I have a 19mth old daughter who has had her fair share of issues. The most concerning one that I feel is out of my control anymore is her sleep habits and growing aggressive behavior. I truely believe her behavior and tanturms are a direct result of her poor sleep, but have tried every thing to get her to sleep through the night. She doesn't self soothe well primarily because she has suffered from torticollis and reflux since she was 2 mths old. She has grown to be very demanding. And when directed by our pediatrician to try the Ferber method she would go into a rage and scream til she would vomit and/or poop herself. She tends to stuff her fingers and hands into her mouth when she is having a screaming episode. As a last resort we have even tired the cry it out method which did not work either. I know kids who are overly tired tend to have trouble unwinding so we have the same calming bed time routine every night. When she hasn't napped well during the day we put her to bed early in hopes to keep her from getting too tired. She takes one nap in the afternoons anywhere from 45 minutes to 2 1/2 hours long. She was also nursed until she was 16mths when I had to wean her due to reoccuring mastitis. She is on Zantac for her reflux and has her mattress elevated on one end as well. I am struggling with my own sleep now as I have a hard time falling asleep and staying asleep. I know that melotonin can be helpful for adults, but wondered if anyone had experience using in in kids as a way to reset her time clock for sleeping. I strongly feel if I could get her to sleep through the night that we will see a decrease in the aggressive behavior and tanturms. When I say aggressive behaviors when she is told not to do something or gets taken away from something she doesn't want to be she will scracth and bite at you. We have tried to distract her and have tired the naughty corner, but have not found a way to diffuse the tantrums. Does anyone have any advise in helping me deal with my daughter sleep problems and behavior. I am overwhelmed and exhausted and have very little resources for help with her as most my family is out of town and husband is working and isn't home some nights to help with her.
Thank you all for your repsonses. I feel as though I should explain things in more detail as to her history. She was 3 weeks early, started spitting up by 4 weeks of age. We had an ultrasound done to rule out pyloric stenosis which her big brother had when he was born. He was 4 weeks early and by 4 weeks of age had projectile vomiting and then found the pyloric stenosis which was surgically repaired. Back to my daughter. I was told then that it was reflux and put on Zantac. She started having sleep issues from the get go screaming came on close to night time and we took her back in close to her 2 mth check up for this. Was told it was colic and there was nothing we could do for it. A couple weeks later we saw her regular pediatrician in the group and was told she had torticollis and anioscuria. Prescribed physcial therapy for the torticollis and sent to an opthalmologist for the eyes. Was never told what causes torticollis however from researching in on my own found out it may be due to trauama at birth which she did have some facial bruising as well as a hemorrage in her right eye (the same eye with the uneven pupil size). I wanted to try cranial sacral therapy and my pediatrician disagreed with it so I found a new pediatrician. The new one was more holistic and through pt, cst, and eventually chiropractic the torticollis has resolved. However during that time we resorted to co sleeping for pure necessity because we could not get her to sleep any other way. IWe transitioned her to her crib in our room and slowly moved the crib to her room. She is get early intervention services for gross and fine motor delays. She is not talking well yet, but I was assured by their trained staff that they can only work on one skill at a time and that it will come. This is becoming more of a concnern for me because she does have a hard time communicating to me what she needs and she is hard to read otherwise. She does know some sign language. I will continue to bring it up with her pediatrician about the sleep. Perhaps they aren't looking at the big picture. Thank you again for all your help.
I have a friend who uses Melotonin for her 3 year old. She said without it he wouldn't sleep, and now he sleeps all night. I would talk to you daughter's doctor, and see what they say about it. Hope everything works out for you.
I can completely sympathize!! I also have a daughter(she is 7yo now) who suffered from torticolis and reflux. She also had the exact same behavior and was removed from daycare because of her biting. We never really found out why her behavior was so bad. Of course the Doctors always blame the parents. We tried everything. And I have two "normal" children. I just now read that children that do not crawl when infants have these type of developmental troubles. If it is any help, she is fine now. She grew out of that phase rather quickly.I also suggest getting a second opinion. I wish I had.
