First and foremost please understand... I am NOT in any way considering suicide.
I understand that suicide is a very touchy and unspeakable subject and that is why I am posting.
I'm 29yrs old and a suicide survivor. Two years ago I lost my older sister to suicide. She was a wonderful mother of a beautiful 3 yr old daughter.
Tonight I've learned that another family (whom I have no ties to at all) has lost a member to suicide. She has two young children. She was a mother, a wife, a daughter, and possibly a sister. And for whatever personal reason, she could not continue to go on. This grieves me terribly.
Please, If ANY of you or anyone you know has ever considered suicide or is concidering suicide, this is my feable attempt to help you find a beacon of light in your darkest of days. I understand your grief, your pain, and your loss of hope. And even though times may be at their darkest- though your days are filled with sorrow, SOMEONE CARES FOR YOU. SOMEONE NEEDS YOU. SOMEONE WANTS YOU. SOMEONE LOVES YOU. You must understand that suicide doesn't end with you. YOUR GRIEF does NOT die with you. It continues on in everyone you leave behind, forever.
You may feel that life for those around you would be better if you were to just disappear. Just walk away. That you wouldn't be missed or that you family would someday move past your death. But this is not the case. My sister left behind, not only her siblings, parents, and friends - but a daughter who now cries herself to sleep every night since her mommy died two years ago. She cries, because her memories are fading, she cries becuase when she leaves her home to go on with her days she sees other children with their mommies there to comfort them when they get hurt, or be silly and play with. She cries, because even though daddies, grandparents, aunts and uncles are great... they can never comfort, hug, kiss, play, and love like a mommy loves her children (Even on YOUR bad days). You can NOT be replaced. Whether your children are babies or full grown. You can NEVER be replaced!
So Please, if you feel suicidal. If you know someone who is suicidal find help. GET HELP! Go to your doctor, your spouse, your family and friends, ANYONE WHO WILL LISTEN AND GET YOU THE HELP YOU NEED! If doctors pass you by, go to another, and another, and another til one listens and gets you the kind of help YOU need and feel YOU need. If ever its not right or enough or Good enough... Keep Going! If nothing else call me. I know where you are, I know how you feel. And I know what its like to lose a loved one to suicide.
YOU ARE LOVED. YOU MATTER. YOU ARE PRECIOUS AND IRRIPLACEABLE.
There is light. There is hope. You just need help finding it. Let someone help you.
Thank you for your time, and please say a heartfelt prayer for those who feel lost and alone to find comfort and hope, and for the families who have lost their mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, daughters, and sons to suicide. May we some day be able to find peace.
I am so very sorry to hear of the loss of your sister and your latest family memeber. My heart goes out to you. Thank you though for your message of strength and compassion to others while you are grieving.
L.
Thank you so much for sharing.It is sometimes from our deepest sadness are we able to help others. I know when I lost my 3rd daughter I considered suicide. I thought the pain of the grief was more than I could handle. i had 2 beautiful daughters and a wonderful husband and a lot of other people who loved me. When I mentioned my thoughts to a friend she said something I will never forget. "I know something terrible has happened to you but that does not give you the right to hurt other people" At that moment I thought of all those I loved mostly my little girls. I also know the the incidence of suicide is so much greater in people who have lost parents to suicide. I did not want that pain for my chhildren. Thanks God I did not do it. God blessed me with a a beautiful baby boy 2 years later. He did not replace my daughter but he he made me too busy to think about anything else.
Thanks you again for mentioning the unmentionable, you may have saved someones life today. I repeat your advice if you are reading this and thinking of ending your life please talk to someone and keep talking until somone listens. YOur life is so worht living even if it does not feel like it now. If you are a mom no one can love your children like you can.
God bless all of you out there,
J.
That was beautiful, I cried. I am not suicidal but have experienced the loss. My sister, my Maid of Honor, came into town for the first time in many years for my wedding. Her first boyfriend, the love of her life, was at our wedding too. He was going through a nasty divorce, & they certainly became a couple again. But they lived 1000 miles apart. Anyway on Valentines Day, my very upset sister called & said he had hung himself. He was so depressed & never asked for help. He left 3 children, I think they were 2, 6, & 8. So now they have to go through life knowing that Daddy did not love them enough to stick around. If you have children, don't you think that would go through their minds? I ran into his mother about a year after. She was so pitiful. Her husband died of cancer a month after Dave comitted suicide. The point is, PLEASE GET HELP! You may exit this earth by choice but you will hurt so many people that LOVE & NEED you! Thanks for listening! It has been almost three years & I still cry over Dave's death, so does my sister & my Mom & we're not even related to him. I hate to imagine how his children & Mom are feeling.
I have gone through the dark times you are referring to myself when I was in my late teens and thank God I came through them because now I have a beautiful daughter and a wonderful husband. We do have our stresses to deal with but I would much rather deal with them then to never have experienced the joy of having a wonderful family. Your message brought tears to my eyes and a prayer for all those going through dark times right now.
Hello C.,
First of all, I want to say I am truley sorry for your loss. I have never experienced anything like that and couldn't imagine how I would take it.
Second of all, I have to say "Thank You" because you are right nobody talks about things like that and sometimes it takes just one person to have the courage to talk about it. You have probably helped many people to deal with things or to even seek some help. people will realize that they are NOT alone. I just wanted to let you know that I think what you did was commendable!
L.
