Sleeping Issues - Burnsville,MN

Does he have some sort of musical stuffed animal like a glo worm, or a mobile that plays music? My little grandson, 14 months, will settle down almost immediently if I start singing 'Hush Little Baby'. My other grandson, almost 4, would stop figgiting in his sleep as soon as his glo worm started. The glo worm (now a seahorse) is motion and sound activated. So as soon as he gets restless it will play the music. The glo worm only costs about $10. I would get him one and when you put him to bed squeeze the glo worm and it will play, evertime he gets restless it will play. Hopefully it will let his brain know it's sleep time.

This could be teething--how many teeth does he have? Is this a new thing he is doing? Any new noises around the house inside or out?

Good luck Momma. Sleep deprivation is not fun.

So far it sounds like you've tried everything except feeding him.

Hungry babies don't sleep well. They may fall back to sleep, because they're exhausted, but then they'll just wake right back up again.

He's only 8 months old. Some babies have sloooooow metabolisms, and are petit slooooooow growers and don't need to eat around the clock... but most have normal metabolisms, and normal growth rates, and NEED to eat. Not solids (which are low nutrient and low calorie) but milk or formula.

When I lost my milk (at 9-10mo), I got a blessing in disguise: Premade bottles. Wake, shuffle to kitchen, nuke bottle, shuffle to nursery, hand over bottle, change diaper, shuffle back to bed. Elapsed time: 2 minutes flat. Heaven. 2 minutes didn't even begin to register as interrupted sleep. LOVED those premade bottles on the door of the fridge 5 feet from his room. Loved.

I am guessing you meant to say formula instead of milk. Their tummies are very tiny. He is probably hungry. Maybe if you feed him once during the night he won't keep waking from hunger over and over.

I have 4 kids all older now...now the issue is waking them up..LOL! But I remember these days very well. 2 of the four were like this. I am a stay at home mom and I remember talking to my doctor at my whits end! He said when baby sleeps YOU sleep those long 2-3 hours naps I would lay down too. I didn't get all my stuff done but it was a lot easier to deal with the up all nights. I also ended up watching some pretty good movies that I would have never even considered had I not been up at 3 in the morning! He will start sleeping through the night. I could never do the crying thing either so I sympathize with your anguish. Unfortunately they have their own little schedule they follow... sometimes no matter how hard you try. Good luck!

If he is screaming, pick him up. He likely is hungry - feed him. I would also put him to bed later. We put DS to bed after his (hopefully last) feeding at 11:30 pm - 12 am - when we went to bed. Then when he slept 6 hours and woke up it was just about morning.

He ate, woke, napped and slept on his own schedule. So when I say we put him to bed when we went to bed - we put him in his crib as opposed to on a mat, in his bassinet, etc. The schedule looked like this - wake (screaming in hunger), eat, change diaper, be awake a bit, sleep, repeat q 3-4 hours until 'bedtime', sleep (hopefully) 6-7 hours then repeat.

Babies scream because they need something - they have no other method of communication. That something could be food, discomfort or a need for human contact. Our job in raising babies who are secure in their world is to fill those needs. Babies who are picked up do NOT learn to manipulate their parents. Research shows they actually become more self sufficient and secure than babies that are ignored.

Oh boy does that sound like my son! I swear one of the best kept secrets about parenting is that not all babies sleep through the night. My oldest didn't sleep through the night consistently until he was 16 months.

He is normal!!! I know that's not what you want to hear, because you're only human and you need your sleep. But there isn't anything wrong with him. His body just isn't ready to sleep through the night.

There were a couple of things that we did that really, really helped when our boys were that age. First, feed him. Who cares whether or not he "should" be hungry. Just feed him. He will go back to sleep about 90% of the time if you feed him. Second, when that doesn't do the trick go ahead and rock him to sleep or bring him to bed with you. You won't start a habit. Babies chance their habits so fast at that age. Right now he needs you and he needs your hugs and kisses and he needs to be held. Our boys just wanted to sleep closes to us. Once we started bringing them into bed we started sleeping so much better. They are now 3 and 5 1/2. They do come into our bed once in a blue moon, but they love their own beds.

Good luck!!! It will get better.

I'm in the minority here, as I don't think that this situation is related to his being hungry. My opinion is that the last thing you want is for him to get used to "needing" food to get back to sleep. He really is old enough to sleep all night, he just doesn't know how.

