Sleep - Yakima, WA

I had sleep problems at night with my 2 1/2 year old daughter also. I reallygot a lot out of the book "sleep easy solution".

Have you tried getting her up early with you? Perhaps keep her from taking a nap so she is tired when bedtime comes around? When I had the same problem with my little daughter, these are the things that I did to help transition her into an early bedtime. I also think that employing the same nighttime routine every night with consistency will help her to know what she is supposed to do. Put her back to bed 10 times if you have to, but don't give in and take her to bed with you. Good luck to you! :)

Hello my name is T.. And I have 3 girls Lexi 7 & twins Isabella & Haley 15 month olds & also my almost 5 yr old boy Caden. When Lexi was 2 1/2 we started having her sleep in her own bed room. I had to put up a baby gate in her door way so she wasnt scared with the door being shut. And I started out reading to her till she fell asleep & would sometimes fall asleep my self... But that seemed to work really well for me & then when Caden was born she was already ok with sleeping alone by then. Hope this helps???

We had the same issue. We read a lot of books; the advice that worked for us was to put our daughter to bed and read to her for 15-20 minutes and then sing a song. We choose Snuggle Puppy from the Remarkable Cows CD. Sometimes we'd have to sing it 3, 4, 5 times before our daughter would fall asleep. If she didn't fall asleep, we would then tell her that we had to make a really important phone call for work or to grandma or grandpa and that she had to stay in bed but that as soon as we were done with our "work" we would come back and "check on her". Most of the time when we came back to check, she'd be asleep. If she wasn't we'd sing again and repeat the process. If she gets up, keep putting her back in her own room an singing. The first few times it may take a couple hours, but once she realizes she can't come into your room, she'll stay in her own. And, be prepared; once she realizes this she may start saying she's 'scared' to be in her room or come up with any other excuse to be in your room. Don't fall for it. Gently lead her back into her room, sing to her, and reassure her that you're right next door. Our daughter is now 8; she no longer requests "check ups" but we still sing Snuggle Puppy to her every night.

My little girl just turned 3 and we had a simiar problem. It took tough love and trial and error to get her to stay in her bed. We now have a bed time routine that we stick to every night. She says good night to her dad and then she turns off the TV in the living room (even if we are staying up we let her turn it off... that way she does not feel like she is missing out on things). We go into her room and she turns on her CD player and we read 2 books in her bed. I give her kisses and then leave her room and shut the door.
It took a while to get there... she would get out of bed and come down the hallway. I would pick her up and plop her back into bed and tell her it was time to go to sleep. I would have to put her back into bed sometimes 5 or 6 times before she would stay for the night. After a few days she knew that if she got up she would end up back in bed so she stopped trying.
Good luck!

Consistency is the key. Don't make bed time be a punishment. Try having a nice hot bath with a drop of some soothing lavender essential oil in it right before bed. When you are laying her down, during your routine explain to her the importance of sleep and how it lets her brain soak up all the exciting things she learned that day and that when she wakes up she'll have room for so much more!!! Encourage her to understand that sleep is helping her body to grow big and strong and have lots of energy for the next day. The other trick is hard to do as a mom but is does seem very effective: DON"T SOOTH! Once you have put your daughter to bed and said goodnight, leave the room, then when you have to return for any reason DO NOT TALK,SING,WHISPER..., put her back in bed and walk right back out. Repeat consistently as needed. It is very hard on the parents, but the reward is well worth it! It also takes less time, in the long run, because your child is able to understand that you mean business, there is no fooling around with this one. It is not mean, it helping your daughter to learn self discipline. Oh Yeah, ALWAYS REMEMBER TO TELL HER YOU LOVE HER!!!

P.S. The hardest thing for me was letting my girl cry and cry and cry and then wait, what, what's that? SILENCE! She went to sleep. After less than a week of really hard consistent work, she was finally going to sleep in her own room and sleeping through the night. AHHHHHH!!!!! I know nothing is the same for everyone, but I have heard other good stories about this trick too.

