Religious Pressure- Kids

This is why I have two very large german shepherds. They are very well behaved but when I need some barking they are great! I would have sic'ed her!

Anyone in a place of authority like a "primary president" shouldn't cry when faced with rejection. That's very suspicious.

yowza - LOTS of responses. Short answer. VERY inappropriate no matter what religion or social organization.

Ha ha ha ha! I am from Utah and a Mormon. I will bet you anything that she assumed you were Mormon, too. In Utah, I remember assuming that everyone was a Mormon because in some areas, almost everyone is. She is probably the new primary president and was just trying to make sure that your son didn't feel left out. You need to tell her that you are not LDS and ask to be put on their "do not contact list."

Sorry. I think it is funny. I think she is just clueless and doesn't know how to handle her job yet. I am sure she meant no harm probably doesn't realize how she came across.

Edit: I couldn't resist adding - Mormons believe coffee is bad for your body. However, we don't think coffee-drinkers are evil/going to hell. Teeheeehee! Hilarious! Also, to anyone else angry with Mormons coming to your house. You have to ask to be put on a do not contact list or they will continue. We are not trying to be rude or tell you that you are godless or evil, I promise.

2nd Edit: No, Mormons don't believe that recruiting more members brings us closer to heaven or God. If we never get another person to join the church, it doesn't keep us out of heaven. In case anyone was wondering. . .No we don't practice polygamy and haven't for over a hundred years.

No, you aren't the only one!! I imagine just about every other mom would find this inappropriate. We teach our kids to run from strangers offering rides.

Of course not.
She cannot do that.
She could be a pedophile....
you do not even know her.
She could be a nut.
This is YOUR child.... do not consent to anything to anyone you do not know.
I would put a NO Soliciting sign, on your door.
I would report her.... TO THE POLICE.

I'm literally laughing so hard right now because I can so imagine this and I'm picturing your face as you said that; ''" Um no I dont believe that will be happening"! What did she reply to that is my question!?

Wow! Way out of this world inappropriate! To address your child directly and offer to take them somewhere?

Sounds like she needs a reality check. Fast. I wouldn't even show my child the cd or literature. Kids have no filters for this. Ugh. Marketing to kids, religion-style. (I don't care which religion-- if the parent is the head of the household, why aren't they being addressed first?)

I'm always a bit appalled, personally, when someone comes to the door to sell me on their religion. It's a huge assumption, on their part, that goes beyond rude. If I'm curious about their religion, I will find that particular house of worship and visit myself. A year or so ago, some group came to my door to ask me some "spiritual questions". I was out on the porch with my son and his playmate, and another person out near the street was snapping pictures of us. I made it extremely clear that they *did not* have my permission to take pictues of myself or my son, and to stop. I observed that they did this at every home they visited. Some people have no boundaries, and being privacy-invaders is not how to get people to worship your god.

Sorry 'bout the rant, but I just *hate* this sort of thing!

Ahhhh Mormons, gotta love 'em.

Totally inappropriate on the one hand (I would have done the same thing), and yet *completely* "appropriate" when taken in her context. Meaning that Mormonism is an extremely "community based" religion. Districts, wards, precincts... all kinds of levels of community with "leaders" to keep these groups organized at every level. Tons and tons of sharing and helping (carpooling, classes, edu materials - religious and school-, activities, "barn raising", tutoring, etc.). WITHIN the community itself there is so much give and give that NOT offering and accepting is considered almost the height of rudeness. HOWEVER, people are USUALLY quite adept at not overstepping those bounds when dealing with outsiders. AKA a "taste" of the community is offered to people who on the "maps" either aren't "listed" or are "inactive", but it's usually done in an "ease them into it" / enticing kind of way.

Your door knocker "slipped". She treated you like you were Mormon instead of a potential convert. Half of her tears were probably shame that she "mishandled" you so badly that you didn't instantaneously agree (aka a potential "lost soul"), and half that within the community your saying "Nope" in any way shape or form intimates that there is something VERY wrong/ dangerous/ unsuitable about her as a PERSON.

