My son will be three in May. Over the last couple of months he's had quite an interest in his "privates." Aside from trying to discourage this in front of people which hasn't been too big of an issue, the biggest challenge we have had is he will wet himself because of this. There have been nights where I have changed PJs and sheets up to three times, as he will wake up wet and cold. I don't think he's waking up in the night doing this but rather doing this before sleeping and leaving "himself" in a position where he ends up spraying all over the front and sides of his clothes. This problem has recently carried over into daycare during naps now.
We have tried the following:
1. Wearing a onsie so he couldn't undo his diaper. He eventually learned to come in thru the sides of his onesie.
2. Wear zip up PJs with a safety pin to prevent him from unzipping it. He worked the safety pin until he bent it and got it off. I really thought I had him beat with this one until I heard him open his diaper on the baby monitor! :)
3. Cut off the feet of the PJs and put them on backwards. Somehow he managed to get his off at daycare. We are both still trying to figure out HOW he did this.
4. Lastly, PJs backwards with a safety pin. We really thought there is NO WAY he could get out of this. Well, he was wet today when he got up from his nap. When my daycare provider asked him why he was wet he told her "I play with my pee pee in front."
When I ask him what happens when he does this, the tells me "get wet" so I think he understands what happens when he does this, but it's not enought to stop it.
Any thoughts?
Thank you all for your suggestions and advise. I have to say I didn't think this was at all related to potty training. But, in the last three days my son has wanted to go potty A LOT. Of course, the M&Ms rewards are driving this but it has never worked before. Yesterday he went potty four times at day care and about seven more times at home. He wants to keep goingm even if it's a few drops, and I think this might be facination of the whole process. We have doubled up on diapers, duct taped them shut and continued to use the backward PJs for sleeping. I have also purchased a belt (didn't even think they made them that small) for him to wear during the day to discourage undoing his pants. So by the time he figures out how to undo the belt, this phase hopefully will be over.
This little one is more than ready to potty training. He will fall in love with his first little potty.
my daughter did this for about 2 weeks at about 2.5. I don't know if it was sensory or not, I would put her to bed and she would strip naked including her diaper and then go to sleep and pee on herself. We tried a bunch of stuff, including taping her diaper on with packing tape or duct tape but she managed to take it off down her legs. Finally I got so sick of it that I made her sleep in it after she peed, just left her in her bed, I didn't even put a new diaper on her. After two nights of that, she stopped. We potty trained her pretty soon after that.
hes starting to sound like Houdini,have you talked with your Peidatrition yet,?
Can I ask if he is ready for the potty training? If he is interested in his... this may be a good time to start the potty training. he may like the feel of underwear. I am not sure if they ever out grow this exploring. my 7 yr old son wasnt to bad but my 5 yr old.. constantly touching himself.
I would kind of agree with trying the potty training. He seems to know what it's there for and maybe it would give some meaning to it. Put a kind of goal in his mind. Do you think maybe he does know when he has to pee, and because he doesn't know what else to do with it, he plays with himself? I would ask my husband to talk to him and explain what it feels like when he needs to pee. Maybe the potty training will go quickly because he already knows that sensation, but doesn't know what to do about it.
Sounds like he's "overdue" to be potty trained. If he was trained then he wouldn't be able to peepee on himself. There could be another reason he wakes up during the night..a little hunry or that he has to potty. Don't give hem any liquid before bed and make sure you have him peepee before laying him down. His tummy must be full, don't forget. Good luck mommy. Remember, some MEN never get over touching themselves...they say they are "making an adjustment".
I think that these are two different issues.
I think the toucing himself part is normal. As Gina said, grown men call it "adjusting." LOL Yes it's annoying but he will learn when it is appropriate and when it is not.
I don't know if the wetting is caused by him touching himself, I'm sure he would be peeing even if he didn't do this. I think that he is just peeing through his diapers. My sons did this as they got bigger too. The sides of their clothes would be soaked (and the bed.) Look for more absorbant diapers (huggies overnights.) I would also start to potty train him. This will not help with the touching (he will have to outgrow that) but it should help with the wet bed.
Good luck, I don't think there is anything wrong with your son.
J., I have to say, I have never heard of this. It must be quite stressful for you. Have you looked into other things, aside getting him to stop. If you look for the cause you may better come up with a solution. I think there is more to it than just curiosity. Maybe it is because he knows he gets attention from this or maybe something has him stressed and this is how he is handling it. I would think of talking to a doctor whether it be a ped or pshycologist. I wish you good luck. Please repost info to let us know how things go.