My parents tell a story of when I was little and didn't want to go to bed and wouldn't stay in my room at about the same age. They put a lock on the outside of my door and locked it - one time....apparently I didn't want to feel locked in again so they only had to do it once. They said they would then have to gently open my door whenever they came in my room, as I would drag all my bedding, sleep buddies and sleep at the door. Although relatives thought they were cruel, it cured me after one time of being "locked" in. With todays monitors it would be easy to still monitor safety. Although my parents never had a monitor.
I currently have a 18 month old and she still sleeps in her crib, so haven't crossed the bed issue myself. I also have two step kids who are 13 and 15 and we have them all the time.
Hope it helps.

Hi T.,
If your open to continue co-sleeping your almost there. We co-sleep with both ours and somewhere between 2 and 3 they figure out how to sleep w/o hoging and kicking all night.
good luck.

Consistency... She has already learned that she can get her way with you and you will give in. Try sitting in her room, do not talk to her. If she gets out of bed put her back but do not say anything. Or find a punishment that will make her stop. Or try a reward system but make it strict... She can't get out of bed and still get something - all or nothing!

Hi there, I have 2 1/2 yr. old g/b/b triplets and when Daddy is home, they go to sleep no problem. When I am home alone putting them to bed, it's a circus going from room to room putting them back into bed for up to 2 hours! Our pediatrician told me to put chain locks on the outside of the door so that they can open it a little bit and see me but let them figure out that they need to stay in there. She's the best Dr. I have ever met and I trust her but I haven't been able to do the locks yet - a Mommy issue =) I plan on it this weekend though - she explained it is my job to train them to sleep (they need that for a healthy sleep habit and their health in general so I am going to do it).

Be very consistent about putting her to bed at the same time and if she gets up put her right back. It may take a few nights but she will get the point. I saw this on the Nanny show with Jo Frost. She also has a book out that may help you. Good luck.

This may sound cruel, but one thing I've heard that works is to turn her doorhandle around so the lock is on the outside...and lock her in, at least until she is asleep. (You can unlock it afterwards, for safety reasons, in case of a fire, etc.)

Another idea that i've heard is to give her a little "garden." (This was in a case of a girl calling her parents in over and over.) Each time you see her after bedtime, take one of her flowers away. (Wooden popsicle sticks with paper flowers pasted to them will work just fine.) Three strikes, and she'll be out of flowers. Their little girl was so fond of the flowers, she stopped calling her parents altogether!

Hope that helps!

Thankfully, I'm not there yet, but I wanted to share this tip with you: I read a suggestion once by a mom who said she discouraged her little bed-hog from sleeping with them by doing it back to her, gently crowding her a bit in between them (a toddler, NOT an infant!). When she squirmed and complained, they said "Well, the bed is too small for the three of us now that you're such a big girl; that's why you have your own big girl bed." While she wouldn't accept their verbal argument, she was quickly convinced by the physical hassle. I know that only covers one aspect of your issue, but I hope it helps.

Hey T.,
Get her a sleeping bag and tell her if she wants to sleep in your room.... and you can understand that she wants to be by you,she will have to sleep in the bag on the floor beside your bed. I have a 16 year old daughter and a 13 year old son. It worked by the 3rd night. Good luck! N.

Have you tried waking her up every morning at the same time like at 6 or 7 even if she went to bed late. make her get up and after a week or so of getting up early her bed time will come earlier to it might take time but it may turn her sleep pattern around. I did this with my oldest son and it worked well by 8 or 9 he couldnt keep his eyes open. plus no sugar or anything that may keep her awake at night. I don't know this might work it 's wortha try! God bless you!

