Ready for the Pacifier Fairy to Come...Any Advice Needed!

I hope that these references might be helpful for you...

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/t104600.asp

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/2/t023100.asp

Best wishes,
J.

With my younger boy, we never 'took it away'. He gave it up on his own. What we did is cut the tip off of the pacifier and then when he put it in his mouth to suck on it is 'broken'. So then when my son would ask for the binky, I'd give him a broken one. Then he said he didn't want it. The first few nights were kind of rough but not as bad with my oldest son where we did take it away.

We were on vacation - he only used the pacifier at night and for the car rides. We lost it - not on purpose - well, the nearest store was a 45 min. drive - too bad. We dealt with 2 uncomfortable bedtimes and then it was never missed again.

MH

We had a "Bottle Fairy" come to our house after reading someones advice on this! We also did a diaper one... although that did not work well and I was more ready then she was :)

For several weeks prior we prepared her and let her know that the Bottle Fairy was coming to trade in her bottles for sippy cups and other big girl things. After about a week of talking about it or so we started coming out after each nap and in the morning to see if the bottles were still there. Finally one day the bottles were magically gone and in its place was cups, straws, sippy cups, sports bottles etc... she loved it and never once asked for her bottle again! She was just over 2 when we gave it up.

The diaper fairy we did the same thing... and then in a bag we had big girl panties,a cooking timer, stickers, potty books etc... was great for about a week but then she refused again. She is not ready and is slowly working on it herself without my pushing.

I think it is more stressful on us to have them give up thier comfort thing. Once it is gone she may cry a bit for it but it should not last for more than a few days. Since you will not be giving the new baby a paci you should not have her wanting that... although she may want to begin to nurse just like the baby. It is completely normal!

Good luck and many blessings to you and yours! Get your rest while you can!

Hi R.,

Congratulations. I don't think that a 2 year old is too old for a pacifier. Especially since you are having a new baby soon. Let her keep the pacifier for a little while longer at least until you put the new baby on a bottle. When she sees this you can tell her that she is a big girl and no longer needs the pacificer. She will get it. Good luck

That way your 2 year old won't get jealous of the new baby's suckling. She will have her own method of satisfying the oral fixations. ( you don't want to nurse the two of them. :)) Since it is only nap time and bed time I don't see the harm.

When my oldest was 4 the "bim-bim fairy" (that's what he called his pacifer), came and replaced the pacifer with a toy. It went smoothly after that (he was only taking it at night).

But I have to confess that when I read your post I thought: "oh, don't take her little paci away just because your having another baby." May I gently urge you to think of your girl the same way as always; she's only 2 1/2 and the addition of a new baby doesn't change that. Let her still be a baby when she needs to be. It is totally appropriate for little ones her age to have periods of regression regardless of whether a new sib arrives or not. These regressive spells are not to be avoided - they allow a child to regroup and feel secure before tackling a new developmental phase. That's why I say unless you really think the paci has to go and would be doing it regardless of the new baby, don't change your daughter's like unnecessarily right now. There's enough change on the horizon.

ONe of the most challenging things about raising a family is trying to balance what's easiest and most sensible for mom and dad with what works best for your particular child at that particular time. Good luck and congrats on the baby!

Don't know about the "Fairy". But, you might want to start cutting a small hole near the nipple. All of a sudden, the paci doesn't work and needs to be thrown a way.

No regression advice. I say build up the big sister/brother roll.

About 2 months b4 I gave birth to baby #2 I started letting my 3yr old carry a "baby" and diaper bag everywhere we went. We kept good care of her baby while we were out. That way, she had plenty of practice and knew what to do when her little brother came. She no longer carried her diaper bag, but she was great help to me (b/c of the practice she had with her baby).

I definitely WOULD NOT take her paci away when the baby comes. There will be enough transition going on during that time and that will just add to it. And since it isn't a positive transition, I wouldn't do it.

That said, with my older two children we gave their paci's to Santa. My daughter left a pile of hers on a plate next to Santa's cookies and they were gone when she woke up Christmas morning. We explained that there were babies who needed them and she was a big girl.

With our son we bagged them up in a ziplock and he gave them to Santa when he visited his daycare. He dropped the baggie in Santa's sack and that was the end of it.

Both of them asked for them a few times after that but not too much. We just reminded them of the other babies and they moved on. It was a smooth transition for us.

Hope this helps.

And as for not giving your new baby a paci because you want to breastfeed... I nursed all 3 of my children successfully and they were all paci babies. I have heard of "nipple confusion" but we didn't experience that at all.

Good Luck!

We had the "fairy" come to our house and it worked really well. And, I must admit, I was terrified that it wouldn't work.....
We talked about it for a a few weeks and then each night my son would leave his "paba" outside his door for the fairy. (He had 3 pacifers that he used...) So, each morning he would find that the fairy had taken the pacifer and left a surprise. The first two nights were little things...a puzzle or stuffed animal and then for the last night he got a remote control car.
He did good at night but we had some trouble with naps....but it may also be his age (he was almost 3 when we did this) and that he was ready to give up the nap anyway.
Good luck and stick with whatever method you try.....
Congrats on baby #2.....

My son was 2 when the pacifier fairy came. We spent a couple weeks talking it up and telling him that the pacifier fairy comes to big kids when they are ready to give up their pacifiers. The fairy then takes them to a new baby just born. As it got to the end of the first week we told him it would be very soon now and that he should let us know when he was ready for the fairy to come. He chose the specific night and put his pacifier in a special box at the end of his bed. When he woke up the pacifier was gone and the fairy had brought him a special big boy present. The transition went smoothly and he never looked back.