J., I went thru this with my son. It made me smile as I was reading it. Your son will outgrow it. But until he does.... The pj's on backwards helps. If your son is almost 3 he is old enough to start potty training. I would (what we did) take him to the bathroom at night before bed, get him up again in 2 hours to go and pretty much every couple hours for a couple days. Tell him the peepee is for potty and that he has to pee in the bathroom. he will be too tired to "explore" and will start using the potty. on his bed we put the sheet then a plastic sheet sideways and another sheet over it tucked into the sides. do as many layers of this as needed. then when he wets himself all you need to do is pull off that one layer. still have a mess of laundry but the cleaning / changing bed goes smoother. good luck. it does only last a short time. my son started this before he was a year old. i would get himout of the crib and he had pulled his private out the side of the diaper and had it smushed there. big wet mess every morning. but like i said it only lasts a short time
S.
It is normal for young ones to "explore" and if a big deal is not made of it, they will eventually stop. However another possiblility could be that there are problems with this issue regarding someone else in the family. Have you asked your husband what his memories are regarding this issue? How much of that did he do or does he still do? I know of many people whose husband had a secret life of pornography and taking care of themselves and it opened the door to their children having many problems even though it was "hidden." Sex in marriage should be exclusive with your mate and never by yourself. It is an indicator of problems with true intimacy being substituted by false intimacy. I suggest to talk to your husband frankly about it. But be forewarned, many will not admit to having a problem due to the shame involved. Check out the story of a couple by searching the IBLP website and finding the "Whatever it Takes" story they openly share about their struggles in this area. http://iblp.org/iblp/discipleship/conferences/
Hi J.,
Maybe your little boy is ready for potty training. When he fills the need to "go potty" , then maybe he connected the idea of "checking himself out" will relieve himself. It was just a thought. I have 5 children myself so have have gone through potty training stages. My first child was one and a half years old when he was trained. Good luck,
J. J.
Well that is a first for me. I've never heard of such a thing. I do believe he's just wetting himself.
I don't think a boy that age can ejaculate. If they can, I'm sure it would not be nearly enough to soak him so he wakes up wet and cold.
A male can not ejaculate and pee at the same time.
So I would say he's wetting himself because of the good feelings.
Now the other issue is why is he going potty so much that it soaks him. And why does he pee when he plays with himself?
That really is a first though. I've never even heard of a child being that obssessed...well maybe one. My aunt says they have a four year old in her class that plays with himself everyday during naptime. They have tried to discourage him, but they finally had to separate him from the other kids during naptime because the others were asking too many questions and some parents were not too keen on their kids learning about that just yet.
I'm not sure if they have ever broken him of it. I'll have to ask her what they did if anything to get him to stop doing it in public.
I feel for ya...that's a tough one.
He's three now and probably should start potty training so what will you do then? I think you will have to find a way to convince him that he's making a mess and that he has to stop peeing on himself because he's a big boy now. Potty training him might be what you need to do so that he can go on the toilet when he has that strong urge.
Obviously he's holding his pee for long periods and then letting go when he lays down and that's why he's soaking himself.
I would suggest that you one start potty training him so he knows that he needs to pee pee in the toilet and not in his pants.
Two I would slow down the amount of fluids he gets before time to lay down. Cut him off to very little about an hour or two before he's to lay down.
When he starts potty training then make sure you have him sit on the potty and go pee pee before he lays down. I do that with the 19 month old I watch and she wakes up dry everytime from her naps. (I've heard girls are easier to potty train)
I do believe that he's holding his pee pee for long periods of time. That is one indication that he's ready to start potty training. Maybe he is potty trained during the day (you didn't mention that) and just wears a diaper to sleep. In that case not sure what you can do really. He may just have a bed wetting problem. But then that begs the question when do you stop putting diapers on him???? He could wet the bed until he hits puberty...both my brothers did.
My mom had to cut their fluids a few hours before bedtime. She also had to wake them up twice during the night...and even that didn't always work. Both of them quit as soon as they hit puberty though. And I know they both played with themselves because we all shared a room until my dad built an addition onto the house when I was about 7 or so. I don't believe that had anything to do with their bed wetting issues though.
Just a few things to think about. I hope something in that will help.
This website has some good ideas for dealing with "annoying behaviors." They don't mention this one specifically, but I hope that you might be able to borrow from a suggestion for another behavior....
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/6/T063900.asp#T062500
This one doesn't exactly fit, but maybe instructive?....
http://askdrsears.com/faq/db9.asp
Best wishes.
Dear J.,
Have you discussed this with his pediatrician? Maybe it is time too.
Sounds like a trip to the pediatrician is your best bet. He/She should be able to guide you in the right direction. I haven't yet heard of a toddler being that determined in "exploring themselves". I'm sure potty training is just around the corner too...Take care!
Maybe it is time to go to big boy pants. He is 3 and understands it seems all about the potty part. Try and see if you can get him to be a "big boy" with new "big boy" underware.
J.