Oh T.,
Isn't having a toddler fun! And exhausting.
One effect of growing up is that situations and routines change and we all know that getting used to a routine takes time.
How long have you had this new sleep routine?
She obviously misses you. So maybe you could lay down with her. Read in her bed. Do the activity books in her bed. Pretend to fall asleep at night in her bed. (Although you just might truly fall asleep, right?)
Keep all bedtime routines in her bed. When she gets up, you calmly put her back in her bed.
Foster the feeling that her bed is the coziest place to be.
I had this situation with my oldest, and it takes time for things to settle into a sleep routine. Possibly weeks. But it will settle. Really.

I have an 8 month old baby who was waking up every hour at night. I was very desperate and was looking to letting him cry it out. So i went online to research infant sleep and came across the greatest book ever (it gave me my sanity back) it is by Elizabeth Pantley called "No Cry Sleep Solution". She also has one that is more age appropriate for your daughter called "No cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers." Her website is www.pantley.com. I highly recommend this book and website I even emailed her with a question about my child's sleep and she responded the same day. She is a mother of 5 who has gone through the same struggles of sleep as we have and understands the frustration. I hope this helps, it really helped me! Let me know how it goes.

You need Super Nanny!! Seriously, they have had a ton of shows on just this problem- kids not going to bed when they are supposed to. I think more of a problem has been created by letting her sleep with you. My son did this when he was about three. He didn't want to go to sleep by himself and always said he was scared of monsters in his room. We would put him in bed and ten minutes later we would find him belly crawling behind the couch. Unfortunately, it's going to get worse before it gets better. Choose a bedtime and stick to it. It may take you four hours the first night, but keep putting her back in bed. You don't need to say anything, just pick her up and put her back in bed. Continue doing this until she stays. I'm sure it will take several nights of this and you will be exhausted but I bet it will work. Don't lose your temper and remember do not make conversation with her. What ultimately helped our son a little was some Pokemon (this was 8 years ago when they were popular) Christmas lights/string lights. We hung these above his bed and turned them on when it was his bedtime. I think it only took about four days for him to get the point. Good luck!!!

As far as timing goes, the best way to readjust her schedule is to wake her up in the morning. She probably sleeps 10-12 hours at night, so decide what time you want her to go to bed at night, and use that to figure out what time to wake her in the morning. You can either do it all at once and have about a week of tired and cranky, or you can do it slowly by moving her 30 minutes every few days and have a month of changes. Either way, a night of letting her stay up with you again will mess it up, so be consistent at least for the first couple months. I think the all at once approach is easiest because she will resist for a couple days, but after that it will all catch up to her and she will be too tired to resist falling asleep when you want her to.

You can't change her bedtime and sleeping arrangements all at once, but you can choose which one bothers you most and tackle that one first and the other in a month or so.

To get her out of your bed, you can again do it all at once using Supernanny's "staying in bed" technique... "The first time she gets out of bed, escort her back and explain that it's bedtime. Give her a little cuddle, then leave. When she gets up again, put her back to bed and say, 'It's bedtime, darling.' Give her another cuddle and leave. The third time, and any other time after that, put her back to bed without saying a word." It may take hours at first, but it will work within a week. You could also take the slower approach of putting her to sleep on your floor and slowly moving her mattress a few inches each night until she is in her own room. Again, I think Supernanny's short and sweet method would work better.

Good luck!

