Saying Prayer/Grace in Montessori Classroom

Updated on October 08, 2010
R.F. asks from Plano, TX
7 answers

My daughter went to a birthday party a couple weeks ago and all the kids (school mates) at the table started to say what I guess would be called 'grace" - "G-d is good, G-d is great, thank you for the food on my plate". They learned it from her Montessori school. I am not against religions - please don't interpret me as one who will sue for saying the Pledge of Allegiance!! But, I am a little uncomfortable with this. We have a school conference in a couple of weeks. My daughter is happy there and she only has one more year to go before Kindergarten. I know there are a varity of ethnicities in the school, so I can't be the only one who may notice this. Is it appropriate to bring it up at the conference or just drop it? I don't want to come across as anti anything, but they did have me come in to teach about Hanukkah last year, so I feel they do respect all religions. I'd rather them focus on Spanish and computer skills :)

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So What Happened?

Yeah - from the answers I've received, I totally get your point. I'm not offended, and I suppose a moment to reflect IS a good thing. I guess I'm just looking to much into it!! Thanking G-d is more open to discussion. Thank you all for your responses - I really am open minded (maybe too much for my own good!). Sorry if I seemed 'snobby'. It actually took me a while to even consider bringing this up. EDIT: I took out the 'secular' part - I was looking for another term and totally missed it. Geez. Not my day today :)

More Answers

G.T.

answers from Modesto on

Sorry, cant' help ya there. I'm all for prayer in school. Kids need to be exposed to the possibility that there is a "higher power" because they may not learn that at home. It then becomes a thought provoking issue for the parent and child to discuss what they believe is really out there. The world is diverse and the more we get exposed to the more we learn about ourselves. This would instigate a conversation between you and your daughter and what you think about saying grace. She can then choose to close her eyes and pray or just to respectfully sit there while others do it. It's about respecting the differences not shoving it down our throats.... try to look at it that way and it doesnt seem so extreme.

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C.M.

answers from Austin on

Bring it up! I am a Christian person who is vehemently opposed to prayer in school. (Unless it is a private, religious school). If one religion is being presented, I would make sure that the school is making an effort to show ALL religions. Maybe alternate with a Hindu blessing or a Jewish ritual. Just having "God" is not appropriate.

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B.

answers from Augusta on

I'm not sure how saying grace is secular.
If it bothers you bring it up. But I don't think taking 20-30 seconds out of their day to thank God for their food is going to take away from their Spanish or computer skills.
Teaching about religion is a social studies or cultural lesson.

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E.R.

answers from Chicago on

If this is a Montessori school it is a private school and not subject to the separation of church and state. That said, you are paying a lot for your child to go there and it is NOT a religious school for a specific denomination. If they are giving equal attention to different spiritual traditions ( you said they had you come in to speak about Hanukkah) maybe you just need to find out exactly what traditions are being taught and how they are being shown to the kids. Saying a simple thank you for food to God fits in with many religious customs and traditions and cultures, so maybe they felt like that would be un-offensive to most parents and families there.

While I do not agree with prayer in school per se- I do agree that this is a good time to talk to your daughter about what that actually meant. Many kids will just parrot things and not really understand what they're saying. You could also, as Grandma TM suggest, talk to her about silently reflecting or just being thankful for her food, whatever YOUR family believes in and is comfortable with.

If it's a real concern for you, bring it up at the next parent's meeting or speak with the director about it and find out if this is a regular custom or how it fits into the curriculum or whatever. The important thing is to be involved and be mindful and have your child think about things, IMO- not to just blindly repeat things because everyone else is. This is a teaching moment, no matter WHAT you believe in! :)

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R.C.

answers from Salt Lake City on

If you have a problem with your child saying grace then I feel you should bring this up at the conference. Letting it eat away at you is not going to assist you or your child.

Having said that, why do you have a problem with it? If you were asked to come in and speak about Hanukkah last year then I assume you follow a religion. Which would mean you believe in God or a "higher-being" who could be called God .

Saying grace takes a minute or less, I doubt very much that this will in anyway influence your child's ability to understand or accept your religion.

Having now reread your posting I am now very puzzled why you think saying grace is secular - this meaning non-religious.....

I wish you the best of luck in coming to a positive conclusion.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

The Montessori preschool/kindergarten my son went to was very multicultural, both the students and the teachers. Every holiday that came up, they'd discuss different cultures and the different celebrations and I learned a lot myself. I can't recall any prayers at meal time, but I imagine some kids give thanks at meals and some kids don't.
I thought 'secular' meant non-religious, and saying grace would pretty much be the exact opposite of that.

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L.M.

answers from Dallas on

Check the research on our Founding Fathers. It shows that they never intended on a separation of church and state the way it is today. They did NOT want the establishment of a national denomination - like having us all be Baptists or all Catholics. The phrase is not even mentioned in the Constitution or the Declaration of Independence. It was first introduced by Thomas Jefferson in an exchange of letters between with the Baptist Association of Danbury, CT shortly after he became president. I believe it has only been since the case of Everson v. Board of Education (1947) that the Supreme Court declared, "The First Amendment has erected a wall between church and state." This is unfortunate since this was not the intent of our Founding Fathers.

Did you know that the first Congress authorized the printing of Bibles for the use of schools! Why would they do that if they wanted separation of church and state? And prayer and the reading of the Bible continued in public schools until only a few short decades ago! We've gone downhill very fast in a very short period of time. You can make a good case for showing that this has happened ever since we took prayer and the Ten Commandments out of public schools. Prisons have exploded up to 800%, Jr. high kids are having sex, drugs are rampant, teen suicide is up, etc.

Think of this: What purpose do kids have in life if they can't answer the big questions of life such as (1) how did we get here? (2) what purpose is there in living? and (3) by what standard is right & wrong? If they believe there is no God, then we are reduced to believing that we came from premordial soup somehow or were seeded from aliens from outer space. Do you see what I mean?

Be grateful when you see kids in school bowing their heads acknowleding a higher power and thanking God for their food. This is what the first Pilgrims did! Let's hope they don't take that out of our kids' textbooks!

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