Pull-ups Vs. Underwear

Updated on January 31, 2011
M.C. asks from Holmen, WI
29 answers

What do you moms use when potty training? Pull-ups or underwear? I've been potty training my almost 3 year old son for a month now. We're still having lots of accidents (which is totally understandable and I expect it). But, I'm doing so much laundry because he will go through 6-8 pairs of underwear and pants in one day. I'm wondering if Pull-ups would be better. I'd still take him to the bathroom as much as I do now, but I wouldn't have to change his clothes so often.

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A.G.

answers from Pocatello on

yeah pull ups aren't a good idea. I got some for my daughter when i potty trained her and yeah I learned pretty fast that aren't good. Because I would ask her if she had an accident and she would say "No" I would feel the pull up and if she had only peed a little you can't even tell. So then she would know that she could pee in them and not worry about it. Same as a diaper. So yeah either stick to underwear or maybe take a break for a while 6 to 8 times a day is kinda a lot of accidents.

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R.K.

answers from Boston on

Pull ups are nothing but an over expensive less absorbent diaper. They prolong potty training even more because he will quickly realize he can pee in them and continue with whatever he is doing. You might want to hold off the training. 6-8 accidents a day is a lot and tells me he is not quite ready even if he gets the general concept.

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E.M.

answers from Johnstown on

Pull ups are a total waste of money. You might as well just put a diaper on him. You need to start noticing his body language and get him to the potty. DO NOT ask him if he needs to go. TELL him it's time to go. Give him time to go. You may have to make him sit for several minutes at a time. Give him a book to look at while waiting. He'll catch on rather quickly once he goes a time or two.

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M.W.

answers from St. Cloud on

To be honest...... It sounds like he is just not ready to be trained. 6 to 8 accidents a day means he is not cooperating. Maybe take a break for a month???

Both our kids were not trained till they were about 3. We tried before and it just didn't work. We gave up and put them back in diapers. (Never discouraged going potty and still asked them to try to go before baths and before bed.) When we tried again around 3, they were trained within about 2 days! I can count their "accidents" on one hand! And they wore underwear to bed right away.

PS> Pull-ups are a waste of money. They feel like a diaper and just confuse the child.

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C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

a couple things stood out for me - one, it sounds like you are keeping him on a schedule of going regularly - but he's still having so many accidents that it's majorly impacting your laundry. two, you have been doing this for an entire month. honestly, it sounds as though he's not ready. pullups, imo, are a waste of money, except for the nighttime kind. but he's either ready or he's not. potty training shouldn't be this long drawn-out dramatic thing. and i think you are at the point, frustration-wise, to give it a rest for awhile. you have given it a good try. let it rest for a few weeks and then try it again. you will be surprised how easily he gets it, when he's truly ready, and then you'll know what i mean. just my two cents. good luck whatever you decide.

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S.B.

answers from Redding on

My kids never even knew what pull-ups were.
It's just my opinion and I don't mean to offend anyone, but I think it's no different than just having a diaper on your child.
Pull-ups just let kids know that if they pee or mess their pants, it's okay, because they have a pull-up on. I think it just confuses things.
Yes, accidents happen. It's all part of it. I just don't understand the reasoning from switching from one diaper to another because it's called something different.
Take your son to the bathroom every time you walk past it. Take him to have his turn every time you go. For my kids, the "potty dance" happened BEFORE they went. I could tell when they needed to go.
Don't give up and don't go backwards.
If you are at home, just put underpants on him. No need to wash regular pants. Plus, pants can be hard to get on and off for little kids. Sweat pants or things that slip down easily are best for this transition time. They can get those up and down by themselves fairly well and it gives them a sense they are accomplishing it.

Your little one will get the hang of it. Don't think of it as "training". Just a scheduling thing and getting used to the potty. If you have to, use a diaper.
Little kids eventually don't appreciate still being in one.
The pull-ups are a different story.

Best wishes.

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L.L.

answers from Chicago on

I was 100% against Pull-Up for all the reasons mentioned and more (they are like a diaper, they confuse the child, etc.) Until it was time to go to park district programs and preschool -- and diapers were not allowed. Then Pull-Ups became a part of our lives. Keep in mind -- diapers really can't be pulled up and down easily while your son trains. You cannot potty train in diapers.

It sounds like your son might not be ready to train right now. When he starts showing more signs, try again without the Pull-Ups. But when you're ready to give him ability to take an undergarment up and down without the laundry issue, go with the Pull-Ups. If you can do without Pull-Ups, great -- you'll save a lot of money! However, Child Services will not come to take your child away if you use Pull-Ups. Perhaps it may prolong the training process (another argument against Pull-Ups...and you'll never know if it is true or not.) But keeping your peace of mind is important too. Good luck!

PS...You are going to have to use Pull-Ups at night, even after he is potty trained. Most children aren't able to make it through the night until they are, at least, 4 and often 5.

