My 3 year old son is just that a 3 year old boy. He has his good days and he has bad days. The director of his school asked if she could use a highchair to keep him in time out. I guess "normal" timeout is not working. Am I crazy for thinking that a highchair should not be use as a restraint to hold a child in time out???? I guess I have strong reason to feel this way. When my son was 8 months old my husband was making our son breakfast early morning and ended up having a heart attack right there in the kitchen. My son was stuck in his high chair from about 8am till about 4pm in the afternoon! Anyone have suggestions? Right know I have taken away TV he is a Diego and Einstein fanatic. But what if that does not work.
No way!! If she has come up with that idea.. who knows what else she has thought of doing or already has done. What daycare is this???
No way!!!! Under no circumstances! You should remove him from that day care. If they suggest that and asked whose to say what they do without your permission. Your son is acting out for a reason you need to get to the bottom of it.
My son is 3 and the only way we can get him to stay in timeout is buckling him in the highchair. He is VERY strongwilled, nothing like my 1st son, so it did seem a little extreme at first when I first heard of it, but it's worked. The daycare doesn't have anything personal against you or your son, but they are trying to control him and avoid others getting hurt.
I'm sorry to hear about your husband, that has to have been a horrible experience, but since he was only 8 months at the time, he may not even remember.
NO way! There are lots of methods to correct behavior besides punishment. My daughter (she turned 4 in October)did not respond to timeouts and is very strong willed, often even refusing to sit in timeout, she will try you on everything. She was having a difficult time in daycare and I had to change her because the teacher did not know how to handle her. She was being asked to sit in timeout practically all day for one reason or another.
I tell you this because changing her daycare was the best thing possible for her. At this new school her behavior has improved 1000% and she will now sit in timeouts, as they are not used so often. This new school focuses on encouraging the child and making them feel better about themself. Constant verbal reinforcement for good behavior, constant re-direction on inappropriate behavior and lots of hugs and kind words. Although they are very set with their rules and inappropriate behavior is not allowed, time-outs are used last. She loves going to school now when before she hated it. Her behavior has improved at home as well.
Check out: http://www.positivediscipline.com/
It gives you a different way to look at problem behavior and how to work to correct it.
Please look into a new school for him, the teachers have such an effect on a childs development since they have them for so many hours, often more than even the parent. Ask the new school specific questions about how they would handle certain recurring behaviors. If their answer is always timeout, timeout, keep looking! Not sure what area you live in but I would really recommend my daughter's school, they have been wonderful!
Good luck!
absolutely NO, especially with you having flashbacks with your husband's heart attack...I would not want my child restrained for hours, are you crazy!...
Hello no!! No way jose!!! This director is a lawbreaker, no telling what is going on that is not according to the guidelines besides this.
Your child will get the wrong ideas about his high chair. What she is suggesting is totally "restraint" and that should not be allowed.
Take your kid out of there if you can, tell this person what you think about that suggestion in no uncertain terms and document now. Write down date and time of this offer and when you spoke and what was said. You are a smart cookie. You are not crazy. She is. (recognize)
so sorry about your hubby's heart problem, will be praying for ya. Sometimes we get a subtle warning first, like the highchair for time out. Proceed with caution.
Jen
No and look for another school
No, that is not okay. It is state law that punishment cannot be tied to food (among other things). Your son knows what a high chair is for and will associate his punishment with food.
I would never strap my children in a highchair for punishment.... yes take away his things..... you are the parent a 3yr old cannot run you!!
a physical restraint isnt safe, what if he gets wiggly and tips it over, or hurts him self some way. Someone woul dhave to sit with him the whole time and then no need for the high chair. plus how long is she putting a 3 yr old in time out that she needs to physical restrain him? Its like a minute a year...
and I am so sorry about your hubby that would freak me out too!
If you use a highchair to feed your child, I would ask the Daycare to NOT use it as a method of punishment. He could associate high chairs with negative feelings and be completely against getting in one at all.
The notion that anyone would be cruel as to strap a kid into a highchair for their time out punishment, especially since your child has already survived a traumatic event of watching his father have a heart attack and being stuck in the high chair for 8 hours, is disgusting. It makes me so sad for your son.
The point of time out is to remove the child from the situation. They can do that in a number of ways without having to tie him to a chair. Even just using a play yard (the gates, not the playpen) can be an easy option for a child who won't sit in a chair.
Please don't let these people re-traumatize your baby boy!
You are absolutely not crazy. Highchair is for eating, just like you wouldn't put a child in their bed as timeout. They will associate eating and sleeping with being bad. If I were you, I would look for another school. What do they consider "normal" timeout? They could just put him in a corner until he gets the idea. Oh, please look for another school. To even suggest a highchair, there is something wrong with that person.
No. no and more NO.
what kind of a Director IS this?
any EARLY EDUCATION training????
your story alone is enough to say NO.
next: your son is THREE.
no need for RESTRAINT.
mama, go read up on some parenting ideas/skills and read up about child development
see if the library has anything by Dr.Sears
as in www.askdrsears.com
and read
1-2-3 magic
and read the info (browse around!) on this site:
http://joanneaz_2.tripod.com/positivedisciplineresourcece...
YOU are the MAMA. YOU are in charge! not necessarily the daycare- YOU work WITH them.
keep us posted!
