My background is in education as I have a bachelor and master's degree in teaching. My master's degree is in reading. I left teaching in 2007 when I got married and we moved out of state. Over the years, I have been a SAHM and then I worked for two years as a paraprofessional. Then I decided to have a second child who is now six months old.
Long story short, we live on Long Island, in NY. We have been here for four years and need more space now with a second child. The upstairs needs to be dormered and the whole house, over a lot of time, needs work (kitchen, living area with no den).
My husband mainly works nights and if he isn't doing yard work or repairing something, he will sleep during the day. He also tends to take a nap by seven at night so there is no me working nights if he is sleeping by then. My mom babysits here and there but cannot do it regularly.
The best way for me to earn a good paycheck and cover daycare expenses plus pay someone to put older child on bus is for me to go back to teaching. I didn't love teaching before kids and now all I hear is how teachers are up until midnight doing work. I know myself and would fall apart if I had to do that with kids so young. My oldest is in Kindergarten.
Unless I could maybe find a reading teacher position which I would hope wouldn't be so much work as a regular classroom teacher, I'm not sure what to do.
Do I stay home another year, until the baby is closer to 2 1/2 to go back to work and try to let go of having no extra money to renovate the house? What would you do if you really did not like the type of job you could make the most money in order to net pay worth working for after childcare?
Thank you. PS. I've considered selling this house but the reality is the way our home is, not renovated, we probably would lose money. We would need a down payment for another house.
Thanks so much for the responses! I had a feeling tutoring would be the main suggestion, The problem with that is tutoring does not begin until kids get out of school, around 3:00. My oldest attends all day Kindergarten and arrives home off a bus at 4:00. If my husband needs to do stuff or wants to go to sleep, I would have to bring two kids to someone's house. That wouldn't work with a tired five year old and a baby soon to be crawling. As for daycare, I will only pay one daycare which seems like I planned it right. However, being that the oldest doesn't get on a bus until 8:37ish, I have to pay someone to put her on the bus in addition to if I need to leave my house between 6:30 and 7:00 to drop off the baby at daycare. There is a before school program at Alyssa's school I could pay for instead of the sitter for the bus. I would have to drop off two kids in two different places all before work. Alyssa would be at school two hours before it actually starts so there is guilt there. All things to consider. No one said it was going to be easy. Thanks for the ideas!
You are well qualified to tutor. Here in upstate, people pay $50 an hour or more for private tutoring from a certified teacher. So I'd imagine on LI it'd be even more.
You can use social media to get started. Set your own hours, why not look into it?
:)
My problem with your position is the word NEED. You don't NEED the things you listed, you WANT them. Personally, I chose to give up income for the one and only opportunity to be home with the kids. I'll never get that opportunity again. It was worth it.
Is there a concrete reason that you HAVE to remodel the house right now? Would there be any harm in waiting a few years? My thought is that with two kids in daycare (full-time for the baby, and half-time for the Kindergartener), that would eat up most of your salary anyway, unless daycare is cheap and teachers make a lot more in NY than they do here (which I'm thinking is not likely). If you could wait, daycare costs will reduce as your kids get older.
The other thing I'd say is this. If you know you didn't like teaching in 2007, I don't think the way teachers are treated and their workload has improved whatsoever in the intervening years. I wouldn't jump into that with the added stress of raising two small children, personally, unless you LOVE teaching. Which you don't.
A friend of mine who used to be a teacher went to work for one of those tutoring companies (Kaplan, maybe?) as a principal. She's in more of an administrative role, and really enjoys it. Being that you have a master's degree and have had teaching experience, maybe that's a thought. Or see if the State Board of Education is hiring - I have another friend who was the Exec Director of the SBE. She was never a teacher, but had a master's in education. There are ways you can use your skill set without being in the classroom full-time.
After reading your post, my first thought is.... whatever you do.. do not go back into the classroom. Children in the classroom deserve to have teacher who WANTS to be there, WANTS to teach and WANTS to help children. You clearly do not want that.
I agree that tutoring is a good avenue for you. However, you are very quick to drum up excuses as to why you could not tutor based on hours ,etc.
My suggestion is to sit down and go over your budget with a fine toothed comb. Figure out what your truly NEED and what you really just WANT.
Does your house NEED to be renovated right now to maintain safety for your family or do you WANT it renovated so it is nicer.
Think about delayed gratification. I feel blessed that I was able to stay home with my daughter. I would have sacrificed a lot in order to have that opportunity to be with her which means income, vacations, extra movies, restaurant dinners, etc. Your children are only small once and then the opportunity is gone.
I am not sure what you want. It sounds like you want to work but hate (or burned out)of your profession and you don't want to be around children in classroom setting.
I hope you are able to sit down, look at your situation and figure out what is best for your family.
Good luck
Why couldn't you tutor?
