Repeat C-section or VBAC?

Vaginal births after C-sections are standard in Germany (where I am right now). It's healthier for mom and baby. Go for it!

I had my second son and c-section when my first was 1-1/2. He took it in stride. I made him "my helper" in everything and he owned the job!!! I would sit to hold and hug him and we never had that issue of resentment with the new baby. Now, my husband was able to be very active in caring for him, so I can't say how much that helped.
Also, my second scar is not as nice as my first. There is a big dip in my belly where the incision has been made, twice now. AND I'm due for my third 2/2/11. Ugly tummy, here I come!

You have lots of answers already, but will add my 2-cents' worth! I had to have an emergency C-section with our first daughter. Then with our 2nd, our son, I chose to have a VBAC. That all went well, however, I healed up about the SAME with the C-section as I did with the VBAC..., so with our (surprise TWINS), I had to choose what I wanted to do. Since the C-section really seemed no different than the VBAC...well, I chose to have a C-Section with my twins (3 & 4). The doc said with twins that you can go through labor and deliver one baby vaginally, then there is so much room in there that the other baby can flip around and you end up having C-Section anyway, so, I went with C-Section the last time around....It really was EASY PEASY LEMON SQUEEZY!!!! And a quicker recovery with the second C-Section! And now all 4 of mine are all grown up!! :-)

My DS is four and I had repeat c-section in September. I was the same and my son was breech so I had to have a c-section and after talking with my OB I decided to have a c-section the second time around. I didnt have any complications and I felt like my recovery time was quicker the second time around. Probably because I knew my limitations and didnt push myself to do things I knew I wasnt ready for. My son didnt react any way but positive, from the moment my DD arrived he has taken the BB role very seriously, lol, and been nothing but helpful in his own little way. But I rarely ever carried him around from the time he was two. I just explained to him about my tummy and he understood. He actually wanted to see the "owie on my tummy" he thought it was "cool"
You can always still have him snuggle up with you while you are feeding the baby, thats what we did. Are you having any family come in? Or is your husband taking some time off?.. My husband got two weeks Daddy Maternity Leave and we had at least one family member staying with us for the first two months so when my DS needed that extra special time they could either provide it or tend to the baby while I had that one on one time.
Congratulations...

Check ut some websites about the risks of c-sections vs VBACs. www.ican-online.org is a great one and there are others out there. I wuold consider carefully the medical risks and benefits of each moreso than how your son will feel-- he will have a lot of adjustments to make in his life either way.

I will warn you- I am a nurse-midwife who works in a busy OB practice and we offer VBAC but the doctors very often sway people into repeat c-sections for their own convenience so be sure you have truly found a supportive provider if you make that choice.

Also, insurance does cover VBAC. In fact it is actually their preference because it is cheaper and complications are less likely. They used to require all women attempt VBAC but after some patient dissatisfaction they changed their policies.

Well, reading this has made me doubt my own decision lol I had a c-section over 3 yrs ago with my twins and am due end of March and am going with a c-section again. I figured, I already have a scar and I'm terrified of it tearing if I tried to do vaginally. The recovery time does suck and of course being a major surgery it does involve more risk... I guess both have pros and cons. My girls will be almost 4 so I don't have to worry about lifting them much I don't think. I think I talked myself back into being sure about my decision :) Good luck!

I had a VBAC with my second baby and the recovery was soooooo easy! I was up & around in the hospital! I was able to snuggle & be with my 3 year old as well. I can't remember if I carried her or not, but she wasn't lacking from attention!

Good luck with your decision and enjoy your babies!

I am having this same dillema right now. I had a c-section with my first due to distress. With my second I wish now I would have opted to try for a VBAC, that would have meant switching doctors and hospitals and driving out of town for all appointments, but if I could do it all over again I would. My husband and I are trying for #3 and hoping to find someone who will do a VBA2C, but it's not looking promising. My 2nd c-section had some complications and the recovery was alot harder than the first. My son was only 17 months when I had baby #2, so it was hard for him, but Daddy was around alot to do the carrying of our toddler. I think your son is old enough to understand that you cannot carry him after the birth for a few weeks. I would think long and hard about this, you don't want to end up regretting not trying for a VBAC. Good Luck!

I was very lucky and got to do 3 vbacs. If your health and the baby's health are fine, you are confident in your medical care I would go for it.
Good health to you both whichever route you go.

Whether you have a vaginal birth or a surgical birth you shouldn't lift anything heavier than your new baby.
A second surgical birth carries much more risk than a VBAC, but most doctors aren't willing to "allow" the VBAC. Yeah, I put allow in quotes for a reason. Even if you decide on a repeat surgery and change your mind at the last minute, you don't have to show up for the surgery, you also don't have to sign papers for it. They can't cut you without your permission! If you decided at the last minute to let your body birth your baby, but haven't switched hospitals, you can labor at home for most of it, go in when your nearly done, and when they say you need to sign papers for a surgery, ask them how your baby is doing, as well as how you are doing. If you're both doing well, tell them you aren't signing anything.

Since your hubby has had recent surgery, it is wise to consider ditching the surgery plan. If you dollars labor, I recommend getting a doula. A doula can help you get through your labor happily and easily and can assist your hubby in whatever level of involvement he wishes to have.

I had 2 C sections and my son was 16 mmonths when I deliverd 4 months ago. I was difficult not being able to lift him but I would just have people lift him or me or sit down with him. Goodluck! Very glad I did it thay way. I was able to schedule my second one and have my son spend the night with grandparents so we didn't have to worry.