I don't know. I do the same thing once and awhile. But if you check up on them the pyschology then she knows there is someone there to get attention from. Do the whole routine then when she comes out and calls for mom and dad. If you are both awake play the ignore game for ten/15 mins. The super nanny taught that somewhere. you ignore but you are interacting with your husband. You act like she is there and all they do is mom/dad mommy daddy.. and so on.. my daughter goes mommy daddy... and say HELLO MOMMY HELLO MOMMY. They are there but you are ignorning them. I did that longest is 10 to 15 minutes at the most. (note you have to have a lot of heart and a lot of patience for this.)(this teaches them they will not always get attention for being seen and heard or rowdy. I also notice kids do this when they are in elementary school, and even kindergarten, because they know who to play with and not. Make sure you know you and your husband can handle this. Don't say her name. If she is at a spot next to your husband move her and don't say anything. Make it like you are moving an object because you want to sit next to your husband. You have to not really notice her. But in your sight she is there and she is safe.) I did it this way then after the ten to 15 minutes. I was persistant about it. especially when she refuses to go to bed. YOu really REALLY have to have heart and patience. I do advise do not do this to little babies but kids who are physically able capable of functioning and are really verbal. KNOW YOUR CHILD) I am not an expert.) Then after the minutes say hey there you are "name" you were not listening you were supposed to be in bed. go to the naughty or time out chair (actually hold their hand and walk there to put them there.) Since your daughter is close to my daughters age leave her there for 3 minutes. She had the chance to scream and roam for that amount of time. now it's her turn. Tell her why she is being naughty then after the naughty chair for three minutes ask her if she knows why she is there and then tell her go to bed/take a nap. ALso if she gets out during before the end time of three minutes keep sending her back like putting back an object but don't acknowledg her name just keep putting her back and back and don't tell her anything. at all. At least you are not beating or hitting them. Start the time over. But if you want a minute in a half if they are short about it reduce the time. Kids attention is short. This will be mentally and physically exhausting but it is worth it. Please do not trying different things and switch and switch because you can't be patiend. (after the time out for them take thema and put them to bed.) DO it the same way everytime. Be persistent. Tell them this "this is bed time. If this happens to you again this is what will happen. Naughty chair. Don't explain everything and tell your child a spiel." Don't forget before you leave and tuck them in to say good night and you love them." It's a tough love way. ("It's better than the old saying I hit you because I love.") I am not like that. (That's mental game and negativity.) Also if she comes out of her room after that keep putting her back to bed like she is not there.

Hi,
Have you watched any of the Super Nanny shows? She has a technique where you do your routine, put your child in bed with hugs and kisses and then leave. If the child gets up, then you say "time for bed" and take her back to bed. Each repeated time she gets up, you walk her back to bed, without conversation or eye contact. What the child is looking for is interaction with you. If you do not talk and simply put them back in bed, they eventually give up. It takes consistency and control, especially the first time and may take a long time the first couple of nights, but she will eventually stop getting up!

Mom of 2 year old and stepmom to 11 year old

Two of my kids have autism and when they were little, they had sleep issues. Some parents recommended melatonin which was a life savor. I give them a little 100 mg pill of melatonin which tastes like cherry and disolves in their mouth and then I do the nightime routine - brush teeth, have prayers, read story and then it's like magic. About 1/2 hour after they take it they're zonked in their bed. I used it a lot more when they were younger and now I use it only occasionally. It hasn't been addictive and it's perfectly safe. You can buy it over the counter or at GNC. That may be one option to try. Good luck.

You could try putting a child proof knob on the door so she cant get out of her room to play. We just got a new room ready
for our son and the only thing in it to start with is a bed and dresser, a couple of stuffed animals and a night light. Later after he understands the difference between sleep and play we will add his toys. We have had great luck with child proof knobs, gates & baby monitor. We also have smoke detectors in every bedroom for safety. I may not be the best person for advice since my son has been used to having the door closed from early on. Another solution may be to keep putting her back in her bed all night for a few days until she understands or gives in - eventually she will understand that you are in charge and that you won't give in to her getting out of bed. Also you could try some sort of reward system where she get something special in the morning if she stays in her bed all night (special pajamas, toy or sticker). Good luck!