YOU were completely in your rights and appropriate... she slipped up big time. My guess is that

a) She's very new to the position

b) You will be receiving baked goods (as a form of "apology", remember the 2nd half of the "crying", meaning that she's done something to upset you / make you not trust her or an invitation to _______ dinner, a "group", volunteer opportunity, playdate, etc., or if she feels like she REALLY screwed up, both baked goods AND an invite) in the near future.

OMG the lady is a nut. Make sure you tell your daughter to stay far away from her. My family is religous and we go to church every sunday. I would never press my religion on anyone else. What bothers me more than that though is that she felt it was acceptable to ask your daughter to do something without clearing it with the parent..

I'd call the church and tell them to stay the HELL away from my house. LOL!

What a FREAK! It would not do for me to live in Utah. That's beyond inappropriate -it's invasive, rude and bizarre. Perhaps you should have a very nice plaque made to hang on your door or beside it that reads:

"Please don't get your special underwear in a twist, but we do not accept religious solicitation of any kind -or solicitation in general. Go away and leave us alone. If we decide we want to join your church, you'll see us there!"

I would no longer answer the door. I never do here unless expecting someone. I have no problem looking at a person through the front door to see who it is and then turning around and walking off. In her particular situation, I would tell her to never solicit me or approach my my children again.

Please, not to insult any Mormon or anyone who KNOWS Mormons, but where I live, they come around to ring the bell often. When I was a child my mother (who is devoutly Catholic) would invite them in for tea, sit at the table and respectfully argue with theem for HOURS about how her children were not poor and pathetic and Godless because they were not Mormons. In fact she would try their own tactics on THEM and see if she could've get them to convert to Catholicism.

As an adult opening my OWN door to them, while I have NEVER invited them in my house as my MOTHER did, I do try to treat them with kindness and patience and respect. I try to gracefully say something like, we are very faithful, but are happy being Catholic, have a great day!

:)

I agree with S.H. I have a feeling you were much more polite than I would have been if I had let her get this far. I have a No Soliciting sign but many ignore it or try to argue. To them I just say "No Thank You firmly, politely and boldy than close the door. EVEN if it is mid sentence, I'm not going to be help captive on the basis of common courtesy for someone who may be trying to case my home, and/or figure out my schedule so they can break in later.

P.S. I think you should call your local police also. Let them know what happened just incase this lady isn't who she says she is.

I know a few Mormons, and I think her behaviour would completely creep them out. That was just WIERD. If someone is her supervisor, I would let them know, because she is not leaving a good impression of the church in your neighborhood.

No - you aren't the only one! Make sure that you tell your child that she/he is NEVER to go anywhere with that person!

I probably would have gone off on this church lady - she has some nerve!

If you don't know the lady, it doesn't matter if she's offering to take them to Vatican City and see the Pope.

I grew up in a Baptist church where my grandfather was a minister. I am now and have always been uncomfortable with any religious group that goes "door to door." Granted, I know it is a responsibility of all Christians to share God's word, but I don't want to "invade" someone's home, mainly because I don't want them to invade mine.
The area where I grew up had a very small Jehovah's Witness group and they maybe came by our house 2 times a year. However, my husband's family lives within a large Mormon community. The LDS church is less than a mile from our house. They attended when he was a preteen, but have long since stopped. However, he's still on the "attendance" roll, as are my in-laws.
It is nothing for me to make a run to the grocery store and see the missionaries on their bicycles. We've been married 4 years and the missionaries stop by at least once every 3 months. On the bright side, the male missionaries will not come in the house if my hubby's not home (it's against their rules). We had been nice to them in the past and invited them in, only to hear the same spill we hear every time and politely tell them we are attending a church and have no intention of leaving the church where we are (which is a Baptist church).
The last time they came, I was sick with the stomach flu and my son was cutting his first molars. Needless to say, I felt awful. Hubby wasn't home and they came to the door and started the spill right there on my front porch.
I not so nicely told them I didn't appreciate their persistent efforts to get us to attend the church and called them out on "proselytizing" us, as we had told them several times we were happy where we are. Then I started to gag and the guys realized I was about to puke at their feet. They turned tail and left. That was about 6 months ago and we haven't seen them since.

