To leave..or Stay?

I would suggest taking a break and see how that goes. Maybe, being away for a bit can give perspective.

Wish you nothing but the best, whatever you decide!!

Aww, dont go. I just deactivated my facebook account today, it had become way too time consuming and I decided I really didnt need to get all the info I was getting from there on a daily basis.
I suppose I will be on here more now...
I've heard it's gotten "troll-y", but if we would learn to ignore them they would go away a lot faster.
And we shouldnt be quick to judge some of the questions, there are legitimately LAME things happening out there in real life. I see it everyday in my job.
Sigh.
I hope the hospital stay is short and all that goes well.

I haven't felt the need for a Mamapedia break for over 2 years. Why? I stopped taking things personally, stopped reading and replying to all the blatant troll posts, and, since the election's over I've come down from my soap box (at least til 2015 or so ;-)

I did deactivate my Facebook account 2 weeks before Lent started and that has been great for me.

I usually come on here when I don't want to talk to anyone on the phone or in person, but still want to connect and relax. MP can be real' therapeutic sometimes. Or just give me reprieve from my own head/life. Or give me a chuckle.

Honestly, I'm a little embarrassed by how bummed out the late drama feels. I don't like it at all.

Anyway. I'm ready to hold hands and sing kumbaya. I think it will blow over. Always has in the past, right?
_____
ETA: That's lovely Marda. I'm adopting your point of view :-)

I like reading your posts so I hope you stay. smile

To the more practical side. You can't close your account. At least I don't see anything telling how to do that. What you do is just stop coming on the site. So, anyway, why not just take a break.

The last few weeks have been rough. I suggest that everything happens for a reason and that perhaps our experiences with trolls and negative posts is to teach us to learn how to ignore what has caused us stress. We can ignore those posts. And then spend time with the posts that are helpful. This skill is extremely helpful in everyday life. All too often we create our own stress by letting negative things over which we have no control take control of us.
______________________________
Thanks Ephie and Peg M.

Just join the FB group!

I love it over there because I can ask something stupid and no one calls me stupid. I can post something funny and no one asks what do you really mean.

Three weekends in a row some psycho member has created fake usernames and attacked Cheryl and I. How do I know they are psycho? Because they actually think we are the same person! I have just about had it with this place but there is still this huge group of people here that have not joined that group and I would miss them.

So I deal with the trolls and yes, I make fun of them in the group.

Wait, aren't you in the group or did I dream that?
_________________________________
S.H. read the thought I would share post.

I will miss you if you leave, Michele/cat. I have always appreciated your thoughts. And your positivity.

You sound so very weary. Taking the negative posts personally is truly a big drain, so I leave the sniping to those who have the energy for it (or seem to take some kind of pleasure in it???). I'm just not responsible for other people's behavior. When I have time, I've learned to scan and skip to the few requests with which I have a genuine personal interest or experience.

I just ignore the occasional criticism from perfect strangers telling me what they think of me, a perfect stranger. How would they even know? I am terribly flawed, but they are actually reflecting their own issues and values, not mine.

I have taken time-outs recently for reasons of excess busyness and shaky health, and it's been fine. But I try to be one of the compassionate voices, because that's so badly needed these days.

I dearly hope your beloved recovers from whatever he's suffering from. Wishing you the best, whether you stay or go.

Added: I'm thinking of a whole bouquet for Marda – great comments!

Ya'll are making me sad. Love you Cat.

:(

Lots and lots of hugs. This isn't a flounce. You have plenty on your plate and I would take a break in your situation too.

Yes, the meltdowns/breakdowns are making me shake my head. I don't think anyone has a monopoly on 'rightness' (I certainly know I don't, I can only speak from experience), and I think there are some people who likely need to walk away for a little while from this site, too. They are taking things far too personally.

But you're right. It's not a particularly pleasant event to be a spectator of. Frankly, if my son didn't want to ONLY talk about Legos and Star Wars 24/7, I might not be on here so much. :p

Take good care of yourself, Cat. Whatever you choose. And come back with no hard feelings if and when you choose.:)

don't leave, just take a break

I'm sorry to hear about your Peter, Cat. I hope this passes soon (I don't know anything about what's wrong, in case you've talked about it here.) Usually by Monday afternoon, the troll posts are gone. So you could wait until Monday afternoons to come on here and ignore the site during the weekends.

You're a valued member here. If you need to, take a break but don't leave. If you value your privacy, just stay on here and come and go as you please.

That's really funny, Jo. Just chalk it up to the person being new here LOL!!

Dawn

Well, you can check out any time you want, but you can never leave...