Hi T., I hope this helps you some, let me know what you think. When my husband came home from a three month deployment Summer (our daughter) was not happy about moving back to her bed. I know I should have not let her sleep with me but it was so much easier. So I did not get upset or mad at her because I felt I had made this problem by leting her have her way. So now she was in charge and I had to change that and let her know I was the Mom and what I said goes. I took one of our baby gates and put it in her door way. After we went through her night time routen and a routen is very important so she know it is bedtime. She was bathed, read too and we said our prayers. I plugged in her night light, tucked her in, told her to stay in bed and go to sleep. I would turn out her light, hop over the gate and close the door. We also put a night light in the hallway outside her door and turned the hall light out. A get ready for the show! It took about four night to get her to sleep in her bed. One night I had to sleep outside the door to keep her from knocking the gate down and get out. I did not get much sleep for those days but in the end it worked out well. Hope this works for you or you work it out. Shan

This may sound a bit harsh, but can she get out of her room if you put a doorknob cover on the inside? Just take out anything in her room she could hurt herself on and let her tantrum away.

Or if you have the patience and the time- after you've read her story (or whatever last step in bedtime routine is) turn off the lights and sit in her room. Don't talk to her just sit there til she gets bored and falls asleep. You could start by sitting on her bed, then the next night on the floor, then in the doorway, then in the hall with the door open... I spent a weeks worth of naptimes sitting in the hall (reading adult books, yay) when we moved from a crib to a big kid bed.

I have twins who used to do the smae thing. I used a book called the Sleep ladies guide to better sleep. It worked great.

Hi T., L. Kee here. I went through this with my oldest boy, (now 18). A few things that worked for me: 1. Like you said, routine is important. I usually told him I would read him a story if he promised to go to sleep. If he did not do it, no story the next night. 2. Bribary is your friend! If you stay in your bed I will make your favorite breakfast, if not we will have oatmeal. 3. Stick to your guns. It might take you all night making him go back to bed, but do not give in, punishing him each time he get's up. I tell you, this went on for about a month, every single night. I lost my patience many times. But trust me...."this too shall pass!"

I read your concern and think that I may be able to help. I definitely think that she has found a payoff in responding in these ways. It sounds like she simply likes to be a part of your lives and wants to be with you. And, she definitely knows what she is doing. They understand so much at such a young age and I really think that she's playing a game with you. So, have you tried putting her to bed and checking on her in 5 minutes, then 10, 15, etc.? Since she's getting up, the Supernanny shows that like a timeout, whenever the child gets up, put her back to bed and say goodnight sweetheart, then the next time she gets up put her back and say goodnight, then the next time lay her down without saying anything, and from here on out, don't say anything or make eye contact. This may take a few hours the first night. She will eventually will wear out. She won't have any payoff with either of these. And, stay consistent with these. Then down the road she will understand that coming into your bed is a once in awhile thing which you may want to do in the mornings only at first. I sure hope this helps. It's such a process but there is always a payoff for kids doing these types of things.

Hi there,

I am a mother of four and my best advice is to follow SuperNanny's advice which is what we had to do with our third child at age two. She recommends, doing the normal bedtime routine and making sure all the child's needs are met, stories, songs, snuggles, water, etc. This way you know that all her needs were met if they say, "I'm thirsty" after that or whatever. Next be prepared to dedicate 45 min. or so the first night of getting her to bed. What you do is you put her in her bed and say, "good night." The first time she gets out of bed, you say something like, "Oh darling, let's go back to bed." in a very positive upbeat way while holding her hand. From then on if she gets out of bed for whatever reason, you simply take her hand and lead her back to bed without talking to her or expressing any emotion. There is no disappointed look and at the same time no smiles. It seemed like the first night we were silently leading her back to be about 20 times. The second night it was maybe 5 or 6. The third night was probably twice. The fourth night was amazingly so much easier. The one thing to keep in mind is to make sure daddy is in on this because my husband would tend to want to talk to her and give her more hugs, etc. Basically, this concept just taught our daughter that she can get all the attention she wants before bedtime. Before I tried this I tended to cater to her requests such as, I want water, sing another song, I want another hug. It is easy to do as a mother because I didn't think that those things were wrong, however, it gave her the attention she wanted and further delayed her bedtime. I hope this helps.

