there was something helpful there for you. :-)

Hi there! I feel your pain as well as your daughters!

For detangling hair, use a wide tooth comb and start at the ends of the hair and get those tangles out first and then go closer and closer to the scalp until they are all out. Also, hold her hair close to her head and tight so you are not pulling on the scalp as you are brushing/combing.

Brushes with nylon bristles will cause breakage and definately pull the hair. Vent brushes are ok as long as they have the little plastic like balls on the ends of the bristles so it does not hurt her scalp. I would suggest going to a place like Sallys and asking them for suggestions on brushes.

Also, at night time and when she goes out to play, if her hair is long enough to put in a pony tail I would definately do that. Make sure you are not using rubber bands though or the ones with metal on them. Those will also cause breakage and in the end more tangles!

Good luck brushing her hair without getting so frustrated you pull yours out!
Blessings!

I have very thick hair and have always been very tender headed. I can remember crying when my mom brushed my hair. Just try to remember to be gentle. Go slow, work from the bottom to the top. definatly try to keep her hair pulled back, use ties that do not get caught in her hair easily. You may have to experiment with them. And i would brush her hair before it gets wet. Also, make sure you are rinsing her hair well and it does not have shampoo/conditioner build-up in it. When I get shampoo built-up in my hair, it is an absolute mess to brush. a good rinse to use is put a little white viniger in a cup, then fill the cup the rest of the way with water and pour over the hair, then rub it in, and rinse well with water. I would maybe try using once a week or so. The smell does not stay in your hair like you would think it does.

Try having your husband do it. My daughter is way better about that kind of stuff for my hubby than me.