I believe he's taking such a long nap in the morning because he's as exhausted as you are after the long night! When he wakes up, go in the room, no lights, and no talking except to say something soothing when you lay him back down - do not pick him up. Then, sit on a chair or the floor next to his bed, but do not look at him or engage. He may still cry, but do not engage unless he sits up (or stands, if he's pulling himself up). Each time you need to lay him back down, sit down further away from the crib - closer to the door.

Just try this out for a few nights to see if it helps (although it may take a week or longer) before you get in the habit of feeding him. If you read anything or even talk to your doctor, you will find out that they do not NEED to eat, but that becomes a soother, which is a very hard habit to break. Good luck!

My midwife told me once, there are sleepers and there are non-sleepers. I had non-sleepers that would wake anywhere from every 2 hours to sometimes I would get an occasional 4 hours. They did not sleep through the night until they were in their three's. I co-slept, which helped a lot so I could nurse quickly and get back to sleep quickly. Your baby needs you, that is how they communicate.....they are little for a very short time and this too will pass. Hang in there and take a nap during the day if you can.

I would try less nap time in the morning and maybe 2 hours in the after noon and in bed no later than 7 p.m. If he woke once in the night you could take care of him and put him right back down with no lights and talking, etc. He's old enough to sleep all night. Sometimes they are too hot and since you mentioned plenty warm maybe he's too warm. If that isn't the case he should be able to sleep all night. I think around this age it seems to get worse rather than better as they don't like being away from you and are more social than when younger. Crying it out won't hurt him if he's dry, nothing hurts him, etc. It won't last but a few nights at the most.

Dear H.,

You have my utmost sympathy! Our first was just like this, although she woke far more than just once (you're lucky!) and eventually we decided that although the sleep deprivation was the pits (and was totally interfering with my life), we were just going to wait it out. We, too, had tried everything...and not just in mickey-mouse ways...we actually did try things consistently and firmly, but nothing worked. Finally, one glorious day when she was 16 months old, she slept through the night, and has ever since. She is now 2.5.

We have a baby who is almost 7 months old and he goes down for the night fairly easily...and then wakes up usually within an hour...goes down again, and then can be up during the night anywhere from 2 to 5 times, wanting to nurse (probably for comfort). I haven't written about it here because I just figure that like our daughter, he will sleep through when he's ready to and nothing I will do will help. I'll be curious to see how others respond to your post...I feel for you! I know how hard it is to be so tired during the day.

R.

My son was just like this - I am so sorry. He did not sleep through the night till he was closer to 2...really he was good at sleeping by the time he was 3. We never could figure it out. We did cry it out even with him and all it did was get him to sleep 3 hrs at a time. I feel for you - I really think some babies just don't sleep well and maybe it has to do with personality. One guess we had was teething kept waking him up and maybe he had a harder time with teething than other kids. Another guess was it was just habit and he had no self soothing ability. He's a very intense, very sensitive kid...he is 7 now and still is a bit of a handful!

Hi H.,
I'm sure that most moms on this listserv can relate! Get the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Weissbluth. It SAVED me. Follow it & it will work! He needs to go to bed around 6pm, should wake up only once a night to nurse/have a bottle, and go straight back to sleep. And, he's really old enough to make it through the entire night. He should wake up around 6am (sorry, it's an early morning, but it honors a baby's natural rhythms). Nap at 9am, for AT LEAST an hour. Nap at 1pm for AT LEAST an hour. Back in bed at 6pm.
Good luck!
E.

My boys both woke up 2-3 times to nurse during the night at that age. They would nurse around 7:30, at 11:00, and 2:00 then go to 5 or 6 depending on my luck that particular day:) If you're doing formula, I don't know what the comparison is, and I've heard that formula babies go longer between feedings. However, my kids always ate during the night at that age. With my first, we co-slept because that was the only way any of us got sleep. With my second, he slept in our room so I could grab him at first signs of hunger, take care of it, and put him back to bed (yes, that process was still about an hour, but he stayed kinda sleepy and usually went back in the pack n play fine.)

So I guess this is along way of saying that he might be hungry, even if he's loaded up at bedtime. In fact, I've heard that if they eat too much at bedtime, that causes problems too:( Not saying you're doing that, just something to consider:)

My kids slept better at night when they dropped the morning nap and just took a two-hour afternoon nap, for what that's worth:) At 8 mos, though, my second still sometimes took a 45 min morning nap and a 2 hour afternoon nap.

Good luck -- it's tough when you're not getting enough sleep and have to deal with this!!!