R., I'm so sorry to hear about the rough time your toddler is going through. No mother likes to feel lost and worried and agonize over their child's uncertain medical issues. You are not alone sweetie.
1st, I noted from a previous post of yours, that your toddler was on long-term antibiotics for reflux. Has he had other gastro issues, such as constipation, diarrhea, foul-smelling stools, bloating, gas? Was he a colicky baby
2nd, how long ago was the heart murmur detected? Had an EKG or sonogram of his heart?
3rd, is he reaching his milestones?
My youngest was born w/ a heart murmur (atrial septal defect) & developed anemia at age 3, totally unrelated I'm told & TRULY believe, as she has OTHER health issues as well. Shockingly & despite my best efforts to provide her the best medical care & early intervention, it took 2 YEARS for 4 specialists to determine the cause of her anemia!!! THUS MY #1 REASON TO REPLY TO YOUR REQUEST. No mother OR child should have to go through this.
Yes, for many children, ferrous sulfate drops, bioavailable children's multivitamins and iron-rich foods are the simple solution. However, given the long-term reflux, heart murmur and anemia, I believe your toddler's situation merits immediate attention, as physical and mental development are CRITICAL from ages 3-5 - most importantly brain development, which can't be recovered or reversed if there is a great loss of iron (don't know how low your child's is).
My child went through & suffered 2 years of anemia, physical & developmental loss, and TOO MANY needle sticks and invasive procedures to count while all along I kept saying, "I THINK SHE HAS FOOD ALLERGIES." After 2 yrs. of feeding her red meat & ferrous sulfate on her spec's advice, she was FINALLY tested for food allergies. She's ALLERGIC to BEEF, EGGS & COW'S MILK - CAUSE OF ANEMIA!!!
Although she was "neg" for wheat, I have found that a gluten-free diet works BEST for her. My recommendation is that you have your child tested for food allergies (RAST) ASAP.
I have amassed quite a personal library on food allergies, as well as numerous books in the health field, and I could make a recommendation, as I have been in the health, wellness & nutrition industry for 17 years. If you'd like more info about my child's condition or an update or just need someone to talk with, please feel free to send me an email. Take care R. & God Bless you and yours. ~~ M.