Time-outs???

I think that time-outs can be introduced starting at 18 months. I have a 3 year old son and I think that age 1 1/2 has by far been the most difficult age. You only have to put her in her bed or on a designated chair or something for 2 minutes. She may not necessarily understand the whole reasoning and logic for the time outs, but she will start to associate whatever she's doing wrong with being separated from you and she will not like that. We are to the point now that we say we're going to count to 3 and by the time we get to 1, he shapes up. So that's proof that the time outs really do work.

Good luck.

A big part of parenting is learning about which of your daughter's behaviors are age/stage appropriate - because it's really useless (even counter-productive) to do time-outs or punishments for behaviors that are just normal for their age (and which they'll outgrow in a few short months). Most discipline for such a young toddler will consist of techniques like redirecting her behavior, making sure she's getting enough exercise (they have *so* much energy), making sure her physical environment is appropriate (for example, it'd likely be asking for trouble to take her to a really nice restaurant at 8:30pm and expect her to sit quietly for a 3-hr meal), substitution/distraction, lots of physical guidance, appropriate (not extreme, just appropriate to their age and their personality) childproofing, etc.

For starting time outs with a 1 1/2 yr old, check out:
10 TIME-OUT TECHNIQUES
http://askdrsears.com/html/6/T061900.asp

While time-outs work for some families, other parents & kids find that time outs work at first but eventually become ineffective, so there are other tools available for setting limits and disciplining your daughter. It really depends on your personality and your daughter's personality whether time-outs would be an effective parenting tool. I highly encourage you to read these quick tips:

8 TOOLS FOR TODDLER DISCIPLINE
http://askdrsears.com/html/6/T060500.asp

9 DEVELOPMENTAL REASONS WHY TODDLERS CAN BE DIFFICULT TO DISCIPLINE http://askdrsears.com/html/6/T060400.asp

And there are some other really wonderful discipline resources available - some are books you can get out of your local library, others are online resources:

BECOMING THE PARENT YOU WANT TO BE: A Sourcebook of Strategies for the First Five Years (by Laura Davis,Janis Keyser)
http://www.becomingtheparent.com/all/subsection12.html

Connection Parenting: Parenting Through Connection Instead of Coercion, Through Love Instead of Fear (by Pam Leo)

Parenting from the Heart: Sharing the Gifts of Compassion, Connection, and Choice (by Inbal Kashtan)

Discipline & Behavior
http://askdrsears.com/html/6/T060100.asp

Positive Discipline parenting classes and coaching (via phone or via online chat)
http://www.howtoparent.net

Non Violent Communication w/ Children
http://www.cnvc.org/motherin.htm
http://www.cnvc.org/grabbing.htm

You will find your way with disciplining your daughter - most of all, don't be afraid to try a variety of approaches. Don't get hung up on using time-outs just because they're popular. Each child is different, as is each parent - find which approaches work best for you, your child, your family (and that could well be time outs, or even a combination of time out & other parenting strategies, or something entirely different).

Congratulations on the birth of your daughter who has so quickly grown into a toddler! What a wonderful age - it can certainly be an intense time, but this age is so adorable... :) Enjoy every moment!

My daughter is 2, and we don't have actual "time-outs". Instead, when she is acting her age I try to stop what I'm doing and give her two choices. When she throws a fit for something, or doesn't listen, I give her two choices - Would you like to read a book with mommy or color with mommy? This diverts her attention and allows her to make a choice, and both activities are quiet ones that help her calm down. After we read a book or color a page or two, she's much happier and almost always forgets what she was upset about before! :) Yes, I do have to stop whatever it is I'm doing - but there will be a time when your children don't want to read or color with you - so it's totally worth it! :) Dishes can wait!

I have heard that timeouts should not be longer than their age - so if you do use timeouts, which is fine, no more than 2 minutes for a 2 year old - and you should have a designated time out spot.

I would agree that now would be just fine to start time outs. We started them with our daughter around that age and she did just fine, I would have her sit on the bottom stair and I would set the timer, she learned that when the timer went off that she was able to get up and come to mommy so that we could talk about why she was in time out. I have to disagree with giving them a choice of what to do when they are acting up. To correct a behavior with a one on one activity with mommy doesn't teach them that the behavior was bad, it teaches them that when the act out they get to do something "special" with mommy. I don't make a huge deal out of time outs, I put the girls in time out (if they need it), they sit there for their time, come out, I tell them why they were in time out, give suggestions of what to do instead of the "bad" behavior, and then send them on their way, and don't bring it up again. Then entire process takes about 5 minutes with my oldest (she is 3). Good luck.

