Stopping Grandma from Dressing up Baby on Special Occasions

I would tell her that I bought "special outfits" in advance before she buys hers to try and beat her to the punch. If she still bought one, tell her that you are going to dress her in the one you bought, but that you will take a picture of her in the outfit she bought so that she can still see it on her. Maybe you can make a scrapbook of the baby in all of the outfits she buys so she has something to remember them by. Good luck.

Just have a conversation with her--if she is goijng to do it, tell her she will be in charge of it for every holiday, so you guys don;t spend money then, too. Enjoy it--let her spend the money! And I am sure she is picking out adorable stuff. I have a stepmother-in-law who goes nuts on my daughter like that, and I have come around to enjoying it for what it is--a grandparent's excitement over a grandchild--let her spoil her, and you spend your money on the practical, every day stuff she needs.

I understand how you feel and you are right! My Mom used to always buy my daughter the toy she wanted most for Christmas and I felt deprived of that opportunity!
If this is the worst thing your Mom ever does -- thank your lucky stars! Could you consider just enjoying your Mom and delighting in her thrill and excitement of dressing up baby. Sounds like this is your first baby and her first grandchild. Just enjoy each other and don't sweat the small stuff!
I'm not saying you are not right! You are right! But, so what! Choose your battles for the important stuff!
Merry Christmas, love and delight in each other and be thankful for family!
S.

This is a little late, but I really wanted to comment.

My MIL is the same way and I think it is AWESOME. She either buys all my daughters special occasion clothes or makes them. You better believe they wear them (if made,they only wear them once and then into the keepsake box!)

To know that my MIL loves my girls that much and thinks about them all the time makes me so happy. Every time she comes over with a new outfit, my girls feel so special.

This is your mom, she is soooo excited to have a baby grand daughter. Let her have her fun. What's the harm.

If it really bothers you so much, why don't you go shopping with your mom and both of you pick it out.

This little girl is not all yours, she is here to share and be loved on by EVERYBODY. Let everyone love her how they want.

This is your child. Your mom has already had her chance to be mommy and dress her kids. It is not out of line for you to say to her, "we appreciate your offer to buy her clothes and dress her, but we would like to do this...." you do not need to offer an explanation, though, depending on your relationship, you may want to. Lastly, you don't have to put her in it. You are correct, nipping it in the bud is definitely the way to go. From experince.....Grandparents usually do not realize they are being intrusive or stepping on toes. You only get to be mommy to your little girl once...so, you should do it the way you like. You also don't want to strain your relationship with your mom to the point where it hurts the relationship between your daughter and her. It is better to speak up and take care of it now. Good luck, this is a tough road...

just a thought but babies are notorious for making a mess of their clothes either the stick their hands in something and wipe it on themselves or others or their diaper leaks, or they spit-up etc. Especially with all the excitement of company and festivities during holidays. My youngest granddaughter had three changes of clothes this just this morning. And she is a very neat baby compared to her father. It seems to me that your child can sort this out for you.
Deborah

You just might hate my advice BUT... Yeah, I am gonna give it,anyway :-) How many times do people have to tell parents to "choose your battles." Is this SOOooo important to you that you can't just let grandma indulge? Let me remind you about the "cost" Of those "outfits" and the fact it isn't JUST Money... the arguing and the stupid fights come 8 years old to 20years old! :-) When your mother does this make a comment to her about the lovely outfits she picks out and you really hope she plans on continuing this tradition in the childs teen years, too. Say it to her with a smile and if she says "SURE" hold her to that ...tell her you want a contract stating just that :-)
After that just put her in a diaper and let grandma have at it :-) I realize the baby is 2 months old and it's all "new to you" BUT, please prepare yourself for the future. Why make a mistake that you will grow to hate? There are too many mistakes in this world to learn them all on your own...learn some from others :-)

You could say, "Mom, thanks so much for the wonderful and cute outfits that you have given the baby. We, however, would appreciate it if you just give her outfits that she could wear daily and let us decide what and when she wears them. She could wear them more often than just once a year, and if we decide we want to dress her up on the holidays, we will get those outfits. Thanks again for your thoughtfulness." Good luck!

Why don't you let her do it? She wants to be involved with her granddaughter and this is a pretty positive way to do so considering many of the options out there that I have seen. I'm sure that it makes her feel good being able to contribute in this way. Also, your girl is still very young, some of the novelty will wear off. I say go ahead and give this "gift" to your mom. Enjoy your little one and let her do so to in her way.

say "thanks thats really cute" then dress her in the outfit you pick out. if she asks why then tell her you had already picked the out fit out and that she will wear her outfit some other time. i buy things for my grandbabies too but i dont expect them to wear them for special occasions. someitmes we go shopping together and she picks the outfit out or we do it togehter and i buy it. or she asks me to make his halloween costumes so thats not an issue

Maybe next time a special occasion comes up, prepare early and either shop very early (earlier then your mom) or invite your mom to come with you, and value her input but stand firm in what you would like to see your baby in.