If you think part of her issues at night might be reflux related, have you tried another medication? Sometimes just a switch in meds can make a world of difference. Zantac is an H2 blocker. . Our daughter is almost 4 and takes Prevacid solutabs which is a PPI. .proton pump inhibitor. . .both reduce acid, but they work differently. If she's uncomfortable due to her reflux, it might be worth a try if it hasn't been tried already. When our daughter's reflux is flaring even WITH medication, she describes that her throat won't come out or something similar. I wonder if your daughter is having a similar sensation that is making her want to put her fingers further back in her mouth. . .she just can't verbalize it well because of her age.
Either way, I'd definitely get a second opinion. Sounds stressful on everyone. Good luck and let me know if you'd like to talk more about reflux. We have lots of experience with our daughter.
E.
There are herbal supplements on the market, some thing with chamomile in them. I bought and tried some with my daughter on her first airplane trip. I waited to try it until the second plane, it helped her calm down, didn't make her sleepy, but she much easier to handle. You might want to look into it, here's one site. http://www.herbalremedies.com/planetary-herbals-calm-chil...
It might help. Good luck.
do not give any medicine without talking to a doctor. There are some brands of melatonin that are better than others. She needs to be evaluated by a doctor. Sounds like you already have a gastro. Talk to him and maybe have him consult with a neurologist. She nay have some developmental delays going on if she was a preemie. She may be wanting to tell you something but does not have the communcation skills yet. It sounds like you are very tired. I know I don't always think clearly when I am too tired. !9 months old is very young. My son had tantrums when he was 2 and 3 and it was due to his frustration of not being able to tell us what was going on. PLEASE talk to your doctor.......
Have you had your daughter tested for allergies? Sometimes allergies can present themselves as a sleep and behavior issue. You could try putting her on an elimination diet and see if that helps. You would start with the big known food allergens like milk, soy, wheat, eggs. You wouldn't have do do them all at once but start with milk and remove all milk from her diet for about a month and see if it helps. If there is no change you can then move on to another food. It's very time consuming but would be 100% worth the effort if it helps your child. You will have to remove all sources of the allergen so you will need to read food labels as they seem to put milk or milk proteins int everything.
As for herbs to help your DD sleep I would caution away from using melatonin. It can mess up her natural production of the hormone and cause more problems than it fixes. You do not want her to become dependent on it for sleep. There are other things you can try. You can get a nighty night tea and give it to her with her during her bed time routine. You can try using calms forte. It is a homeopathic remedy to help your child calm down. There are also products from Bach's that can help your child relax and sleep better. http://www.bachflower.com/children.htm
If all else fails you could try co-sleeping with your child. Simply having you near her at night may be enough to help her (and you) sleep better.
Melotonin works. My 5 year old grandbaby was acting out and being hateful when night come. She was given melotonin and within 30 minutes was ready for bed. Give it a try.
Wow, Have you thought of getting a second opinion from another physician? Perhaps there is something else going on with your child that may have been over-looked. Also at 19mos. I think your child has learned to manipulate mommy and daddy.
L.,
Talk to your pediatrician. You should trust you gut on the sleep issue, and find out what you can do to help her. My suggestion would be a developmental pediatrician, who you can find at your nearest children's hospital. You may be absolutly correct about the cause of her sleep problem, but you could also be missing something, and you will want to know for sure. A developmentalist will do a complete evaluation that will include a sleep-wake evaluation if that is needed, and you really do not want to be stabbing in the dark guessing about something that is clearly making her, and you, miserable most of the time.
My children have developmental delays, and one has a full blown sleep-wake disorder and takes medication that helps her sleep. It made all the difference in the world for her to sleep well. She did not start this medication unitl she was 3, but her speech, coordination, language, behavior (everything) improved once she slept well. She may be missing out on some very important early learning if she does not get the rest she needs.
Good luck.
M.
Have you had her evaluated by her pediatrician for any other issues? I would have an open conversation with your pediatrician about these issues. Be totally honest about what you do and ask about melatonin. It was recommended to us for you 7 year old, but I do not know at what age it is considered safe as it is a supplement and not a medication it is not FDA regulated. If you don't feel like your pediatrician is being helpful, get a different one or ask for a referral. I have heard of young children who have seizures while they sleep and that causes severe behavior issues. 19 months is so young that a lot of those typical discipline methods don't work. Just don't give up - if your pediatrician can't offer better advice than Ferber method, seek another opinion - there are so many things that can effect a young child's behavior, children who don't hear well or have a hard time communicating their wants and needs act out. Good luck!