I'd say she's old enough. The girls are right 1 minute for each year of their age.

S.

That was the age that I pseudo started my daughter on time-outs. It happened during Christmas while my husband and I were trying to bring in the Christmas tree. She would not stay out of the way, kept getting under foot so I finally sat her in a chair and told her not to move. She thought it was a game but I would just put her back everytime she got up. Usually you would only keep them in the chair one minute per year old that the child is, but we were trying to keep her safe while we were getting the tree in the door. She probably sat there about ten mintes. She seemed to understand what I was doing. Good Luck.

A one and half minute time out would be ok for her. Time outs should be one minute for every year old. One year olds get one minute time out, two year olds get two minute time outs and so on. They say if you go less than that they don't realize they were in trouble and if you go more than that they forget why they even sat there to begin with or it's just a waste of time. The goal of any punishment is to make sure that they realize that what they did was not a good thing to do. For each child different punishments work. Good luck!

we also started using timeouts about the same age for our son. the funny thing is that when we started the "naughty chair" was in a corner of our family room where he could not see TV. But when we put up our Christmas Tree, we re-arranged and didn't put it back. So now, his naughty chair faces the tv...real punishment, huh? He's only 2 so he still gets the idea. I will however have to move it soon!

I say the sooner the better but only put them in the corner or on the couch or on a carpet square like Nanny 911 does, for their age (1 minute for 1 year old, 2 minutes for 2 years, etc.) I babysit and have had really good luck with the kids that have been introduced to time out early. Also, make sure when time out is up (I set a timer so they can hear it go off) that you ask them if they understand why they were put in time out and if they don't, then explain it to them. It might seem kind of "Brady Bunch" but if it works, it works! Good luck

Hi H. H:

I'm a Mom of 5 kids ages 1 - 9...

Heck yeah! Nows the time. I hear a time-out one minute for each birthday....so she has to do 1.5 minutes:)

My 1-year old is a master of destruction. He goes in the play pen each time he's naughty. I don't have a clue if he knows why he's there yet...but it sure makes me feel better:)

Good Luck

J. G

I agree with the time out and you get the time by the age but I would take it one stepfurther. Even though she is young after the time out is over get down to eye level and explain to her why she had to be in time out of course make it simple and to the point such,as you can not throw things you could break something or hurt someone. Let the child know that you still love them and you go on with your day. Even at that age they do understand simple instructions and disipline. I started doing that with my now 3 year old when he was about the same age as yur daughter and it works wonders he now really doesn't end up getting time outs becasue when I tell him something he listens he doesn't want to spend three minutes on the step(I call it the naughty step)you need to find a quiet place away from toys and everything for her to have time outs. Good luck and stick with what ever you decide to do

I started with time-out's at just 13 months. It get my daughter's attention more than anything. Some tips (from Supernanny) are to have a certain place in the house and always put your child in that place, explain to them why they were in time-out after their time out is over, and it is supposed to be 1 minute for each year of age. My daughter is 15 months, so she sits in time-out for 1 minute and 15 seconds. It works like a charm for me, it was a little hard at first b/c she didn't understand that she was supposed to stay there until I went and got her, but after just a few time out's, she figured it out and she dosn't try to get up anymore. I hope it this advice helps. GOOD LUCK!!!!

Hi H., I also have an 18 month old daughter who is very energetic and has a hard time listening. I have just started using time out with her and it is really starting to work. My sons did not need time-outs this early, but there must be something about girls! For her I use a timer, and I was always told by my mom that it's a minute for your age (18 mo would be 1 1/2 minutes, 2 yrs would be 2 minutes etc.) and I sit her on the bottom step of our stairs so she can see the rest of us playing but she has no access to toys and can't see the TV. The main things to remember with time out is to use a firm voice when you put her in to tell her why she is going, then WALK AWAY. Don't talk to her, don't look at her, nothing. A time out is supposed to be an absence of your attention. If she gets up go pick her up and put her back without saying anything. When the timer goes off tell her to come to you then reinforce what you said when you put her in time out and ask her to say sorry if applicable (like if she was hitting or took a toy). Then give hugs and move on. The other thing about time outs is to address the bad behavior but also to reinforce good. After a time out if she is playing nicely (it usually lasts at least a couple of minutes) tell her that you think she is being so nice and how you love it when she is a good friend, etc. I hope this helps!!! Good luck!