Grandma's, lol.. Gotta love them!

Oh my goodness we go through the same thing with my MOM, she loves our girls to wear really dressy dresses which my girls hate and will never wear them again. its a big waist of money. I hate for my mom to spend money like that on those dresses. I hate to hurt her feelings, but one day I told my MOM please stop buying the girls such dressy dresses. its a waist of money. GUESS what she said? " its your dad and my money if we want to spend the money on it its our doing. I didnt have the heart to tell her that the girls dont like to dress up like that.
So LJ if you get some good feed back please let me know I could use some help also.
Take care, C.

My mom also bought a little christmas outfit for my son who is also two months old. She bought it well before thanksgiving and gave it to me. She wanted me to use it to take our holiday photo. Well, as you know life with a newborn is very busy so we didn't take the photo until last week. And thankfully, he had already grown out the outfit so he couldn't wear it ( it was so ugly, i didn't want to put him in it anyway). Just tell your mom you would like the chance to pick out the outfits yourself. If she wants to buy her dress-up clothes she can, but for the special holidays you and your husband would like to pick them.
Hope that helps! Good luck!

Just be grateful and enjoy it! This too shall pass. The baby is brand new and this will taper off as she gets older. Again be thankful that your MIL is able and willing to do so and that you do not have to spend money on those items and can instead use the money to buy your daughter something else special. Everything is the way you look at it -- either a burden or a blessing. I see this as a blessing. Just a thought. Merry Christmas.

My step-mom and other extended family love to buy and dress my little girl up. I also enjoy doing this myself. I think it's a blessing that they care enough to shop for my daughter. While I can understand wanting to dress them yourselves, I would also say just appreciate what they're doing. Not everyone has Grandparents that would do this. Dress them in your outfit and then change into the other one when you get to their house. Maybe they'll realize how little use they're getting out of the two outfits and stop buying them (althought I doubt this,) or you'll realize it's not worth you spending the $ on a outfit for your daughter and learn how great it can be to not have the buy these outfits. Someone doing something out of love for your child can't hurt.

That is a tough one. It is nice that you are doing that for your Grandma and making her feel important. My only two suggestions are recomment taking turns every holiday (Dad can do Christmas, Grandma can do Halloween, you can do Easter, etc.) or you can switch the outfits in the middle during one holiday and have her wear Grandma's for a little while and then yours for the rest of the day.
Happy New Year!

I think your Mom is just really excited about the baby. Let her know that you appreciate the outfits but maybe you can pick them out together in the future. I have all boys but I know my own mother is always so excited to pick out special dresses for my neice. Think of it as a gift where your baby can look extra festive on special days without any extra expense to you. I think you and your husband should just look at it as a gift. If your really dislike the outfits- drop some hints to her- such as -we don't think the baby is that comfortable in "frilly" clothes and prefer her in cotton etc. There will be plenty of time in the future to have your own opinions on disclipline, eating matters etc. where your choices will have to over-ride the ideas of your mother.

I understand how you feel, because my husband and I are very casual dressers. For the first few months or so of our daughters life my mother en-law and grandmother-enlaw would get fancy dresses, but I was lucky they stoped. Maybe you could tell your mom you would like to speak to her and tell her you do not want to hert her feeling and it is not that you do not appriciate outfits, but that you want to be more envolved in her special occasion outfits. Good luck

Merry Christmas!

Honestly, if that is the worst of your problems.....its cliche but true, I know people who would give their right arm to have their Mothers in their lives to spoil their kids!
That's what Grandparents are for, spoiling the Grandkids! So, she went out and bought some outfits w/o your knowledge, big deal. Like we don't change our babies clothes 3, 4, 5+ times a day because of spit-up or drool or leaky diapers.
My sons had at least two "holiday" outfits.
Rejoice in the fact that your Mom is here for you and has the means AND the love to do this for you and her Grandchild!

I would tell her that you love her help and that she buys your little ones outfits. But remind her, that it takes away your chance to pick out your babies special outfits. Compromise. When the next holiday comes up that you really want to be in charge of the outfit, tell her. Say I was thinking of getting her outfit for Valentine's Day, I saw something really cute and then tell her the next holdiay is hers. Maybe for Halloween you can work together on a costume if either of you are crafty. There are ways you can both enjoy yourself. Like some others say, enjoy it, my mom is the opposite, very thrifty and well "cheap". I would love it if she bought my kids some clothes!

I don't Want to sound mean, but I am a grandma of two beautiful girls and 1 boy. My daughter in law does not want me to get clothes for the girls either. And it REALLY hurts. Any time I have bought an outfit she complains I didn't get the right thing or she just doesn't like it. Why can't it just be accepted. Take a picture of them in it then do what you want with the outfit. Please let her have her fun. We love our girls and like to do things for them. I don't get to see them enough, so buying outfits for special occasions or everyday really makes us feel good!! We are not trying to take over (at least I'm not)we just feel good doing it.