I don't know if going back to work is right for you or not. But, I will say that I am a reading specialist and I love it! I would never go back into the classroom, but I love my small groups or 1-1 teaching. Yes, it still has it's stresses, but not like classrooms. I rarely go in early or stay late. I never go in on weekends. I rarely bring home work with me. When I do. It is usually professional reading. I work my butt off at school, always eat lunch at my desk, and rarely talk to anyone about stuff that is not student/school related. I've learned to work smarter, not harder. I don't spend time making worksheets or games. My instruction is done with authentic reading materials, flash cards, individual white boards, and occasionally an iPad. I don't give assignments that need to be taken home to grade. I also work just 1/2 time. Now that both of our kids are in school I don't have to pay daycare with my 1/2 time status. See if you can shadow a reading specialist for a day and see what it is like. Look into part time positions. I don't know if is the right decision for you, but it is worth looking into.
Since the question you posed is "What would you do if you really did not like the type of job.....?" I have to answer I hope I would not go back to teaching. It would destroy your happiness and at the same time, would not be fair to the children. All my best.
I don't really know the extent of the renovations you are thinking of, but I can tell you that you can live in a much smaller space than you'd like to with two kids. Many families with 2 or more kids live in 2 bedroom apartments with less than 7 square feet. I'm not saying it's ideal, just that it is doable.
This is the kind of decision you probably need some time to really think about, consider any alternatives, explore options, etc.
I was very fortunate, because when I was pregnant with my second child I found a job as an adjunct at the local university. The pay was diddly squat, but it got my foot in the door (and gave me some much needed adult time). I taught one class, 2 nights a week, while my parents watched our oldest. Later, I was able to arrange a schedule where my husband was home one night and my parents watched the boys the other night. Now my kids are both in school, and I have a full-time job I love.
With a Master's Degree, I would seriously consider what opportunities my exist at a community college.
Do you need more room or do you want more room? My neighbours house is a 600sf slab house built in 1920. The man who built it lived there with his wife and together they raised six children in it. Raising children in small, outdated homes can be done. You need to decide for yourself what your priorities are, but I can guarantee you that if you stay at home with your children they will remember having you at home and they won't really care that they had a small bedroom or an ugly kitchen.
Don't forget about the costs involved in going back to work besides child care. You need a work wardrobe, car insurance rates go up, you'll have less time for cooking so you will need to buy more expensive convenience foods or dinners out, less time for cleaning and yard work, so you may need to hire help for those...
I would personally do what it takes to make your house work for you until both kids are in school full time, then renovate.
I'd think that you need to get a job where your husband can watch the children so you don't have to pay for child care. How about tutoring? Teaching jobs are hard to come by and child care will eat up most of your paycheck.
Well, there are a lot of kids who need reading help and working in the school system as a reading specialist might be a good job. If you don't like being in the actual classroom what about working in the office, as an aid again, doing something else. It's a steady job with good hours.
With a Masters couldn't you work in administration too?
See if you could get a part-time reading specialist position !
your local community college is your friend. they have wonky classes at wonky hours, and you could probably write your own ticket with your qualifications. and you'd be teaching a fair share of adults which would help with your classroom reluctance.
but honestly, it sounds as if you are pretty meh on teaching all round, and that will absolutely come across. none of us want our kids taught by teachers who aren't passionate about it, KWIM?
unless you're going to lose your shirt, i'd consider selling the house even at a loss, and getting something that will work better for your family and be less maintenance for you. if it allows you to stay home with your baby for another few years, it would probably be worth losing some equity value.
i'd like to see you do something to take the pressure off, A.. you seem like a really nice, smart, interesting woman who is getting clobbered over the head with challenges of late. i'd love to read some posts from you about how alyssa is thriving with her new friends and busy schedule, how much you're grooving on your time with your girls, and how much your dh is loving watching all his his healthy happy women flourish.
this is supposed to be one of the best times of your life. time to kick the drudgery to the curb and have some fun, babe.
you are the queen of over-thinking sometimes. :)
khairete
S.
I suppose you could tutor students.
That would bring in some money and you could set your own schedule.
Can your husband transfer his job to anywhere else?
Long Island is just an expensive place to live.
You pay a lot for a very small house - you'd be surprised what size house the same amount of money would buy you in other parts of the country.
Could your mom babysit and you substitute teach sometimes?
What hours does your hubby work? Mine works 7pm-7am. If he comes home and goes to sleep, he could wake up at 4pm to watch the kids for a bit while tutoring. If possible, he should adjust his schedule to support this at least a few days a week. If you taking on some extra work is the best thing for your family, the adjustment should be made. He can sleep until 4, be up for a few hours while you are out tutoring, make dinner for you and the kids, and take a nap when you get home!
Hey A.,
Teaching is a lifestyle, for sure. Not the job you want to go back to if your head isn't totally in it! You would be miserable. I noted you have a MA in Reading. Keep an eye on our company www.thereadingnetwork.com.
We are not hiring new instructors at the moment, but will be in the future and will need people to work a variety of hours. You might want to sign up for our News.
Cheers,
D.
The Reading Network
