To Have Number 3 or Not, That Is the Question.

First off. God will never give us more than we can handle. He will present you with opportunities so that you will be able to provide for your family.

Second, I don't know a single person who wishes they WOULD NOT have had the children they have.... I only know those who REGRET NOT HAVING MORE BECAUSE SOMETHING IS MISSING FROM THEIR FAMILY>.........

This is a decision that you and your husband need to decide. Not us moms on here. Pray about it as a family and you will be able to make peace with a decision one way or another.......

I can totally relate. I want another baby very badly. We don't even have the room in our house for another. ANd financially it is not a great idea. We have my husbands two kids living with us also. They make things very difficult for me. I would say go for it. I have had this feeling for 3 years and I am miserable. I don't want you to feel that way to. Good luck sweety.

Any decision you make is going to be the right one :) That being said, it sounds like your family has been going through alot of changes recently, and wanting a baby could very well be a reaction to that. Also, having that 2 yr old "grow up," is definitely a biggie (you will feel those "pangs" of wanting another when she starts Kindergarten, too). When my youngest started school 2 yrs ago, I got the "baby bug." What actually decided it for me was my husband's (now ex-husband) age. Did I really want a situation where he was attending the youngest child's high school graduation the same year he was retiring? Another factor for me was the age spread between all the kids. I already had 1 start college the same year 1 started Kindergarten . . .

My opinion? Wait 6 months and then see how you feel. Good luck no matter what you decide :)

I felt the same way several years ago and I got a puppy and tending to her sure helped those nuturing feelings I was having. As a matter of fact I just go another pup last fall. It seems to work every time I feel like I'd like to have a baby. Lots cheaper too!

Good Luck...S.

Hello J.,

I don't think you are crazy. I think it's a natural urge in some women to want a baby and have more than one. When I had my daughter, I didn't have the urge to have another one until now. It's a small urge as she's not potty trained yet, but I kind of bat it down because I know I can't afford another child and I'm a single mom.

I would see how your husband feels about having another child? If he's up for it, then I say go for it!

Angie

Hi J.,

First of all, I think the majority of parents feel the same way after the second child. I thought we were done after number two. But then, they grow up so fast. It was a very, very hard decision to make, but we decided to stop at two.

I wish you the best of luck!

I am 63 years old. Years ago I had number three. They are all grown up now, the most amazing adults! Didn't want more after that since my ex-husband was nasty. Divorced, remarried, adopted sibling boy & girl at age 53. I still long to hold a baby... the sweetness of a baby is so precious. Now I hold other people's babies. Although I entered menopause at age 58, I still wanted to love a baby. Adoption is great, somebody else has the pregnancy, no difficult pregnancy for you. Whatever you decide, the baby will probably be the special child that all children deserve to be.

J. - maybe you should try to do daycare for an infant to get your baby fix in, but instead of costing you money, it will be income. And you don't have to go through the sick phase.
I used to want a dozen kids but ended up with two. Although there are times when I wish I had another, there are plenty of times I am very glad I don't. I have friends with three and they way they have to juggle their schedules makes my head spin (all kids are active in sports). There are good reasons to have more, and reasons not too. What does your husband think?

Hi J.,
I would wait to have another, the "feeling" might pass, if it doesn't your youngest would be at that cute age to get a puppy, get one that stays little so that you can cuddle with him/her!! It worked for me, it's like having an infant all over again, alot of work!!

Good luck;)

We went back and forth on this too. We have two boys, ages 6.5 and 3. We couldnt decide if we wanted #3 or not. Neither of us wanted to go through pregnancy again.... and in the end, we both realized that adoption was in our hearts. We are currently waiting for a referral in an international adoption. :)

Whatever choice you make will be the right one for you, but make sure you and your husband talk it out... you never know where it will lead.

I totally can relate. My husband is 37 and feels old and I'm 31. We agreed on two kids but after our first was born we agreed on having three kids. After having the second I said that I thought I was done. That was on our car ride home from the hospital with hormones out of wack from just having a baby! He agreed to have three kids back in the day to shut me up. Nice. Anyway, I have a two year old and an itch to have another or two but that would be pushing it. He says it'll be too expensive to have another child and I guess it would add an expense. I lost my job last May and have been staying home and will continue doing so until the youngest is in FT school. He asks me what another would add to our lives. What would a kid add that our two don't? That's a good question but not one I think should base on whether or not to have another so I'm not pleased and pretty peed off but he doesn't get it.

I think it would be bad timing for you because starting up a business is stressful and losing a job is stressful and with the uncertainty of the economy is stressful. I'd wait it out a year.

J.

no it is no crazy. just talk it over with your hubby and maybe he might agree. there is a medication for morning sickness, I can't remember what it is but i've on it with my oldest. It works wonders..

it could be that your 2 year old is growing up but if you can't shake the feeling about having another baby then talk about it. I love having kids and i'm not going to stop for a couple more years, but i love being pregnant but i can't have any more for myself right now, i'm now trying to help another couple have a baby because they can't//

best wishes to you and your family

I would try to picture life 5, 10, 20 years down the road. Visualize life with an additional child, and then life just with the children you have now. I would say that 9 months of pregnancy is a small price to pay, when you look at things long-term.

That being said, if you have a baby today, while you're trying to start up your own business, odds are good that either the business or your home life will suffer (or both!).

Can the business wait a year? Can a baby?

Good luck, whatever you decide.

I'm 7 months pregnant with my third and was hoping to be done after this, but the further along I get, the more I feel there's another one that needs to join our family. Who wants to think about that while still pregnant with complications?!?
Personally, I think if it's a strong feeling that you can't get off your mind, you should probably seriously consider it. I'm sure you cannot imagine living without the 2 children you already have, and that's how it would be with another. Sure, it'll be more work and you'll have to go through another 9 months of feeling sick and fat, but will the end result be worth it? For me, it totally is.
Remember, no pregnancy is the same, and every child is precious. If you are physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially able to care for a third child AND YOU WANT TO, go for it!

I would not, but I know I would not like to have another. It sounds like you have a wonderful family and you seem to be happy. If you are going to start a business why would you want to get pregnant? You may have a chance to spend a little more time with the ones you have until you decide if you need to get to work. Have you been a stay at home mom before? In my opinion, it sounds like you are going to be in a better financial situation with the 2 step children being out of the financial picture, I would take this oppertunity to enjoy the two you have and stay at home with them! When I think I want another child I hold someone else's baby and spend more time with the ones I already have.

It does sound like a lot, but I don't think you are crazy. I really think you will KNOW when you done, and if you have to ask, you must not be. But definetly talk it over with the hubby. It must be a joint decision!

And FYI, pry 90% of pregnancies happen even though it isn't "financially smart". The population would dwindle if we all waited till we had money. I still have yet to hear someone say the regretted having another child. Good luck to you and Best wishes!!!

I really don't think this is a matter to be decided by what one "wants" but rather should be carefully thought out by both you and your husband.