LOLOLOLOLOL!!!! I don't know if I'm just in a giddy mood today, but this is the funniest thing I've ever heard. It sounds like a scene from a movie.

Of course that's not appropriate. But it does make for a funny story.

That's the most ridiculous thing I've read all day!

It is completely inappropriate. Mormons who are offended and take this as bashing need to stop and think about the fact that this happens all the time and go back to their wards and make sure it isn't happening there. Don't be offended, learn and change so that no one feels compelled to write posts such as this!

I think you handled it well. I would have told her the same thing, and than said no thank you to the cd, letting her know our family has our own path of faith. I think she way overstepped what is ok. I have had a lot of LDS persons come to my door, I have been polite to some, not so polite to others who do not listen, but I have never had one ask my child if they could pick them up for church!!!!! I did once have a woman, after I informed her that we are a non-christian family, look at my boys with pity and say to them "oh you poor things", I slammed the door in her face. My son also once got a religious pamphlet in a goodie bag at school. When I went to complain to the teacher I found several other moms all there holding the booklets, and the teacher saying she was so sorry, she did not know and that she would speak with the other mom who brought the bags and make sure to check all bags in the future. If someone wants to preach to me, that is one thing, I am old enough to think for my self, but they need to stay away from my kids!

My goodness, I don't think I have ever seen this much anger/rudeness/downright meanness directed toward one group of people on here! I am really disappointed in some of these replies....certainly not the mamapedia answer norm. That's too bad. To resort to name calling and accusations of being a cult and things like that just makes you sound uneducated and unaware.

Yes, she was being too forward, a little pushy and inappropriate. My question is are/were you a member of the Mormon church at some time? If so your records are going to be in the local ward, in which case I can only assume she was trying to reach out and help your child feel involved in the neighborhood with other kids his age. I can pretty much guarantee she doesn't want your boys souls! rofl! If you don't want to be contacted, let the Bishop know. As long as you are on the records of the church (if you are), they will continue to check in on you and your children-not to add to their numbers, but out of concern of support/friendship/etc. As someone who also lives in Utah I can tell you that yes, some of the Mormon neighbors are pushy and almost naggy when it comes to invites to things, but I can also tell you that there is a great sense of community and the invites to neighborhood/community events are great, and help our entire neighborhood get to know each other better, Mormon or not.

I hope that despite this woman's mistake you will find a way to politely tell her no thank you and that her offer made you uncomfortable and you'd appreciate her not coming by again. Let the Bishop know the same. THat will put an end to things. For the rest of you so concerned about people stopping at your door to try and share something that is dear to them-whatever their religion may be-if it is such an issue, get a "no soliciting" sign and put it on your door. Simple as that!

TOTALLY inappropriate of HER!! You handled it well enough.....if you see her again, maybe a little more force? Turn the tables on her...say something like "How would you like it if I came to YOUR home and offered to pick up YOUR kids and take them with ME sometime?? Do you trust YOUR kids with complete strangers? In today's day and age that would be COMPLETELY IRRESPONSIBLE!!" and leave it at that. Shut the door on her with her mouth hanging wide open.

