Seeking Moms Who Have Adopted Infants

We adopted a beautiful 10 month old from China what a wonderful experience and the most perfect little girl! She is 18 months old now!

I am one of eight adopted children. My parentas have adopted at young ages and have taken in foster children. I haven't adopted any children but if you want feedback on what's it's like to be adopted or what it was like to see my siblings adopted and family and friends feelings about I'm willing to share my experiences.
Good luck with the process

Oh, have I got feedback and advice! We have adopted one baby (2 2/12 weeks old) and now, after 2 2/12 years, are almost in the legalization stage for another who we've had for almost a year (he came to us at 6 weeks old.) We've had a wonderful, easy, thrilling, emotional experience. Let me also say that we did domestic adoptions, were very clear about the need to adopt children with little "risk" associated with them staying with us forever, and were open to children of any ethnic backround.

I'll tell you a little about us: After years of preparing to be a mom (like since I was twelve...loved to babysit, etc.) I had the unfortunate experience of "unexplained infertility." I/we went through all the tests and we tried invitro-fertilization five times.

I don't know what your experience has been, but I know that there are many reasons to adopt. We had discussed adopting to increase our family size even before we got married, so the decision to adopt to start our family, given our situation, was a relatively natural one.

Regardless of your situation, I wholeheartedly endorse this process. That being said, I have heard some horror stories about both domestic and international adoption. I count my blessings every day!

With regards to any hesitancy, I can honestly say that our adopting has made me feel 150% like a mom. I questioned that before I got to hold my baby for the first time. But after that SECOND I first touched him, there was no doubt in my mind that he is MINE, MINE, MINE, and I knew that I would do anything for him. It's an attachment that grows stronger day by day. (now I'm crying!) :) And with the second, it's the same!

There are times, of course, when I still mourn the fact that the two loves of my life didn't come from my body, but they clearly came from the union between me and my husband, because the birth mothers would not have picked us had we not been who we are as a couple.

I would love to talk to you more in detail, if you are interested. I love sharing the wonder of becoming a mother in this way.

Good luck, my friend. Email me back if you want to ask any specific questions. I have done this for many women/couples and welcome that chance to help you in your process!

H.

hello,
my husband and i adopted 2 years ago going through all the paperwork the house inspection and the waiting for a child is worth all that you go through. We adopted and aferican american child the wait was only 3 -6 months and a white child can be up to to years. we chose to adopt an black child because they need a family too. yes their maybe a few conflicks with friends and family but they will just have to accept it. Yes we had a few problems in the begining but he is our son no matter what his skin color is. I even started my own playgroup in our town once a month so all the surrounding adoptive families childern can play together i have 5 families that attend so about 9 children in all. If you need any help or advice feel free to contact me.

Hi,
I am an adoptive mom of 2 beautiful boys. My oldest son is now 3.5. He came to us at 11 months old and was officially adopted by the age of 2.5. We were also placed with a 6 month old boy two weeks ago. We have a long road ahead of us with the legal process but hope for the best. Without knowing your specific questions, I will say this:
I can't imagine a bond being any stronger with biological children, I feel like I gave birth to both of them and receiving "the phone call" that you were chosen to be parents is the best thing in the world!!! Best of luck while you wait!

Hi A.
I have two adopted children from Ethiopia. My son has been home for two years and was adopted at five months old. My daughter has been home for one month (on Sunday!!) and is 18 months old. I love talking about their adoptions so feel free to ask me anything. I live in Tolland, Ct.
Good luck with everything
Cathy

We have adopted two beautiful boys as infants. We met my oldest son (who is now 9) when he was 12 hours old. He was placed with us for adoption @ 4 days old. My younger son, now 4, was five weeks old when he was placed with us. My husband and I love our sons and really feel that they were meant to be with us.

I am not sure what your questions are, but please feel that you can e-mail me with specific questions/concerns. Adoption is a wonderful way to build a family.

S.

My husband and I have two sons who we adopted at birth and we also are in the process of adopting a third right now. Feel free to email me, if you'd like to connect, I'm completely open with our experiences.

A.,

We have two adopted sons from South Korea. Our first son came home to us at 4months and our second at 15months.

Please feel free to email me at ____@____.com

L.

Hi! I think it is wonderful that you are going to adopt!!! My husband and I adopted our son (turning 3 in May) when he was an infant. It was an emotional roller coaster at times, but well worth it! Our son was born 13 weeks early, so that added an entirely different aspect to things. He is a healthy, happy, great almost three year old now. Don't stress about the home visits - the social worker just needs to get to know you, see your home, and get a feel for the enviornment in which your child will be raised. Never having had a biological child, I can't make the comparison, but I can tell you that I couldn't imagine loving my son any more or feeling any closer or bonded to him even if I had given birth. Please feel free to email me with any specific questions - I would be more than happy to answer them. Good luck!

My partner and I were in the delivery room when our child was born a year ago. It was truly a blessing. While it's a happy ending, we did have our share of heartaches along the way. Be prepared that not every situation presented to you may work out. One of the hardest lessons we learned was not to tell everyone immediately when a match was made. The untelling was really hard. Good luck.

Blessings of love, luck and happiness with the adoption process!!

Hi A.,

My husband and I have just completed our 10 week course to become licensed to adopt through our state. After much research, we came to the conclusion that this was best for us cost-wise and that it may offer the least waiting period for a child. It has been quite intrusive with LOTS of paperwork, but if the end result is having a child to love, it is all worth it! We are also awaiting our first home visit. Though I can not share any experiences of having a young child in our home YET, I do wish you luck on your exciting adventure! Feel free to share your stories as you go forward through this adoption. I will as well.

L. O.

Hello A.,

I hope you are well. I do not have children yet, but would like to begin the adoption process as well. Fortunately, I have a neighbor who has gone through it already so once I sit down with them (which will be next week) I would be happy to share any insight that they provide.

I'm quite excited about adopting although I'm sure it will be emotionally taxing at times. I will keep you in my thoughts and I will be in touch.

Kindly,

CO

My husband & I adopted domestically, got our son at just 5 days. He's a year old now, and a joy. We are in the process (paperwork and visits and fingerprints etc again)of adopting #2! Good luck. email me with questions.

Hi A.,

I think it is wonderfult that you and your husband are looking to adopt a child. I am an adoptee, adopted at 3 months old, and have had the most wonderful family and upbringing. I plan on beginning the adopting process myself in 2 years (I'm a planner). I wish you all the best, and if you have any questions from the adoptee-side, please don't hesitate to reach out to me.

Good luck!
M.

We adopted a 6 mo. old healthy and happy boy who is now 2 yrs. young. It's a wonderful experience and I am happy for you. There are so many children in need of families. We went through DCYF in RI and recommend it highly. We will be searching for a little sister for our son soon. Best of Luck.

As far as advice, just be yourself and let the social worker know what you are looking for as far as family fit. They may ask if the primary caregiver will work, the use of day care.... She will observe your home and interaction w. spouse or significant other if they are present for the initial visit. He/she will be back monthly to observe the child/children if it is a multiple or sibling's placement.

My husband and I are also beginning the process. I do have one biological daughter that took me 3 years on 3 trials of Clomid and two laparoscopies to blow out my tubes. She will be eight this weekend. We have been trying for two years with no luck. I have endo and do not ovulate regularly but still have periods. I had an appt with a social worker twice at their office in N. Andover. quit grueling. The paperwork is incredible and its very intrusive, but will go through almost anything to adopt. We have not had a homestudy yet and will have a scheduled time for her to view our house and deem it safe for a child. I would love to connect with other people who is going through this process so we could have pow wows (so to speak) and lend support.