I have a four year old and a 2 1/2 yr. old girl. I have gone through this twice now. The first thing, ensure you are consistent about your nighttime routine...it makes bedtime more predictable. We do bath, jammies (she picks them out), 1 book or a 1/2 hr. TV show - her choice. She knows it's now time to go brush teeth, pray, hugs/kisses and go to bed. Both of them have gotten out of bed as well...they were good for a week or so when first sleeping in their own bed, but then would start screaming for us, or just get up and open door. What has worked for us when this happened...again a routine. First time we listen and respond (maybe water, maybe need to go potty (again), etc. After that, we tell them they have to go to sleep...no more kisses/hugs etc. If they get up again or call for us, we go up and tell them we will take away their favorite toy (Barbie for my 4 yr. old and books for my 2 1/2 yr. old)...for my 2 1/2 yr. old I show her a stack of books and tell her I will take them and throw them away. She cries for about 30 seconds, I tell her if she stays in bed/goes to sleep, no more crying and I will put them back in the morning. One time, she didn't listen and I showed her another stack of books....that's all it took. Since then, it's just a hint of taking books, and she stops. My 4 yr. old is fine. Consistency in the practice between you and your husband is fine...also, staying calm is key...I never want her to think I'm angry, just that I want her to get her sleep. Hope this helps.

Have you ever watched Supernanny? I think it is on ABC. Anyway, she has the perfect answer for your bedtime problem. She has a book out with all kinds of wonderful helpful techniques to deal with kids, and they are loving and kind, and not too hard. I'm sorry, I don't know the name of the book, but I'm sure any bookstore has it, maybe even the library. Hope it works for you.

Good luck at let me know what you hear.Hopefully you will figure it out.I have the same problem and she is 6 now!Only she started sleep in our room because she would stop breathing but she is better now.She has her own room.I totally know the bed hog feeling.Let me know what u find out.Now I am getting a divorce so an would enjoy time alone.I think she has had her time to get used to the move its been couple of months.thanks!Please let me know.

The best thing to do, in my book, is a reward chart. Give her a chart that she can post somewhere that she will see it often. Explain to her what the reward is after so many days of compliance. We have done the same thing with our kids and we see results the quickest this way. The kids get really motivated when they know they can earn something they want. The cool thing is, you don't have to do it forever. Once the kids get in the habit of doing what they are supposed to do, the chart gets forgotten and it's on to the next challenge!
Good luck!
K.

I can't say that I am an expert even though I have three grown children and hopefully I have learned something. Peobably best advice that I can give you is to wtch the tv show Super Nanny. Seriously, she has some of the best tactics that I have ever seen and from what I have seen is that the first time you put your child to bed you tuck her in, kiss her good night etc, you leave the room. Your little girl gets up you walk her back to bed say just good night leave the room shutting the door each time), each time there after she gets up you walk her back but you no longer say anything. This may take a bit and probably get o your nerves but I say try it what do you have to lose right. It certainly has worked on every show that I have seen.
The other thing is she still in a crib or a regular bed? My son and his wife just put their little girl to bed whether she is crying or not. They tell her good night, love on her and then shut the door. She fusses for a bit but she does go to sleep.

I agree with the importance of not SPEAKING to her once bedtime is past.

Hey, I can relate. I have 2 1/2 year old twins. boy/girl and my daughter does the same thing although we have never let her stay up late. Her bed time is between 7 and 8. I put her to bed. do our bedtime routine. and she promptly get out of bed to play. But we have put a child lock on her door handle from the inside, you know the ones that you have to squeeze to open. Now she does her thing, turns on her light, plays, reads her books but she can't get out of her room and when she get tired she gets back in her bed and goes to sleep. when I go to bed I check on her and turn her light off. I don't think there is much you can do about her going to sleep if she doesn't want to, but you can let her know that it is bedtime and she has to stay in her room. good luck.

