Three Year Old Sleepless nights...nightmares

I have a daughter that is three as well but when she was a little younger she would do the same and I was freaked out about it, so I took her to the doctor and he told me she was having night terrors. There really isn't anything you can do but comfort her she will grow out of it in time.

Sounds like she needs a little bit more vitamin B. Thats what fixes things when my kids start having nightmares or not sleeping well. You might consider switching her chewable vitamins to Solray kids chewables. You can find them at Whole foods. I swear by them.

Yes, I just went through this. It is so hard. My daughter actually would scream and sleep walk screaming and run in the corner and try to hide. In her case they were not nightmares, they were NIGHT TERRORS. They are very scary and are to be handled differently. I "googled" night terrors and learned so very much! They are not awake and should not be bothered. They so not remember night terrors. And they seem totally awake at times. You will be relieved to read about this.

I solved the emotional issue of taking her water bottle away and returned it for she was not ready. And made sure she got more sleep and now they are gone! Hooray!

I hope this is helpful. I am a 46 year old single mom.

hello R.,

I also have tree y.o girl. she had some of the same problemm in the night. She was scared sometimes and whining. We found out it was because of the programm she watched. the only programm she watched is in the morning Kids programm on pbs. But there are some that talk a lot about the monsters and scary things. now she watched only the programm we choose for her. She doesn't waking up anymore, and has always good sleep. We also read a Todlers Bible and pray before, she loves it, it makes her happy.

Also, can it be becouse of new baby in the house?? When it started before or after her brother was born?? My girl is almost 3 (next week) and in july we will have a baby boy, so I also think often how will she react.

I hope you will find a way to help your little one to get good sleep and for you too.

all the best,
N.

You could try using Rescue Remedy. It is for calming, and I have heard that it has helped several children with night terrors. You can get it in drop or spray form at your local health food store. I got the little spray bottle and it was around $17. You do not wake the child, you simply spray into their mouth and it should calm them.

Good luck!

T. Solar
Founder
www.theparentpack.org

Sure sounds like Night Terrors to me! My daughter had them big time, right at that age too. I would research this phenonmenon in childrearing/pediatric literature online and in any texts you may have. They are actually not that big of a deal. There are tips on how to deal with them and even maybe prevent them. They are not regular dreams or nightmares, they are a nervous system issue i think. One main thing, the child does not remember any of it the next morning. And, even if they look at you with open eyes when moaning or screaming, they are not awake! Thats why you can't consold them. It is very much like sleep walking actually. There is an answer and conforting advice out there! S.

R.,
I know it's hard when your child is having those kinds of nightmares, I heard of this company that helps kids with nightmares. It seems to work. www.StopBadDreams.com I hope it helps.

Sounds like night terrors. Our son experienced these for about a year off and on and it started at the age of 2. Check out this website. http://www.nightterrors.org/

There are many websites that discuss this problem. One website somewhere said to put your child's feet in water to help wake/calm them. That's what we found worked most often.

Best of luck.

Hi R.,
If she isn't waking up then I would just leave her alone. It sounds like it bothers you more than it bothers her and going in to comfort her is disrupting her sleep more than her moaning and whimpering. My daughter makes all kinds of noises at night, sometimes even sitting up with a cry before laying back down to sleep. The only time I respond is if she is sitting up crying for a few minutes. I have a video monitor so I can check on her without going in and disturbing her. Just make sure she is going to bed early and getting plenty of rest. If you are interested in learning about the natural biological sleep rhythms in children I recommend you read Dr. Weissbluth's book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." It talks a little bit about dreams and night terrors, which I don't think is your daughters problem. What your daughter is experiencing is completely normal, leave her alone unless she is really crying and she will be fine. You are a good mom to be worried about her though. :)
Sincerely,
L.

Hi
1. Homeopathic remedies are very good for children and for sleep and emotional difficulties.
2. Also, I had a July (Cancer sign) child and it is hard for them to verbalize their feelings. When my young son could not explain a feeling to me but was obviously hurting inside, i would hand him a marker or crayon and pad of paper and ask him to draw his feeling or what might have happened. He wasn't the "artist" my older son was, but just the process of scribbling something would release his feelings and he would be able to start talking.
3. Consider that something bad might be happening in real life (like inappropriate touching by a relative or friend) and that she had been told something bad would happen if she "told". Do some snooping around but also keep reassuring her that you can always protect her no matter what anyone says. there is a good book called My Body for 3-5 year olds at www.parentingpress.com

Good Luck....J. (children now 33 and 36)

Hi R.!