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C.R.

answers from Dallas on

I understand the headache of doing the laundry! I really don't like the pull ups and tried them with my boys but found they really used them like a diaper and it didn't help with getting them trained. I even tried the ones that felt cool when they got wet. The only time I would use them is if we were going somewhere for a long trip or be out for a lengthy time. It would save the nasty clean while we where out and about.
He simply could not be ready yet if it's not bothering him to be wet or dirty. It may be close but just not yet. You may want to back off for a couple of weeks and then try again if he's having that many accidents.
Most of the time we are ready before they are. lol
Best Regards,
C.

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E.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

It can be torture to go through that much laundry, for you and your son. Try a package of pull-ups and see how it goes. It may end up being a life saver. He might get a chance to focus on potty time rather than new outfit time! Good luck!

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S.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

I haven't gone through potty training yet but I plan to try underwear with the waterproof pants/undies over them, then at least he won't through his real pants every time?? I've seen them at Target and my neighbor who has potty trained three girls says that worked for her. I've heard a lot of people say that if you go with Pull-Ups it's kind of just another diaper and you're using pull-ups for awhile then. But I think a lot of people do pull-ups just at night.

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A.R.

answers from Omaha on

I tried training my almost 3 year old boy and he was having constant accidents. We decided he wasn't ready. We waited a couple months and tried again and it was a night and day differance. He potty trained quickly with only a few accidents. I always use underwear. Pullups just don't work for potty training. Also, I never used pants when I was potty training, only underwear.

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C.F.

answers from Milwaukee on

I pull ups with my daughter and then started using a "potty timer" or egg timer. I set it for every half hour and took her to the bathroom. We eventually switched to normal underwear. She did have a few accidents at first but didn't like the feel of wet undergamrments.
During the night I would make her go potty right before bed and eliminate liquids around 6pm. Also I invested in rubber sheets for her bed. We were working towards a goal. I told her she wouldn't be able to go to school if she wasn't potty trained. Eventually she caught on during the summer and was able to go to school.

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C.T.

answers from New York on

While I've heard boys are different and we have only potty trained our little girl, we will most likely use the same technique... We went with the undies during the day and pull-ups at night. When we used the undies we purchased some plastic panties covers that, while they did not keep the undies dry, it kept most of the urine contained until we could get off the regular pants then take off the undies in a suitable location - tile bathroom floor or bathtub.

Unfortunately, laundry seems to be part of the equation.

Good luck!
~C.

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B.R.

answers from Des Moines on

We did pull-ups for about a month, and we asked our son when/if he was ready for big-boy pants. (FYI - he was also a few months shy of 3). Then we got to where we did about half and half for maybe a week or so, letting him pick what he wanted to wear. He was excited to wear the character underwear, so this was good motivation to him.

Sticker chart worked well for him too, and we also did M&Ms when he went potty (I know, some people are against this, and I was too -- but my mother in law started it, and it worked like a charm. Didn't last that long.)

Your son is old enough and smart enough to know that pull-ups are like diapers. We got to the point that our son only ever had accidents in pull-ups, which he wore at daycare longer than he wore them at home. We quit the pull-ups, and the accidnts stopped. That was after about two months of training.

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L.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

If he's having that many accidents a day, I don't think he's ready to be out of diapers. Once he's ready, I would use underwear only. That's what I did for all four of my kids. They potty trained in a matter of two or three days. Good luck!

J.G.

answers from San Antonio on

i use both, but what I like best are the very thick "training pants" that I found in the baby aisle at Target -- they're a couple feet away from the toddler underwear. Bought GERBER brand 3-pack for $5 or $6. We might go thru 3 pair in the evenings when we are best about potty training, but at least no pee gets on the couch or runs down his leg. The thick training pants work better than underwear, but not as aborbent as a pull up. Pull ups tend to be identical to a diaper, yet with an elastic waist.

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M.F.

answers from Lincoln on

In my house we use pull-ups until there is a little more bladder control and then I switch over. Yes you will still go through a lot of pull-ups, but at least you don't have to do laundry every day filled with all the dirty underwear. Once the child becomes a little more aware of when to go, then I make the switch. There will still be accidents, but at least not at much.

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C.V.

answers from Davenport on

Both my boys didn't like pull-ups. They really liked going to the store and picking their new underwear. Yes, it was a lot of laundry but they did learn. :) I also bought a lot of little toys for rewards. Hots wheels, bubbles, dollar store things. Good luck!!

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M.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

We use underwear but put a pull up over. This helps allow her to feel it but prevents messes. Often her accidents are just a little bit and don't get to the pull up so they can be reused. But when it's a big accident or at nap time its nice to have the pull up. I've found its best to be consistent so we use underwear with a pull up over all day. Definitely wait on nighttime training until you get day down. We still use diaper at night. We use stickers for rewards and make a big deal when she tells us she has to go. We also found a foldable potty seat on Amazon for use in public, works great! Good luck!

H.X.

answers from Los Angeles on

you can try pull ups, but they are very expensive. My daughter did not take to them at all.