Seriously, there's no way to close your account. Three years from now, someone will dig up an old post and comment and you'll get some wacky message from mamapedia saying someone commented on your message and you'll be like "what the hell is this" and then you'll be like "aw, I have no idea what that password is anymore" but then you'll be like "man, now I want to know what I even wrote" and you'll be really curious why someone was stalking your questions three years later and you'll try to forget it, but then you'll have this nagging feeling that you're still having the same problem you asked about three years ago and you'll wonder if this one comment will really be the solution to all the troubles you've been having so you'll try really hard to remember your password and you'll think back to what apartment number you had in 2013 and see if your password has anything to do with that and you'll finally figure out that you should just get password help from mamapedia and when you finally do you'll log in after three hours of trying to figure it out just to discover some troll made some stupid nonsensical comment on a JFF post about laundry detergent and you'll lament the three hours of your life that you'll never get back, but all of a sudden you'll be surfing questions and just like that, you're back on mamapedia.

Better just to take a break...

ETA: I need to read ahead!! Jo beat me to the invite!!! (wait - am I allowed to invite people???)

Michele:

I have kept you and Peter in my thoughts and prayers!! I should have done a better job of keeping in touch with you to let you know.

I wouldn't close my account. People go away for a while and come back...I'd hate to lose you. You offer a lot of great advice.

No, I don't see this as a flounce! You are right...the ugliness has been bad lately. Yes, I have been a part of it. I'm TRYING to step away...from the drama....

Please don't go...please join us on facebook!! (those embers who are catty, of course!!) :)

I'm sorry your Peter is not doing well. We would miss you Cat, but understand your feelings. I, for one, have appreciated your gentle guidance on occasion. Best wishes and peace in whatever you decide.

I sincerely hope you don't, but understand the need to narrow focus in crisis in order to keep moving forward, and how when things are life & death, the tolerance for trivia sinks to the sub-sub-basement.

When my son was in the hospital 2 years ago for several months, at BEST I dabbled in MP for 6mo. I found my solace & laughter in other parents of sick & dying children... Only touching base here to keep up with friends. Go read something A wrote, laught at something B wrote, smile at something C wrote. I'd just click on profile names at 3am to stay awake, mostly. Although, unfortunately I did post from time to time (quite crankily).. But "everyone" knew I was "in a state" and cut me a lot of slack. I also judiciously ETA'd apologies.

Point being: We love you here. Enough that while Im sure we all want you to stay for OUR benefit... What we want most is for you to do what you need to do in your own life that's best for you & your happiness. Stay. Drift in & out. Focus your energy elsewhere. Heck, all 3! As you need to.

Be happy. Be well. Know that your presence has made our lives inestimably better. And do what you need to do for yourself. Whatever that may be. (Although I certainly hope to see you around from time to time!)

(((( >^..^<))))

Hugs, Catwalk
May blessings be upon you and yours

We are going through a low point right now, that's for sure. There was a bigger low point when politics almost killed us. I have appreciated various answers of yours. We would be poorer for your absence.

Cat,
Sorry you're considering leaving.
I value you advice and input.
Prayers for Peter, of course...
All the best, whatever you decide.

Michele/Cat

I have enjoyed your insight to issues posted on the site. Please do what you need to do but remember we here are always thinking of you.

I, too, can remember like Riley the night time visits to this site when you are in the hospitla at 2 to 3 am and nothing to do and you are up. We turned to Mommasouce/pedia to find out what is or has happened. There was a woman back then that had a son in hospital that was touch and go and I find out now that he did pull through.

You are part of a virtual community of people who do care about you even if we don't see each other face to face.

Take of yourself and Peter. I will keep you both in my thoughts.

the other S.

PS Take a break and pop in to keep us updated.

first off, i'm SO sorry about your love. prayers and positive energy to both of you.
no, i'm not leaving, and i sure wish you wouldn't. i so enjoy your thoughtful responses. i just ignore the trolls. my tolerance for the drama and infighting comes and goes. but there's enough good stuff here that for me, it outweighs the silliness.
okay, it's sometimes more ugly than silly, i'll grant you that.
but there's also an awful lot of outpouring of support, and friendship, and even love. there's good advice, and perspectives i would never have come up with on my own. a lot of sharing of good stuff.
i hope you stay, hon.
khairete
S.
ETA, veronica P FTW!!!!

I am so sorry about your SO test results. I missed that post but will say prayers for him (and you).

Re:leaving.... I would miss your opinions and advice but understand you need to do what is best for you.

I am glad I saw this though.

Hi Catwalk,

It's all been a bit Jerry Springerish, hasn't it? Sometimes when you're going through something stressful it's good to have a little distraction like Mamapedia - as long as all the bickering doesn't add to your stress!