As for regression after a new baby - it definitely happens. My son was a bit younger than your daughter (18 months old) when his sister was born. I would say he spent most of the next 6 months acting much younger (much needier and clingy). It drove my husband batty (especially after the 1st month). He used his pacifier more rather than less, he didn't want to participate in his favorite music class (just sat on my lap), etc. 5-6 months later everything was back to normal. Nothing we did seemed to make a difference, he just adjusted back when he was ready.

If you want things easy, I would suggest you wait until a little while after the baby comes to have her give up the pacifier. Your daughter is likely to need some extra comfort at the start. And it is not like the baby is going to see her using a pacifier and want one at the start. And finally, you might not want to chance messing with your daughter's sleep right before adding the new noise of a baby to your home.

Good luck with everything!

I had my son decorate a small box for the pacifier fairy. He put stickers on it and gathered all his pacifiers to put them in the box. We explained that the pacifier fairy will take them and give them to all the new babies that don't have pacifiers yet. He went to sleep next to the box and in the morning the fairy left him a present. And he never asked for a pacifier again.

Oh, R., don't take away the pacifier till after she's settled with the baby. It's just as disruptive for her as for you to have a new baby and she's losing her mom's full attention on top of having him around all the time, all of a sudden.
A moment will present itself when you can point out how all the other pacifiers are in babies' mouths and she's *so* not a baby anymore, and she'll part with it. But I would definitely wait till well after the new baby.
Good luck with both your darlings!
Mama S.

R.,
I'm afraid that I have to agree with a lot of the other mamas. Don't take her paci away right now with the baby coming any day now. Give the whole family time to adjust to the newest member before making any other drastic changes. That being said, we had the paci fairy visit our daughter when she was about 3 1/4 years old and it was no problem because she was already so old she didn't really need it. Once you do decide to go ahead with the paci fairy idea, make sure you get all of the last stragglers out of the house because it will only make things harder if she finds any hidden under the couch a week later ;)

There will definitely be some form of regression. My older daughter was 3 at the time and was 99% potty trained and after the baby came, it took another 7 months to get her 100% potty trained. So, you can try really hard but your older child will likely have some regression because she will no longer have 100% of your attention. If you know it's normal and to be expected, it will be easier on everyone. Good luck and congrats on the new baby!

I would not take the pacifier away at the same time as when your newborn arrives, or your little girl will associate the pacifer being taken away with the new baby. Wait a couple of months and then do the Paci Fairy. I had a huge elaborate plan to do the Paci Fairy and then we actually lost his last binky (this was when he was 2) so we said the Paci Fairy took it, and that she told us he could pick out any toy he liked at Target in exchange for his binkies. It totally worked. And, we did it three months before our second baby was born. My pediatrician told me you shouldn't make any significant changes with your child within 2 months before or after a sibling is born - moving to a big bed, potty training, Paci Fairy, etc. For what it's worth! Congrats on your new baby and good luck!

We "sent" our pacifiers to our baby cousin who needed them more. Maybe you could give yours to the little brother? However, then they would still be around the house. Good luck! This is a lot of change at once for your daughter.

I breastfed, but we used a pacifer too. I think I was just super lucky, lol, because my son just started throwing it out on his own when he was around 2! He was very 'self-weaning' from breast and bottle as well, so we just didn't need a bottle fairy or pacifer fairy. I do have friends who took that approach, or others who just started letting him use it at naptime only, etc. I think Susan below is also right in saying that with the new baby might not be the best time to try and make a big change. As my mother always said " No one walks down the aisle in diapers or with a pacifier! Just don't worry too much about it. I just didn't make too big a deal out of it either way and he gave it up on his own! You never know, it could happen to you! Congratulations and good luck!

From a dental point of view, be sure to watch to see if she substitutes her thumb for the pacifier. It's easier to lose a pacifier, but the thumb is always going to be there. I've seen a lot of older children who are hooked on thumbsucking, and it can reshape the roof of her mouth if she does that, which can affect her speech.

Wow. Since Oct. 19 is literally around the corner, you don't have much time to get her up to speed on the idea of the paci fairy. While it is a great idea to have her give it up before she turns 3, it may be really hard at this exact moment. I say if you are not going to give the new baby a pacifier then you don't have to worry about her still having them in the house and regressing. Wait until the baby is about a month and then have the paci fairy come. You could have her send a letter to your house (ie. you write a letter, make it fancy and pretty, and send it to her) explaining she is now a big girl and she wants to bring her a big girl present in exchange for her pacifiers.) Then just follow through. The sooner you disengage from the pacifiers, the better. Good luck!

My daughter was VERY attached to her paci. We did the paci fairy and it did the job. I talked with her for a couple of weeks about the paci fairy so that it wasn't a huge shock to her. What we did was have her collect all her paci's and put them in a box. I then had her put it outside in our backyard for the paci fairy. We then ran an errand and when we got home she looked into the box and found a special toy. I used a doll and named her. And she was only allowed to have it at bedtime and when she is upset.(that way it stays the special comfort doll and not and everyday toy) 2 years later she will still ask for it when she upset and it gives her comfort. Now a friend of mine used the paci fairy but instead of the box she hung the paci's from a tree and put small prizes in place of them. Another idea is going to a build a bear and have her put the paci's in the bear that way there still with her. Good luck.

My daughters are 3 years apart and we had the same thing to process. My thought was that the new sibling is something whose timing cannot be changed. Everything else (in our case - binky, potty training, etc.) waited and it all worked out fine. My older girl kept the binky and we did away with it a couple months after #2 arrived. In our case the time of year worked out where we were installing a new swing set, so we talked it up several weeks ahead of time that she was growing up and getting a big kid's swingset...but she would have to give up the binky. I will admit the first couple nights were hard but then we were fine. So with all of the new and changing things in your family I would put that at the lower end of things to stress about. Good Luck and blessings to you! :)