Mom of five...11 boy,8 boy,6 boy,2 year old twins boy/girl

Are you waking her up when you want her up in the morning? A few cranky days may get her to sleep earlier too. One of my daughters was done with naps at 2 1/2 too. She just no longer needed the sleep.

T.,

My daughter is now 18 but when she was young I made the exact same mistake that you made. I let her sleep with me from the time I brought her home until she was about your daughters age. You might try just putting her back in her bed over and over again. This might take about 3-5 nights of you having to do this but eventually she will get the idea that you mean business. Its really hard to suck it up and follow through with this because it might take hours of you just putting her back in her bed. She will get the idea once she knows that you WILL NOT give in to her. I hope that helps!

I've watched many episodes of SuperNanny and the way she has the parents deal with it goes like this. Do the normal bedtime routine, bath, read a story or two, tuck them in, kiss goodnight and close the door. They will quickly pop out of bed, but this first time,you put them back, say,"Its bedtime, stay in bed." After that you just put them back, no anger, no frustration, and especailly, NO TALKING to them. You repeat this over and over and over and they will cry and yell and pop out of bed, but eventually it will wear them down and they will go to sleep. I watched one episode with a single father and a 5 year old and it took 2 1/2 hours the first time and he was exhausted as well, but he didn't give up and the nanny cheered him on and supported his effort. The next night it only took a little over an hour before the child gave up and got the picture and went to sleep. The 3rd night was even less and soon there no longer was a problem.
We were babysitting our grandson age 4, who had learned to stay in bed from this method, but he knew his parents were out for the evening, so he got out of bed and came into the hallway. I put him back, got a chair and sat outside his door reading. He came out and said, "What are you doing grandma?" I told him I was going to sit her until he went to sleep and he went back to bed and didn't come out again. The main thing the nanny stressed, was after you have put them back the first time, there is no verbal communication with them. Just keep putting them back. They'll catch on. C.

We actually went through this at the same age with our son. It was really difficult and we lost some sleep for a long time, but we stuck with it and now he sleeps great. When the naps went away (a sad thing for a busy mom) it helped with bedtime. We also do a routine(reading, songs, etc). The best thing we discovered was at 7:30pm we stopped whatever we were doing and played a game of his choice until 8:00pm. Then we did one story, a song and prayers and then down for bed. Many nights we stood silently in his room until he fell asleep, only speaking with him to say, "no, it is time for bed" and putting him back in his bedand a bath. Good luck and keep us updated!

Yes....the answer is simple and requires patience and stubborness on your part.

Set a tiem when she is to go to bed. say 8:00p.m.
at 7:30 tell her 30 mintues to bed. Go thru yoru routine washing, brushing....books.

Put her in bed..quitely sing, calm her down. say good night.
Every time she comes out walk back to bed. DO not get angry, simply walk her back to bed. Do this every time it may take 10 nights in a row but always take her back to bed. If she comes in during the night take her back to bed immediately, calmly. Do not waiver or stop cause you're tired. I promise she will get into a routine of staying in bed. You must be stubborn and stick to it.
Good luck

What I did to transistion was to lie down with my child in their bed. I had a little bedtime ritual - read a story, then lights out, their head on my arm & quietly sing prayers & songs until they fell asleep. Then out to my own bed. If they woke up, directed them back to their bed, stayed w/ them til back asleep (maybe rubbing their back, humming, etc.). (Usually back to sleep w/in minutes in the middle of the night wakings.)

Eventually, them having the lie down for 45 mins when the chld was initially going to bed became less & less, til now they just go to bed with a quick kiss & hug.

Another huge tip is to get a pet - kitten/dog - that comes in to snuggle with the child when they go to bed.That makes it REALLY easy.

C.

Hello my name is Jenny. And I have the same problem. Everytime I put my 13 month old baby girl in her bed she will freak out in 30 mins. And once I put her in our bed she is totally fine... This has been going one the last 2 months. So I know how you feel. And I'm not really sure what to do either. So if anyone has any suggestions for me that would be great. Thank you.