I too am bewildered by all that's happened here and the talk of a Facebook club etc.

It should all settle down soon.

Yes, sometimes I feel the same way but usually just skip the drama posts and avoid the negativity. I take mamapedia time-outs for this reason and also because life is often too busy.

You have far more important things going on in real life, and your time and energy are needed there at the moment.

Maybe just give it some time? Come here or the FB group if you need some support? When/if you feel ready, you can always jump back in. Many have been uplifted by your words over the years, and you'd be missed. For every mature and helpful person like you who leaves, the ratio of helpful to non-helpful gets skewed in the wrong direction.

I hope for health, healing, and strength for you and Peter. Take care.

I've been feeling that way as of late. I have enjoyed your feedback. But I do get sick of quick to judge, not answering the question responses.

Sending hugs.....

Awwww - why don't you just take a break for a bit and go from there ? I just answer the questions I want to or feel that I can make a contribution. All thetroll stuff - I may read to get a laugh but I don't get caught up in it. I think you have been helpful and I enjoy reading your answers. I hope you just take your break and come back !

I hear you. I left facebook because of the craziness, and this used to be such a nice, quiet place...the past few weekends, especially, have been full of wack-a-doos. I've considered leaving here a few times as well.

Maybe just take a break. Sometimes that's all you need!! Trust me, this can't stay amusing for long to these people, right? (Fingers crossed.) If it's because you need to focus on other things in life, then prayers for you and I hope everything turns out okay!!

It is a big drain. I am feeling the same as you.

I am so sorry that your love is in hospital. I hope things get better for you soon!

No such thing as closing your account. Theres only the self control of not logging in. Surely you don't consider Mamapedia a waste of your time with the silliness, trolls, and cattiness?
----
When I realized this site was a time waster and at times a waste of emotion, I tried to get rid of my account, thats how I know. So just take a break. And if you find you keep logging in, then you can join the likes of me and many other self-confessed addicts. I cope by being more selective about what i open and respond to. I engage less than I used too. I'm like a drunk with a two beer limit.
Hope you do better than me.

@ Jo W.- what the heck is the Facebook group???

Catwalk... just take a break?
Aw....

Didn't know one can even "close" their Mamapedia account?

hugs to you...hope all goes well for 'Peter'.

please come back to keep us updated. :)

Please don't leave...you make this a better place. The tides will change and things will get better:)

Why close your account, you can take a break and when you come back, don't read a book before you can see the poster is a troll.

Didn't you see the woman yesterday, that just wanted to stir it up? Did you see today that her posts have ALL been removed? Why? because most of us just reported her and opted to ignore her for the most part.

Do what you need to do.

I have nothing monumental to add. However, I sincerely wish you and yours the very best and hope all turns out well for you.

Wow.... First I'm sorry about Peter. Second, I didn't know there was so much ugliness on this site. I'm not on here often and I actually just posted my 2nd question this year. I've heard about the ugliness but never experienced it (knock on wood....lol).

Sorry it's gotten so bad that you are shutting down your account. Wow....

Sending prayers and hugs your way. I have enjoyed your imput and would miss it. :(

I've considered this myself for the same reason (ie ugliness). I actually complained to mamapedia about someone who really cut down another mama on here, it really bothered me, but they said "everyone has a right to their opinion." To which I replied, even if it's mean and cruel? They didn't care and that still bothers me that they aren't willing to protect people on here from being attacked. I feel like it has gotten worse over the years and it feels like high school. now I don't spend as much time on here as I used to. I hope you make the right decision for you and that things work out for you and your love.

Hi, Michele:
Close your account. You can always reopen it when you
have the time.

All the Best.
D.

"Resist not evil." Meaning, let the jerks go and see the good and deserving on this site (as well as Facebook). I read MamaP and find so much here to help so many. I often forward certain blogs to those of my friends who do not get MamaP since there is so much wisdom and love here. And the rest? Not worth getting excited about. I like the many ideas posted to you of giving it a break for a while. Sometimes, I just delete MamaP emails without reading them. Then I read something like today's main post about the widow and I am glad that I read it, even if I cannot comment to her. Look for the good and you will find it. Let go the rest. Bless you and Peter.

I stayed off the site for approximately a year & now I've started popping back on here & there.
I too got tired of the snipping & such, got busy with life & didn't have time, and honestly got kinda bored.
Even now there is still a bit of the snipping & lots more of the trolling!
I've been a member of the site since 2006 (maybe even 05) & find it an interesting place to get some different opinions & viewpoints.
Maybe just take a break for a while & I hope your love leaves the hospital soon.