Teaching a Boy to Jump and Trust Himself:

If it makes you feel any better, I wouldn't of even asked my sons if they felt save or told them that I trusted them. I would of just told them to jump.

Kids fall. Kids get bumps and scrapes and even broken bones. It's a part of growing up.

I'm not sure why you feel terrible?
When I was growing up, we'd be playing outside all day every day, riding bikes, climbing trees - and if we fell and got scraped up, we'd go home, wash up, pick the gravel out of the scrape, bandage up - and head right back outside again to go do the same thing some more.
Mom never had to say a word - the scrapes themselves were great teachers of our limits.

i'm not sure what the problem is.
i wouldn't have been involved in the first place. if my kids wanted to try a higher jump, they'd try it without checking with me. they were very used to navigating their world with me as back-up, not needing to ask my permission before every new adventure.
but if they had, i'd probably have said pretty much what you did.
but i don't get all the guilt and feeling terrible. is your son permanently scarred? is his psyche shattered because he got a scrape? is his trust in your judgment and his own damaged beyond repair?
if so, his mental fragility is the problem, not the scrape.
but i'll bet it's not. you trusted him. he trusted himself. that trust was borne out. he jumped, he got a scrape, scrapes are part of childhood. the most important thing is that he learned something, and now he has an important tool to use to gauge future decisions. he wasn't wrong to jump. he didn't break his back or his nose or his brain. he got a scrape. maybe he'll be more cautious in the future if he's a cautious fellow, or maybe he'll think a little longer on how to land if he's a planner, or have a bigger kid teach him how to roll on landing if he's really a smart guy.
telling him not to do things would be a poor parenting tactic, wouldn't it?
khairete
S.

My kids would have jumped without ever asking me so don't feel bad. Isn't that part of being seven?
I suppose if I saw my kids do something I knew they would definitely hurt themselves doing, I'd say "nope" and that means no, but I think kids generally know what they can handle. If not, I'd say it's a learning experience. You don't want them to be timid but at the same time, obviously they might get a few bruises.
Don't beat yourself up. If you knew it was dangerous, you would have stopped him. Trust your mommy instinct :)

ETA and we all screw up sometimes. I've had my kids pissed off at me when I told them of course you can handle the bike and they fell off. They don't hold it against you. Generally we get it right, but sometimes we don't know how things will turn out. We're parents, not perfect :) Everyone of us has been there

I think you did exactly what you were supposed to do to teach him how to jump and trust himself. He jumped, he fell, he knew you weren't mad at him, he knew you were close by if he was really hurt and he probably was okay shortly after the fall…sounds like it all went ok! My kids do this stuff all the time. My son literally falls at least 5 times/day doing something. Sometimes it's routine, sometimes it's daredevilish. They have to learn the natural consequences for jumping, falling, and everything else.

I think kids fall and hurt themselves all the time and you shouldn't feel guilty about it.

don't feel guilty. falling is a part of life. your son needs to learn that. he also needs to learn by doing. if he didn't try then he would be wondering if he really could of made the jump and landed on his feet.

you didn't force him to jump, you just encouraged him to be independent and trust himself. which is a good thing.

Kids fall and get hurt. It helps them learn that they can try new things and if they fail its ok. You did well letting him push his limits. Make sure he knows how proud you are that he's not afraid to try things.

Playgrounds are for the express purpose of letting kids build their own security, coordination and strength. My son is 7 and I haven't monitored his playground play past "Is he still here somewhere?" for years. No, you should not be more protective. Falling is part of life. My six year old daughter just broke open her chin on some monkey bars at school and needed stitches. She's been playing on those bars since she was in kindergarten. Stuff happens.

Your best bet is to teach him how to fall safely, how to assess *where* to jump (is there something softer underneath like bark chips, or is it hard ground-- assessing potential for injury) etc.

We all fall on our face from time to time. :) Just get back up and try it a different way....

Heh. My older son has always been a jumper, which is odd because he's also nervous about heights. It used to provoke so much anxiety in me that I had to make a conscious effort to not interfere and pretend like my heart isn't thumping.

I learned to back off and just tell him to not break anything because I don't want to take him to the ER. Gets a scrape? "Way to stick the landing, kid. *eyeroll* Let's wash the dirt out."

Kids are going to fall...it happens...

I have both my kids in martial arts that specifically teach how to fall without injuring yourself. And it has kept us out of the ER on two occasions they took a nasty spills and got right back up with only a scrape or two.

Then my son is running in the house (broken house rule one), trips over his own shoes (broken house rule two) and breaks his elbow. The speed he was going plus the angle he fell it was impossible to fall safely.

If you want him to learn to fall as safely as possible put him in an activity that teaches safe falling techniques.

Also, he is seven...let him go play at the park and sit back and read a book or use a tablet. Check on him over the top every few minutes. Let him figure it out...he can do it on his own. Or with his friends help. If he falls that is just life...carry some spray neosporin and band aids.

I know these days it is so hard let our kids go and figure it out. But you have to...cause if he is in school they play outside on the playground everyday (I hope!!)

No mama guilt for you!! And let go a bit!! Big hugs!!

oh honey, I would have said, HECK YEAH GO FOR IT BIG GUY! lol. And then comforted and cuddled him while he cried.

you stop feeling guilty right now. he is seven not two. :)

when my son was 4 he was playing next door and the little girl jumped off the top of the swingset so he thought he should too. his foot caught and he landed flat on his face with his arm underneath him - first broken bone at four years old. think "I" felt guilty! Heck yeah!

but you could not have prevented this. kids fall, it's what they do. Please be kinder to yourself. I bet he's already over it.