Holy moley! Frowns on coffee? I don't drink coffee and I would run away from there.
When I was little they had a bus that kids could catch a ride to church in. So it is not completely uncommon, but I wouldn't agree either.

hahahha! Sorry, but this made me laugh! I was born and raised Mormon and have just recently switched to a different church(no, I don't hate the Mormon church or have anything against it- it was just time for me to move on).
Don't be too hard on her- although she was a little zealous in inviting your son to church without asking you first. Are you or your husband former members of the church? That would be why she came over- it's part of reactivation(or retaining membership in the church). I have had missionaries over and other people from the LDS church over to try and get me to come back to church, but I am not interested.
They are not doing this to be mean- They truly believe that this is the only way to reach one's highest potential and it really makes them sad when the gospel is rejected- I know- I felt the same way at one point in my life(for most of my life, actually).
To answer your question though, yes, it is inappropriate for her to assume that just because she is the primary president you would allow your child to come with her- but since you do live in Utah(I grew up there) she probably assumed that you knew who she was because in the LDS church- everyone knows everyone- they see each other every Sunday, and so she probably didn't even think about you not knowing who she was.
Find out who the Bishop is and just request that they don't contact you with church related stuff if you are not interested. They will respect your wishes.
Good luck!
~C.

yeah, i dont even let people i know pick up my kids, its very rare that i would, lol much less a stranger.

You are absolutely right about not letting her pick up your kid to go anywhere? People are crazy, I mean you don't even know this lady and only because she is from a church you are supposed to trust her 100% with your kid, I don't think so. Trust is something you earn, with time. She might be the "primary president" or whatever but you are the "mother" and you decide where your kid goes and with whom. Next time just tell them to go and get some other kids souls :)

Wow! How completely inappropriate of her! I live in Utah, too, so I know how it is.

The good news is, SHE probably won't be back. Unfortunately, you know that in a few years there will be a new Primary President and it may be an issue again.

I actually posted a similar issue on Mamapedia a few months ago (regarding church leaders pestering me and how to deal with them without making enemies). It is difficult because in Utah, if you are not LDS it is very easy to feel like an outsider and to make friends in the neighborhood. Whether or not you and your family are on church records, you could certainly call the bishop of the ward and tell him your family does not want to be contacted.

Ugh, I am sorry this happened to you!

OMG, I am just stunned by the balls on that woman! Either she doesn't have children so she hasn't a clue about how inappropriate she just was or she is so over the top into her religion that boundaries and ethics are inconceivable to her because she is obsessive/compulsive about her religion. Although I am not Mormon, I do have friends who are Mormon and they are not like that at all, thankfully.

I would write a letter to whoever is the head of your local Mormon meeting house, explaining the situation and request that they discuss the inappropriateness of this door knocking situation with the rest of their members. They should have stricter policies and training in place. The whole situation is just so clearly inappropriate on so many different levels.

It does sound like you had a gung-ho "primary president" there who just wanted to spread her joy without taking into account appropriate adult-child-parent boundaries.

Please let us know what, if anything, you decide to do about this and what the final outcome is. Good luck.

Absolutely stay away from her church and from HER! I can't imagine anybody soliciting like that and then talking to your child as if you weren't there. That creeps me out a little bit. I would have slammed the door in her face.

I have been reading books lately on polygamy and mormonism, and to me it all sounds cult-like. I actually HAVE been told by a mormon solicitor at my door that I would be going to hell if I didn't find the true path -- mormonism. I always try to be polite with these people and thank them for coming and tell them I have other beliefs and their repeated visits only annoy me. But if they ever talked to my kid like that I think I would not be so polite.

I guess if she shows up once more you can ask her nicely to never come to your door again.

I don't think many Mormons would agree with that lady's approach......... YIKES.... I do think it's inappropriate for anyone to do that whether Mormon, Jewish or what have you.... Perhaps you can contact the local church (if you know from which one she is calling) and ask to speak to whomever is in charge and let them know what happened. Sounds like the lady's heart was in the right place, but her approach was completely off....

I always tell people we have a church we are very happy with. For us, it's true, but if I lived in a Mormon area, I might say it regardless.

Good grief - that's the second time today I recommended telling a lie! (!)

I agree. That was very pushy.