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J.V.

answers from Chicago on

How does he learn that pee goes in the potty when you give him pants that he can pee in? Either he is too big for diapers or he isn't.

It takes time. Yes, it is messy. yes, you have to do more laundry, but it is worth it, and I believe it takes less time if you go whole hog at it.

M.M.

answers from San Antonio on

I encountered the same problem, regular under were too thin. I started using (and still do) Potty Scotty for my son. It's training underwear that's really thick. They'll still have accidents of course, but this underwear is thick so their pants don't get drenched. I purchased 12 pair. That way I always have some clean ones for him. When I was training him I'd take extra underwear & pants w/me where ever I went just in case. My son still uses pull-ups at night. But there are NO more accidents during the day.

I don't recommend using the pull-up during the day for training. The pull-ups keep them "too dry" when they have accidents, and they don't get that uncomfortable wet feeling. It will take longer to train him. Keep using underwear, just buy extra pairs. If you can, give the potty scotty a try: http://www.pottyscotty.com/Potty-Training-Pants.html (For girls: http://www.pottypatty.com/CTGY/Potty-Training-Pants.html )

Also - make sure you invest in a good potty chair. I swear by this one: http://www.target.com/Baby-Bjorn-BABYBJ%C3%96RN-Potty-Cha... It really helped my son. He could sit to pee in it too. We had another chair and it was uncomfortable for him and pee would get everywhere. We kept the chair in the living room while we where training him.

It get's better and the accidents will decrease.
Hang in there! Good luck! :)

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M.D.

answers from Victoria on

I will keep it short. I dont like the idea of pull ups, I used them only at night. I saw no need for it during the day- its the same as a diaper. Good luck in your potty training endeavors... He will get there soon.

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A.S.

answers from Eugene on

Pull-ups didn't work for us. Might as well of had on a diaper. I could never get them off fast enough when she was first learning. Then got lazy of even asking, because I knew she wasn't going to go on the floor. I went through one small pack and never bought them again. Them peeing on themselves in part of the learning processes and give us the sense of urgency.

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L.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

The problem with pull-ups is that they work too darn good. When a kid wets himself, there's no physical consequence (its all absorbed)! Also, pull ups are EXPENSIVE.

Every child and family is different. My family customs don't include pull-ups. In the old days, there were no pull-ups, so kids went cold turkey. I think there's some credit to this, because there's no confusion in the kid's mind. A pull-up looks and feels like a diaper, so I can't blame a child for "using" it. Heck, some days I wish could wear a pull-up the way I run around!

It's easiest to diaper-wean in warmer weather because there's a lot less clothes to deal with. It also helps if your son has preschool friends/neighbors/cousins who are also potty-training at the same time. (Peer pressure works--use it!)

When going straight to underwear there will be couple accidents, When I trained my son, if an accident happened, we just calmly cleaned it up, saying, "I know you'll do better next time!" (No punishment.) Another good attitude is simply stating, "Everyone uses the toilet. This is simply what we do."

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I think people who have time to use underwear and the extra money it costs to do all the extra laundry plus floor cleaning must be bored or something. I sure get tired of doing laundry around the clock and cleaning up pee off the floor. Plus the house stinks if you don't use pull ups.

The mental part of potty training can be helped with a reward. We used jelly beans. One for pee in the potty and two for pooh in the potty. Potty training was really easy, I don't stress about it anyway, whey they are ready it's very, very easy.

I say use pull ups and give rewards, we get rewards for doing stuff every day and those rewards is what gives us incentive to do it again. I get paid for ironing for customers, I treat myself to chocolate if I meet a goal. We all have things like this we do, why not reward going to the potty. The pull ups will make potty training much easier on you.

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L.L.

answers from Topeka on

Time to take a break & refresh in a month or two while you do this just use diapers if he knows how to take them off which I think all kiddos do by this age

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L.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

I did not read your posts, but here is my theory on potty training.
Why try kids when u want them to do it-they will do it when they want to do it.
My DD who is now 5 yrs old trained herself in a day-yes a day-she decided she wanted to do it-I encouraged her along the way, but never pushed. She wore pull ups at night for maybe a month no problem-I can count on one hand the accidents she had since then-a total of 2.
My DS who will be 4 nxt wk-same things-he decided on his own. #2 came approx 1 month later, but he did it on his own terms. I still use pull ups at night and we call them big boy underwear for nighttime-it works for us-he is dry all night-i use it more as a precaution.As far as acidents same for him maybe 2 times-Not sure what the rush is for everyone, but if u let them do it at their own pace it is so much easier for YOU and THEM!!!!!!! L. :)

L.M.

answers from Dover on

The problem w/ pull-ups is the kids tend to feel like it is no big deal to "have accidents" in them because they are like diapers. They do still leak so you will still have accidents. Although when going somewhere they do make life a bit easier, I have found that potty training w/ training pants tends to help speed the process.

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