You know the rest. I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years and I have come to the end of my rope. Our relationship has not been the best. No one in my family likes him. And I've found myself stuck in the middle of disputes. My six year old daughter calls him daddy (biological father is deceased). I told him what I need/want out of this relationship (eliminate the female friends, time, more respect, and more help with the house). I thought this was reasonable and should not start a debate. I've asked for suggestions how to rekindle the flame in our relationship and make it better and got nothing. I've expressed a few times, I no longer want to be with him. Now, he wants to give suggestions. I think about taking him back, but then he'll do something to remind me why i broke up with him. I am a strong believer in family and that if you really love and care for someone, you'll do whatever it takes to make your relationship work. Should i keep my head to the sky or try to work things out?
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I feel you need to do what puts you in 'joy' and makes you happy as this is your heart that could break the most. Yes, your son will be hurt also, but if you have family around, including great friends then he will have ideal male role models that will not let him down.
I fear if you let him back in, he will only do things for a short time, and then it would be back to what caused the issues in the first place.
You are right to believe in your family and your friends! Do what keeps you happy and vibrant! (When we do this, our desires are met faster!) ;)
Hope you keep your happiness! You know you deserve it! :)
It sounds like you have already made the right decision in your heart and your gut.
Love must be tough.
Swallow deep, make a decision, and stand firm.
YOu need to do what is right IN THE LONG RUN!
Somethings never change - not for long anyway.
I was in a similar situation, I faxed a letter about it to Dr. Laura Sleshinger (sp?). She called me back on my cell phone! I about fell out of my chair!
She said if you want to end it (your decision) stop answering the phone, don't answer the door. If it is going to end - make it a dead stop! There is no other way but to keep living the way you are living. blessings and strength to you.
If you don't have any children together - press on.
You have made some reasonable requests - although the no female friends bothers me - I have male friends.
Basically - you've made your decision. You don't want to be with him... I can tell you from first hand experience - staying with a guy your family doesn't like will only lead to more fights and heartache...they are seeing something you are only beginning to see.
Instead of dragging it out - tell him to leave TODAY. No bones about it...
IF you loved him and HE loved YOU - this wouldn't be an issue...however, it is and deep down in your heart you know you aren't getting what you want and need out of the relationship and he's not giving you the respect and love you deserve....MOVE ON.
From what you have said I feel you only have him around because your son calls him daddy. You need to cut the tie and move on. If he is not willing to change and you can see this already. You are aware. So now you need to move one disconnect and do what you think you should do next. Remeber your priorities and what comes first. If you think you can stay friends with him for your son good but if you get too much emotions than maybe not. The universe works the way it works follow your gut and the way you feel. Everything works out the way it should. Remember it is what it is. Hope I helped have a good one!
The good thing about not being married is that you have the option to put YOURSELF first. Choose what is best for you and don't look back. I do not believe sticking with a man that doesn't make you happy is good for YOU but I realize when there is a child involved it gets sticky. There will be a better man for you and a better father for your daughter, but you should pray every day for God to help you find him.
I know from experience that breaking up is hard to do and that you always second-guess your choice. But I have found a man that is loving, hard-working, compassionate and now a great father because I didn't settle for less. You can too!
Hi T.,
You need to let him go! He will continue to behave the way he always has. Put yourself & your child first. If nobody in your family likes him, then there is a problem, these are the people who love you & would not steer you wrong. It will be hard on you & your child, but over time & with God's strength you will get over it and find the man that you two both deserve. It sounds like you have great friends and family who will support you in any decision. Best wishes to the both of you! (Also, I saw that you wanted to make some xtra money. I have an awesome opportunity, if you would like to hear about it. If so, email me at ____@____.com) God Bless!