To Mormons, the bringing of people to God is a HUGE deal. It gets them further to "heaven", right?

Why not drop a few phrases containing "non-Christian" or "cult" next time? The mere mention of polygamy should send them running. That ought to do it.

How presumptuous of her! I would have done exactly the same thing as you did.

Completely inappropriate, but not meant to do harm.
Like Marci W. said, she is probably new to being the Primary President, thought you had been to church recently, and just wanted to include your son, which would explain her surprise at your reaction.
If you don't want contact from the Mormon church, you MUST contact them and asked to be put on a "do NOT contact" list.
And it doesn't seem like she was there to judge your love of coffee. :)

I deal with the same thing and I don't get it half as bad as my daughter did when she was going to school. She went to college out of state and this was the reason. If it makes a person happy to do this then they can go for it but after I tell a person that I am not interested and they keep coming back with psychological warfare then I get upset. My own mother is the pushiest person that I have to deal with and I do not believe the way she does so I am supposedly a bad person. This post makes me laugh!! I am in Happy Valley so I get it bad!!

It was innappropriate for her to even offer, as it makes you look like the 'bad guy' to your child for not allowing them to go. This is unbelievable and infuriating. Personally, I might press harrassment charges, but that's just me. BTW, I am a born again Christian and have some Mormon friends whom I love, but this is crossing the line. Doesn't matter what faith you are, it is never okay to proselytize someone else's child!

Wow, she probably wouldn't do this just out of the blue - she probably has been given some faulty information somewhere along the line. Don't be offended, just get hold of the Bishop of the ward and kindly ask that your family not be contacted by anyone in the church anymore. It shouldn't be too hard to find out who the bishop is since you live in Utah and most of your neighbors are probably LDS.

Next time she stops by ask her "WHY IS IT ONLY YOU ARE ALLOWED FREEDOM OF RELIGION". Tell her to leave you and your family alone and she comes again you will call the police and have her removed from your property.
NO ONE should ever be pushed into a situation like that. I don't care what her intention is/was, she was totally over-stepping boundries.

People of certain religions, including Jehovah's Witnesses, believe that they are truly doing the work of the Lord by spreading the gospel and teaching others about "the word".
I've never had personal problems with either. I usually take what they hand out and thank them for stopping by, and that's it. I tell them I have my own beliefs and I don't intend to change, but I understand how important their work is to them.
That is usually all that is necessary.
However, I had one family that came on a regular basis. They were nice and not pushy, but they had their literature to give me each time. One day I heard them pull up and I put the stereo on a "Christian" music channel before they got to the door.
I was quite surprised that the woman told me it offended her to listen to it.
I said, "I told you that I believe in my own way and I'm not going to change it."
She never came back.
I don't even listen to Christian music, I have nothing against it, I know all they hymns, but I didn't want to start a discussion over my klezmer collection either.
Years ago, a friend of mine was tired of the "visits" and answered the door in her bra and panties and she never was visited again.
She is a really good person, but not answering the door didn't work, saying "No thank you" 40 times didn't work.

Many, many churches have buses and kid related activities. They believe that getting a child to church is good for them. I doubt seriously this woman was doing anything other than opening her church to you. In HER mind.
The simplest thing to do is say, "I appreciate your devotion, but I would also appreciate you not coming here every week. I'm not going to change my mind about this."
That's usually all you need to say.
They know that at least 90% of people won't be receptive. And, in their minds, that hurts their hearts because those people are missing out on the "joy" they have. But, they do understand not all people are receptive.
You CAN be kindly firm about it.

Look, I know families that have actually benefitted from having a fellowship with a church. My neighbor is all about church because she is in NA and AA and goes to workshops for women who've survived domestic violence. Going to church has become her life and it works for her. Some of us find a benefit.
The rest of us have a right to kindly say, No thank you.

Just my opinion.