I'm so sorry to hear about your daughter's Nightmare's. I'm confused about something.....is she 1/2 asleep when she has the Nightmare's? Maybe she's actually asleep, but has her eyes open to make it look like she's awake? Does this happen nearly at the same time each night? It could be Night Terrors if you answered YES to any of these questions. If you think it could be Night Terrors, these are very different from Nightmares and need to be treated differently.

Please let me know if you would like more info on Night Terror's. I've dealt with them for my son (when he was 2-3) for about 1 1/2 years. It is VERY sad and exhausting, but it's very real, and there are ways to help....

Let me know if you need more info

:o) N.

Hi. My son experience these as well. They are called night terrors. Night terrors are not the same as nightmares. A child who has a night terror is in a very deep sleep pattern, unlike a child who has a nightmare during rapid eye movement (REM) sleep. Night terrors are periods of hysterical crying, screaming and non-responsiveness. The child will eventually calm down but not remember the event at all.

Night terrors should only last a couple of minutes. It is best to not talk to or wake the child, just make sure they are safe-not getting out of bed or falling out of bed or thrashing and hurting themselves. I would sit and watch my son and he would work through it and calm down. And sure enough come morning he would have no clue at all to the evenings events.

I found he usually had terrors when he was working through something in his daily life or had a rough day-like lots of seperation crying at school. Even now at 5.5 he has them every now again. I find if I repeat softly "you are safe" he seems to calm. But realize your child is not awake at all, totally in a deep sleep.

Hope this helps.

Dear R.: Let me start by saying how sorry I am to hear about your little girl's sleep problems. I'm not sure how much I'll be able to help but I hope I can at least give you a little comfort. When my son was about 2 1/2 he started having what I thought were nightmares. He would start whimpering, moaning and mumbling in his sleep. I would go to him and try to comfort him but it only seemed to make things worse. I would talk to him and turn on a small light and tell him I was there. He would open his eyes and start to get even more upset. It seemed like he didn'n even see me. I finally talked to his pediatrician about it and she explained that it sounded more like night terrors and not nightmares. She said not worry that he would outgrow it. Long story short, he did. It was a tough time but he did outgrow it. By the time he was 4 it was all over. Just hang in there honey and it'll get better. Before you know it, this will be a thing of the past.

P.S. He's 18 now and just fine!

It sounds like night terrors. My son experienced them also, the hardest part is that trying to comfort them makes it worse. They are still asleep even if their eyes are open and they are talking. I would talk to your doctor and look on the web for suggestions. In my experience there wasn't anything I could do to help, just be close by to comfort if he asked for me. It lasted about a month and then it stopped and we haven't had it again and it's been almost a year. I wish I could give you some advice to help now, just hang in there and try to get some sleep when you can. Good luck!
J.

My now 4 year old does the same thing. She seems to not be fully awake when this happens. It seems also to happen when she falls asleep somewhere other than her bed and wakes up later not knowing where she is. It happens without that too though. Sometimes she has to go to the bathroom and I'll carry her to the bathrooom in her half asleep state and she'll calm down. However, there have been times when she takes a really long time to get calmed down from them. I've even had to get into the shower with her to try to calm her down. My son is 14 and he used to wake up and sleep walk and I think what she does is similiar. Neither him nor my daughter remember the next morning. My sister lives across the street and my son slept walked over to her house one night and my sister found him in her home office just sitting there with the lights out at midnight. He hasn't slept walked like that in over 2 years now. We try to be consistent in having them go to sleep and we make sure our 4 year old uses the restroom before bed and doesn't drink too much right before bed. I feel like I'm maybe going off on a tangent with my answer, but I guess I'm trying to say that making sure the routine before going to sleep is consistent is helpful. My son is extremely intelligent (he's in middle school and goes to the high school for his math class and is top of the math class), he also plays football and is in the debate club and is an overall great kid. My daughter is extremely bright for her age too. Sometimes I think maybe their minds are just very active during sleep.
I think reading other parents advice on this subject is helpful, thanks for putting the subject up on the bored.

My fourth daughter did the same thing. I know it sounds funny, but when she would cry or yell, I figured out it was because she had to go to the bathroom. I'm not sure if she just couldn't wake all the way up or what. It was quite frightening not knowing what I could do to help her. After doing everything else I could think of, I tried setting her on the toilet. Lets just say she had to go really bad. I started doing that every time, then she was getting up on her own to go potty. I don't know if this is the same for your child but maybe something to try. Good luck!!