Dear M. S,
I have had two c sections nothing to worry,you have long time yet and could
explain and talk about the baby to come. I'm sure he will understand. You could say he will have a baby sister and that you will need his help too. and then he could play with his little sister talk to her care for her etc. You will not have any problem in fact he will help you.so please don't worry and take care everything will be fine,God bless you.

P.

My first was also c-section because she was breech. Three years later I had my second daughter via vbac. What a difference! C-section took 6 weeks to recover. Vbac took 2. C-section had me shuffling instead of walking for a long time, left me with no sensation along my scar & my abdominal muscles have never been the same. With vbac I was walking the same day with no pain. Vbac did leave me with a small tear that required one stitch. No biggie. I would choose vbac again in a heartbeat!

I had a repeat c-section 3.5 weeks ago. My son is 3.5 years old and weighs 40 lbs - I haven't been able to pick him up for months (basically since halfway through my pregnancy). He is just too heavy. He isn't specifically upset that I'm holding his sister and not him; however, he is just upset in general that she takes up so much of my time - mostly because I am nursing 8-9 times per day.

I wasn't really a candidate for VBAC so I never really had to make the decision. My c-section recovery was much easier the second time around.

Your son is going to have a lot of adjustment issues no matter what. I honestly don't think that being able to hold him or not will make that big of a difference. If you spend time snuggling with him and holding him in your lap, that will likely be enough.

Congrats on baby # 2!
K.
http://oc.citymommy.com - the best place to connect with OC moms!

HI M.,
I recently gave birth to my daughter 2 months ago. I also have a 3 1/2 year old in which I gave birth to by emergency C-Section. I was planning on a vaginal birth with my second, but she decided to continually flip back and forth and would not stay in the head down position. I also ended up having a C-Section with her. Yes, I was extremely disapointed. Now, I will never know what it is like to have a vaginal birth.
My daughter was very excited to meet her sister (I have been preparing her for the babies arrival for a long time). I was lucky in which my 3 year old did not show any signs of jelousy (in the beggining). She didn't mind when the baby cried, or when I had to get up and change a diaper. From the get go, (once I was physically able) I took her to the grocery store (or any other errand) all by ourselves. I would leave my newborn with my husband. I think it is very important to spend alone time with each child.
I kept telling my daughter (when it came to picking her up) that as soon as my boo boo was gone, I will pick her up and dance with her. The day I did that, she was so happy. She said to me "Good job mommy!!! You picked me up!" It was a beautiful moment. Hopefully, your son will be accepting, and pacient. I recovered fairly quickly from the C-Section, and I do believe that the pain medication helped alot. Motrin worked when I was in the hospital, but I knew when I got home, I was going to need something more powerful. (taking care of the house and 3 year old) I asked for Percoset (spelling?). My doctor didn't want to give it to me because it is a narcotic, but I faught for it because that is what I recieved with my first C-Section and it worked great for me. She gave it to me (finally) and it all worked out.
After a few weeks, my daughter did start showing some signs that something was not right. Normally my daughter was an easy going child who didn't talk back, or argue with me. Then all of a sudden, she was telling me "No" when I asked her to do something, or talking back. It went on for about 3 weeks. I got tough, and put her in time out EVERYTIME, and now she's back to normal. I think I got off fairly easy, and I felt as long as she doesn't "turn" on the baby, I can take whatever she dishes out. Thankfully, it didn't last long. But, I think spending quality time with your son (make the time if you can) will help tramendously.
Good luck, and I wish you a quick and easy delivery. (with a healthy baby!)

Just something to think about--with my first I had a vaginal delivery, I was in labor for 28 hours and 42 minutes and I had a very nasty episiotomy...the recovery was long and painful. It was many months before I did not experience pain during intercourse. With my second I had an emergency c-section. I got to skip the long painful labor. After the surgery I used a compression wrap which helped a lot. I liked the c-section recovery better. I felt better sooner and was really happy that I did not have a wound down there to deal with. So just keep in mind that a vaginal delivery and recovery is not necessarily easier.

I had 2 c-sections. I held my babies.
My Doc said... don't carry anything heavier than your baby.
For my eldest child, per my 2nd c-section.... I just explained to her that I cannot carry her because Mommy has to heal and that is what the Doctor said... I have to take care. She understood just fine. She was almost 4 years old at that time. It was no problem. She did NOT feel "slighted" in any way.
I showed her a 10 pound dumb-bell... I let her carry it. I explained SHE is heavier than that... and the Doctor said I cannot carry anything heavier than that. She understood. I explained I can only carry her baby brother... because he weighs less than that. He was an 8+ pound baby at birth.
AND when I was in my last trimester with my 2nd child... I explained to my eldest that I cannot carry her.... Mommy's tummy was just too big and I don't have the 'strength' to carry her AND baby brother in my tummy. It was fine. She understood. I would just hug her.... instead. It really was no problem.

I opted for a c-section.
My first was an emergency.
My 2nd was planned.

Whatever you decide... make sure that the hospital will do it. And that your Medical insurance will cover a VBAC. Not all insurance will.

BOTH my c-sections... was fine and recovery was super.

All the best,
Susan

2 and half years ago I too had a c section with my son due to baby distress. In september my daughter was born via c section. The doc and I had discussed on numerous occasions of a vback and she knew I was gonna try, but when the time came she was born via c section again due to baby distress. It is very possible to delivery vback just a high risk.
The recovery for me, with the second c section was so much easier than the first. i couldnt do the lifting but I was up and around same day of surgery and felt so much better. I expected it to be the same but I can honestly say it was alot easier than my first c section.
Good luck with what ever you decide!