My newly 7 year old son has been waking up in the night for a while now. He says that he has nightmares. We know of two movie characters that he is affected by. We try to ask him questions that don't scare him, but that prompt him to talk about why he wakes up. I know your daughter is younger, but communication is so important. Also, talking about fears that you may have and how you deal with them could be healing for all of you. My son is a bed hog, too, but if he sleeps...and wakes up for school (1st grade), I guess I can look toward the light at the end of the tunnel--I will probably miss him sleeping with us when he is 15!!!!

~L.

We had this problem with 4 year old when he was about 18 months to 2 years because we shared a room with him and he was always rocked to sleep. We saw an episode of the Nanny one time and she had one of the parents put the children to bed and then sit on the floor next to his bed. You don't look at the child, you sit looking in a completely different direction. When your daughter starts to get out of bed, put her right back without saying a word. You may have to do it more than 10 times on the first night. She will cry and pitch a fit, but after doing it for a week she should go down better for your. It worked for us in a little over a week. We haven't had a problem since (unless he sick). Then, we usually have to put him back once or twice. You should check out the SuperNanny's website. She has some great ideas. Good luck and remember to be consistent!

Hi, I am a mom of three 10,8,and 6. I am always looking for new idea's for this as well.
I just saw this on SuperNanny last week. I am doing this as well... My daughter is 6 and still getting in the bed. This has been working though. Reading stories or what not before its time to get in the bed. Once time for bed, let her know this is bedtime and put her to bed. The first time she gets out, let her know its bed time. The second time and there after DON'T SPEAK TO HER just put her back in the bed. You will probably be doing this for a while before she gets it but she will w/your determination.
On the show the single dad had to do this for over 2hrs the first night, after that night it got shorter and shorter. He finally got sleep and his own bed back.
We have gotten our bed back until early morning, but instead of picking her up or getting out of bed we tell her to go back to her bed. This usually works.
Good luck and I hope this helps!

I would put her to bed and stay up until she's asleep. Each time she gets up, immediately put her back and tell her it's bed time the first 2 or 3 times, and after that, put her right back without talking to her. Do this ALL NIGHT until she stopps getting up. It may take a few hours initially, but sooner or later she will take you seriously. You will have some late nights for a few nights, but it will pay off. Letting her play in her room or sleep with you is going to teach her that she is in control - not you. And that is the last thing you need: a toddler who bosses you around. She needs to understand that YOU make the rules. If you keep it up for a few nights, eventually she will learn that when she is put to bed, she needs to stay there. Then you will be able to enjoy your evening with your husband, which is SO important.

Hi T.,
I had to LOL when I read your request for help, because I also have a 2 yo daughter (born May 2005) and have never really given her a set bed time. My husband gets home around 8pm and we have late dinners and he enjoys seeing her when he gets home from work... we usually all get to bed around 11pm. My daughter's day bed (which converted from a crib) has always been in our room as her bedroom is not on the same floor as our room, but she always falls asleep in our bed and then I transfer her into her bed so that I can try to get a little sleep comfortably.

My daughter usually sleeps in until anywhere from 9:30 a.m. to 10:30 a.m. which allows me to get some of my personal & work related stuff done once my husband leaves for work at 7:20 p.m. (I'm a stay at home mom with my own photography business).

I know we need to get out of this routine and move her bedtime earlier (for her own sake) as she will need to be adjusted to getting up early for school some day soon. And I listen to all the ways you are trying to get your daughter to sleep early... I've tried once to put my daughter to sleep earlier (reading her a bedtime story x2, sitting next to her bed), but she just had so much energy and didn't want to go to bed. There are times when she does fall asleep early when she misses her naptime. But, for the most part she ends up staying awake with the grown ups and seems to be just fine with that... I know as a parent though, that I must break her from this routine and start getting her to bed earlier.

Anyway... I don't have any "real" advice and just wanted to let you know that you're not alone.

Best of Luck!
S.