I totally agree it is not appropiate for her to take your kids. I wold be finding out her number and call her telling her that it what she did was wrong and that your boys souls are fine. She should reapect your beliefs whatever they are. I have been of that faith and haven't practice for over 22 years and don't plan on ever going back. I still get calls visits and mail telling me that I need to start attending church for my chidren. I tell them that I don't and that tey are just fine with what we are teaching them from home. My daughter goes to a different religion with her Grandpa and she loves that they just accept her.

That primary President was so frar out of line that she needs to know that it was wrong. It is not right to put what they believe on other people! I know that you will get a lot of comments that say she was just trying to get your kids to come and meet others. That she meant no harm but it is still not right!!!

Flat out crazy! My dh's family is Mormon, so I don't have anything against them, but for an unknown individual to come to your door & talk about taking your child away from you?! WOW!
If I were you I would call the church & speak to whomever is in charge. Explain that under NO CIRCUMSTANCES is it acceptable for a stranger to appear at your door & offer to 'take' your child(ren) *anywhere*. I can't imagine they would be happy if you offered to take their kids to the catholic church!
If they are disagreeable, or at all pushy, you might want to suggest that you will speak to the police if they continue. I imagine the police would take a dim view of strangers offering to take your kids someplace. It's a dangerous world out there, why on earth should you believe them??

Ok, as resonding to your update...
Since both you and your husband were baptised, you are officially on the records, so that is why they keep coming.

You have a couple of options...
1-Just politely say "we aren't interested, thanks for your offer, but we don't want anything to do with it." Which you'll have to repeat each time there is a new primary president (and relief society, etc)
2- Give it a try (what can it hurt to let the kids go once? if you don't feel comfortable with a stranger picking them up, take them yourself)
3- Find out who is the biship (Call church offices and ask for the bishop, they look it up by address), and call him and ask to be removed from the records of the church. If you really, truely don't want to be contacted by them anymore, this is the way to do it.

Living in Utah and being a Mormon, I can see where you are coming from. This woman was out of line. Sometimes there are people who are a little overzealous in their actions. I have seen this in other religions too, even living in Utah. I often get visits from other faiths, I think everyone is just trying to share what makes them happy and what they believe is true. Having been in presidencies in my church I can assure you that we are truly just trying to be friendly and Christ like. Sometimes people really appreciate it and sometimes they don't and that is fine. Nobody is trying to take anyone's souls. I am sure she really was just trying to be nice and include your child. Like everyone says, let the bishop know you would like these visits to stop.

I dont blame you to be un nerved.

I am a Christian and I don't beleive anyone has to go down to a church building to be saved or worship the Lord. We worship right here in our living room. We used to go to church, but then only went twice a month. We were starting to get turned off by some of the things happening down there. The children's area teacher would call my house and ask for my 8 year old directly. That would unnerve me!! She would tell her she was going to come pick her up and take her to church on Sunday. She wouldn't even ASK me if she could!!!
No matter what religion , it's just VERY wrong to try to usurp a parents authority or to come in between the parent/child relationship like that. GOD set the family as a place where there is a bond and where the teaching of the Lord should be practiced, with the guidance of the parents. No one has the right to try to usurp that. That is why youth groups are not our cup o tea. It takes the authority and leadership out of the role of the mature parent and has the child being lead and mentored by some one else, usually just a pup himself!!!

Heck no its not ok. I dont let them get a word in I open the door say I am not interested and close it before they can say hi. That is for anyone I dont know who rings my doorbell that I dont know.

I think I would nicely say, Thanks for your concern, and no they will not be going. Goodbye, have a nice day."You are the parent, and YOU get to decide your family's spiritual path. You do not owe any explanations to anyone, and I would not feel guilty.

Wow, totally inappropriate!! I would inform anyone that talked to my child that way, that I and I alone make those decisions. I know that sounds crazy, but really she needed to be checked, I mean an eight year old does not make those kind of decisions! So I say good for you!!