I had this problem when my daughter was 10. There was nothing I could do to comfort her and it was almost like she was asleep. I was terrified that maybe someone had molested her or something. It was night terrors. I took her to a child psychologist and she was able to talk to him. It was just her stressing herself out because she expects too much of herself and she was working on her science project. Kids are sometimes more willing to talk to someone else even at 3 especially if someone has hurt them because they asre often threatened that their mom will be hurt if they tell them.

Yes,
happens to my 3.5 year old boy. I think they are just in a sensitive age in general. But we have cut down on his TV watching (or actually videos, we don't have TV). No scary stuff, like Sword in the stone or Pocahontas, just Sesame street etc. He seems to sleep better now. Don't know if that has to do with it, but it was the only thing I could think of. In your case, don't underestimate the impact of a new little brother. My son slept really bad when his sister was newborn. It is a lot going on, and it can be tough for the whole family. It will pass though. Hang in there.

I have read that children that have these night time sleep terrors or disturbances are sometimes having past life related dreams. I have researched it some because of some things our son told us seemingly about a past life.

I know this sounds 'out there' and if I was you reading this 3 yrs ago, I'd think the person writing it was bonkers. If you want more info google Carol Bowman Childrens Past Lives. There is a forum and you can search 'night terrors' within the forum.

This sounds very similiar to what my DD does when she is sleeping too deep to wake up and go to the bathroom. Taking her potty always calms her down and she'll go right back to sleep. Before I figured this out the crying would escalate, she would scream and thrash around, it was very sad and a little scary. Once she went potty in my lap during and episode and calmed right down, after this I took her potty when this happend and it always helps. Good luck. :)

Hi R.-
Your daught sounds like she might be having night terrors. My 2 year old daughter has had them and it is terrifying for me to watch - I feel totally helpless. Only after she had a few of them did I learn that the best thing to do when she is having one is to leave her alone and make sure she is safe and doesn't hurt herself on anything. What I have learned has all been from googling night terrors on the internet. There is a lot of info out there. I hope that you are able to find out what is going on with her and that she begins to sleep better.
Take care-
L. :-)

Hi there R....are you in the process of potty training? Or perhaps using pullups or diapers at night? My daughter woke like this and had almost the exact same emotions and melt downs..until I thought that maybe she was needing the use the potty and not wanting to go in her diaper. That night we jumped up and put her on the potty as soon as she started that night. She went right back to sleep and the problem has been remedied. Could this be resltless legs (cramps) from an active day? Just some thoughts...good luck! Steph

Hi R.

My oldest is 12 years old and the youngest is 2 yrs. When my oldest was around 3 she had the nightmares and would scream and cry but she was still asleep. The best thing you can do is talk calm to her and DO NOT touch her until she is fully aawake. I know you want to comfort her but that will make it worse. When she is fully awake she does not know what she dreamed about. Hang in there it is just a part of them going up.

But always talk calm to her when she is in the dream and she will come out of it if you do not touch her faster.

J. V

My son goes through the same thing if he doesn't take a nap or is just extremely tired. It is called "Confusional Arousal" which just means that they are woken up in the first stages of sleep (usually within the first four hours or so) and can only calm themselves down. You can look it up on the internet and see if she has any of the symptoms. I will go in and sit with him while he cries and moves around. Usually lasts about 5 to 10 minutes. If I do try to touch him it makes it worse. I know it is hard but the best thing to do right now is just sit in there with her and quietly let her know you are there. Also make sure she is taking naps during the day. That's what has helped my little boy sleep peacefully through the night.

R.,

It sounds like your daughter is experiencing night terrors rather than nightmares. We went through the same thing with our daughter. Unfortunately, the best way to handle night terrors is to just let them run their course (yes, I know, hard for a parent to just sit & watch). When you attempt to wake, comfort or talk to your daughter you are likely prolonging the episode. Stay by her side to make sure she does not get hurt & let it happen. Typically, they will only last 10-20 minutes (sometimes longer) then stop. The one positive is that your child does not remember a night terror episode (unlike a nightmare where they do remember the bad dream, feeling scared). They are harder on the parents than the child. Hang in there, you'll get through it!

R., I am not a child anymore (at 43) but I know that all the females in my family - my cousin and her daughter (6), me, my mom, my aunt, my grandmother, and on back, all moan in our sleep. I really scared my husband until he got used to it.

It may just be the way her brain is processing things, and she really *isn't* scared, or hurt, or anything else.

R.,
I am a mom in the same position. I just posted a request a few minutes ago and thought that I was the only one having this issue. I am taking her to see her doctor today to make sure nothing more serious is going on.
Since you posted this last month, I was wondering if you were able to get some clarification as to why this would be happening. If you have gotten response, will you please let me know? I am desperately seeking answers and guidance.
Thank you,
R. W.