This is not limited to Mormons. We have a Baptist church near us that tries the same thing.

This woman, for all that she might mean well, is completely out of line. I, too, am a "gentile" in a predominantly LDS community, and my lovely neighbors, while they do check in from time to time to see if my hubby and I are interested in hearing their testimony or would like to come down to the ward for a social event (which we have done), would never behave so badly. I wonder how she would feel if a Catholic or mainline protestant stranger were to show up on her doorstep and talk around her to her kids to try to lure them to a non-LDS church?

From what I've seen, her behavior is not normal within the LDS church. In your place, I would contact the local ward's bishop and tell him politely but clearly what she did and how inappropriate you found it. This could be in a conversation or in a letter. The LDS church wants to make a positive impression on us outsiders so they can win us over. Let him know that because of the lack of respect that this woman is showing to your family, she is giving a very negative impression as a representative of the LDS faith and of his ward.

Wow-its really hard for me to even imagine what it is like out there with one religion so dominating everything. I am not even sure I have even ever met a Mormon before it is so alien to my neck of the woods. I feel for you. Not sure I could handle such intrusions on my life.

Oh, your post makes me laugh. Especially the last sentence about their souls. :) I'm really surprised you get this much pressure, and I agree that it's completely inappropriate to think they can just snatch your child away for church. uh, I don't think so. In the 7 years we've lived in UT, we've had one or two missionaries come to our door, and most recently a very kind neighbor that we had already met when we moved (from SLC to CWH) ask if we'd be interested in having our 9 year old join the cub scouts that she was the troop leader of. I respectfully declined, and she has never pressured us again, and I see her on a fairly regular basis and she is always friendly to us (She's part of the PTA at my son's school too). What you're describing seems ludicrous! Perhaps get one of those 'No Soliciting' signs for your front door.

Edited to add: Oh, I just read your 'so what happened' post. Now it makes sense. The reason you are getting this pressure is because you used to be Mormon. Once a Mormon always a Morman, and they'll track you down no matter where you go - even out of state - and from what I've heard from friends they will never stop. I still get religious paperwork from my parent's church (to which I was baptized some 30 years ago). Good luck.

That is creep, and sooo inappropriate. It's none of her business what you do with YOUR children.

She was probably well intentioned but she was totally out of line asking your child that instead of asking you. And it probably would have been in better taste for her to wait on asking that until she got to know you better. I'm guessing that the reason she looked so upset afterward was because she realized she had made a big mistake and felt really embarrassed. Dropping off a CD is fine...asking the kid (and not the parent) to go to church with her..not so much.

I would continue to be polite unless she tries the same stunt again, in which case I would tell her that she isn't welcome in your home.

Note: I am actually Mormon myself, but I would be appalled if the Primary President was asking my child to go places with her if it was the first time we had met. Whether she is a safe person or not, she is still a stranger.

I do not agree with any religion that will attempt to by pass the parents and go directly to the children.

I'm sure she has the best intentions and just wants to try to involve everyone in the area. I would just try to talk to her about it separately from your children- tell her how you feel about different things- like whether or not you'd like your children to be able to come to activities for the kids or church or whatever so she knows where you stand. I know you mentioned you've been "dealing with them for 14 yrs" but she said she's new- so she doesn't know where you stand. good luck- and remember she's just trying to involve all the kids I'm sure. Feel free to message me to talk more- I'd be happy to.

I'm a Mormon and in the children's primary, and have also served in the Presidency.

While she had the best of intentions, it wasn't right that she went past you to your children and the church would not agree to that either, so I'm guessing there is some back story here that is missing.

However, if you don't want her or your home or visiting teachers coming around, then it is your obligation to remove your name from their records. Call the bishop up, tell them to remove your name from their records with a do not contact. They are doing their jobs to visit the homes of the members, active or not once a month. New leaders or teachers in the ward will not know that you are not active and don't want to be bothered.